I’m not an idiot. I DO know what a phone is.
Last time a ‘phone’ was mentioned, I called it a tiny square rectangle that I wasn’t able to recognize. If you forgot why it existed in this story, well, Anna was using it to take pictures of… some normal, interesting stuff. Of some kids wrestling. But, yes, I am NOT stupid. I know what a phone is.
Cell phone, mobile phone, it doesn’t matter whatever the hell you call it, cause I… don’t care about your opinion in the slightest. You already knew that, though. If you didn’t, then don’t tell me about it, I won’t care. Back to our focus of our conversation, phones. I was well aware of what it was now, now that I had one.
That’s right! I’ve come of age to be able to have such a device! A phone! And I’m only 11! Is 11 too young to give a kid a phone? Eh, I’ll figure that out when I’m older. And I have… kids- uh, no, I should definitely not be talking about any of this right now. Kids are gross. Especially girls, mind you.
My first phone was a shiny, somewhat new (passed down, of course), and brilliant in my eyes, Iphone 5C. What? What’s wrong? What’s wrong with Iphones? Oh, you meant how old it- hmm. Hey, in my defense, only the adults were seen using the brand new Iphone 8s, so, I was perfectly fine using a phone that still worked well. Worked somewhat well. Somewhat not well. I- okay, it was kinda a bad phone at the time.
Did I care? Yeah course I did but I mean it’s fine
I was just happy I got something to you know, be cool. You know, like the cool kids. Yeah, yeah, having a phone meant you were in the cool squad. Trust me, I was part of them.
AAAAAIIIEEEEEEEEEEEE I GOT A PHONE YAYYYYYYYYY
Now that my celebration is over, I should really get around to actually using the phone, and not just telling people about it. So, I should go around and ask everyone I knew what their phone number was, right?
No. That’s a sign that you’re trying too hard to be popular or to show that you’re trying to be noticeable. That’s wrong. People who do that are wrong. Don’t be like those people, and don’t try to talk to other people.
-Some U.S. President, maybe?
So using the President’s advice, I didn’t ask any of my friends for their phone numbers. I brilliantly walked around school, holding my phone in my hand but slightly concealing it, hoping someone would notice, and potentially they might ask me for my number. You know, the ‘Wanna exchange numbers?’ line. And then I would say: ‘Sure, I guess.’. It was genius, I didn’t have to go out of my way to start a conversation, and I could get people’s phone numbers. It was just like the Four Square situation, if you remember that.
So, yes, I walked around school, slightly holding my phone out. Not using it. If I used it too much, people would notice, and think I’m a… loner! And I’m not a loner! Sure, I have a phone nad I have… no one’s phone number, BUT! It’s all part of my master plan! I just know this is the best plan I’ve come up with so far! I’m so smart!
2 days went by without anyone asking me for my phone number.
Hey, hey, it’s okay! Soon, someone will come by and ask for my number! I just know it!
2 more days went by.
Okay, I’m getting worried. Am I not holding my phone out enough? Is that the problem? I’m pretty sure if you just show people that you have a phone, they should immediately want your number, right?
No?
Nah, who am I kidding, I know everything, of course it’s right!
“Hey Becky!”
WHO THE HELL JUST I don’t know who that was
“Who- oh, god, of course.”
“Hi Becky!”
Yeah. Anna. Always right there. Of course.
“What do you want?”
“What, do you not like talking to me?”
NO WAY HOW’D SHE FIGURE IT OUT SHES A GENIUS
“Uh, I absolutely love talking to you, duh?”
“You do?!”
“No.”
“Oh.”
“You annoy me too much.”
“Oh. So you don’t want my number?”
NUMBER NUMBER NUMBER ###### NUMBER NUMBER
“Wait wait wait wait, no, I do wan-”
“Ooh, Becky…?”
Shouldn’t have said that.
“You want my number, Becky?”
“No, no! Not at all!”
“Uh huh… so, you don’t want my number?”
“No!”
“Do you want other people’s numbers?”
“Well, yeah, I had this like plan-”
“So you want Caitlyn’s number?”
“Which involved getting, sure, Caitlyn’s number, and- oh no.”
I- SHE- I WAS RAMBLING, AND SHE SAID SOMETHING THAT I HAD TO - I- NO
“YOU WANT HER NUMBER?!?”
“No! No, Anna, no, no, no! I don’t!”
“I’m gonna tell her!”
“No!”
Okay, yes, I didn’t want Anna to tell her, but… it’s not like I didn’t… want her number… I guess I wanted… Caitlyn to ask me for my number. Er, that- hmm. No, I guess I do want- if Anna talks to her and- I need to stop thinking.
“Anna, just don’t!”
“Don’t what?”
“Tell Caitlyn I want her number!”
Oh, COME ON! Did I really just say that?
“Becky, did you just say to tell Caitlyn you wanted her number?”
Yeah, I realize that I did.
“NO!”
“What?”
And… Caitlyn heard her name. Anna almost ran into her, but when she noticed she was standing there, she started rambling off.
“Caitlyn! Hi! Here’s Becky!”
“Becky? What about him?”
I walked up to them. I wove to Caitlyn, who slightly smiled.
“So, Becky?”
“So, what?”
Anna was talking to me, and motioned her hands towards Caitlyn.
“What about her?”
“Aren’t you gonna ask her?”
I looked at Caitlyn. She looked back at me with a semi-confused face.
“I- I don’t have anything to ask you.”
“Really? Really, Becky?”
Anna was staring at me with a disappointed face. Man, I never miss seeing that.
“What did I do wrong?”
“Dude, just, like, ask her.”
Since when was she the ‘mature person’? I’m pretty sure I’m the one that holds that title. Not someone like you.
I stared at her, and she made the ‘what’ mouth effect, and I motioned for her to come towards me.
“What’s up with you? Why’re you trying to make me do this?”
“What’s wrong, Becky? I thought you were screaming earlier that you wanted her nu-”
“That- that didn’t happen. We both know that that was just you… being, dumb, or whatever.”
“Fine, Becky.”
As she made a pouty face (I did too), I started to think about the things she was saying. Having Caitlyn’s phone number… huh… that could lead to a lot of potential things… well, who knows what could happen, maybe I’d get mad that she was just able to always annoy me OUTSIDE of school, which, of course, is a bad thing, or… maybe I’d be happy to see her texts… well, it’s not like I know the feeling of seeing someone’s name light up with a few words underneath it, I don’t even have anyone’s phone number!
“So you don’t fantasize about having her number ever?”
“Huh? What? No! Of course not!”
“Sure, Becky.”
“Uh… I have an idea…”
Okay, hear me out.
“How about… you give me your number… and…”
“Oh my god, Becky, did you just ask me for my number?!”
STOP SCREAMING
“Huh?”
OH NO
“What did Becky do?”
“Oh, Caitlyn! Becky just asked me for my number!”
“NO! I DID- I DIDN’T! SHUT UP, ANNA!”
That wasn’t actually how I wanted my plan to go, by the way. I was planning on asking Anna to give me Caitlyn’s number, and like, I dunno, pretend I was texting… the pizza guy about my order, and then like, it would be a cute whole misunderstanding- I said cute on accident that doesn’t even make sense
“So, you don’t want my number?”
“I- I don’t care.”
“Fine, since you’re soooo brave, I’ll give you my number.”
Brave? What does asking someone’s number have to do with bravery? Especially for someone like Anna?
“But only if you ask Caitlyn for her number.”
She whispered that.
“NO I’M NOT THAT BRAVE”
Oh that’s where bravery comes in
“So I guess you don’t get my number.”
“Fine!”
“You’ll just have to settle for Caitlyn’s number then, huh?”
I looked at Anna. She wasn’t looking at me anymore. She was staring Caitlyn down, who had wide eyes. She’s kinda just been standing there the entire time while Anna and I argued the whole time, huh? Sorry. Wait, why am I apologizing? It’s Anna’s fault that this whole thing is happening, I don’t even want her number! Course, like I mentioned, it could provide a limited amount of benefits rarely, but besides that, it’s useless! Anyway, uh, when Caitlyn heard her name, she made a tiny startled face. She looked at Anna back, making a quarter-disgusted face, then looked at me.
“Uh, no, I don’t want this guy’s number!”
Anna put her hands on her hips, and didn’t say anything. She sighed, though. Dunno what that means.
“What?”
“What?”
Caitlyn and I both said what at the same time. I rolled my eyes. But smiled, of course. ‘Jinx’, as the kids would say. I should maybe talk about that, shouldn’t I? Jinx? No, not that dumb kids game, it’s not like we’re CHILDREN or something! I meant like the Pokemon!
“You guys are so dumb.”
“You’re so dumb!”
“You’re dumber!”
Anna walked towards me, turning her body and facing her… face… towards mine. She walked close to me, and whispered in my ear.
“Just ask her, dummy.”
“I’M NOT- ugh.”
She walked away. Good riddance. Hate that girl. Hate her so much sometimes. She’s sometimes bearable, but other times, I can’t stand her.
“Um…”
Oh, shoot, right, my actual main problem.
“Oh, hey, nice weather we’re having today, isn’t it?”
I’m sweating balls.
“Not really, actually.”
“Yeah, I was just, uh, kidding.”
“Uh, okay… so, you wanted to ask me something?”
I feel like Caitlyn asking this question has been repeated like, I dunno, 8 times. Has it? Do I care? No, continuity is funny. If you use it the right way, and who knows if I’m using it the right way. I don’t care.
“Actually, yes.”
NO WAY WHAT IS THIS IS THIS ACTUAL BRAVERY AND CHARACTER GROWTH
“Do you have a phone?”
NO WAY I WAS RIGHT
“Uh, yes?”
C’MON ME YOU CAN DO THIS
“Should I get one?”
WHAT
“What?”
“A phone?”
“You’re asking me if you should get a phone?”
I tucked my phone deeper into my pocket. I hid it from her. I was… pretending I didn’t have one. I peeked downwards to make sure it was invisible.
“Uh… yeah.”
“Uh… okay, well, sure, get one…?”
“Thanks!”
I don’t- I don’t-
“BECKY WHAT WAS THAT?!”
I don’t-
“WHAT DID YOU EVEN JUST ASK HER?!?!”
I don-
“WHY DID YOU ASK THAT?!”
Hey stop yelling at me, I was just scared (Scared of what?)!
“I dunno.”
“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”
“Hey, stop yelling, this is all part of my master plan.”
It- it isn’t.
“YOU’RE SO DUMB!”
“Hey, fine. Okay, here’s my master plan. Can I have your number?”
“Ooh, Becky, asking for my number?”
How can she change the tone in her voice so quickly?
I don’t care, actually.
“Yes, whatever, it’s part of my plan. Can I?”
“Sure, here.”
She handed me her phone. I took out mine, and stared at it for a second.
“Here.”
I don’t know how to add contacts. I gave Anna my phone hoping she would know how to-
“Becky, do you know how to add contacts?”
“Uh… yeah, shut up, but, you’re probably… faster than me, or whatever.”
She smirked. Laughed. I rolled my eyes. She added my contact in, and hit the message button, and typed something out. She handed my phone back, and I saw a message had appeared.
129Please respect copyright.PENANAlC4X23UlxN
OMG BECKY???
Is this you Anna?
no its banana
I don’t know who Banana is
lol its anna
129Please respect copyright.PENANAijiTkBbeMv
I got my first contact. Anna. First of all, yes, ew, it was Anna, but don’t worry! It was all part of my master plan!
129Please respect copyright.PENANAIoLkMETl3H
Can I just tell you my plan instead of text?
sure idc why do u text so weird
???
lol nvm
129Please respect copyright.PENANAaFbAEtFtVN
I didn’t know what the random letters meant. Don’t worry, I eventually learned them. That’s not the point, don’t pay attention to that.
“So… can you give me Caitlyn’s number?”
We were talking in real life now. Notice the transition? Quotations for real life, no quotations for texts? You’ll get used to it.
“Nope!”
WIAT THATS NOT PATR OF THE PLAN
“Wait, no, why?”
“I’ll give her… your number!”
No- no, that’s not-
“No, don’t actually, I want to-”
“Well, Becky, since you’re too chicken to ask her for her number herself, you don’t get to do your dumb plan or whatever. And, sent!”
NO
“You didn’t actually, did you?”
“Why don’t you look down?”
I looked down at my phone. I felt it buzz.
Becky?
Oh, no. (Also, notice the transition again? Two spaces in between each line- it makes sense. Just, two spaces between lines means texting. Unless I can figure something smart out… uh, ignore that…)
129Please respect copyright.PENANAvT8QpCUMHy
Hi?
Hi
129Please respect copyright.PENANAxKqF6xEt76
BOOM FIRST TEXT WITH CAITLYN I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF
“Becky, look down again!”
Anna was still talking to me. I looked down.
It was a gif of two people kissing. Anna started laughing.
“ANNA!”
“Haha!”
I looked down at my phone again. There was a text from Caitlyn.
129Please respect copyright.PENANAU7zTl2MRbs
Lol you look so dumb
HEY NO I DO NOT!
Lol yes you do
129Please respect copyright.PENANADJzGIW5FC1
I looked up from my phone. Caitlyn was laughing. I screamed.
I hate phones. But know what I hate more than phones? Girls.129Please respect copyright.PENANA69IPc8WspX