6/7/2019122Please respect copyright.PENANATaEf90icvI
First of all, I just want to state that this will be the last entry of my diary- diary because I now accept it for what it is. This will be the last one because I think it is not good to remember bad memories or experiences. Of course you can learn from them but I think I won't heal from this one. Many things happened today that it felt like a mixture of a pretty good dream and a horrendous nightmare. But I can't wake up nor I can change the situation so I can only hope that I can forget about this day. So, after my classes, I was already feeling overwhelmed or excited about performing and getting that job at the club. When I arrived at my room, my roommate told me that Raymond left somethin in the closet. It was the suit and I didn't really check it yesterday so it was today that I found it's a versace. This should have been a sign because Raymond never let's me touch him when he's wearing versace but now he's giving it to me like charity. I looked too posh for the bus so I used what's left in my pocket and took a taxi to the club. It was friday so the club was jam-packed with customers and dancers. I saw Scott from the stage but he was too busy so I wasn't able to say HI and I wasn't really able to talk to him that night because one of the bouncer grabbed my arm and took me to the owner's office. His office had too much neon lights that it almost blinded me when I came in and he also had vintage furniture so I made sure I sat properly because I didn't want to damage anything. Mr. Butters was relaxing on his big boss chair and he's smokin weed like usual. It felt casual so I didn't get that nervous at first until he left his chair to sit next to me at the couch. At first, he was very formal. He asked about my previous job and about uni. Then he asked about my sexual experiences. I lied and told him that I'm a closethed gay and joining the club will make me feel free to express myself and accept myself more. The only truth that I told him was that my parents are strict and their religious so they will never like me doin this but they can't control my life forever so I'm there, tryin to get this cool ass job. He liked my background and he might have liked me too much because he sat even closer to me. But nothing happen eventually, it just got weird because he asked me if I believe in fairytales. Like if I believe on the existence of sirens and nymphs. It was beyond what I expected like I expected to be molested but he asked that, so I told him that I somehow do because anything can happen in reality. He gave a toast to that and he told me that he only accepts beings such as that to work in his club to be sure about profit. This man was strange but it got a lot weird when he told me that I'm different because I look like a incubus. That guy was clearly higher than a space station so I just went along and agreed that he is right. I am an incubus and I want nothing more than sex and the demise of men. His eyes went really wide before he started laughing like a hyena. Then he admitted that he has been watching me for quite sometime and he thinks that I've got what it takes to be one of the best dancers but he's doubting my potential since he knows I'm a virgin. I don't know why being a virgin will effect my job but he might have thought that I'm a bit too innocent. I proved him wrong by saying that I will get fucked sooner than later and if he thinks I don't know how to act like a horny or kinky bitch, he should have called the oscars to confirm it. He liked my attitude and I was really happy about that, that I swear I saw dark spots in my vision. After that, we only had a friendly conversation. I think he was just showin me that he just looks scary but his personality is great so I should just focus on my job. The successful interview only took fifteen minutes and I wanted to brag about it to my mom but I knew she would hate me for this one so I only watched Scott dance a bit just to celebrate. I didn't take a shot though it would have helped on what happened next. It was like a bright and sunny moment before a terrible storm. That is because when I got out of the club's door, I SAW MY PARENT'S CAR AT THE PARKING LOT!!!! I don't know how they knew but before they could come near me and start screaming, I ran for my life. I ran as fast as I could and didn't look back. When I stopped to catch my breath, I was at uni. I thought they were too old to catch up but I underestimated them because my dad was ready to throw his phone at me. I ran to the dorms but I didn't go to my room. I went to Raymond's and since I went in without knocking, I've seen something I should not have seen; RAYMOND WAS WEARING THAT KINKY CHOKER! I said 'what the hell' as silent as I could before he told me to get out. I asked him 'why' since he told me to visit him after the interview. He told me that it was not what he specifically requested because he wants to see me before the interview and he wants to drive me there. Well, it was my mistake because I'm forgetful as fuck. I said sorry but he turned his back on me and told me to leave in a serious tone. Then I told him the truth that I can't because I am hiding from my parents and they don't know about our friendship so I will be safe there. But he didn't roll his eyes this time and say something like 'don't ever do it again', he really told me to fuck off. I begged him and I was on my knees because I could hear my parents footsteps just outside the door. There he gave a very heavy sigh before he told me to stand up and put my back against the door. We were alone at that time since he's roommate might have joined an anime convention at some state. I would have been truly safe if his roommate was around but I was always unlucky. Because when I was at the door, he's hand was on the door knob and he said that he will definitely kick me out if I won't do as he says. Without thinkin about it, I stayed calm and rested my head at the door. He was towering over me, he was so close to me that I nearly vomited because of his strong cologne. And there is nothin funny with what happened next. He told me to put my arms around his shoulder and kiss him. I'm not sure if he really liked me that way but I just followed immediately because I didn't want to get caught. So, we were making out while my parents are talking to the dorm president at the hallway just a bit far from Raymond's room. And the president was more than ready to calm them and usher them out since it's pass bedtime. But my parents were persistent and they talked about the situation for more than forever but Raymond's hands were already on my ass and he's squeezin them like pizza dough so I got distracted and the voices were gone. But it was still not safe so I didn't let go but Raymond stopped and he put my arms back to my sides then he told me that I didn't close my eyes. He said that he's had enough of me and he is really tired about it so he threatened to go out and call my parent's attention. I really don't know why he was really that angry that night so I just said sorry repeatedly and I told him that I will do whatever he wants as long as I don't have to face my parents tonight. He liked that idea and I really have outdone myself this time. He told me that he wants to suck my dick and he wants me to watch him as intensely as when he is birdwatching. It came full circle and I wasn't ready for the train-wreck but I let him do it nonetheless. But before that, he removed his clothes and connected a chain to his collar. He told me that I can pull it if I wanted him to choke. I think that was his kink and I just pretended that it wasn't real. I was expecting to him to be controlling and dominant in a relationship or at the bed but when I saw him on his knees and lickin my dick to get hard, I realized that I'm wrong most of the time. I wanted to look at him as he do it since that is what he wants but my head fell back as he took all of me inside his mouth like a delicious popsicle on a hot summer noon. He was so good that I was moaning and I started grabbing his hair mindlessly. I haven't masturbated in a while so I ended fucking his wet hot mouth like I was trying to kill him with my cock. He liked it apparently because he was crying and he was touching himself while I was on the edge. I wanted to cum but I din't want to do it in his mouth so I suddenly pulled out. That made him really angry that he stood up and hold the door knob again. I was able to stop him immediately because I aligned his long and hard thing on mine and I started pumping both of us. I told him that I want to be pleasured by his dick since it's my first time with a man. I didn't want to do it in his mouth because he's special to me. He believed me like a lunatic and just seconds later, we started making out again then we ruined the versache suit. After catching our breath, he said that I can leave anytime I want and then he went to bed naked. When I arrived at my room, I think I had a mental breakdown and I could not see anything clearly because of my tears but I think I calmed down after grabbing this damn notebook and writing about it.122Please respect copyright.PENANAG0zzfOSJYf