I knew he'd ask. I hated how it was truly happening now though. It wasn't because I didn't want to give him comfort. . . it was just that regrettably I didn't know. Maybe Chaos and I talked about it at some point, but I didn't care enough to remember. . . or maybe that was still something I had to wait to remember.
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"Luna tell me."
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Rickey's voice was more firm now and I bit my lip.
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"I, I don't know. . ."
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I could feel the anger rolling off of him now and being so close against him made me almost shiver feeling the strength of it.
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"How could you not know? You're older than this planet- do you mean you don't remember?"
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I swallowed feeling like there was something stuck in my throat it suddenly felt so dry as I watched his eyes shift.
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"Maybe I just forgot. . . I don't know, I wish I knew Rickey- you're not the only one feeling this way and not because of that bond either-"
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"Fuck" he sighed out as he let out another shaky breath then took a step back and started walking in circles.
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"I'm sorry, I just- I know we have to wait till you can bring him back but I can't help but feel bad that he could be suffering and we're just-" he stopped his pacing and looked at me.
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"Oh god, and you- fuck, baby and you probably do have it worse? I'm stupid, so fucking stupid sitting here bitching when you're the one who has to be able to decide when and I'm not making this any easier am I?" he rushed back to me and took my hands, his eyes had now lightened and went back to their normal gorgeous oceanlike gaze.
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I raised my hand bringing it to his cheek and smiled.
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"I'll be alright. . . what are you going to say to Ares?"
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His mouth twitched when I said his name, but his eyes didn't shift any darker, he still felt completely relaxed. Which was honestly a relief.
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"Why? are you worried?"
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I shook my head and he sighed.
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"To tell you the truth. . . I don't know, I'm angry of course but it seems like there's a lot more than we had originally thought, so I almost feel like I'm more angered by his ignorance than his whole being. . ."
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"How are you doing blocking him out?" I bit my lip.
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He shrugged.
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"Maybe it's because he's weak but so far it's a lot easier than I thought- I know for you and I, I don't really block you out it's not like you're peering into my brain every second- it kind of felt like a new door opened when he woke up for me- I mean I know there was some time between me learning to lock the door when we first merged, but this felt different for me. . ."
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"Different how?"
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I had been doing it since day one, it was beyond easy for me to block him out of every part of my being. Feelings, energy, thoughts all of it.
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"He felt scared at first- for sure, but then he seemed relaxed?"
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Unfortunately when I woke up I had already slammed shut the door throwing the key. I didn't dig into any part of him. Maybe that's where I had gone wrong all this time- interacting with him like a normal person when we had this bond the whole time. . .
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"Luna, you're spacing out again. . . talk to me"
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He touched my hair pressing our foreheads together. He could have easily peeked at my thoughts but he didn't just watched my patiently.
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"What if most of this happened because. . . because I locked him out? Sure I let him back into our lives, but if he could've seen, heard, felt some things maybe he would have-"
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"Stop thinking about what ifs, what could haves. If you do that it sounds like the end, and baby there's no end remember? We're getting Jason back. . . It would have been nice if he didn't have to die at all, but he did and now we know we can fix it."
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I smiled.
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"You're right- I'm sorry I just can't help it. . . "
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"I know" he shook his head.
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"I'm not telling you to not feel, Love. I'm just asking you to try and float with me okay? There's no anchor pulling us down right? There's high tides- I won't deny that, but no anchors okay? And this isn't some stupid piece of wood from a titanic" he laughed brushing his hand up my arm.
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I let out a small laugh.
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"Okay I can agree this isn't the titanic. . . We will figure this out, I just- war is messy. . ."
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I pressed my lips together now.
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"Do you really think it'll turn into a war?"
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He looked at me more serious now and I nodded.
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"It did the first time. . . as much as I would love to say people have learned, you know just as much as I do from the ball that's not at all the case- it's a matter of time"
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☾☾☾
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The next few days everyone had taken some time to press into Ares more for any answers they could muster. Unfortunately, there were no new answers. He was still really weak, and I doubted he even cared to move. I hardly had to use any force against him to keep him in place. It was almost as if he wanted to be there.
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We had managed to make a makeshift separate room for Janus when he wanted it as we had realized the chains weren't needed for a number of reasons. It's not like he could exactly just walk out of here. By no means was he tortured either, he was fed very well and his temperature checked on every hour he was awake I had learned. Giovani had begun his impossible search once he reached Italy. Eric and Cassie were doing the same on their end. Erin spent most of her time trying to tend to me in some way as if she had never left. I didn't mind at times- in fact I enjoyed the company during the few moments Rickey and I weren't side by side. Everything was going decently smooth.
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"Jennifer has been making many contacts- that I can confirm. . . she's in theory doing what she promised, I just don't know if I believe her motive is true." Alexander said handing my a folder.
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I shifted through the phone logs, some photos of her in her house talking to different faces, some I noticed, some I didn't- thankfully none of them in the council.
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"When do you think we should move in on her?" I looked up at him leaning back in my chair folding my hands.
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"No blood has been spilled yet- if I were to be honest I hope the second wave of this is little to none- ultimately the last, as I'm sure you feel the same, but if anything I say we should continue to gather, most people will trust her. . . which makes her our best option for weeding them all out."
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He reached over to sort through a few papers pulling one out.
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"As you can see, we have Ivan Kezlov, Adrian Apostol, Caitlan Sage, Charlotte Harper are the only names we have."
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I nodded.
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"I can agree. . . especially since from the information I skimmed over- this is already spreading all over? Romania, Russia, France and England?"
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"Yes, that is correct- and Brazil, it is ultimately both of your choices on how to move forward- but I'd advise we wait" he walked back over to the chair by the door and sat down.
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"Has Rickey seen these?"
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"Yes, of course- he got them as he was headed to his meeting. He's doing well you know- well of course you know you've been there" he shook his head.
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I smiled.
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"I do, and yeah he is- how are the Italian lessons going?"
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He snorted.
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"Well not bad, he is a quick learner- I'm just surprised you haven't just been burying him in it"
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I laughed a little.
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"I mean, I did think about it but I didn't want to seem cruel. I just want him prepared for at least home base. . . I don't expect him to learn all languages suddenly."
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Alexander looked like he was suddenly in a deep thought for a moment before he spoke.
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"How is that going?"
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"Hmm?" I started putting the folder back together and started working on signing my other never ending seeming pile of papers.
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"It's a lot of information- every language is now like taking a breath, my comfortability for the most part is surprisingly very well adjusted, though I will admit I am still hindered some what. . . controlling those around me is questionable it's not like I practice it on just anyone, I'd rather not if possible."
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Every day after had seemed to awaken either another memory of the world or the knowledge I had acquired from watching the humans. Their languages, how they pushed for something to believe in, even to the point where they made up their own stories of higher powers. Chaos made rivers by pushing water through mass amounts of land, making different bodies of waters. . . The sun, the moon all of it.
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"I imagine it's hard for you- I can't even lie and say I could understand or that I know how to help, but I will always offer my ear."
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I smiled nodding.
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"I appreciate it, I must admit- it's difficult more so because I know people are worried about my actions towards Ares-"
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"We all trust you- it's not that we think you're going to-"
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I put my hand up stopping him.
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"I know you all trust me, I just know it puts them in a difficult position on forgiving or not forgiving him to an extent, I stand by what I said- I am angry, as well as disappointed in fact Rickey and I were going to go down and talk to him together after his meeting."
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"Have you spoken to Janus?"
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I shrugged.
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"There's not much to say, now that he knows who I am he can't exactly be as mad- let alone for the reason as to why, his existence is to balance choice after all that being said however we are not meant to fully get along either."
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"I asked him why he doesn't try to just leave, he said he has no where to go- do you believe that to be true?"
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Alexander looked at me.
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"I mean, it is much harder for him to hide in this day and age- let alone trying to get food with things like cellphones and just overall security cameras and such. Unfortunately for him, when I killed Ben with that blade I made him stuck in his dragon form."
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Which in retrospective was not ideal or fair. Unfortunately I just had no idea at that point. Could I fix it? Perhaps. . . though it was very risky. Just as it was risky to bring Jason back- if I messed anything up. The balance could be catastrophic.
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"I still don't understand- he was able to shift easily back and forth at one point right?"
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I nodded.
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"Yes, however he often changes bodies after a while- reincarnates if you will, when he does this sometimes the bodies take some time to adapt"
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"Like yours?" he asked scooting closer.
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I nodded in response again.
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"I'm hoping relatively soon he can control his size more at least- so we can make him more comfortable in the mean time. . . his size wasn't something we were probably ever truly prepared for."
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I admitted regretfully then I cleared my throat.
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"We'll be going down there once Rickey is done with his meeting if you'd like to accompany us."
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I offered.
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He nodded his head.
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"Of course- anyone else?"
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I shrugged.
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"I have some digging to do- I'm sure it'll bring up some history if you all are still so eager to learn."
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He scoffed.
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"Come on, you practically told us you have every answer to our wonders- like aliens, are they real?"
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I shook my head hiding a smile.
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"I've been waiting for that question- though I admit I thought it was something Matthew would ask me."
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"Oh we have bets on it, so are they?" he asked cheerfully.
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I was thankful for the slight break in serious talk, even if it was something silly.
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"Nope, Chaos started other planets, but kind of just forgot about them or moved on to put all his focus on here."
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He sighed leaning back in his chair.
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"Damn, I was a little worried for a second there- thought I lost two hundred bucks"
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I laughed.
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"Who all was in this?"
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"Joshua, Matthew, Lukas and I" he pulled out his phone and started typing away.
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"Rickey should be just about done now, they're wrapping up" Alexander added.
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I sighed signing a few pages and pushed them over to Alexander.
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"All done."
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"Thank you my dear, I promise these are the last ones for the day"
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He picked them up and I scoffed.
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"For the day. . ."
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The door suddenly burst open.
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"Dude come on! I can't believe you were right!" Joshua shouted as he tossed some money at Alexander and he laughed in response.
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Lukas and Matthew followed behind grumbling.
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"Come on Luna, you couldn't put just ONE alien somewhere?" Joshua plopped in one of the chairs as Rickey came in.
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"What about aliens? Shit are there aliens?" Rickey walked over behind the desk to me bending down to kiss my cheek.
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"Oh nothing, how was your first meeting alone?" I smiled up at him.
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"I think it went well- guys?" Rickey looked over at everyone.
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"A real natural this one" Lukas piped up pointing at Rickey.
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"Better than this asshole" Matthew kicked Joshua and they glared at each other.
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"Shut up." Joshua gave him a small shove grinning.
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"I heard you two are going downstairs?" Alexander asked looking at Rickey.
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"We are- is something wrong?" Rickey placed his arms on my shoulder as he stepped behind me.
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"No, Luna said there might be something I'd have interest in though."
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"Oh?" I felt Rickey shift behind me.
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"Something for the history books perhaps."
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Joshua and Lukas looked over at Alexander curiously. Matthew didn't seem to care at all. Which was typical.
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"No you two may not go. Afterwards maybe you can ask Luna or Rickey, but you two stay up here."
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Joshua huffed slouching in his chair.
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"I assure you it's not that interesting." I commented.
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At least to me it wasn't. . .
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"Who's been down there today anyway?" I asked as I got up looking at the three of them as they stood.
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"We did rounds throughout the day, but no one has tried extracting information."
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I nodded.
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"Good."
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☾☾☾
The doors slowly open and I heard the sound of water and splashing as we entered.
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"Ananke." Janus's voice rung through the large room as he bowed down.
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Ares was hunched over and not moving at all.
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"Well aren't you just full of energy today huh?" Rickey snapped as he stepped towards him.
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"I'll admit it's lacking when I can't even tell how long it's been. . . what can I do for you?" Ares cleared his throat picking up his head.
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He looked like shit. His clothes were still the same. Honestly they should be changed at this point. His eyes still had an empty glaze over them the little amount of energy they held.
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"I've answered everything anyone has asked me since I've been down here- what else could you want to know?"
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"Truth be told I'm a little curious- as I'm sure Luna is about how you two met." Rickey pointed to Janus and Ares.
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"Yet here he is unchained, with his own extra room. . . clearly we don't exactly get along" Ares said flatly.
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"Chaos made Janus around thirty two BC. . . I wanted a better dinosaur, Chaos wanted someone to add some more balance." I shrugged.
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Rickey looked at me.
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"So he's-"
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"Really, really old, yes." I finished his sentence.
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"I met Luna when I was over two thousand years old. . ." Ares muttered.
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"I kept Ares's. . . specialty hidden for quite some time- he killed some of those who found out, I whispered to whoever to have them dealt with or cast out- it was impossible I suppose to keep them apart."
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I said with a sigh.
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"When I finally heard of such a beast I was rather curious, I traveled with him for a while- I was so curious what would push a man to such great lengths." Janus spoke moving closer before laying down slowly making the water wash up against my boots.
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"So how did you two make a promise? Or why I suppose?" Rickey looked between the two of them.
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"Well. . . he often came back, watched her for some time. Now you know why of course- however we saw she was falling for Jason, but Ares well. . . being Ares saw nothing but the tunnel Ananke put him into. Jason would be dealt with some way or another by any means necessary."
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Janus's voice paused as he looked over at Ares.
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"But you didn't kill him- you took her first instead. . . so clearly-"
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"I told Ares he couldn't choose such a thing for her, prophecy or not. There was no reason they couldn't have built the same thing they wanted still. To Ares's credit, he did after all indeed not kill him first, she in that moment made him realize he was a pawn which I presume it what set him off."
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Janus cut Rickey off almost ignoring him completely.
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"He was delaying the course. . . we already delayed it longer that we realized. . . as you can notice Luna doesn't look her age at all and that's because as Ananke she manifested her growth somewhat- so I thought things were progressed enough-"
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Ares managed to rasp out. His voice was still just as awful as the last time. His voice was normally a lot stronger yet somehow gentle when he normally spoke. I could feel the pain slowly seep around me from him pulling me down like a weight on my ankles.
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"Ares you said the other day you realized Luna wasn't meant to be your lover- or at least it wasn't needed for her transition or anything. When did you realize that? It was certainty beyond our time together. . ." Janus lifted his head up now watching Ares closely.
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From the corner of my eye I could see Alexander quietly taking notes. I could feel the shiver of anger that radiated off of Rickey now, but his eyes seemed rather light compared to the feeling in my stomach.
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Ares's lips pressed together in a line looking at me for a moment then looked away.
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"That was only more recent. . . the full part anyway- I think I started to realize a while ago. I realized when her body had to heal and regenerate from you cutting off her damn body parts like an animal" Ares said it with more venom in voice than he had before about the situation.
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Suddenly a stronger feeling of sadness started growing in the pit of my stomach now fighting over the anger that Rickey was feeding me. I knew the sadness was my own when I looked at Ares as he looked up at me with broken eyes. I had keep my emotions open to him when we had these talks. . . it was the only sure way to know how truthful he was being. Even if it was overbearing at times.
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"What is he talking about?" I knew Rickey's question was directed at me. I didn't have to look away from Ares to know. I could feel his gaze burning through the back of my skull.
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"That first night at your apartment- I uh, just had been brought back from his house after having Janus cut off my arms and leg to let the blood out of my system-"
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"Why would you even need to do that? Put yourself through that?" Ares asked wincing.
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"It causes interesting side effects. . . makes me a little more unhinged- I assume it's his core being and mine. After all, I force people he gives them a choice- we're like oil and water when we mix our blood."
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I broke my eyes away from Ares to turn around and look at Rickey.
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His eyes suddenly widened as he stepped closer to me.
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"Is that what happened at the ball?"
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"Somewhat, I have been known to be a little more. . . unforgiving with Ares when is comes to my reincarnated form instead . . . she- I whatever makes more sense to you holds a different kind of grudge."
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I shrugged.
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"As much as I'd wish that if she had remembered sooner maybe she would hate me less. . . I cannot say that with certainty." Ares admitted.
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"So why did you choose then to take her choice from her- things were going decent between you three right? Even though Jason was working in secret for you and all and he obviously didn't like that. . . though things were decent." Rickey commented.
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"I will admit I am struggling to understand how you thought that was the right choice." Alexander spoke up for the first time causing us to look at him for a moment.
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"It wasn't planned, it was rash I will admit- very stupid also now I realize. I was scared for you though."
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I let out a laugh.
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"Scared for me? What ever for?"
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"I didn't know if he would have tried to harm him" he paused shifting his gaze to Rickey.
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"Why would he do that?" Rickey looked back at him with a raised brow.
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Ares winced as he tried to pull himself against the wall more, but was unable and he slouched back.
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"Jealousy. . . his own fear- who knows- I was worried he might try to make my own mistake I almo- that I made."
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Ares swallowed.
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"We were happy. You could see that, for fucks sake we did an interview and I know damn well you would have watched it!" Rickey shouted now stepping closer.
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Ares's eyes stayed hollowed as he looked up at Rickey as he stalked forward.
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"He wasn't himself. He was more tense then usual. Had been for quite some time. I won't defend my actions, they were wrong. However that is the truth."
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I let out a sigh rubbing my forehead. The timing just seemed so off for a move like this- Jason being dead with such a big meeting happening would have been quickly found out- even at his most angered state I doubt he'd be so reckless. . .
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Ares.
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I whispered into his thoughts. His eyes blinked as if he were unsure if he was hearing right. As much as I hated hiding things from Rickey this was hard for him to understand right now. Too many emotions were involved. Even if Jason had been in his place instead I knew it'd be the same.
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Yes?
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He finally responded.
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Once you knew why didn't you do your part? Turn others? Why wait? You still haven't.
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Part of me wanted to keep eye contact, but it was difficult as Alexander continued to talk with Rickey about something I wasn't fully able to listen to at this moment.
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I- why are we talking like this? I feel how angry he is you know. . .
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His eyes didn't twitch, but I knew he was uncomfortable and I needed him relaxed and honest. I closed my eyes for a moment and thought of Rickey while taking a deep breath imagining a wave washing over him for a moment.
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Thank you, well I didn't know what that would mean for you- or how you or your halves would act.
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Mean for me?
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I questioned.
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I mean if things worked out how you hoped- wouldn't you have to go back?
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His voice sound confused as if the answer was obvious. My heart sunk as I swallowed. Could I stay down here for forever? The amount had time that had passed was hardly a blink for Chaos and I. . .
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I don't know. . . I simply told Chaos I needed to do this.
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I'm sure Chaos wants you back- we need you back.
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"Jason was a dead man either way. . . if he told Ares about Janus his blood promise would have killed him. . ." I finally spoke quietly.
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"It appears so. . ." Janus purred.
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"We're bringing him back so it doesn't matter."
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Rickey snapped clearly annoyed from me blocking him out.
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Relax. . .
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I said calmly into his thoughts.
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I'm not upset with you. . . just annoyed with the circles.
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"Surely you must know eventually you'll have to let him go. . . if you don't it will not only perhaps drain you but it won't look good to your people." Janus got up walking towards us looking down at Ares.
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"We are well aware of the time sensitivity Janus. . ." Alexander cut in.
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"I don't even know how long it's been. . . there's no window down here let alone a damn clock." Ares muttered.
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"Don't even try to complain with me in the room" Janus growled.
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"Honestly if anyone is able to complain about such things it's him" I huffed shaking my head.
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"How long will you keep me down here? It's not like I can tell the time passing so. . ."
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"Why are you so eager to know hmm? Got plans?" Rickey sneered stepping closer to Ares.
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He shook his head and looked up meeting Rickey's eyes.
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"If you honestly don't think I know the war is starting soon- if it hasn't fully been put into motion yet- you're wrong. I am war."
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Rickey bent down to get into his face.
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"Is that a threat?"
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Ares shook his chains lightly and raised a brow.
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"Yes, while I am chained-"
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"I'm not stupid I know you can get out of those-" Rickey snapped.
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"Yes, but not while she is keeping me from doing so. . ." Ares quickly snapped back cutting him off as he shifted his gaze to me.
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"So you admit you want to escape?" Rickey grinned and Ares let out a sigh.
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"I am fine with my punishment. . . though I will admit it would be nice if I wasn't chained up like this. I would willing serve the rest of my time though."
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Rickey huffed standing back up and backed up.
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"I don't believe you for a second."
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"I don't expect you to. . . however I may have a solution for us- that wouldn't involve you letting me go- well fully."
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I raised my brow and Ares cleared his throat.
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"I'll make a statement of my poor actions. . . and that I wish to suffer for my crimes- maybe not that wording that seems risky. . . I would like time alone. I will then publicly apologize to you both as well"
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"How do we know you're not going to say anything else in that message?" Alexander questioned.
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"You can record it- I won't ask for it to be live. I obviously can't look the way I do now. I cannot of course guarantee everyone to trust this, but I agree having another war won't go well"
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Rickey just looked at Ares not saying a word, mulling over his proposal.
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"Luna and I can control them, however we have to be present. . . so the hope is that things settle enough for me to your trust and if problems are still around I will still be by b- all three of you to stop them- Hell I'll end them myself."
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I looked at Alexander and he seemed to be thinking about Ares's plan as well.
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"I can't believe I'm saying this. . . " Rickey sighed.
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"You don't have to give me an answer now- I have all the time in the world."
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Ares cut him off.
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Rickey twitched at his words. I could tell he was uncomfortable at how Ares was acting.
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"Okay. . . then I suppose we'll talk this over. . ." Rickey shifted his gaze to me.
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I nodded.
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"Can I uh- make one request before though please?"
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I shifted my eyes back to Ares and nodded.
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"Lets not sugarcoat it- my clothes reek from being wet for god knows how long. . . can I change?"
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He wasn't wrong. They smelled like mildew and mold. I could still smell the scent of pine from him, but hardly compared to the awful scent. Honestly, it wasn't pleasant for me or any of the guards surely, but I felt bad for Janus smelling it too. After all, he wasn't really being punished now.
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"Alexander bring him some clothes." I said quietly.
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"I can do that, but how are we going to uh" Alexander struggled to figure out how this would be remotely safe.
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"I can stay with him while he changes." I shrugged.
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"Luna I don't know if-" Rickey started.
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"I'll be here with her Rickey she'll be alright." Janus offered.
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"Alright. . ." Rickey responded slowly.
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"I appreciate you making him smell less awful" Janus huffed.
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"I'll be back." Alexander quickly moved .
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"I swear to that Godess over there if you try to harm her-"
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"Rickey. If I could get down on my knees for you I would." Ares grimaced at his own words.
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Even I was shocked. To imagine the man I had made to bring war, violence and death. . . to be so tamed. So vulnerable suddenly. . .
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Rickey simply snorted shaking his head.
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"Maybe some day I'll believe that."
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He turned to me walking over to me and looked down at me and I smiled up at him.
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"I'll be fine, I promise- I'd feel better if you weren't in the room he won't hurt me after all"
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I stood on my toes and placed a kiss on his lips. He gave me a small smile.
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"I know. . . I'll meet you upstairs in the living room okay?"
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I nodded and then he made his way out of the room and I sighed making my way towards Janus.
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"I promise once you're able to shift we'll move you somewhere comfortable . . ."
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His golden eyes seemed to sparkle at the thought.
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"It's not your fault I can't fit in the elevator like this" he chuckled and I winced.
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It was somewhat though. If I hadn't killed him- let alone with the sword to trap him in this body.
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The opening of doors snapped me back out of it and Alexander came in his a handful of simple clothes.
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"We won't be far away. . ." he said quietly.
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I nodded and he quickly dismissed himself as I took the clothes from him and he glanced over to Janus.
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I turned around and looked at Ares.
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"He still is upset with me. . ." he sighed.
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"Do you expect anything less? You killed our husband Ares, no matter what made you do so."
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I said flatly as I grabbed the key from the clothes and started undoing his chains.
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"And what about you?. . ." he asked softly.
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I released the last cuff and he dropped onto his knees almost landing face first but he caught himself barely with his elbow and let out a shaky breath. He was hurting that's for sure. . . I knew how it felt when I woke up, I could only imagine how difficult it was to try to move after being held up like this. I reached to help him but he held up his hand.
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"I'm fine. . . just answer me please"
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I brought my hand back to my side as he balanced himself on his knees pushing himself up so he was sitting and started unbuttoning his shirt.
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"I didn't do this for a heart to heart moment you know that." I simply responded moving my gaze away from him.
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"I know. . . and I understand your hesitation on wanting to tell me, but you really are going to have to start putting some trust in me if you want us to work this out." I heard the water make a small noise as I assumed his shirt fell into the water.
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"Last time I felt comfortable and trusting of you, you ruined everything by killing Jason."
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I moved my gaze back to him and froze for a minute taking in his bare chest. He might have been a mess, covered in bloodied marks but his body was just as I remembered making him. He reached his hand out slowly to me.
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"I know, and I will do everything in my power to show how sorry I am to you both- and if you do bring Jason back I'll do the same to him."
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I tossed him the shirt and swallowed shaking my head.
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"A war is too risky in this day and age. You and I both know that Luna. I think we can agree on that- the amount of death wouldn't go unnoticed- regardless of how our remains melt, there will be a huge rise in missing persons" he continued as he put on the grey t-shirt.
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I gritted my teeth in annoyance as he started discarding the rest of his clothes.
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"I will admit I can agree with you. . . that's my main concern if I were to be honest. I don't think enough of them would realize it's bigger than just vampires." I finally let out.
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"You asked me about turning people . . . I'd do it. It might also help bring back peace- but it could also make it worse- could make a blood line war instead. . ." he sighed as he reached his hand out to me again.
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I swallowed again as my gaze drifted lower and I quickly shot them back to meet his eyes.
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"It's not like you haven't seen me naked before, for you made me after all." He snorted.
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"Obviously. I think we're on the same page about that." I replied calmly as I handed him the black jeans and other garments.
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"Some people have manners." Janus huffed.
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"I was only teasing. Trying to make this room less tense. . ." Ares grumbled.
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I stayed quiet as I watched him struggle to put himself in his new set of clothes before letting out a sigh and sitting up against the wall. I will admit he was being a lot more relaxed about this than I thought. I thought at least he'd try to buy more time out of his chains, but clearly he had no intentions of doing so. . . was it Stockholm syndrome? Or the past we had together and how dedicated he was?
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He looked up at me.
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"You can chain me back up now. Though I will admit it's hard to lift my arms up. . ." he gritted his teeth as he winced trying to move them up.
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I quickly moved to him and started putting the cuffs back on him. As I clicked the last one in place I looked down at him. His eyes met mine for a moment. He was in great pain, but somehow his eyes showed nothing but adoration.
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"Ares. . ." I said softly not knowing honestly what to say at this point. Regrettably I was struggling when it was like this.
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"Don't."
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He said even quieter. I watched his throat swallow slowly as he kept looking at me with that same piercing look.
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"This is a long deserved punishment for me. For the things I have failed you as Ananke and for betraying you as Luna. You understand that don't you?"
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Of course I did. I was angry with him. I was furious with him in fact in some ways. Annoyed that he didn't do his job. That I had to come here myself and still the plan hadn't worked. . . It was almost as if he were being defiant in some way. Then there was the way he looked at me now, not at all in the way he used to. Well I suppose that's not true, but it was more now. Like he could show me just how much he still worshipped my every word even though his actions spoke way louder than his words were now. That was the thing that made this so awful. He was my only true full creation I made, he was the reason I wanted to come down, I was in love with the idea of him being the perfect new being. I could have had- and still probably could have whatever I wanted with him. It made my stomach turn just how easily I had control over him still.
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"I know that. . ." I said softly.
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"You say that, but I know damn well part of you feels upset by this too. You might want me dead- maybe that the more mortal part of you, but the other part of you is disappointed, but like a parent who disciplines their child it's out of love."
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I shook my head as I backed away.
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"I don't lo-"
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"No, no I know. I just . . . I want you to know I understand that you feel the need to guard yourself, but I don't want to lie to you and say I don't know some of it is an act. I know you wouldn't want people to doubt you."
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He cut me off, but he wasn't speaking harshly as he spoke his words carefully.
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"Ares I suggest you stop poking in her head before I had to put you in your place" Janus growled and I felt his hot smoky breath close behind me.
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"I appreciate your defensiveness Janus. . . but I think we can agree it's probably just as overwhelming for him to be able to be completely honest now."
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I admitted.
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"You aren't adjusting as well as you hoped are you?" Janus questioned.
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I bit my lip.
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"Physically. . . slower than I wished. I don't feel confident in all the abilities I of course know I have. Even if Ares didn't kill Jason, lets say I remembered- or Hell when I bring him back. What happens then? Will they still fight each other? Will it become worse when he turns people?"
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Janus let out a small puff of smoke and he drifted his eyes a bit.
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"You can only handle the results as they happen. . . You know that better than even I deep down."
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He finally spoke.
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"I understand you and Rickey have to have a plan soon- I also don't wish to pressure you to decide on my offer." Ares spoke up.
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I nodded.
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"The timing . . . Truth be told is what scares me most."
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