Episode 11 Finale - Her Butler, Careless
“How DARE you speak for me like that?!” I yelled as Sebastian, and I sat in the limousine together. “That was UNFORGIVABLE!”
“My deepest apologizes, master,” Sebastian said, bowing despite us both sitting down. “I just thought it better if you were with me.”
“Well, you could’ve ASKED me first!” I snapped. “That was insulting! No servant should do such a thing!”
He gazed up then, eyes dark. “We need to investigate further, my lord. And it might be better if you—”
“Sebastian, you know how I feel about places like this,” I said then, eyes narrowing. “This is unforgivable. Insulting. Rubbish! Let alone the fact that I need to investigate and getting into an acting show is only going to set me back!”
“Master, if I may intrude,” his voice grew stern, “in order to investigate further without earning suspicion. You must be a worker, not a customer. If you want to go into the worker’s lounge without earning odd looks, you must be a worker, not a customer.”
I settled back into my seat then, growling low.
He just watched me with dark eyes. “You know I’m right.”
“That still doesn’t excuse your behavior,” I said then, eyes narrowing.
He just bowed again. “No, it does not, and I apologize. You are right, I should’ve asked you first rather than intruding. I shall make it up to you, master. I swear on it.”
I just made an impatient sound and gazed out the window.
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“Master, are you alright?” Sebastian said as he finished buttoning my night shirt. “You look a tad pale.”
I gazed up at him then. “I’m fine. Just… annoyed about the circumstances.”
He watched me for a moment, clearly knowing I was hiding something, and I was.
But he let it go and stood. “What would you like me to do, my lord? Stay or go?”
I was quiet for a moment. “Stay.”
He smiled a little. “Even though you’re not particularly happy with me?”
I narrowed my eyes. “I gave an answer, so stop pressing further.”
He just bowed. “At once, my lord.”
He then lightly shrugged off his tailcoat and set it aside, kicking off his shoes, and getting in the sheets with me seconds later.
I just laid down as he pulled the covers higher over me, and I stared at his chest when he adjusted my pillow, so it was fluffed around my neck correctly.
We lay about a foot apart, which I didn’t particularly mind right now.
At least he was there.
Sebastian just leaned over the nightstand and blew out his lantern, covering the room in a sudden darkness.
I just continued staring at his chest, feeling the ice inside me swell.
We were silent for a couple minutes.
“Master, I can see your mark glowing in the darkness,” Sebastian said then. “Your eyes are open. Close them.”
“You don’t tell me what to do,” I said then, rolling away from him and facing the window. “I am your master, remember that.”
He was silent then.
I just continued staring off into space.
“Do you need something to ease your mind?” Sebastian said then. “Warm milk, perhaps?”
“I already had warm milk.”
“I can make another one.”
“I’m fine.”
He was silent again, and I was too.
“Master…” Sebastian said then, voice soft, “what troubles you?”
I narrowed my eyes. “Nothing.”
“You’re a bad liar.”
“I know,” I said then, the cold swelling deeper, “and I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
He was silent again, and I was too.
This quietness lasted for a couple minutes, however.
And I was the one who broke it:
“Sebastian.”
“Yes, my lord?” His voice was soft, as if he didn’t want to startle me with a sudden noise.
“Do you seriously think I’m bound to the same fate as Ciel?” I said then, voice soft. “My life is torture and pain and… darkness…?”
“Every soul suffers pain, master,” Sebastian said then. “Yours is cursed to suffer the most horrible pain. So, yes, I would say you have the same fate as Ciel, but that’s not a bad thing.”
“Why is that?”
“Because after we completed the contract,” Sebastian explained, “Ciel lived a happy and joyful life. He did not suffer ever again, and that’s because his soul usually doesn’t life past the trauma. And yours will, too.”
“Why?” I said then.
“Because you signed with me,” he said then.
My lashes lowered.
“Ciel signing the contract with a separate entity corrupted his fate. His fate was sealed to me, and his soul had to reconstruct its path. To a lighter one, if that. And yes, he did die, but he was ready to. He had a very happy life, something I would wish upon all the bodies his soul took in.”
I was quiet for a moment. “I signed with you.”
“Indeed, you did,” he said then. “There’s always a light at the end of the tunnel, master, you just have to keep walking until you reach it.”
I stared at my eye’s reflection in the mirror. “Sebastian… is just belonging to you the only thing you’re getting out of the contract?”
“It’s more than belonging to me, my lord,” he said then. “Your soul belongs to me. Now, I can choose to eat it or protect it, and I chose to protect it. But it still belongs to me.”
“I still don’t see what you’re getting out of this.”
“It may seem odd, master,” Sebastian said then. “But many demons do not get the privilege of having a soul belong to them without eating it. Humans cherish having their own children, their jobs, their lives… demons… demons have lesser things to cherish. Because many things for humans are nothing to us. When we have a soul that belongs to us entirely, we are guaranteed happiness.”
“Why me?” I said then.
“Why not you?”
“You picked me because my soul smells good.”
He chuckled a little. “Yes, indeed. But I’d rather live your entire life with you rather than ending it early… just for a meal.”
“Don’t you crave it, though?” I said then.
“Indeed, the craving is there, but it’s not a bad craving, master. It’s a small craving. And I am happy with other lowly souls.”
I stared off into space then, breaths softening. “You were right earlier.”
“Master?” he said then.
“I do fear you,” I said then, though he remained quiet, “I fear you greatly, but… I also find comfort in you. It’s odd.”
“Master, I’m a demon. Nothing is odd.”
“Did Ciel feel the same?” I asked him.
“Indeed, he did.”
“Is it the same reason? Because you have my life in your hands, and you can crush it in seconds? If you changed your mind, I can die right here? But you are the only living being that knows what happened to me? The only being in existence? The only one who… understands?”
“Indeed,” Sebastian said then, voice soft, “he felt the exact same.”
I was quiet for a moment. “How much did he mean to you?”
Sebastian remained silent, as if he didn’t know how to answer the question.
But after a moment, he replied, “Everything. He meant everything to me.”
“And he… is me?”
“He is you, yes.”
“So I…?”
“Mean everything to me,” he said then, “yes, my lord.”
“You could kill me,” I said then.
“I won’t.”
“But you can,” I said then.
“Yes, I can.”
“You could kill me right here and right now. This second. End my life. Take my soul. Kill me and fill that craving and be so satisfied.”
“Indeed, I can,” he said then, the red in his eyes glowing the room, “but I won’t.”
“But you won’t,” I echoed.
“Yes, master.”
I just continued staring at our reflections. “My life is twisted.”
He chuckled then. “Indeed, it is, my young lord. Now, you must go to sleep. We have a big day tomorrow.”
I just let my lashes fall, listening to him within seconds.
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