Dear grieving son/daughter,
Losing a parent is hard, one of the hardest things in the world. I should know, because my father passed away when I was only seven, and to this day I still miss him. People may say that it gets easier, and in some ways it does, but many of you will see the truth behind it, the fact that it doesn't necessarily get easier, but you learn to cope. Sometimes the pain can be overwhelming, sometimes a dull ache, and other times it seems to vanish.
Many people in the world seem to think you should just get over it, but they aren't the one who just lost their mom or dad. They don't understand the pain, confusion, numbness, sadness, or overwhelming despair that are just some of the things you can feel from the loss of a parent. They've never woke up in the morning and run downstairs to tell their father something only to remember he's been gone two months now. They haven't had to cry themselves to sleep because the tears refuse to stop. They don't have to hear everyone say how sorry they are for your loss, as if sorry fixes things, because it doesn't. It doesn't bring them back, and it doesn't take away the pain. 589Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQtGoO6BwQ
It's okay to grieve, and it's your right to grieve. We all go through different stages of grief and it affects each of us differently. One thing is the same, and that is the pain. Maybe you were closer to the parent who passed than you were to the other. Or maybe your last conversation with them had been a huge fight, or maybe, like me, you didn't get the chance to say goodbye.
Grief counseling may help, but for some it provide no help at all. You may be fine one minute, then their favorite song comes on the radio. The date of their death, your parents anniversary, their birthday are among some of the dates that may trigger the grief. Holidays and special occasions may have you wishing they were with you, or wondering if he/she is proud of who you are. You may miss their advise, the way they smiled, or worse you may begin to forget all the details. You may find your mind can't picture their crooked smile the way it used to, or can't remember the way their voice sounds exactly without the help of videos. It's normal, but other people may not understand that.589Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3Thx6SQ6r
If you believe in some sort of heaven or afterlife you may find relief with the belief that they are in a better place, or perhaps you can get a bit of peace of mind knowing that they aren't hurting anymore. Most likely though, you feel as if it isn't fair. Other people still have both their parents, why should your be the one to pass away.
Keep going on, day for day, because that is what your mom or dad would want you to do. Though it's hard not to cry, remind yourself that they wouldn't want you to cry over them, but remember all the good memories. Live in their memory, grow a memory garden, make something dedicated in their honor, or visit an old vacation spot or favorite spot of theirs in their honor. But keep going on, because it will become more bearable as time goes on. Until then, surround yourself with those who love you and things that give you comfort. Some may try to turn to alcohol or drugs to numb the pain, but it isn't the best option, so don't do that. Because when you come down from that high, or reach the bottom of that bottle, it won't bring your parent back, and in the end it's only a temporary fix that may cause more harm than good. You want to honor their memory, cherish it, not throw it away.589Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUfaP8SHoEm
And, if it becomes too unbearable, visit their final resting place, if possible. You may find comfort talking to them as if they were still around. Or find someone who understands what you are going through, the two of you may be able to help each other. And, remember you're never alone, because their are people out there who understand what you are going through, who knows all to well the pain of losing a parent.You will get through this, so stay strong. Ever cloud runs out of rain, and depending on what you believe, goodbye doesn't mean forever. I understand the pain, and so do many others.
Stay Strong, all this will pass,
Rose
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