這種劇情發展怎麼跟日本毒撚動漫十分相似，突然有個陌生女子在家中出現，然後同居。這種既異想天開又陳腔濫調的劇情，連我在講故台看到都會唾棄。若是毒撚甚至是一般男生絕對會點首答允，這樁美事發生十個男生九個都嚮往，剩下一個應該是同性戀。不好意思，我是第十一個。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzCOvp5UjV
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7b1xZBsO8q
作為一名A0毒撚當然想盡快交女朋友擺脫這個稱號，但論到同居我絕不同意。先撇開她是一個不知從何而來的陌生人，與女生同居這種事沒你想像中那麼美好。為何我知道?全因我之前與家姐同住十幾年，徹底了解與女生這種生物在同一屋簷下是甚麼狀況。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBYTANlfPFz
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa6JniWGn89
女生與你老媽不同，她們不是照顧你忍讓你的角色，早上搶洗手間，晚上搶電視，半夜在床上與男朋友講電話使你無法入睡，還沒算上其他破壞形象的行為。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2NUTYJTrZp
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxS676bvjx
可能你會說家姐是有血緣關係無法與其他女生相提並論，起初我也是這樣以為，但實際例子往往是最好的論證。有一年暑假，家姐的同學來了我家住了幾星期。家姐的同學長得非常可愛，但這個印象僅維持了幾天，往後的日子仿如多了另一位家姐一樣，我平日遇到的痛苦乘以雙倍。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv37BCqY2Ku
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ZOHVUdUkL
因此我對與女生同居一事只有一個看法，女生的形象率先崩壞，然後你的生活亦隨之崩壞。可能是我太偏激，抑或是我對上述女生本身沒有多餘的遐想。即使今天要與我同居的女生是岑月寧，我還是會拒絕，我怕會破壞她在我心目中的形象。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡClL8njoQah
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5mcVgGP9BG
「你傻架?你話係度住我就會俾你住架啦?就算我肯，我老母都唔肯啦。」我將老媽二字搬出來。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD7qBCQW9Cn
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOAcRZnTzK
「即係你阿媽肯俾我係度住，你就肯?」她抓我說話的漏洞。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9iDlSU1J7
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJcfQA4HIjn
我心裡想著老媽怎麼可能答允，我就放長雙眼看她怎麼垂頭喪氣的離開。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ44yzZooQDn
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECwi08Pw1W
「睇下我老母點應你囉。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡutJeD9c6sb
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xGMt6ZJOh
我跟她說老媽在上班，要十二點才回來，讓她在客廳等。我趕緊換回衣服，然後自顧的走到廚房從櫃中拿出杯麵，打開杯麵提起熱水壺倒水進去。我提著杯麵進房間，打算邊吃邊看伍公子的公子玩walking dead。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwfb6ouc7j9
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT6SINvClkB
想不到她跟著我進房間，我回頭望向她，只見她望著我手上的杯麵嚥口水…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFXus77XQDb
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡspabQRkkJp
「又點啊?想食啊?」我問。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ347jukTfAI
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoY4zgV2laW
她按著肚輕輕點頭。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFraBIYS4m
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQiYGvMwKQ
「又話自己係仙子，乜仙子會肚餓架咩?」我嘲諷著說。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj44EWA6fWy
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlpP7UMBxo
「唔食咪唔食囉，好叻咩!」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgZvmAGwTFf
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1EZly0meR
想不到她是如此倔強，我沒理會她繼續享用杯麵及公子玩。吃完後打算扔垃圾走出房間時，發現她坐在沙發一邊按著肚一邊怒視著我。她的眼神兇悍得猶如我是她仇人一樣，我怕了她，把垃圾扔掉後，便從櫃子裡拿出另一個杯麵，還注滿熱水送到她面前。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMB87U1Htkt
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1HHwHhOHMR
「嗱，食啦，廢事你好似隻餓鬼咁啤實我。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUObBnDe92
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5Fi9UQU63
「邊個話我肚餓。」她口嫌體正直，雙手已經捧著杯麵。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwi0z0JXmOh
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFXOeXRS2y
看著她這種反差意外地帶點可愛。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡklIyxbA9AU
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dBZbTZN52
她打開杯麵用鼻吸了一口問:231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKGQZka8UqN
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡByzDjKTF5K
「辣架?」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW706OkALrl
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EQNR3Acbj
我家的杯麵一向由我包辦，而我只會吃合味道的香辣海鮮味，要在我家找到別的口味是不可能的。我看她神情驟變便說:231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJDynuJDCm
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqhQlwcxLBQ
「唔食得辣啊?咁唔好食囉。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqrlIL5I1E
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSr7T8kNdqG
她聽到後反而大口的把麵條吸入，看她吃得滿頭大汗就覺得有點好笑。這種杯麵的辣連譚仔十小辣都不如，居然有人會吃到出汗。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡecNMI2lZzi
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbztXYOAdg
我看她雙唇變得紅彤微腫，便倒了杯水給她，她接過水杯說:231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQ06E4qRUw
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxciLRuc78
「唔該。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡISmfYa6jwK
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEeyq5sIO7e
「唔駛，我唔該你就真，俾我發現原來有人咁渣，連合味道嘅辣都頂唔住。」我笑著說。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWriTcjmgS
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4OKGVqDnO
「好好笑咩!?」她突然怒吼。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYedmmlniMZ
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfeHhrq93ZQ
我被她的神情嚇一跳，收起了嬉笑的嘴臉…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkEluBqeW6s
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0OUn0PI1jd
「你咁嘅態度對女仔，睇死你一定冇女朋友啦。」她噴出一句。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnIc3rJGPJh
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnZ1PstYnc
她這一句完全是我的致命傷，我不知如何反駁。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6n22yynY58
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡshSg8BW0kD
「唔出聲即係我講中啦。」她接連的攻勢讓我快招架不住。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIufpvV0VKC
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRH2xTUIRmf
被她說穿事實，我無法裝腔作勢…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJpdWvH34w
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QGeWX4Vtr
「係啦係啦，你啱晒啦得未，我無拍過拖就係原罪，你地有拖拍嘅咪即管笑囉!」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1N1Zpi770W
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlAv74E0k1G
我突然想起今早韓信他們也攻擊我這一點，說完我垂頭回到房間裡再沒跟她講話。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOqKN31bxoR
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtyoEwtFPI
尷尬的氣氛維持良久，直到聽到開門聲，老媽終於回來…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvOzpNzgEHe
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5XdRZqkMhB
老媽回來便看到那位女生，問我:231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlZwMAoHyJ
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhFiKzRWvi
「阿仔，呢位邊個嚟?」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuAPllkpU7O
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZEkj6SG40
「你問我?你不如問下你帶返嚟個茶…」我說到一半嘴巴一隻手被捂著。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTrbdZccGb
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEhORog7Tb
是她阻止了我，然後她把我老媽拉到廚房小聲的密談，我站在客廳聽不到對話內容。片刻後她們出來，我老媽對著我說:231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6qIsPApb9p
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqalYn2HUf6
「仔，之後曦…啊唔係，呢位茶小姐會係度住一排。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5m1I8I7GX
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKrRl1C5JWV
WTF!?老媽你搞甚麼?居然會讓她住下來?231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKiZr4bP5LK
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf5ETNGklDC
「吓!?點解啊?三唔識七點解要俾佢住?邊有咁多地方俾佢瞓?」我愕然的問。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡby9y2WYFc1
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG6rW3GuBY6
「你咪理咁多啦，同埋你執返上格床啲野佢瞓返你家姐張床咪得囉。」老媽四兩撥千斤的化解我的問題。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvS2ZJGii06
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFhg0oxkVr
現在同居還不夠，還要同房是嗎?我完全無法接受，顯然我的抗議無法撼動我老媽，我便抓了那女生到一旁…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZgS766TXT
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkDRS3sarK
「喂!你好講做左啲咩搞到我老母咁順攤?」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2OSFM6n06b
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0BgN9oCD1q
「我都話左我係茶碗仙子，呢啲野難唔到我，係你唔信我咋嘛。」她囂張的道。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQ9baNeGhY
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZeATQJAOe
「仲有我唔係叫喂，叫我做茶小姐!」她接著說。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3pawZXrZQ3
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbb2GaNjFtX
「茶你老…」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3nAsHAnjN7
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG8SohklVWs
「阿仔，今晚你瞓廳啦，俾人地女仔瞓房啊，聽日返嚟要執好上格床啊。」老媽打斷我的同時下了不人道的命令。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡisrDgkj6An
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjXBhg1SwH5
我不解為何要讓出我的床，怎麼說都應該是她睡在客廳吧…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EClCjb0Mq
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmzt70USWk
「瞓廳啦你。」她擺出欠打的表情說。231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp7elK4zFOG
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTWR4qXx7S
「你都痴線，我今晚老虎蟹都瞓房。」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09dTvXpfYZ
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1yXlcqb7YB
我絕不退讓，可是強硬姿態敵不過她下一句…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxCMMGrfQTG
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzYf8zFyTl
「今晚想同我同床瞓啊?咸濕仔…」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5QtfGBoMe
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWUA7ct14B4
我不知道她是故意挑逗還是隨口說，換著別人恐怕早就把她吃掉，可是我在這方面是個廢物，面對這種事情就當機不懂反應，她看我呆掉便說:231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqWljd5min
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvoGc4BZBzt
「你唔係真係想啊嘛?發夢啦你，同我死出廳瞓!」231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtX4N4p0WOy
231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzrQNhDiLC3
砰!房門大力關上，就這樣我與我的床相隔一道門，只好認命的睡在沙發。唉，我究竟做錯了甚麼落得如此下場，果然與女生同居就不會有好日子過…231Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJyfTBSbHFD
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