Eli throws himself back in his chair, one hand to his head and the other limp across the chair’s arm. The box falls out of his grip and clatters on the wooden floor. His grandmother’s ring pops out of the box and skitters away from him. The diamonds taunt him in the moonlight.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgVKuG2nyo
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjzTZETuQE
“We can’t do this,” Mari said gently, curling his hand over the ring.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ87xmqcQyUc
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsV0tcAqfA
The memory makes him shudder. Good thing he did it alone rather than in a crowded location as he was originally planning to.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡix7Tg3PZtl
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrdvEHHTlVa
“I love you,” he said.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAAbQX7b0LI
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5yv8ZyNOl
“I love you too.” She stared at the flame of the candle between them. “But…how can we get married when you aren’t old enough to drink at your own bachelor party? Are we supposed to pop open a bottle of apple cider?”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMVtUf6OQhd
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHO7nO8fsU
“I didn’t know drinking was that important to you,” he said stiffly, running his pinky along the rim of his water glass.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc7iCAl49pf
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5CRhI9uyG
“It isn’t that,” Mari said. “It’s what being able to drink represents.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaGDdF5G1Z
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhbvYT2PE5X
“And what’s that?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t helping his case by sounding like a petulant child.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZq2oRQzay
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkd6Jt0yHMA
“That you’re an adult,” she said, reaching across the table to put a hand to his cheek. “Which you aren’t yet.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2lGczOHB1q
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6m5eHkJKaP
“That’s not what you said last night,” Eli muttered.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXKxlb5egFq
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YC6vODGQe
She shot him a look and her smile melted away. “I love you, Eli. You know that. But we can’t get married. At the very least, we can’t get married right now.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCelWfUwRk
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5HYXKnToay
The table is still set for dinner, even though Mari has long since left. The ice in her water glass has melted. He can still smell the candle wax.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NxaEgXd4B
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4CaAO6Z5e
Mari wanted to go to the Epik High concert even more than Eli did. Or rather, Eli wanted to go but had to accept the fact that he couldn’t afford to do everything while studying full-time and working part-time at the university bookstore. But Mari wanted to do everything.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOju369Jkz2
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMFJTfnHFQq
“I can’t go to the concert,” he told her.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPymlcRDIBw
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdzwXhdxa17
She bought him a ticket anyway, telling him, “It isn’t a big deal.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiDRUhljsVq
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGbUbMsOHpH
It’s always been like that. She casually buys him a ticket to something and doesn’t think twice about it. For him, however, each event she pays for becomes a brick on his back. He can’t imagine she’s as fine with it as she seems to be.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ732iSR47HM
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4y8kIRhfCF
He has never been sure what bothers him more—being a burden on her or the fact that she isn’t honest about how she feels, that she pretends it’s okay that she has to keep paying for him.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVz6kffLwnS
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡozMlkXVOi0
Eli gets up, leaving the ring where it is on the floor and goes out to the balcony. He leans his forearms on the cold metal railing and leans forward, staring up at the sky. His favorite thing about living in a college town is that he can actually see the stars—especially since his apartment is at the top of the hill.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5MIONz3rDf
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXKz9DZ7drZ
He drops his gaze down toward the school and can even see Bell Hall, the building with the lab where Mari works. There are some lights on, although he’s fairly certain Mari isn’t there right now. She’s probably soaking in a hot bath—probably reading to calm her nerves after rejecting Eli’s proposal.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoAaPUiJpPs
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsm6SnO305
He grips the railing and leans back, eyes turned upward again. The night breeze pushes his hair off his forehead.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7cKSCXLmS3
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnltWaAlcCV
He went to the lab with her once, but only once. Mari had needed to stop by and start an experiment before they headed out on a date. He had trailed in after her, wanting to see what she did and just wanting to be in her presence.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxUqJ3ZKVFa
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8VkKrNBP7
One of her coworkers stopped by to talk to her and glanced at Eli questioningly.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQ70aKXaKh
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8abDktv8pb
“Alan, this is my boyfriend, Eli,” Mari said.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM4rnB1FjQY
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0LUxeo6aF
“So, Eli, what do you do?” Alan said as they shook hands.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4iLtIzCgNd
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsF3E5G5IWh
“Are you really going to pester my boyfriend right now?” Mari said, taking Eli’s arm and tried to pull him away.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YRq8lCP7p
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxbjXVr9dB
“Pester him? I’m just trying to be polite,” Alan said. “Is his job top secret or something?”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXONefUIvtg
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6jmj9XAGhu
Mari’s lips were pressed together. Clearly she had never told her coworkers she’d met her boyfriend while she was a graduate student T.A. for his undergrad biochem class.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dmB0utw0i
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe3VssK2DNh
“I’m a student,” Eli said, suddenly wanting to leave the lab and head out to their movie.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKh6Hvwy12
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SZVgcrZvi
“PhD? What do you study?” Alan said.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYn8tE8zfu8
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOrmLECiK8g
“No, not a PhD student,” Eli said, his neck and cheeks starting to heat up. He couldn’t meet Mari’s gaze.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk76tMvoEsT
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4l8Dzziak
“Oh, Master’s then?” 751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAVrpoHjUs
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2O6Wyk6aNm
“Actually, I’m an undergrad,” Eli said.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPEonIOcql
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcDWq1eMRz
“Oh.” Alan looked at Mari and then back at Eli. “Well, it was good to meet you, man.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNUBy4lppWO
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtScJBLCWX4
Eli followed Mari in silence. He could feel something like embarrassment or shame rising off of her, but she turned around and placed a hand on his forearm, forcing a gentle smile.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMVKB1LhbB
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkCjbiCBew
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “This is just because of your age. One day, you’ll catch up to me—maybe even pass me—and it won’t matter. We’ll forget there was ever a time like this.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG1UhzA60lx
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTlAzlmSrVp
Eli sighs. Crickets chirp in time with the twinkling of the stars. As he stares up absently, a giant meteor falls. He watches it streak across the sky, getting brighter and brighter and brighter until the blazing light fills the sky, fills his vision, fills his mind.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmQBON2kuw
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKz7SaaOY1l
He blinks. He’s in the living room of an apartment. There are no lights on, and the time reads 2:57 a.m. on a digital clock with green numbers—just around the time he was standing outside. 751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEi7nrbdH96
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYzS7KxEkL
He realizes with surprise that there’s something in his hand. It’s a piece of a rock. He would think it’s a dream, but the rock smells like metal and fire. It’s warm. Eli brings it to his face. 751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPnrDnItr8
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwvDuFn4Ey
He doesn’t see how it’s possible, but he wonders if it’s a part of a meteor—maybe the meteor he just saw.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3fH8GKDf2N
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsuPUMqVdJX
He surveys the apartment. It’s bland and undecorated, but the wooden dining table seems ready to splinter under the weight of open textbooks and notebooks. A closed MacBook charges, precariously close to a half-finished mug of coffee. Eli leans forward and looks at the notebook, immediately recognizing the handwriting.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3bq5X4AB70
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHB8igC50Qj
It isn’t possible.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKIG17Vk3Mr
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8xnIc7gLKq
He glances toward a closed door that he assumes is a bedroom and makes his way over warily, quietly pushing it open. There’s a bed on the other side, up against the wall. Moonlight streams directly upon the sleeping form. Her back is turned, and even if it weren’t for the dark hair ribboning across the pillow, he still would have recognized her.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBjIB08q7OZ
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYnCb7CrEc
He creeps closer—she’s a notoriously light sleeper—and takes a better look. She shifts in her sleep slightly, as though she can sense she has a visitor. And then he sees her face. Mari looks pretty much the same as she did when he saw her a few hours ago, only more vulnerable. There are streaks of lavender in her hair, starting at her scalp and traveling out. Her bangs are shorter, settling on her closed eyelids. There’s still a hint of baby softness that hasn’t yet melted away to reveal the sultry cheekbones in the Mari he loves.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSBsjiaBeo
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsr1qY2N1A0
Eli presses a button on her phone, illuminating the screen, to see the date. Five years ago to the day.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡReMi5r1VPY
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2nh4Tdo0ns
If this is right, if this isn’t a dream of some sort, he’s seeing her when she was the same age as he is now. He looks at the meteor, still in his hand. He isn’t sure how he knows this, but he’s suddenly sure the meteor was his ticket here and will be his ticket back to his year.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGMTQUoeN1
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAjcNTPxqm
But he has an idea. Now that he’s here, why not stay? He’ll age with her, and she will no longer be five years older than him. He’ll make it work, somehow—find a way to survive as a twenty-year-old in this year, stage a run-in with her. She’ll fall in love with him again, but they’ll be on equal ground.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlg9jWUSCnS
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0yOso8Hwj
Sliding the little meteor piece into his pocket, he takes a deep breath, excitement mounting at the thought of starting again with her at the same age—even if she is still a month older. They’ll have five more years together than they would have otherwise.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFQf9YJtIad
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMSqyqKC8Ok
“Is this really want you want?” Mari asked him multiple times, a shrewd look on her face. “With me five years older than you, you do realize things might need to happen five years faster than you want them to, right?”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZIJc78uHRr
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIcLFR5PkJu
“Like what?” he said.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡagMMx5c3J4
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7goSxzKnae
“Getting married, having kids,” she said.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡapPCjZLv5x
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4iL7ZJOLXJ
“Well, good thing you warned me about it now,” Eli said. “Now I’m mentally prepared.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0jYnCkmqu
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTb4XiGsPyq
“Seriously, though,” she said. “Don’t you want someone your age?”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gWk0XT45t
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0LsMrWacJN
Eli sits cross-legged on the floor beside her bed, deflating instantly. If he stays here isn’t he finding someone his own age. He told her he didn’t care about their age difference. And he doesn’t, really. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, feeling a little dizzy as if he just got off a rollercoaster.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqccfNKZfw
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiRM5W15YK
“I can’t believe you’ve never ridden a rollercoaster before,” Eli said.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1F6n163YO
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZtpEPApsvQ
Mari gripped his hand, her nails digging into his skin. Her eyes were wide, focused on the car that sped by thunderously. The riders’ screams seemed to hover in the air behind them.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ87Lk8yDDwi
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmijFEZpwZ
“Well,” she said. “I guess this is all part of our goal of making new memories together.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN19xo8BzvH
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV6LFrxZ8CG
This Mari sleeping in front of him doesn’t have that memory of riding the rollercoaster with him. She doesn’t have any of the memories they’ve created over the past two years. The situation would be unbalanced with him knowing her soul even as she tries to discover his.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNfP3zNkcr
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTf97206nnN
Eli takes the meteor out of his pocket. It seems like it’s getting warmer. He stands up and looks at her again, a little sad at the thought of a future that can never be. Taking his chance, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead, just above her left eyebrow. Even five years ago, she used the smell shampoo she uses in the present.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdO7IfqN5kW
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAGEVZxSK7e
Mari stretches and blinks blearily at him. He knows she was almost blind pre-LASIK. This Mari can barely see anything without her glasses or contacts. He must be just a blonde-haired outline to her, too indistinct for her to even tell he’s Korean under that blonde hair.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwQrjgFFhPm
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOlCLqQM9Mn
“Who are you?” she murmurs.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZSMrZPGMS
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwaaRXRxDj
He thinks about it for a moment and speaks softly to keep from waking her up completely. “I’m someone you haven’t met yet—someone you’ll meet in the future and fall in love with, but not quite as deeply as I’ll fall in love with you.”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOsqqMuzif8
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv99pTFJO8S
“Why?” Her voice is still groggy, eyes half-closed.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGG7XTsfQz0
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcr4N5YT7Km
“Because I’m younger than you,” Eli says, gently putting a finger to her cheek. “It’ll bother you, and I think you won’t believe me when I say just how much I love you. But I love you, and only you, and especially you when you’re five years older than me. Don’t forget it, okay?”751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFm4gmLxgr
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCKqNb0SVL
He holds his pinky out to her. She curves her own pinky around his. Her skin is almost as warm as the meteor.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTw3tiiUNgn
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgUDMIeIaEr
“Okay.” Her voice is nearly gone now as she sinks back into sleep.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuWhYisAJy
751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorO1nktKtB
He holds the meteor in his palm as it burns more fiercely, watching this Mari and thinking about the Mari waiting for him back in his present.751Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGNOX0zE7u
Penana
search
Loginarrow_drop_down
Registerarrow_drop_down
