Grace
“You’re Grace right?”
I stopped taking a sip from my soup and stared blankly at the bowl. Refusing to look up. I can’t believe myself. Even after all these years, I still recognized that voice.
“It is you! How long has it been?” he continued to talk, amicably.
I frowned at the thought of him. He was standing in front of me. I gathered up my courage, lifted my head and looked at him. He looked great, as always, mesmerizing green eyes, effortlessly gorgeous just with his dark hair slightly comb to one side. I probably would be among the girls who would swoon over him if it isn’t for what had happened four years ago. After all, he used to be the one that I probably thought about all the time. Every night stalking his facebook, squealing with happiness at every photos of him, and getting all heartbroken by myself every time any girls made a move on him.
What was I thinking?
“So how are you? Haven’t heard about you since…10th grade right? When you suddenly move to anoth-"
“Alex, I’m sorry, I think I’m going to go first, I forgot that I had something to finish, I’ll text you later” I immediately cut him off as I turned to Alex who was sitting beside me, looking bewildered.
“O…kay, call me if you need anything” he answered.
I nodded and gave him a quick smile, as I hurriedly left the dining hall.
What is he doing here? Did he also study here? Never seen him for the last two years I’ve been in this school.
Aaarghh! Just why?
Hope that would be the last time I saw him.
Alex
Who is this guy?
I kept staring at him after Grace had left. I could see that he was disappointed after what Grace had did to him.
He looked at me and smiled.
“I’m sorry if I interrupted both of you, I just thought that I knew her and decided to say hello”
“It’s cool man, So… you know Grace?” I asked feeling curious.
“Yeah…I mean not really know her like we’re close, but I know her, used to go to the same middle school up until the mid of sophomore year in high school I think… when she suddenly moved out of town.”
The year when she transferred to my school…
I stared at him as I fell deeply in thought.
“And you are…” I asked for his name.
“Seth, Seth Callaghan” he extended his hand.
I knew I heard that name from somewhere.
“Alex Anderson” I said as I hesitantly shook his hand.
Grace
“You okay?”
I read the text that Alex had sent me.
“Yeah” I texted back with a smile at the end.
I’ve always been thankful of Alex ever since the first day I entered that new school back then. He reached out to me and asked to be friends. I was the awkward, shy type of person, and couldn’t easily make friends. So he doing that really meant a lot.
I couldn’t concentrate at the anatomy class at all, my head kept thinking about the meeting with Seth earlier.
Please make him go away from my life.
The class finally over, I head out to the corridor and walked slowly with my head down staring on every pieces of the tiles that I stepped on.
“Grace!” I heard a voice calling my name from behind.
I shut my eyes tightly and winced.
I hurried my steps pretending not to hear him. I could hear that he started to run and eventually catch up with my steps.
He stopped in front of me.
“What is it that you want?” I decided to finally acknowledge him.
He beamed with a smile.
“You do recognized me, right?”
I shook my head feeling disbelief as I continued my steps tried to run away from him.
“Grace, wait-“My steps were halted as he grabbed my right arm.
I glared at his hand.
Quickly he let me go, “sorry- I just wanted to talk to you“
I let out a big sigh.
“But I don’t and we don’t know each other…” I paused and then continued, “So let’s just keep it that way the next time you saw me.” I said as I stared at him in the eyes.
His smiles were fading.
I walked passed him, and I realized that upon seeing him, my heart just ache more. The memories of what happened on that day came back. It was foolish of me to think that I was actually over it.
***********************************************
Seth
I knew somehow I did wrong to her, but did she have to treat me that way?
I was actually pleased to see her again after all these years. This is probably a chance for me to apologize after what had happened four years ago.
It’s been days since I last saw her, since the time where she totally blew me off.
And her eyes, when she told me off…I don’t know, it’s like full of sadness and pain.
I was searching for books in the library shelves when suddenly I saw her leaning on one of the tables there, eyes tightly shut with her right cheek resting on her crossed arm. I approached her and took an empty seat at the same table beside her.
Is she asleep?
I rested my chin on my left hand as I studied her face.
There’s something that had changed about her. Apart from growing out her hairs obviously. It’s true that I didn’t know her that well, but at least from what I had remembered, she used to be someone with a bright personality.
To my surprise, her eyes suddenly shed a drop of tear. I didn’t know what to do, but I figured I need to leave ASAP. The last thing she wanted to see upon waking up was probably me.
I stared at her for the last time when I got up from my seat.
What actually happened to you?
Grace
As I opened my eyes, I could feel the tears that I was shedding from my dream.
That dream again, it’s been so long since I had them.
I wiped it away, and got up to head to the toilet. When I got back, I started to pack my things and stopped when I saw a canned coffee was placed on top of my books. I reached for it and glanced around.
I immediately flinched when someone tapped me from behind, as I turned it was Alex.
“Hey!” he smiled.
“Hi!” I grinned back.
“You’ve got class after this?” he asked.
“Yep, unfortunately… up till 8 pm!” I sighed.
“That’s too bad, I was planning for us to hang out somewhere…” he made a disappointed expression.
“Oh well then, hang in there!” he said as he clutched his right fist and raised it in the air and then smiled widely showing his dimples and his pearl white teeth.
I raised both of my fist responding to him and let out a little laugh.
“Hey Alex! Did you put this coffee on my books?” I asked while showing him the canned coffee.
“Nope, not me…” he had a puzzled look on his face for a moment but then quickly formed into a meaningful smile on his face.
“oooh! Somebody got a crush on you! As expected! Grace Harper, you still got it in you!” he clapped his hands slowly as he shook his head pretending to be astonished.
I rolled my eyes at his words.
“You can have this!” I hand the coffee to him.
“But what if he saw this? He’s going to be really disappointed” he made a fake sympathetic face.
I shook my head as he continued his acts.
“Still rejecting boys, I see…” he continued.
“What boys? That coffee probably came from someone who randomly gives it to anyone!” I said and then continue, “And…excuse me sir, but look who’s talking” I shot him back with a glare.
“What? Me? Don’t you worry, I’ll date when I want to, and it won’t probably be that hard with this face that I got!” he gave me a smirked.
I let out a big sigh. “Why did I even bother…?”
He laughed in satisfaction as we walked towards the exit of the library.
“Here! You probably needing this more than I do!” he took my right hand and placed the coffee on top of my palm.
“See you later Grace!” he smiled and walked away.
Alex
As I walked away from Grace, I thought about what had happened in the library. I actually saw it.
That Seth guy came and gave that coffee to her.
I didn’t want to tell Grace, she probably wouldn’t like it considering how she treated him last time.
That guy, he probably had something to do with what happened back then.
I never directly asked Grace about that. I’m afraid it would just hurt her more when she probably wanted to forget all about it.
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*************************************************
I was heading to the campus food court, where Grace and I were supposed to meet. Just outside the hall, I saw that guy again approaching her.
I could hear that he tried to apologize to her about what had happened four years ago.
So he was actually the reason for that incident.
Wait a minute…Seth…Is he THAT Seth?
Grace brushed him off, and said that she got it, and asked him to just leave her alone. When she turned away and hurriedly entered the hall, that guy called her and tried to follow her and I quickly stopped him.
“Hey, Seth…right?” I began.
He turned to me, looking surprised.
“I think that’s enough, she clearly aren’t pleased to see you” I said remaining calm.
“Well, I think you should keep your nose out of our businesses.” He said in a low voice. I could hear annoyance in his tone.
I sneered at his words.
“Do you even know what you had did to her?” I started to raise my voice without realizing it.
He didn’t reply.
“It was my last day of my part time job when somebody made a call at the café I worked at, asking if a girl named Grace Harper was there!”
Thinking about it again just made my blood boiled. I was trying really hard not to let my anger got the best of me.
I breathed deeply and continued “does that ring a bell?”
I ruffled my hairs feeling disbelief.
He was starting to get anxious.
“And that was not the worst of it! Do you know she got a called not long after that, about her father?! And because of that stupid prank, she was late to arrive and didn’t even get a chance to say anything to her dad for the last time before he left!”
He literally froze and had a stunned expression on his face. No words were coming out of his mouth.
I exhaled deeply and then walked away from him and headed inside the hall.
There, I saw Grace from afar. She was reading her book.
Talking about what had happened earlier made me remember it all over again. Grace probably didn’t remember this, but we had actually met before the first day she came to our school.
It was Sunday, mid of November. Business was slow on that day, and not many customers were around. I remember she had a neck length hair and she was wearing a beige sweater on top of a dress, and paired it with black tights and ankle length boots.
It was obvious that she was probably on a date, the way she kept looking in a pocket mirror of hers. I thought she didn’t need that, she looked good already.
I watched her whenever I had a chance from inside of the kitchen’s small window. An hour passed by, and she still sat there alone. I could see that her face started to fall. Then the phone rings.
“Central Café, how can I help you?” I answered.
“Hello! Is there a customer named Grace Harper there?” I could hear a girl’s voice behind it.
“Just a moment ma’am”
At that time, there’s probably like three girls in that café. But somehow, I could feel that Grace Harper was probably her.
I walked straight to her table.
She was looking out through the window.
“I’m sorry to disturb you, but are you Grace Harper?”
She turned at me looking perplexed.
“Yes?”
“There’s a call for you”
She got up hesitantly, as I guided her to the phone just beside the cashier. I gestured for her to pick it up.
I hurried inside the kitchen to hang up the other phone which I had just used to answer earlier. When I hold the phone to my ear just to make sure she had pick it up, I overheard their conversation.
“OH MY GOD GRACE!! You actually went there?! Isn’t that like three hours from here?!” the girl from before began to laugh amusingly.
Grace went silent.
“And aren’t you suppose to have a science competition today? Talk about love sacrifices! You’ve been denying that you don’t like him! well well well! I could say that you would even travel to another country if he asked you to!”
She didn’t respond as they were still laughing at her.
I knew I should have put the phone down, but I didn’t want to.
“Wait till Seth hear about this!” another girl’s voice butt in feeling excited.
“Tell him that I said thank you and that the place was really nice!” She finally replied with a firm but calm voice.
She slammed the phone shut, and went back to her seat. She was smirking all alone and heaved a big sigh, then buried her face in both of her hands. I could see that she must have been feeling like a fool who just got played on.
Not long after that, she laid her hands on the table and reached for her phone.
Her facial expression immediately changed. Shocked, anxious were all written on her face. She instantly got up from her seat, and ran out to the door.
She panicked and seemed to be in a rush.
I thought to myself that she wouldn’t be able to hail a taxi in this area.
“Hey Joe! Lend me your cruiser!” I reached for his keys and went outside straight away.
“Wait! What-?” I could hear his voice echoing from behind.
“Here!” I handed her the helmet.
She was baffled and her body stiffened.
“Aren’t you in a rush? I’ll give you a lift!”
She hesitated for a while but took the helmet anyway and climb on my back.
“Where are you heading to?” I asked.
“Valley health hospital, in New Horizon” she answered.
That’s almost three hours away, but considering that it’s not on the peak hours, the earliest we could arrive would probably be two hours max.
“Hold tight!” I demanded.
Along that ride, I could feel that her hands were trembling in fear. I kept on thinking how desperate she must be for her to agree on taking a ride with a complete stranger.
We finally arrived at the hospital, and she ran out to the counter asking about her father, with me following her from behind.
She slowly made her way to her father’s bed where he was lying down straight on his back, unconscious. She collapsed on the floor without uttering a single word.
“We’re sorry for your loss, we did everything we could. We thought he already passed the worst part of it. All of a sudden he got into a critical state…and even in that moment, he kept asking for you.” The nurse start to explain.
I stared at her helpless body, as she had her head down and eyes fixed to the ground. She didn’t even cried. It seemed like she had a hard time believing it. She finally stood up, and with a trembling hands she slowly reached her father’s right hand and hold it tight. I could see tears were streaming down slowly to her cheeks. I thought she would be sobbing hard, but instead she shed her tears silently.
I tried to get near her, but then stopped my steps.
Will it help if I console her? I mean I didn’t even know what to say, let alone that we didn’t even know each other.
And so with a heavy steps, I walked away leaving her behind.
But you know how sometimes fate just can’t stop meddling. About two months after that, she walked in to my class and then was asked to seat beside me.
I started a conversation with her, and from then on, I knew I wanted to get to know her better. I didn’t even bother to bring up about what happened before, because she didn’t even seem to remember me.
“Sorry!” some guy accidently bump me on the shoulder which brought me back to the real world.
I approached Grace who was still reading a book.
“Hey!” I greeted as I took a seat in front of her.
“Hi! Where have you been?” she said as she lifted her head and looked at me.
“You’re late, I already bought drinks” she smiled at me and then continued sipping her drinks.
“You go and buy the food” she said again with her eyes still glued to her book.
I knew that look, she didn’t actually read that book. She probably had her mind somewhere too.
Seth
It’s been a while after that day. Alex’s words kept recalling on my mind.
So that’s the reason she completely ignored me.
Aaagh! You had really messed up now.
And it totally didn’t help that I kept running into her these days. But I acted quickly and avoided her so she wouldn’t see me.
I just watched her from afar, and I’m glad that she was actually doing fine on her own. I found out that she’s currently studying to become a doctor. I knew she was always that intelligent. Back in our school, she was one of the straight A’s student that the teachers always proud of.
I don’t know why, but it also brought me some sort of relief whenever I saw her smiling with someone, be it with that Alex guy or others. Perhaps it’s because of the guilt that I felt in me.
One time I saw her sitting on the same train that I was in. The train was crowded but my eyes kept looking at her the whole time and she didn’t seem to notice me. She stood up and I was ready to turn my head to the other directions in case I got caught, but it turned out she was just giving up her seat to an elderly woman. I continued watching her as she held the rail in front of her, then suddenly she started to smile. I looked to where she was looking at, and apparently she was looking to a father with a little girl who were laughing happily together beside her. Not long after that, she had her head down and frowned, then quickly turned her head to the side and looked out to the window.
I felt what seemed to be a sensation in my chest witnessing that and felt even sorrier from what had happened to her.
****************************************************
I walked up to the student lounge and saw from afar a silhouette of a person whom I knew very well by now.
As I got closer, she was dozing off again, this time on one of the sofa there. I didn’t blame her, almost every student tried to find a chance to sleep every time they can.
I took a seat in front of her.
I gazed at her. Her hair was covering half of her face, she had her chin down, with her right hand holding a phone which slowly slid down from her palm and headed towards the floor, and I absent-mindedly caught it before it fall.
I looked up, and was completely startled by seeing her face only a few inches away from mine.
I swallowed hard, feeling tensed.
On that moment, her phone alarm came off and broke the silence. I panicked as I tried to turn it off.
I averted my eyes back at her, and she was already awake, eyes open wide, looking totally surprise.
“Sorry! It’s your phone. It was about to fall off earlier… and I caught it”
She raised her eyebrows looking all confused.
“Here!” I handed it back to her and then walked away in a flash.
Grace
What…just happened?
I stretched my neck to relieve that tense muscle and stopped when I saw something on my bag.
I took it and gathered my things and get ready to head home. As I approached closer to the exit, I could hear the sound of the heavy rain outside.
Oh! That’s just great! I whined as I halted my steps.
Taking another would have gotten me drenched in the heavy rain. I stare at the vast grey sky, contemplating if I should just sprint to the bus stop nearby.
I leaned forward getting ready to dash out when suddenly I could feel someone was standing close behind me, holding an umbrella above my head.
Confuse, I turn around to see what was really happening.
It was Seth, again.
“You can take this” He smiled and gesturing for me to take the umbrella’s handle from him.
I remained silent and stared at him for a while.
I let out a sigh.
I took out the coffee that he had given me earlier and hand it to him.
“I know it was you who have been giving me this every now and then”
“Seth, it’s fine, you don’t have to do this anymore” I continued, I knew I had to confront him sooner or later.
“Grace…I’m really sorry for what had happened back then. Words cannot describe just how sorry I am” He said with a pleading tone of voice.
“I already told you that it’s fine!” I said and tried to maintained as calm as I can.
“I know you said that it’s fine, but somehow I feel that you actually wanted to say more” he replied with a low voice.
He stared at me, expecting for me to say something.
“What? Just what exactly do you want me to say?!” my voice slightly went higher.
“Grace, it looks to me that you seemed to be holding a lot in you, don’t you think that it’s better for you to just let it out for once?” he said as if he knew me any better.
“It’s okay to get angry, to get sad when you had to rather then holding it all into yourself.”
“To be honest, I’d rather you yelled at me than keep on telling me that you are fine when obviously that you are not.”
His words totally got on my nerves.
I stared down on the floor. My heart started to ache, it’s the pain that I had always been feeling whenever I was reminded of that time. I knew there’s a truth somewhere in what he had said and that just made me more upset.
“It was all your fault! And I hate at the sight of you” There, I finally said it.
His face fell.
I took another deep breath.
“And I hate…” I paused and swallowed hard.
“I hate that I knew I was just using that as an excuse to make myself feel better!” I said in a low shaking voice.
“After all, if anyone was to be blamed, it would have been me, for being a complete idiot who fall for a prank and left her sick father just to see her crush!” I continued.
“I know there’s no use in crying over a spilled milk, but I just can’t help myself…from regretting it…over and over again…” I began to have a hard time continuing my words.
I stopped talking, my chest hurt like it was about to burst any moment. I clenched the strap of my bag trying with all my might to hold it all in, just like what I always done before. But to no avail, my lips started to tremble, and I even forgot how to breathe properly, the world around me started to turn blurry. Immediately I grabbed his elbows and turned him around trying to keep him away from facing me.
“Grace-“he said as he tried to face me again.
I stopped him at once from doing so.
“Just stay that way!” I demanded.
I knew I could not hold it any longer, and I didn’t want him to see that.
With his back facing me, I finally gave in. I buried my head in my hands and started to break down and cried, weeping so hard, practically wailing a mournful of sorrows, letting it all came out on that very moment. I could hear my cries clearly as the heavy downpour slowly turned into a light rain.
“I didn’t…”
“I didn’t even get to say goodbye…” I tried my best to talk. I didn’t know what had gotten into me. I suddenly felt the urge to talk more about the things that I kept running away from.
“What should I do...” I continued to sob.
“Dad…” I was longing for him. I repeatedly called for him as my tears continuously streaming down on my cheeks with no signs of stopping.
I cried even harder at the memories of him that keep on coming through my mind which made my heart broke even more.
“I’m so sorry!” I mourned feeling remorseful.
“Dad! I’m so sorry!” I let out a cry after another, recalling his helpless body lying on that bed over and over again.
If anything that I regretted the most, it was my dad. I felt like I didn’t fully appreciated him when he was alive. It had always been us two and I felt like I had not given him the full attention just as he did to me. And never in my mind have I thought that he would be leaving me that early. It was all so sudden. He suddenly collapsed, and shortly after that when I thought it was nothing big, he was not here anymore, leaving me behind abruptly.
I didn’t know for how long did I cry but I began to quiet down as I finally accepted that fact. A fact that I couldn’t change anything no matter how I try. And running away definitely wasn’t the answer. I actually felt a sense of relief after I let it all out. I kept holding it in thinking that it would just went away on its own.
I quietly stared at the ground and realized that the rain had finally stopped.
Seth slowly turned around to face me.
“You okay?” he asked in a worried voice.
“Yeah…” I replied in a low voice feeling drained out of energy.
“You sure?” he asked again staring straight at me in the eyes.
I nodded twice and gave him a smile. Then walked away heading to the bus stop.
I hope on the bus and took a seat.
As I looked outside of the window, another memory of dad crossed my mind.
It was when I was twelve. I came home feeling down, not satisfied with my math test result.
“Gracie, have you ever heard the word ‘forgive yourself?”
I raised my eyebrows thinking hard about its meaning. I knew I had come across of that word somewhere.
My dad smiled and then continued “Well, apart from forgiving others we should also learn to forgive ourselves, for the right things of course. Like when you were making mistakes. Mistakes are what make a human, human. And it’s totally worth forgiving yourself over it.”
My eyes shed tears again upon remembering that, but this time, I was able to smile because I knew dad wouldn’t want to see me feeling depressed all the time.
***************************************************
Alex
I was holding an umbrella in my hand to give to Grace. I knew she was in the student lounge and planned to head home around this time.
I ran to the student lounge building, and there I saw her with Seth.
It broke my heart to see her crying like that. I never saw that side of her for as long as I had known her. She always held it all in, and I never had the courage to ask. Even at that moment I just couldn’t approach her even if I wanted to.
What is it exactly that I’m so afraid of?
Maybe I just like her so much that I’m afraid of being the one who would made her remember all the things that she didn’t want to.
I clenched my fist tight feeling frustrated.
When she left, I walked to Seth who was still standing there.
“I thought you wouldn’t appear in front of her again” I began.
He turned to me and looked at me in the eyes.
“I just can’t helped but being curious of how she has been doing these days” he calmly replied.
I frowned upon hearing that.
“Well you should stop feeling curious” I said firmly.
He shot me with a glare.
“Because that was how I started back then… curious and interest…which eventually lead into affection.”I finished my words.
He went silent and seemed to be thinking hard.
I walked passed him and stopped when he finally said, “Well what can I do? I think it already turned into affection”
I turned my head to him.
He smirked as I stared directly into his eyes.
****************************************************
EPILOGUE
Seth
I was searching everywhere for her at the science competition but she was nowhere in sight.
I thought she was going to join this competition. Is she not?
I was actually looking forward to see how well she did. I knew she would nail it though but I just love watching her perform.
I figured she probably didn’t take part in that, and left the town hall feeling disappointed.
Not long after that, my phone rang.
Ugh! What more did she want?
After much thought, I decided to pick up anyway.
“Hi Seth! Just thought you might want to know an interesting fact! Girls! Where’s the drum roll?”
These people, aren’t they have anything better to do?
“Grace Harper would across the ocean for you if you asked her to” she said and then laugh out loud with her other friends.
“What are you saying?” I asked feeling annoyed.
“Can you believe it? The ever so genius girl actually fall for it, we were pretending to be you and asked her to meet at Central café in Norcliff!” she continued to laugh.
I can’t believe what I just hear.
“Damnit Kayla! What the Hell is wrong with you?!” I burst in anger.
She completely went silent. No laugh to be heard.
I hang up the phone quickly, and search for Grace’s number in my phone straight away.
I had saved her number for a while now, waiting for the right time to contact her.
And this is definitely not what I had in mind.
I kept on calling her, but she didn’t answer any of them.
I had no choice but to drive to that place right away. Many thoughts ran in my mind, and I kept on worrying if something had happened to her.
When I arrived, she was nowhere in that café.
I ruffled my hair feeling distress. Started to regret for taking a long time to contact her.
After that day I no longer heard about her, except that she had moved to another school.
The end!
Hope you enjoyed reading this, and this story was inspired from a song called Sad Heart that i had posted below!
Take a moment and enjoy this song! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwtjtMJyHbs
848Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ZECw11cpH
