「去哪?」142Please respect copyright.PENANAKfGfjsIuFl
142Please respect copyright.PENANA6ZNKcwqyxt
「急事。」142Please respect copyright.PENANAE3pKfzN0Ek
142Please respect copyright.PENANA4Nbumd48Za
「你不吃晚餐?」142Please respect copyright.PENANANnFXpIQI5k
142Please respect copyright.PENANAqEldFVi2Gm
我沒應答,逕自出門。142Please respect copyright.PENANALk9dNjpgvR
142Please respect copyright.PENANAczgkrx5orO
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手,不協調感令我忐忑不安。142Please respect copyright.PENANAmh14j3ShAj
142Please respect copyright.PENANAlaAGUfKBng
難以言喻的鬱悶。142Please respect copyright.PENANAhpVF4rFd1V
142Please respect copyright.PENANACrm7fXTWNp
長嘆。142Please respect copyright.PENANAvXG7Mi2NQY
142Please respect copyright.PENANAMFpLJKWTQ3
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。142Please respect copyright.PENANAr0ns6UuzXJ
142Please respect copyright.PENANADiJrvElX0c
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品,熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按,然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉,過目即忘。142Please respect copyright.PENANAVkPevySSwr
142Please respect copyright.PENANAKNDqrrLHrk
「不需要贈品?」她驀地抬眼,與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎?142Please respect copyright.PENANAe6YLcvdKCC
142Please respect copyright.PENANAu0E78heZCc
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口,連忙接過香菸和肉乾。142Please respect copyright.PENANAlrCzVNszx2
142Please respect copyright.PENANA7w4Pj9JeJC
她假笑,沒再搭理我,拿起抹布四處抹。142Please respect copyright.PENANAafVXYqpOCd
142Please respect copyright.PENANAiGPKgJjpvb
我走出光線充足的便利店,重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。142Please respect copyright.PENANA3Dy8XykRGw
142Please respect copyright.PENANAcYMpNLO6x8
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑,另一種不安。142Please respect copyright.PENANA1MMMwvs6aC
142Please respect copyright.PENANA7n5K2TWQvv
櫥窗五光十色,路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序,不約而同在紅色燈號前止住,然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇,一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣,不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。142Please respect copyright.PENANA4z6sCc8yoI
142Please respect copyright.PENANAxW9OwLCaBs
心血來潮,我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。142Please respect copyright.PENANA3506xRER2m
142Please respect copyright.PENANAyNjgmI0oDl
污水,雜物,廚餘,鼠餌,坑渠。142Please respect copyright.PENANA32ywcc2jPs
142Please respect copyright.PENANAFm4nexYQfq
髒,亂,腐,毒,臭。142Please respect copyright.PENANA85STwz8Ihf
142Please respect copyright.PENANAnB1UgTS5Y8
為何要到這種地方來?不是捷徑,不知盡頭何處,不懷目的……142Please respect copyright.PENANAszT8WPIgJj
142Please respect copyright.PENANAJlL33jlvT8
小巷盡處是另一小巷,盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路,走又走。不停前行,像是正在找出口;絕不回頭,像是不打算找到真正出口。142Please respect copyright.PENANAfTX6kwalOm
142Please respect copyright.PENANAPWzKexHkDK
厭煩日常走過的路,不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去,其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇,實質一切已成定局。那是大街,這是小巷。大街在明,小巷在暗。大街繁華,小巷冷清。142Please respect copyright.PENANA4QS2Gznu5x
142Please respect copyright.PENANA1Osj48IyGg
註定的。142Please respect copyright.PENANAKw7fdiS6J1
142Please respect copyright.PENANAmLCn72SqKy
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼?我不相信,亦不願輕言不相信。142Please respect copyright.PENANARcL2mWqnp2
142Please respect copyright.PENANA4h2Ml5gpDv
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。142Please respect copyright.PENANA6PcDMa8PNe
142Please respect copyright.PENANAdSjBmvJOc6
停步。猶疑。142Please respect copyright.PENANA8OWgdFDeQK
142Please respect copyright.PENANABXTcPsrmYL
惻隱?慈悲?然後呢?根本沒有然後,因為我自顧不暇。142Please respect copyright.PENANACgwnOKCavm
142Please respect copyright.PENANAa6GF7LNGm7
轉身。142Please respect copyright.PENANAqoyVugyZu6
142Please respect copyright.PENANAWU4uWb6oSl
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。142Please respect copyright.PENANA1xMSTi2F5b
142Please respect copyright.PENANA5Tk4UO1xco
我回身走去。142Please respect copyright.PENANA4EvUh68mav
142Please respect copyright.PENANAN6bF2Ageyn
惻隱?慈悲?不,好奇罷。142Please respect copyright.PENANAxhkyQEHhiN
142Please respect copyright.PENANAG7h9FkL6EO
把小狗抱入懷內。142Please respect copyright.PENANAZ9akKgTLDE
142Please respect copyright.PENANAdezQ50h0rV
「暖和沒?」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。142Please respect copyright.PENANA1S3lZxiKwv
142Please respect copyright.PENANAfaEmletIrg
陣風從後疾過,寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。142Please respect copyright.PENANA4ep48yn0rm
142Please respect copyright.PENANAkL5dljBsWA
海風?海濱公園步道?142Please respect copyright.PENANAFZcy9I33l2
142Please respect copyright.PENANAciOXjanD8K
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答,但我需要溜達原因。142Please respect copyright.PENANA6ezMIA5yYw
142Please respect copyright.PENANAhJOjuQKj9n
多拐兩個彎,我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來,恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄,純淨,圓滿。142Please respect copyright.PENANAGb74S8A2Uy
142Please respect copyright.PENANASN1DvGGIrw
「看!這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。142Please respect copyright.PENANAOGVUl5ECLN
142Please respect copyright.PENANAMhm9lKKFbA
汪——牠回答,但沒有依指示抬頭。142Please respect copyright.PENANAK7ApvadiPZ
142Please respect copyright.PENANAUaQCrqvnYq
「找個好地方坐坐吧!」為免小狗中途跑掉,我微微拉下外套拉鏈,把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗,甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部,方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹:「乖。」142Please respect copyright.PENANAOuvvIYiUSi
142Please respect copyright.PENANAzmLKLBPxJi
銀月清冷,步道冷清,寧靜。心跳規律,呼吸有序,乏味。回憶很多,未知更多,迷惘。142Please respect copyright.PENANAbHlkxV3SqC
142Please respect copyright.PENANAJJbRA1XSW7
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller,跌了幾跤,膝蓋流血。明明怕血,明明怕痛,偏偏為保面子而強說無事,硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片,痛得要命,不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月,九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下,拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢,報答牠聽我發牢騷。142Please respect copyright.PENANAB0BDN5lWXW
142Please respect copyright.PENANAXIVKzG43ud
「留醫期間,我生氣朋友們不來探望我,打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後,我忙於學校課業,忘記致電他們,然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們,已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸,一吸一呼,虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了,無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過,不是說忘記就可以忘記。」142Please respect copyright.PENANA9OAwvwUqpO
142Please respect copyright.PENANACvvKDpS33D
記憶零碎,思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多,無奈腦袋運轉不來,沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。142Please respect copyright.PENANAl2syWaVAvG
142Please respect copyright.PENANAky1RtIpZlO
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味,舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊,甚至舔到小小鼻頭。142Please respect copyright.PENANAT1OiSPvD08
142Please respect copyright.PENANAUPFDBt4ED2
我笑,笑牠傻氣可愛。142Please respect copyright.PENANAEyrMD5GNUz
142Please respect copyright.PENANAmli81SH9S7
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。142Please respect copyright.PENANAp6mQxIbR4Y
142Please respect copyright.PENANAFAqj7OBhRC
鬱悶何來?142Please respect copyright.PENANATcDlDDdSdA
142Please respect copyright.PENANAbcz6i0B8cW
學業壓力?愛情煩惱?家庭不和?142Please respect copyright.PENANAdM85GUsXm4
142Please respect copyright.PENANAEOIDoaDRRM
也許統統都是,也許統統不是。142Please respect copyright.PENANAJCHyz3aAqg
142Please respect copyright.PENANA727MHvt6EB
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。142Please respect copyright.PENANA87bG30KJyu
142Please respect copyright.PENANAMQd4wyj1hN
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。142Please respect copyright.PENANAzqDCMXNKU6
142Please respect copyright.PENANA99u9NSRxHq
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。142Please respect copyright.PENANA6eTj9xohcj
142Please respect copyright.PENANAWIWN3ygVUH
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼,我彈走菸屁股,將牠從懷裡抽出,來個深深擁抱。142Please respect copyright.PENANArM6LimdRXL
142Please respect copyright.PENANAehOL08mRdP
然後呢?根本沒有然後。142Please respect copyright.PENANAhEs6dLCPS5
142Please respect copyright.PENANAwqU5KrEwYA
我輕輕放下小狗,動身邁步離開。142Please respect copyright.PENANAomUJd94irH
142Please respect copyright.PENANAAFTx5cAPCU
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾,自然而然不會跟上來。142Please respect copyright.PENANAZ8tr6eYMS3
註:此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
ns 172.69.6.23da2