Jesters entertain Ober just as much theatrical people like this charlatan does. Even though he already knows the answer to “Who sent you?”, the charlatan answers in a way that he expects---theatrical and absurdly foolish. Even the birds perching on the carriage window ledge laughs in high pitches,
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“That who has sent me is myself~ Thank you~” The charlatan says, sipping tea because he got jealous earlier of Ober being the only one sipping a cup of tea.
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“Think the way you want to think and I might bring you in as my personal jester”
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“OH!? Did age get to you already? What are you climbing on right now? SIXTY?”
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“One thousand six hundred”
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“One tho—lies”
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“Your totally opposite of my previous guest but both of you are quick to conclusions.”
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“NO WAY ARE YOU A THOUSAND-YEAR-OLD!?” Rubbing his eyes, “You must be an undead! Or a necromancer!?” GASP HE GOES, “Yo—you’re a monster! PLANNING TO INFILTRATE THE CAPITAL!” He turns to slam the wall behind Isaac, “CARRIAGE DRIVER! STOP IMMEDIATELY AT ONCE I COMMAND YOU!”
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“Lord Magister, a letter for you” Isaac says, sliding in the letter through the wooden panel. Ober takes the letter while the charlatan sticks his lips into the slit hole, puckering and plump for Isaac and shouting at the boy to stop. But Isaac does not, looking over his shoulder so that he can close the panel but that puckered plump lips…disgustingly lewd that he slams the wooden panel at it, causing the charlatan to scream chickens.
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Meanwhile Ober is reading a letter that came from House Sanguiris, reading:
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“Lord Magister Ober Vanderhawk,
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This is the last letter. I finished sending invites. The servants are doing well. And I am good.
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But the Head Servant wants me to extend to the other nation. What should I do? I told him to do what should be done, and maybe he sent them. Pick a venue that is not inside that cesspool capital. I hate cramp places. And, this is a personal request if you want for more entertainment, LaughingKnights Tavern is where you should go. I command you to go, lord magister. Invite them, for you and for me.
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you again for your service, Lord Magister
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“May the stars guide your path,” --- Says the head servant
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Sol Sanguiris
High Princess of Kinguin”
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The LaughingKnights—Ober has never heard of them but he still writes it on sites he has to visit. Ah, and since he does not know, maybe this charlatan does. “Say…” Ober turns his head for the charlatan but meets the knights’ behind being choked and figured voluptuously by his hose. And the lord magister cannot help but spank it, “Hey”
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Which the charlatan starts kicking his legs as if he enjoyed it, but his screaming draws the magister to the sliding panel. His face up close and---Ah…his lips got stuck.
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Ober asks Isaac to let the poor charlatan go which the boy does so. Facing this unlucky theatric whose made his behind indecently greet the magister—his lips are apple red and plump fully with purple bruise on the sides. “What do you want?” He says sulkily with tears streaming down his cheeks, saying that his face is ruined.
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“Look at me first”
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Which the charlatan does not do at first but the lord magister takes his chin and forces themselves to look in the eyes. Uttering silent words, Ober turns this charlatan into a peacock. “COOCK!” His clothes covering his cotton like verdant feathers says, and curses, “YOU WARLOCK! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY BEAUTY!? WHAT IS THIS!? WHY AM I SO SMALL? I WAS BEAUTIFULLER BEFORE BUT NOW WHAT DID YOU DO!?”
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“Made you into something you always wanted”
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“I did not want this! WHAT AM I?”
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“A peacock”
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“P-peaCOCK!? What is that…”
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“I know!” Isaac joins in, “It’s a bird with a beautiful train of feathers and when they unfurl it, it catches everyone’s attention!”
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“My boy knows better than you.” Ober says proudly,
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Which the Peacock embarrassingly kicks up his feet and lay on his back before thrashing himself around. Wailing and crying like a baby.
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“I wanted to ask you something”
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“NOO! YOU MADE ME LIKE THIS!! NO WAY!”
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Ober reverts the Peacock back into the charlatan but now he sits naked. Which again, the charlatan screams and shouts curses saying that the lord magister is a pervert. And Ober turns him back into a Peacock.
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“Ughh” The bird slumps forward, “I feel nauseous.”
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“Tell me who the LaughingKnights are.”
“And why would I tell you about them?”
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“Because you are beautiful.”
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Peacock gives a side-eye, “For real?”
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“Better than when you are Hemrean.”
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“Weirdo and I still will not tell you.”
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“Are they a group of jesters?”
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“No”
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“Then a troupe of soldiers?”
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Peacock groans and look away, “If you already know then do not ask me”
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“I was just asking”
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The crackling of stones slowly transitions to the murmurs of a crowd. A high-pitched clang batters down something metal at the same time something scritch-scratching. People talk about what they can use to cut down a tree and Isaac calls before the carriage completely stops. “Lord Magister, there is a huge Thinly tree blocking the road. I think this is the tree Ishka meant they fell”
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“This tree is maddening. Ahh…” A man’s voice wavers, Ober opens his carriage window to see that a line of caravan and wagons have gathered. Some horses have been tied to ropes to pull the wood but then again, no use. “My business, my wallet, purses…WAIFUS, might be all gone before next morn!”
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“What shall we do lord magister?” Isaac says before stepping down and asking for the people to not gather around their carriage.
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Ober thinks for a moment before stepping off to assess the situation–Peacock being carried in his arms like a pet chicken. The Thinly tree cuts the western King’s road fork with a larger crowd on the side closer to the capital. On the sides are two of the deepest rivers and no one dares to challenge themselves swimming over their carts against the boulder carrying currents.
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“Lord Magister! Isaac!” Ishka waves her hands and brings the two to her group. “This is the tree we meant earlier. It has been cut terribly so and I’ve already used up Ymalla’s wand today.”
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“You can’t use it more than three times right?”
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Ishka nods, counting one for the tree, two for the light, and three on the Peacock when he was a charlatan.
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“Lord Magister, can you burn it or cut it or move it?” Isaac asks, puppy eyed.
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And sure, the lord magister can definitely do it for the sake of everyone but…Kinguin capital is close and the sun has definitely set. No on brought enough torches to burn this damp blockade and, the ground is rattling. Nobody else to feel it but Ober and a blind man both look down at something moving underground. “If I start a fire then I might attract monsters” Ober says, reasoning properly, “If I cut it then the halves will dam the rivers, and if I move it…it is too large for me to move it.”
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“What…then what are we to do?” Ishka dispiritedly holds out to her wand, wondering if she can go more than thrice but Ober notices and advises the girl not to,
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“Relics like your wand are strict by their rules. You knew that you can only use it three times because you have known the consequence. Do not be foolish.”
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And Ishka says nothing other than to understandingly nod.
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“Now…” Ober focuses his thoughts on the ground which he releases the Peacock and asks him to peck.
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“PECK!?” The Peacock gasps, collecting the gasps of others seeing a bird with beautiful green feathers speak,
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“Just do it”
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Which the Peacock does so, questionably because he is headbutting the ground instead of pecking. Isaac had to tell him how to do it, “hit with your beak” he says, “Just like how you stuck your lips back at the carriage” And the boy gets slapped by tickling feathers at that.
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Peck
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Peck
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Peck, peck, “What am I doing with my life?” muttering to himself before a crack meets him—parting open and a giant earthworm greets him. “COOOOOCK!” Flying to the skies as the worm bares its carnivorous teeth. But Peacock soars higher, unreachable and thinking that he can esca--- Ober flicks his finger and the sound resonates to Peacock’s ear, transforming him back into Hemrean—naked and bare for everyone to see him and his dong fall hard on the bushes. Isaac and Ishka run up to see if he is okay.
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After the giant earthworm, three giant moleworms—moles with bodies of a centipede, digs out from the ground and sniff towards the crates and goods of the merchants. Some native barbarians ready their weapons, used to be for cutting the fallen tree but now for battle. Everyone on Ober’s road panics, many fleeing to the other fork but the giant earthworm is blocking the way for the forest.
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Ishka wants to use her wand but Isaac stops her. The rest of her ferline friends banding with the barbarians. “What are we to do!?” Ishka asks again, but the danger is alive and eating people and their goods.
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“Lord Magister!”
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Ober watches the scene, monsters sprouting out from their side and also on the other because they tried to use magic to try and burn the tree. River undeads are jumps from the waters to drag anyone unsuspecting of them.
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“Ymalla can save us Lord Magister!” And Isaac is right but, to throw away a relic on these monsters…?
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Something that does not use magic—the group of native barbarians busy themselves with one of the giant moleworms. Skin red with their irises shrinking. Their brute strength proving powerful but their weapons strike and break in one measly slash that did not even made a scratch. Something that does not make sound---everyone is screaming and totally not expecting to be ambushed by moleworms and the river undeads. Something that is powerful enough to deal an instant kill---Ober turns to Merry and Bell who are pawing at the ground and blowing at each other’s noses as if they are having a contest on who can sneeze out a snot first—Bell managed to do it. Merry wants to try again but then the lord magister stands in front and in between them. The horses immediately pull their snots back in.
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“gals,” Ober says, “This is no time for a snot contest”
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The horses whinny and looks down at the dirt in shame.
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Isaac who sees Ober conversing with the horses, run up to unhook Mira and Bell from the carriage. “What do we do lord magister?” The boy asks,
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“Get everyone away from the tree.” Ober commands before flicking his fingers again for the clutching bare charlatan to transform back into the bird. Peacock sees his master and runs up for him immediately to thank him in sparing his masculinity and shame. “Fly to the other side of the tree and get everyone away.”
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“I can do that…”
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“You want to become worm feed? No right, now go.”
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Isaac and Peacock both run to do their tasks diligently, while Ober brings Merry and Bell to the fallen log. Uttering silent words for him to jump on it, while the horses simply explode in a bloody rain that further screams the crowd and causing panic. Ober looks up at the two devils and now, waits for the people to run away as far as possible. Of course, the monsters are chasing after them.
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Uttering silent words and Ober sets the log on fire, attracting the giant worms and moleworms, as well as some carnivorous moths flying down from the sky, and a bigger—and fatter, river undeads. The monsters screech at the lord magister and his two devils before all of a sudden, he says “now” and the entire fork roads get covered In a dark mist—slowly turning bloody with no sound, with no monsters in sight.
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Isaac cannot hear Ishka panicking. Her hand about to wave but the boy quickly smacks it off her and snatches it. Shaking his head and gesturing no. Peacock is just as confused as the native barbarians trying to chop him with their axes or stab him with their stakes. He is not a chicken! Certainly not but they are trying to make him their dinner. All the while Ober meditates on top of the burning tree, sensing where Merry and Bell are with caution and precision. Two devils that he let loose just to kill some monsters—it is risky, and having to release them is like releasing a wild tiger to clear a house full of rats. And having this silencing mist, it would be a big mistake to lose his tracks on them.
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Cutting and slicing without a sound, gutting out her prey with manic smiles and a bouncing throat—Merry is one to laugh in silence before she cuts off the arms, then legs, then the tail, then the ears, then the nose before the throat and slowly slicing the bellies open. Bell is particular with her playstyle. Starting with piercing her sword up to open up the behind of a monster before she enters them and spirals in an explosive gore display. Organs and blood painting the mist scarlet, and then, Ober loses track of them—uttering silent words and the lord magister manages to cover himself in a ball of light. The mist explodes, parting from the impact of Merry’s and Bell’s swords against Ober’s protective ball. Their swords digging and cracking Ober’s shield. “Ἐρινύσκαθαρτός” he utters quickly and the two devils explode once again in a bloody rain before turning to cute little fuzzballs that definitely did not try to kill him. Where the log was is now ashes except for a millimeter wooden pole that the lord magister balances on.
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Organs, pools of blood and ashes cover the intersection. Utterly baffling everyone who are cautious to pass it. Some simply and hurriedly made their way. Then, waves of applause and cheers for the magister, and the unknown helpers. Great is the lord great Magister. Isaac catches the drifting dark fuzzballs and carry them to the carriage. Having them morph back into panting horses and sizing their harnesses and attaching the hooks to the carriage hitch. Ah…how the boy wants to bathe in the cheers of the lord magister. Though he is not the one being praised, he feels as though he is one.
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“Thank you, lord magister!” Ishka bows in gratitude, her cat ears happily waving as Ober pats her,
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“You are welcome, Ishka. Oh, and I am sure you have not heard yet but I will be hosting a festival next month. I would like to invite you.”
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“We would be happy to!” Stars around her cute smile and she and her ferline friends went on their way to the roads opposite of Kinguin. Ober wonders if her caravan have been indeed looted after they are caught since they do not look like they have anything else to hesitate on their trip moving forwards. Nevertheless, Ober’s pet Peacock casually steps into the carriage before him.
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“Didn’t expect you to still be around”
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“shut up” he mumbles and their carriage rides.
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The crackling of dirt and rocks and leaves rusting with Merry and Bell once again sneezing and snorting. Only a twenty minutes ride, not that long, but it is way too silent! Isaac knows that it is because it is night butu where are the crickets. These horses having a snot competition does not cut him some slack. Dangerously so, he feels as if the spirit of silence is with him ---and a ghost---. “GAAAH!” The boy suddenly screams, waking the lord magister’s attention who has been peacefully resting.
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“What is it son?”
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“Hey, horseboy, let the lord magister rest. He saved us back there”
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“I know but…do not you all think it is way too silent around these plains?”
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“We are near Kinguin,” Peacock says, “and---”
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“I do not want to talk with you, Peacock!” Gritting his teeth
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Which is met with the Peacock’s gritting nerve, “Just be a servant and shut up.”
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And Isaac does so, not seeing any words for him to speak other than, “Maybe you should be the one to shut up!” For the sake of noise, and a ghost sitting next to him, he starts one.
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“You are the one who is running your mouth first”
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“Because I want to speak.”
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“You have no right to speak with the magister servant. You are his servant are you not? I’m sure he COMMANDED you to speak only if he says so. I bet you do not even understand a word I said.”
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“Says the twig! Maybe you should go plant yourself because of how much you like adding flowers to your hair.”
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“HAAH! And that is violence against me! My style is fashionably floral!”
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Floral meaning flowers, Isaac is stump for a second and Mr. Floral knight thinks the boy is left speechless but then Isaac claims what is right for his lips and needs, “Only women are supposed to be floral! They love flowers and everything special for them has to be with flowers. SO, I think you are more of a feminine man than being floral. They call that in Beachfront Kingdom as WHORES!”
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“HAAAAAAUUUUGH!? That accusation goes against 50,000 of my kin back in the capital. And I do not care what the other kingdoms think about me but you are going against all feminine men and their love for floral appeal! Take back what you said, you cowtit!”
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“I don’t think there is nothing wrong with what I said at all!”
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“You imbecile!” Turning to the magister, “he your boy or just a servant? Why give him the right of speech against me when he is just a cowtit!”
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“You are also a cowtit to me so, it is fine.”
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“THE AUDACITY OF YOU TOO MAGISTER! AND THAT COWTIT! I’ll MAKE SURE THAT THE PRINCESS WILL HEAR ABO—” immediately covering his mouth shut, “—”
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“And who is that princess you are going to report to?”
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“I have the right to remain silent.”
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And Ober disinterestedly shrugs, going back to sipping his own tea. Once again, the silence hangs heavy. Only 10 minutes is left until they arrive, judging by how the thick barks are slowly appearing thinner. But he worries more about Isaac. The kid can barely hold 5 minutes of silence. He thinks of a topic, appropriately so that both can answer, but he is only staring at his reflection. Might end up doing so until they arrive.
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“Have you heard about the lochness, Floral bitch?”
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“B-BITCH!? Now You’ve gone too far servant! Bitches are for cowards and women ONLY!” Still he answers his question “AND YES, OF COURSE. IT IS COMMON KNOWLEDGE TO KNOW ABOUT THE LOCHNESS! BUT IT IS NOT REAL
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“OH BUT IT IS REAL!” The boy sticks his lips into the wooden panel. “The lochness monster is real and it is as big as the tree that fell earlier!”
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“Hah, as if there’s any creature as big as that tree. You must have been seeing things because as far as I know, that fog can induce illnesses and hallucination! I bet you do not know what that is”
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“I know what hallucination is you know! I might even be smarter than you. Anyway, maybe because you have not seen the lochness before that you do not believe it is real!” expecting to shut down Mr. Floral knight
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“That I do!” which Floral knight did an UNO reverse and made the servant shut up.
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But a minute later, Isaac comes back bickering like a child that he is, “They are real! The lochness has textbooks, and drawings about them that are consistent! And that is because people have seen and recorded it”
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“Just face reality and they are not real. You are just seeing things in the marsh. Plus, people like to tell tales just to sell them all for money. What you must have been reading are carbon copies by those cretin businessmen.”
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“Oh, that is because they believe it is real! Those ‘businessmen’ probably thought also that they are real and that they are trying to let people know about them. Why can’t you believe them?”
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“THE NAIVETY, only a fool would believe those cretins. Besides, why would I need to see if they are real or not when you just need the royals to give news about them. Afterall, whatever they say is word for everyone and the princesses especially princess Giza, thinks that they are not real and there is no need to fear in myths and legends. Hence, they are not real. And Kinguin actually survived the whatever prophecised rat flood last year, because the princesses said so!”
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“HAH! So maybe that’s why there are more bodies in the marsh than expected. Those were all victims of that flood. Lord Magister, you heard him right!? The princesses were at it again.”
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And the floral knight looks visibly anxious, thinking that he might have slipped his tongue.
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Ober says nothing, only making the soldier feel more anxious.
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“A-anyway” Floral knight resumes, “They are not real! What is word of royalty is word of everyone. It is pointless for me, arguing with you—a cowtit! Less than a commoner I suppose.” And at that ‘commoner’ word, he flinches against a sudden imposing presence.
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The magister’s eyes says that he has said enough, and further saying so will end his life.
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Isaac, on the other hand, continues to bicker on his own. Stating his own reasons why the mythical and legendary beasts are real. Adding telltale evidences about the dark west, and how the Gods have made these creatures to symbolize the values present in the world. “Which without them, would never come peace! Because of them in the past, the absternicus happened. And the books would have never recorded these great scenarios, as well as the fantasy writers, they would never know what to write, without the absternicus and the mythical and legendary beasts! So I say…” Believing that he has won their little argument because he thinks the floral knight is speechless. When in fact, the floral knight feels like he is being choked by the magister’s stare. “I declare that they are real!” Continuing his self-monologue on why those creatures are real.
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Finally, after Isaac tire himself from speaking and reasoning with silence about the truth of beasts, they have finally arrived at the Kings capital outer walls—which is also Kinguin’s first three inner walls. They join a few other caravans and lined up individuals before Isaac jumps off from his seat to talk with the barbarian caravan happily following their lord magister. “Hello, everyone…wait, I don’t think they can understand me…” By which the barbarians tilt their heads.
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“What is it, Isaac?” Ober opens the carriage door and the whole barbarian lot nod their heads.
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“I was just thinking that we should go first because of your privilege lord magister…”
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And Ober does not think more than what he should say in front of Kinguin’s people, “no need, I’ll have them follow us inside. The guards might probably think otherwise of them.”
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“Ohhh, as expected of the lord magister! You wish to lead them like the shepherd of sheeps!”
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“Lambs…” Ober corrects him before the child runs back to his seat and happily follow the flow of the que. And when their turn comes with the guards, Ober opens his windows and the men immediately lower their heads in respect. The magister tells the guards that the caravan of rough and haggard looking people are natives of Kinguin and they wish to trade at the peoples’ market. Which the guards did not hesitate to believe Ober because he is a royal. Except one, the only gatekeeper who remains vigilant about his job. But when Ober recounts of a certain princess at the farthest outskirt wall, the gatekeeper did not hesitate to lower his pen and let the ‘natives’ in.
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Their caravan enters and Kinguin’s castle is a neck crane high. It is just around the corner and the sight of sewage dirtied men, women, children and elderly disgusts Ober and the barbarians. But the group nonetheless part ways as they have their own agendas to crash out their papers. Ober recalls how Mr. Floral Knight remembers Giza, as the current princesses are known to use the bewitching magic of fog to keep their appearance and details as mysterious as possible. Giza, the eldest princess of the acting high royal princesses, becomes a prime suspect in Ober’s assassination attempt.
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