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新手介紹、宣傳、及故事推薦
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求指點>///<
#2
遙魂
⋅
6 years ago
哈囉,你的文真的不錯
Reply
#3
如夢似幻*(至冬)夢之彼
⋅
6 years ago
好羨慕...我國中文筆比國小還爛...TAT
Reply
#4
楓星
⋅
6 years ago
很不錯的作品呢,整個故事架構可以參考航海王,雖然是卡通卻有很多部分值得學習,例如大媽篇主角的夥伴被香吉士被敵人帶走強制通婚,主角魯夫和其他夥伴們卻不顧一切的想拯救他,這也可以套用在少女小說上,來證明主角和配角的友情,也可以適時加入新腳色喔,如果再加入一點幽默整體的感覺會更好,我很多文章甚至是考試的作文都是從航海王的劇情學來的呢,不過航海王號稱史上最會拖劇情的動漫,所以直接去維基百科看劇情摘要的話會快很多,希望對你有幫助
Reply
#5
阿雀
⋅
6 years ago
你的文筆不錯喔,但是有些位置看得一頭霧水,例如為甚麼有神獸或是既然神獸是惡的,為甚麼會被叫作「神」?幽界是甚麼?不過劇情我很期待的說~
Reply
阿雀
⋅
6 years ago
@彩萌, 好喔好喔,你要加油。不過我覺得應該用劇情解釋啦
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阿雀
⋅
6 years ago
@彩萌, 嗯嗯
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