我和傾姐坐在沙發上,一同蓋在被子下。511Please respect copyright.PENANA0AEyzaBp6Y
511Please respect copyright.PENANATI1A8Ml5xE
拉上被子,右手拿出麥提莎,放進口裡。511Please respect copyright.PENANAItv4AFEzVi
511Please respect copyright.PENANA6YJKmhYIaX
「咬下——」明白了。511Please respect copyright.PENANAU1sB5uQhOI
511Please respect copyright.PENANAxuAsX5wcrB
目前,我知道了她和蔣少的關係。基本上,蔣家和家裡給予她的壓力,使她過著一個沒有自由的人生。511Please respect copyright.PENANA9eYl2rCj6W
511Please respect copyright.PENANA7qHfMbRD1s
難怪,她會向神許願,祈求能夠脫離現有的生活。511Please respect copyright.PENANA0DTTt6b7Au
511Please respect copyright.PENANA6ufTiYEMvC
脫離現有的生活?慢著,那不正是我做過的,最誇張的一件事嗎?511Please respect copyright.PENANA2beDtii37q
511Please respect copyright.PENANA44VOX98p4O
封閉自己的內心,流落孤島,徹底地脫離原本的生活。511Please respect copyright.PENANArA6ROtguVp
511Please respect copyright.PENANAdoZvL2gSvI
神是不是故意的?511Please respect copyright.PENANAWwpF2gaLOS
511Please respect copyright.PENANAvY5EUDpjB6
竟然……安排這種測試給我。511Please respect copyright.PENANAl2rDCq7grx
511Please respect copyright.PENANAGIy0aY3iF2
我望望時鐘,時間奇怪了。511Please respect copyright.PENANAIOpbtolQh6
511Please respect copyright.PENANAL3pltFkAJc
牆上時鐘還沒到達兩點,顯示著一個奇怪的時間。511Please respect copyright.PENANAS8gGzq1ExH
511Please respect copyright.PENANAzLVLO8saYb
「雖然你好想幫我,但其實我唔係一個值得幫嘅女仔嚟。」傾姐訴說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAnFtHAb1j9i
511Please respect copyright.PENANAMrhSCQUwjQ
「點解咁講?」我問,準備再取下一粒。511Please respect copyright.PENANAcAR7TSLFO5
511Please respect copyright.PENANAoEDTBKRZ9w
「因為欺凌同學嘅人,唔止得蔣少,我都有份。」她自白。511Please respect copyright.PENANA2Ue8oaMIGK
511Please respect copyright.PENANAqRXflw6vK1
「唔止有份,我仲縱容陳菲菲佢地去蝦其他人。」她繼續說,「就好似之前,要逼李可兒除底褲咁。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAcdpyTmusGV
511Please respect copyright.PENANAJ6i3icSAtY
「我做過嘅壞事,一啲都唔少。」她說,「如果唔係,啲人都唔會咁驚我,我都唔會有傾姐今日嘅地位。」511Please respect copyright.PENANANlXqaS8oed
511Please respect copyright.PENANAj1lIH0cqpP
「有一次,中六蔣少啲friend想約女仔出去玩,希望我介紹幾個畀佢地,我都介紹咗。」她黯然說,「雖然……我明知會發生咩事。」511Please respect copyright.PENANA1r23dZefVH
511Please respect copyright.PENANAuXqlE9mhlD
「唔好再講喇。」我說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAX3MZdLQ6Gt
511Please respect copyright.PENANAkXdXR9vgvk
「如果你係想幫我嘅,至少,我想你知道真正嘅陸傾兒係一個咩人。」她認真地說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAVwa9r9dQgt
511Please respect copyright.PENANAUq2GM110MN
然後我沒有再阻止她。511Please respect copyright.PENANA1wDnPcWwTR
511Please respect copyright.PENANABngQyDHSxz
讓她一直說著自己的壞,說著自己欺負了多少人,威脅了多少人,傷害過多少人。511Please respect copyright.PENANA7vyau7nWUX
511Please respect copyright.PENANAGqa9MvrFpx
聽著,我聽到了熟悉的聲音。511Please respect copyright.PENANAdzdqIpvSpC
511Please respect copyright.PENANA3mmvaDqxls
不是我也做過這些事,而是我也說過這些話,一些自責的話。511Please respect copyright.PENANAUD81H49dvA
511Please respect copyright.PENANA8LcV29I16t
透過用言語來責罰自己,讓自己好過一點。511Please respect copyright.PENANAeNvcGuykf7
511Please respect copyright.PENANAcJSW2BqTnf
除此之外,在寂靜的夜裡,受著海風的吹襲,以虐待自己的方式來受罰;透過惡言惡語,破壞別人對自己的印象,讓別人討厭自己,也是懲罰自己的方式。511Please respect copyright.PENANAxTEoPvdSVc
511Please respect copyright.PENANA8Ujnu7pexu
如今她正企圖破壞自己的形象,破壞她在我心中的印象。彷彿期望著我拒絕她,同時又期盼著我接受這樣的她。511Please respect copyright.PENANA27N4UjfQVZ
511Please respect copyright.PENANA917frPSlSW
聽著,聽著,聽見了哽咽。511Please respect copyright.PENANAuREMc7U1YI
511Please respect copyright.PENANA2Kgpx5iJYE
「Sorry。」她垂下頭,「你聽完,覺得點……仲想唔想幫我?」511Please respect copyright.PENANA5db1LqLSAz
511Please respect copyright.PENANALbqwte5lPl
「定係……」她自我形象低落,幾乎抽泣,「你已經想即刻趕我走?」511Please respect copyright.PENANAGagvAPJUWc
511Please respect copyright.PENANAgot5BFb0yp
「做咩唔講嘢?」她問,終於望向我,「喂……」511Please respect copyright.PENANA7oAmP31aIC
511Please respect copyright.PENANA66z2ZM9Df7
我也正在難過。511Please respect copyright.PENANAlLc1zuekLI
511Please respect copyright.PENANAWxYIDeUa7M
「啜泣……」我哭了,抹抹眼睛,「Sorry.。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAixtnHoDQBl
511Please respect copyright.PENANAhzlxiDa5SB
「你做咩喊?」傾姐問。511Please respect copyright.PENANAOoiwnLRegb
511Please respect copyright.PENANAJzNa6cfCCs
「因為我好擔心你。」我照直說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAH5vSABSO3f
511Please respect copyright.PENANA13sFuvZKcI
「點解?」她問。511Please respect copyright.PENANABnkDXTIeHu
511Please respect copyright.PENANACpuYWRjRfv
怕你走上跟我一樣的路。511Please respect copyright.PENANAaA9EkppPXf
511Please respect copyright.PENANAciqMBGbpnu
「我驚你太過自責,之後會做傻事。」我說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAGibi1xYPUy
511Please respect copyright.PENANAZ10Ta3WlIz
同是做壞事的人,同是不原諒自己的人。511Please respect copyright.PENANAM6oF6jkLOn
511Please respect copyright.PENANAVCGgPTogxQ
但是困在孤島的人、封閉內心的人,有我一個就夠了。511Please respect copyright.PENANAxeCJFLMEMl
511Please respect copyright.PENANAGJWNTZ4Ai1
「我亦都好感動,你肯講畀我知。」我說,收住了淚。511Please respect copyright.PENANA19oxkiXBfP
511Please respect copyright.PENANAs7d3PSUw4x
只要說了出來,就不會鎖在心上了。511Please respect copyright.PENANACboXCie5Xk
511Please respect copyright.PENANAOeF5Y7E7se
「其實我已經做緊傻事。」陸傾兒說,「我上網識男仔,或者可能……都期望緊會發生意外。」511Please respect copyright.PENANA9j3JDXjFI4
511Please respect copyright.PENANAlABjED6l0j
「如果我畀人非禮、姦咗,出咗醜聞,蔣少一家人可能就唔會再鍾意我,我就可以解脫……」她說,「從此唔再需要理屋企人嘅指示。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAbNQ7VyBEDr
511Please respect copyright.PENANAJxPhGulFRz
這是……什麼爛方法?511Please respect copyright.PENANApl2Z8sW6Tz
511Please respect copyright.PENANAglfFi3GVF6
即使要折磨自己,也不是這樣的吧!511Please respect copyright.PENANAHlCLFuDFfn
511Please respect copyright.PENANAj5fpamV994
在被子裡的手,握緊了拳。511Please respect copyright.PENANAFo3MpCoqEU
511Please respect copyright.PENANAsgckonua6S
「哩個都係一個方法嚟嘅。」我漠然地說,「只係,有一個條件。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAMFsLeRtdjZ
511Please respect copyright.PENANAhqJS6R7CdH
「咩條件?」她問。511Please respect copyright.PENANAOzlXTgURzI
511Please respect copyright.PENANAvVgFUcxqjW
「搞你嗰個人,要係我。」我說,「除我之外嘅人,你諗都唔好諗。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAqbZppWxNGc
511Please respect copyright.PENANAE2oJ1xDw6s
陸傾兒笑了,哈哈地笑了。511Please respect copyright.PENANA7vwiZjkUGH
511Please respect copyright.PENANAaRDYkxpV3N
「點解?你同其他人有咩分別?點解要係你先得?」她笑著,笑容漸漸僵硬。511Please respect copyright.PENANAmi5gT1XBeV
511Please respect copyright.PENANAOOkCecgwFG
「因為其他男人搞完你,就唔會理你,而我會繼續幫你。」我說,「雖然我未必可以長期係你身邊……」511Please respect copyright.PENANAoxuS1NAnIk
511Please respect copyright.PENANAUAKBPJFg8X
但即使我身在遠方,我都一樣會擔心著你,為你的人生而牽掛。511Please respect copyright.PENANAqaifdbXyqV
511Please respect copyright.PENANArxLnk7V2zr
「你可以點幫我?」她問,「撇除哩個方法唔計,你有咩方法幫到我?」511Please respect copyright.PENANAAvlsKkDWFC
511Please respect copyright.PENANAzxysmMAYew
「我已經答咗你好多問題,你已經知道咗我好多嘢。」她繼續說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAmHPtZ6M0b9
511Please respect copyright.PENANAetxWb73cRO
「孫正直,你可以點幫我?點幫陸傾兒?」她問,很想知道。511Please respect copyright.PENANA6G4ZspawSm
511Please respect copyright.PENANAUZWra02Ava
鬆開了麥提莎,我輕放在地上。511Please respect copyright.PENANAX0u5nmwN6Z
511Please respect copyright.PENANA9cmUpVyVqn
「我唔係神,冇可能幫你解決所有問題。」我說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAitCN4NKBsR
511Please respect copyright.PENANAj40EcgTp1T
「咁你可以點幫我?」她追問。511Please respect copyright.PENANAmK7BMqdEPy
511Please respect copyright.PENANAMKL4O0BnAl
她遇上的困境,不是耍一點小聰明就可以解決的。511Please respect copyright.PENANAWQt5fTXrpM
511Please respect copyright.PENANAHRtI53UmCi
也不是叫她離家出走、自食其力、無視家人等,就可以過上美好的生活。511Please respect copyright.PENANAzcyTX4HT5j
511Please respect copyright.PENANAQfEqgJeRxD
「我都冇咩方法可以幫你。」我說,淚水情不自禁,「但係……」511Please respect copyright.PENANA1rhoNHIVaP
511Please respect copyright.PENANAPsjlu1B64S
「當你凍嘅時候,我會幫你戴一條頸巾。當你想講嘢嘅時候,我會靜靜地咁聽。當你想喊嘅時候,我可以借個膊頭畀你。」511Please respect copyright.PENANA0hdNFeWkMQ
511Please respect copyright.PENANA2kzFQNMXuS
「今晚嘅我,只係可以……今晚嘅我只可以……做到咁。」我抽泣地說,「對唔住。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAMRcXSaGHyH
511Please respect copyright.PENANAwJJ8jBqiem
說完,她聽完。511Please respect copyright.PENANAt8ObbIKLWW
511Please respect copyright.PENANAyvudxXXjcA
「明白,我明白。」她說,「好多謝你今晚可以陪我,好多謝你,可以為我喊。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAgGMUxn4Nhc
511Please respect copyright.PENANADkaItrT4yZ
「我成世女,都冇人為我喊過。」她誠懇地說,準備離開,「好多謝你,孫正直,我有少少感動。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAJWTWEpCBrb
511Please respect copyright.PENANA70tfxZSebf
等等,時間還沒到兩點,仍然是1點35分而已。511Please respect copyright.PENANACYwgpaH4kL
511Please respect copyright.PENANAMVXH66JFPw
「你係第一個為陸傾兒喊嘅人。」她看著我說,「你值得我,畀一個獎勵你。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAbMAxIxHbeO
511Please respect copyright.PENANAH1Dzn48wCw
被子從她身上落下,露出了她的頸巾、衣服,和手上的電池。511Please respect copyright.PENANA2RlR7r4sjO
511Please respect copyright.PENANA1QonAij1xk
「個鐘粒電,我係你去廁所嗰時拆咗。」她還給我,「唔好意思,因為哩個係唯一阻止時間流逝嘅方法。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAzjArfK0EoQ
511Please respect copyright.PENANAltdauL0L7D
「但我依加要走喇。」她說,「實在太夜喇,聽朝仲要早起。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAQ6LlRvXIWs
511Please respect copyright.PENANA3g3jHxguU9
「陸傾兒……」我說。511Please respect copyright.PENANA5gH38e2QfW
511Please respect copyright.PENANAciTAK2QbQ8
「我畀你揀啦,一個獎勵,當最後一回合係我輸咗,而我揀大膽。」她睄一眼空酒瓶。511Please respect copyright.PENANAvfap8D5XGs
511Please respect copyright.PENANAPz3lsdZfIS
「揀咩都得?」我問。511Please respect copyright.PENANATzr3jua9xg
511Please respect copyright.PENANAp6aw7Gu6ON
「你揀之前,我仲想講一樣嘢就係,你雪櫃根本有勁多啤酒,我搵到嘅開瓶器,就係係你雪櫃個蛋格到搵到。」她說,「但你唔想我飲,寧願呃我話冇酒。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAIA7ftJ8bEp
511Please respect copyright.PENANAgOKFSPUu9K
「哩個世界點解會有你哩啲咁嘅人?」她泛淚,卻微笑。511Please respect copyright.PENANAQlplZTzBoI
511Please respect copyright.PENANArE9znniV16
而我不懂回答。511Please respect copyright.PENANANIesWBV7bW
511Please respect copyright.PENANAh0e2qKw70N
我是知道有酒的,昨天就知道了。我也知道時鐘被拆了電池,只是不說破而已。我猜她也知道我知道,才會在默契之下,延長了時間。511Please respect copyright.PENANAN3WGzZKYUH
511Please respect copyright.PENANASePMxIlYOy
「陸傾兒,我揀……」我準備說。511Please respect copyright.PENANA40Mr25xkSp
511Please respect copyright.PENANAWw8b0DpD5o
「你會唔會想揀錫我一啖?」她先說,站在我的面前。511Please respect copyright.PENANANrPx2sajLk
511Please respect copyright.PENANAnF4jGTPa9e
我展露微笑,問,「你覺得我敢唔敢?敢唔敢揀哩樣?同傾姐錫一啖。」511Please respect copyright.PENANAxAMPgLLq7y
511Please respect copyright.PENANA7vJONmNlgH
「視乎你驚唔驚死。」她說。511Please respect copyright.PENANAsahsGYp3Gd
511Please respect copyright.PENANAPMGMQU6aeQ
「我驚死,我當然驚死。」我說,慢慢翻開被子。511Please respect copyright.PENANAOynK10C803
511Please respect copyright.PENANAVRRZJsMJTX
「但唔係今晚。」我也選了大膽。511Please respect copyright.PENANAwc6MgvkHtv
511Please respect copyright.PENANA3USfB3zwH5
過後——511Please respect copyright.PENANA3JBmAbzG6G
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沙發上只留下一條米黃淺啡間條頸巾。511Please respect copyright.PENANAIjUEKLXp28
511Please respect copyright.PENANAGBUJ5jODcU
屁股坐下。511Please respect copyright.PENANArgSjNWyi2S
511Please respect copyright.PENANAzM4fIP2qJA
還有開了一瓶啤酒的我。511Please respect copyright.PENANAEgJVTwuFaC