6/3/2019160Please respect copyright.PENANA2tisUbsMhK
160Please respect copyright.PENANARqt1rVTQ00
I just realized finals is already at my doorstep but my body is not ready yet. I don't remember half of what I learned at uni because it's not interesting at all and I just hate most of my professors because their scumbags. It's like their all plotting for their students to fail. I'm still a second year but I am more hopeless than a fish out of water. Maybe it's because my attention span is much less than a goldfish or I just can't deny that this course wasn't my choice. Becoming a nurse could be the worst choice I've ever done for my family but if I do pass this and also the NCLEX, I guess my life would be so much better and I could move out. But then again, I will just be more depressed than ever because I will be stuck at a job that makes real dough but I have to live with anxiety because a patient can die from anything! I am the most imperfect person ever and I commit mistakes more than the devil, maybe not that much but I'm dangerously bad at being serious so, SO FUCK ME!... Actually, it's not that bad. I still get decent grades. Like, I could have gotten a scholarship but it's a good thing they miss counted the slots. I mean, it would have helped but I would have to get up earlier and be a part of some sort of cult just to maintain my nerdiness. That is what I am trying to avoid because it already happened in high school and I also got bullied for being an immigrant. Well, group study is cool but exposure is cooler. But if I become a total bookworm, not really, just somewhat of a know it all, I would have been stuck at the library or at the grounds or at the dorm or at the round table of hopeful scholars and limit what I can experience while I'm still 21. Because nursing is about grinding gears and not running the wheels, I preach. Well actually, most of my peers do have a life beyond school so I might be very wrong but I really do think that the system is problematic. People should experience shit more and not just comprehend the majority of it. Like I am not even sure if everything I learned at uni will be useful in the future. Or maybe I am just very bored and tired that's why I just saying incoherent bs. But my point here is, or maybe the truth about the situation is, I am sick of studying and doing stuff that I will never be happy about. I just want to dance and be so drunk I don't remember why I was naked.160Please respect copyright.PENANA4P49w86pUY