Hi, it's me again. Don't worry I haven't dropped this thing just yet I just didn't really have anything to write about and no interest to do it. Speaking of interest: I lose interest in a lot of things real fast for example I once bought a new video game and really enjoyed it and I played and played and played it basically for 1 week straight. But after that week I barely play it anymore and only have small phases where I just take a peek into it... I also notice that with manga. I sometimes find some real amazing manga that I really love and read till like 1 or 2 am before a school day cause it is so good and I just can't stop. Only to on the next day never touch it again... I experience something like that reguraly like once or twice a month... It can be really frustrating especially if I feel like I finally discovered what job I wanted to do I tell everyone about it and then I just fall off or forget. For example if you'd ask me what my dream job was 2-3 years ago I would definetly have said pilot... But now... I imagine myself being a pilot... I do find it kinda cool but I don't real feel like it's worth the effort and cost... I have just lost interest... 42Please respect copyright.PENANAb8FD22CXah
It is definelty more of a me problem but I never understood how people can go about doing routines for days, months, years or even decades. I mean yes I am doing a routine of going to school for now but every year there is a major change of going to a different class, there are a lot of holidays and more. But a working job... the same thing for decades? To be honest I don't know if I'll survive that... I mean sure the first month will be really cool if I am lucky the first year as well. But as I've already said I lose interest real fast. If I do something like a job reguraly every day my interest in that subject is just gonna evaporate I feel like. In that case I at least feel like I differ from most people. Cause it seems like most people have some kind of ambition, motivation or drive. But I just don't have any of those... Except maybe not dying, moving to Japan and reading books... Those are like the only dreams I have... And that is probably the reason why I believe I am apathetic.. I just don't really care since I don't really have anything I want... And as I've said before since I believe I am Aromantic that doesn't help either since it just removed my drive to get a family of my own. I may not make sense at all to some people here but this is just how I feel and what I wanted to write about today... I hope I won't lose the interest to write this thing to fast cause I do enjoy it I guess... Have a nice day and hope to see you soon!
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