mm. mmmmm. so.
Robotics. If you don’t know what robotics is, it’s called robotics, and it’s about robots and electronics.
Okay so if you don’t actually know what robotics is (first of all, you’re dumb), it’s about engineering and designing robots to perform tasks that can, I dunno, help out humans in real life. Robots and stuff. But, when I say robotics, I mean the baby version. The one you do for sport. That’s the kind I’m describing this time.
My mom and I were searching for- no, let me rephrase that. My mom was trying to find me something to do so that I’d stop… being basically a nuisance. Not like I was a nuisance, I’m a very nice and non-annoying kid. But… still, we searched- er, she searched, for something for me to do.
Eventually ‘we’ found some things for me to do, and one of them was a robotics program, which I was the most interested in. The robotics program is a children’s program that allows kids from 3rd grade all the way to 7th to engage in a creative exercise that involves designing, building, and using robots. You get to make a robot and design it to complete a ton of missions or tasks- if you do the tasks right, you get points. That’s basically it. There’s a ton of other robot stuff you have to do, like… robot design, and robot project, and teamwork-
You… don’t give a damn. You don’t care at all. Hey, Alan, how in the world does this have to do with girls? Well, hold on, don’t get mad at me, get mad at the autho- shoot.
“You wanna join this robotics thing?”
My mom randomly asked me to the kitchen and asked that question one day. At this point in time, I was really interested in technology. I liked using computers, and it was extremely fun to mess around with the software or whatever you do on computers. I was interested enough to say yes to her question.
“Who do you want on your team?”
“I dunno, who wants to be on a robotics team?”
“I dunno, but I can ask around for people that might want to be in robotics.”
“Sure, yes please.”
See how polite I am? I am a very, very polite person! What, do you not believe me? Here, here’s a story! I very politedly responded to a situation. Here’s the situation:
My mom called me to the kitchen again, and showed me a list of names. I said everyone I knew’s names and said that those people were the only ones I wanted. I ignored everyone else’s names. Of course, that ended up meaning the only people I wanted were guys, cause… uh, cause girls suck! Yeah, yeah, girls suck!
“What about girls?”
“What about them?”
“Well, don’t you want some girls on your team?”
“Why… would I want some girls on my team?”
“I dunno, so you boys don’t get too reckless?”
Boys? Reckless? What in the world is my mom talking about?
“Here, there’s people like Caitlyn Da-”
“NO!”
“W-”
“NOT HER! DEFINITELY NOT HER!”
“Caitlyn?”
“YEAH, NO, NOT HER, NO!”
See? I’m the most polite a person could be!
Okay I lied, BUT… eh, it doesn’t matter. Hmm… maybe I could’ve also said yes to Caitlyn, too… in- in regards to her being on my team, of course. Uh, yeah, if I said yes to Caitlyn being on my team, maybe the rest of this story might be completely different- or, of course, I still would’ve probably acted the exact same or Caitlyn might’ve… left the team, or declined, or I don’t know I don’t want to think about multiversal possibilities right now I’d rather talk about dumb robots
My team was set up. We had 8 members on our team. I was friends with all of them, and I knew all of them pretty well. Well, I would assume so, I wanted these guys on my team, for crying out loud. I dunno why I was the one who got to make all of the decisions, but I did, and, I think everything worked out great. Here, let me introduce the members of my team. None of them are gonna be important for this chapter, but some- most of them are gonna be important later on. Have I been saying that too much?
1. Me (Obviously)
2. James. Remember that one guy from… I dunno, a while ago? Big nose? Yeah, I think the nose part definitely got your attention. NOSE. Yeah, that got your attention. Uh, so, this blonde kid did the programming and stuff. The boring stuff. Managing, arguing with people, being incredibly annoying, you know, regular James stuff.
3. Leo. Remember Leanna from that four square chapter? Her name is long for Lea. Leo, Lea? Notice the similarities? They aren’t siblings, or anything. Or lovers- uh, ew? 5th grade lovers? Gross? Never mind. So, this Leo kid (full name is Lionel), he, uh, did a lot of the programming too. He’s dyslexic, and has ADHD, and… no, he’s a normal guy. He’s really funny. Abnormally funny. He’s really talkative (really tying back to his ADHD thing, aren’t I?), and… you know? I don’t actually need to talk about these characters that much.
4. Finn. Nice guy.
5. Troy. Nice guy.
6. Jaidon. Nice. Okay, I’m done with the- JAIDON?! OH NO GOD NO oh it’s a different Jaidon… thank god… wait, a different one? Yeah, there’s two now. Hmm… what’s different about them? Well, one of them is named Jaidon Debral, and the other is named Jaidon Afroudis. There. Difference seen? Okay, one of them is a devil, and the other one is a dev… they’re both kinda not good. Debral is the like, uh, annoying devil? And Afroudis is the… weird kind of devil. Not emo, or… furr… never mind… but, just, weird. Weird devil. Yeah.
7. Logan. Like the paul and like the wolf, he’s a chill dude. Wait, neither of them- he’s cool. Really laid back. Extremely, incredibly laid back. He’s cool.
8. Number 8. Sounds like the most important one, right? (Besides Number 1- me. I’m the most important.) Well, this one is… not… important. Uh. SO Number 8 is Westley. Not wess-lee, WEST-lee. You know, like the direction. West-ley. Funny name, right? Dunno why his parents wanted to name him that, but, there he goes. It’s long for West, so… West. Like the direction. Funny, huh? I think it’s funny.
Uhh…. uhhhhhhh…
That’s the members!
Now to the story!
I need to get better at these transitions
So, we needed to make a name, huh? Well, we spent a long tim
Robo-Wreckers. You read the title of the chapter. No need to go into it. Our team didn’t take very long to come up with it, either, so why should I? I don’t give a damn.
What I DO give a damn about, is our FIRST COMPETITION WOOOOOOOOO
It was a big deal for us so play along
We arrived at the random school that held the competition and put our stuff down. We weren’t going to do the missions or whatever yet, so we had some time to kick. Time to… spend? How do you kick time? What did I just type
“BECKY?”
Oh my- you’re joking.
“Uh… Anna?”
WHY IS SHE HERE?
“What’s wrong, Anna?”
Oh, oh no.
“Jaidon, look! It’s Becky!”
WHY IS HE HERE?
“Jaidon? Why’re you here?”
James, being the (synonym for person) he is, asked this. Remember, he was part of the ‘Friend Group’? Yeah. He knew them, asked them, NO WAIT WHY ARE JAIDON (not our Jaidon- the other- Debral. The… devil one. Uh. The… the one from last book.) AND ANNA HERE?! SPECIFICALLY ANNA
“Oh, we’re just here for competition, duh?”
“It’s our first year.”
“Ha, noobs. We’ve been doing this for a year already.”
Jaidon sounded sooo confident while saying that.
“Wow, so your team should advance, right?”
Assuming they were on a team together, I had them pinned dow- not literally. That’s weird.
“And if you’re so smart, you should advance too, right?”
“We will.”
“Bet.”
“Bet.”
I just made a bet with the other team. Without talking to the rest of my team. Sorry guys, bets prioritize friends. Er, I should’ve not said that. Whatever. Our team is pretty new, but I think we’ll win. Or advance. Advance to the next competition. I know we will. Right, Anna? Wait why are you
“If you advance to regional, you like Caitlyn.”
“Ex-huzwhah? No? I don’t- I never- what?”
“See?”
“What? No! I don’t like her!”
“Alright, then don’t advance.”
“But you… you bet that I wouldn’t advance! So-”
“Maybe I did, but to be honest, you probably will win, right?” You’ve got Nerd on your team, after all.”
“Who?”
“Nerd? James?”
Huh. James’ nick name is Nerd. Not sure who came up with that nick… was it Caitlyn? Wait, why would I care if she did? It was probably Anna, she’s the annoying one! I- uh… never mind.
“Oh. Uh, sure, he’s smart-”
“And you have Midget on your team, too, which… well, it probably won’t help, he’s kinda dumb-”
“Who?”
“Midget? West?”
Huh. West’s nick- he already has a nick- never mind. Not sure who… I’m not gonna copy and paste the exact same paragraph, don’t freak out.
Alright, so, I figured it out. If Anna wants to win, I have to win. So… if I lose, she loses. Okay… but that’s basically just her being on my- THAT MEANS SHE’S ON MY TEAM NO EW GET AWAY
“So… actually, how about, if I don’t advance, I like Caitlyn instead?”
There. Now, if I win, she loses, and if- that’s just a normal bet, then. Oh, Anna- she’s trying to mess with me. Don’t worry, though, I’ve thought a lot, I spent a long time thinking, so
“No.”
Uh oh. So… do I lose, and let Jaidon win, or do I win, and let Anna win? Obviously I can’t let Jaidon win, but- oh I know that if I ever, EVER let Anna win, I’d be basically… killing myself. Yeah, no, maybe that’s not right. Letting Anna win would be worse than dying.
So… I have to let… Jaidon win? Hmm… I can sabotage the entire thing, and like, I dunno, break the robot, and make it so that we lose, so that Jaidon win-
Hmm.
Well, I can’t just not let a chance like this pass up! Hammer time!
I’m KIDDING! I would never! Unless…
God… DAMN IT I LET ANNA WIN
Yeah, I decided to not ruin the rest of my teammates down. And I decided to let Anna win.
GODDAMN IT I LET ANNA WIN
GOD
GOD ACTUAL DAMMIT
No, I’m actually mad.
Oh, I just spoiled that we advance I DONT GIVE A DAMN I LOST TO ANNA
Yes, I’ll go into detail about what happened with the whole winning and the awards (ooh awards) BUT PLEASE I’M STILL REMINICICATING OR WHATEVER THE WORD IS IN MY OWN SORROW
Okay details or whatever i dont care
So my team finished with a ton of missions done or whatever, and we came back to where we put our stuff down, and we celebrated. I didn’t. I was preparing for the worst. I’ll either get torn apart by a demon child, or I’ll be… bombarded with hellfire. Same thing, huh? Wait, right, I already spoiled it- eh, I don’t care, just pretend you didn’t read that last part. Not the literal last part the you know that part yeah
We saw the second group come in, and they sat down right next to us. They started celebrating, too. Sounds like they got a ton of missions done too. Cool. We all played card games, like, uh, Exploding Kittens? Ever heard of it? It’s like… uh, a bomb defusing game, kinda? But with cats and goats? I dunno- why din’t I just say a normal card game like uno why do i have to say the weirdest things
ANNOUNCEMENTS CAME ON BOOM WE RAN TO THE AUDITORIUM CAPS LOCK I DON’T CARE
We all got into the stands, both of our teams right next to each other- ew, by the way, that’s gross- and we were waiting.
The adults started to say which teams were advancing, and the two of us waited patiently.
Teams went by. Neither of ours were called. They were handing out yellow pieces of paper to teams that advanced, and there were only 3 left.
‘The next team is… (don’t feel like coming up with a random name so imagine some 2nd grader’s soccer team name… Like... ‘The Orange Tigers’... yeah, that sounds cool.)’
The next team wasn’t us. I looked over at Anna and Jaidon’s group. Anna was looking at me. Jaidon was looking at me. They both smirked. I shot a mean look at both of them.
‘The next team is… Cyber Void!’
Ugh… not- wait. The people right next to us cheered. Our team looked over at them. It was… ugh… it was Anna’s group. They advanced. I guess I never bothered to learn their name, huh? Doesn’t matter now. And I don’t care.
They finished cheering. Jaidon grabbed the golden piece of paper, and showed it straight into my face, laughing and giggling. I stared him down. He really thinks he’s won. I’ll prove that he hasn’t. Our team will- wait- what happens if both of our teams- never mind. I don’t care. I only care that our team moves on. Let’s see what happens- again, I already spoiled it.
‘The last team to advance is…’
C’mon…
‘The Ro…’
There’s… a lot of possibilities for a team name to start with ro, so…
‘Bo…’
Robo? Really? Creative.
‘Wr…’
Alright that’s enough suspense we won
‘The Robo-Wreckers!’
WHAT THE
WHAT THE HELL HOW DID WE MOVE ON AS 5TH GRADERS
Reminder, we were going up against 3rd to 8th graders. We beat middle schoolers. Anyway, we walked up and got our ticket. Our parents took pictures, whatever, but that’s not the main point. We sat back down. We looked over at the other group. The, uh, Cyber Voids. They were not happy. We weren’t happy they won. It was mutual. But one person on their side was happy.
I looked over at the other team. Anna. Stared straight into her face. Her litt- nope 5th grader
Uh, so she wasn’t mad.
And what’s the opposite of mad?
Happy.
“Becky, you know what that means, right?”
“Ugh, shut up, Anna.”
“You like Caitlyn!”
“SHUT UP!”
By the way, neither of our teams advanced again after that. We were smart, but we weren’t intelligent.155Please respect copyright.PENANAPdcWjiX5JF