文: 譚嘉燕 FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/katetam1228/
星期六下午沒事幹,阿幼獨自一人即興的走進戲院,打算一個人看戲。第一次一個人去看戲時她還會感到一點尷尬,特別在買戲票,戲院職員最後還會跟強調是否只購一張戲票時,阿幼都會渾身不自在。414Please respect copyright.PENANAlX5KdTl2Rz
414Please respect copyright.PENANAN03aYdrcbE
414Please respect copyright.PENANA7orDZcxFf4
但後來阿幼慢慢習慣了,反正看戲的重點是專注在銀幕的內容裡,身邊有沒有人在旁並不重要,也體驗到獨自一人做事的自由和樂趣,起碼不用受制和依賴別人。414Please respect copyright.PENANAcE1jdIm4mP
414Please respect copyright.PENANAce2RJYeL8K
414Please respect copyright.PENANAk2oh2pY5qY
在挑選影片場次時,阿幼發現4號影院下午3:15場次的電影介紹很特別。只限一人觀看,那些屬於自己腦袋裡的幻想畫面。可能是填補現實缺口的美好幻想;可能是自編自導自演的劇情幻想;可能是誇大情緒來滿足自我的不自覺幻想;可能是不斷重複自製的發笑畫面;可能被困恐懼中的危難幻想等等等等……414Please respect copyright.PENANA5ZrKSTXoPu
414Please respect copyright.PENANAr3WI2qNg41
414Please respect copyright.PENANAYf7fTv6tvY
阿幼非常有興趣去一探自己腦袋裡的想像空間,反正她就是想像力過剩的人,最後她買了那場次唯一的電影票。414Please respect copyright.PENANAiI21B5cpGI
414Please respect copyright.PENANAirurHprZKz
414Please respect copyright.PENANAITS87GY6Xh
---------------------414Please respect copyright.PENANAz8ktPYH6bw
414Please respect copyright.PENANAdalqtqnfE4
414Please respect copyright.PENANA9Iuc8o8ClG
阿幼也買了每次看戲都會買的焦糖爆谷及汽水,她很喜歡這甜甜的味道,也是她喜歡到戲院的原因之一。414Please respect copyright.PENANAy7N19Sj2MI
414Please respect copyright.PENANALhkl91BhBW
414Please respect copyright.PENANAvF7bcYvdTn
由職員帶領,踏入4號院,阿幼彷彿進入了一片寧靜星空宇宙中。地方也沒有了牆身和線條的限制,她也像浮站在空中似的。「好美!好神奇!」阿幼在心中讚嘆!被一片星空包圍的感覺很震撼,那些日常瑣碎煩惱彷彿再微不足道。414Please respect copyright.PENANAY5yMJiqMeS
414Please respect copyright.PENANAzNQLob2ety
414Please respect copyright.PENANAlJ9QzFlhRf
一片「星空」中懸掛了一個白色大銀幕,沒有了一排排的紅色椅子,阿幼嘗試坐下來,她發現還是可以感觸到戲院實質的地板。414Please respect copyright.PENANAiWvntcvTh8
414Please respect copyright.PENANAimSccpkID6
414Please respect copyright.PENANAQSFh6YTsNS
「小姐可以隨意選擇躺下或坐下,片長時間由您個人操控決定,完結時職員自會打開門,請您細心欣賞影片,祝您旅程愉快。」職員笑容可掬,態度親切,但說完話很快就掉頭走了。414Please respect copyright.PENANAjHQ3PVLkWw
414Please respect copyright.PENANAoXf3JoUjtr
414Please respect copyright.PENANAu0ja3WeGWK
「吓,等等……」如果我想中途離場去洗手間怎樣?沒有阿幼詢問的空間,職員已快步走人,並關上門。414Please respect copyright.PENANAp6edx1yWVN
414Please respect copyright.PENANAMIGjdN0AQD
414Please respect copyright.PENANAcja4LpRqcc
在職員大力關上門的同時,銀幕立馬開始播放光影……414Please respect copyright.PENANATpQZQEKzUl
414Please respect copyright.PENANAteG5SbQsnA
414Please respect copyright.PENANAwvnnO9STDP
-----------------------414Please respect copyright.PENANAT1MYAwnP0P
414Please respect copyright.PENANAR2Bh6azEIy
414Please respect copyright.PENANAe3jppFfWP8
影片不斷在阿幼小學和中學時期穿梭。透過畫面阿幼再次記起學生時代的她,每次學校旅行之前的幾天,她都會非常緊張和怯慌。414Please respect copyright.PENANAlKgTkBAOyS
414Please respect copyright.PENANA4C8vrpJMgk
414Please respect copyright.PENANAF46HtwWKVN
「啊,好害怕。」小五學校旅行前一天,上著英文課的阿幼,緊張得手心冒汗。同時她天真地想著,長大後的她,未來那個遙遠的她,應該會變得比現在勇敢,不會再害怕了吧?414Please respect copyright.PENANAqwuAzpMrsW
414Please respect copyright.PENANAWJdxVL3JKY
414Please respect copyright.PENANAgLles53Z32
「好怯。我會不會就此死去?」中四學校旅行前一天,上著物理課的阿幼,恐慌得神經發呆,眼神散亂,身體彷彿動不動不了。414Please respect copyright.PENANAe5wa4PWw9s
414Please respect copyright.PENANAiOVzSwGcPm
414Please respect copyright.PENANAhe0tPLWDdK
現在阿幼透過大銀幕看到的,是一幅幅當時深刻掠過她腦袋的可怕影像:那些在報章和報紙閱讀到的,再一幕幕印在心田面對著恐怖死亡的災難畫面,還有那深層害怕死亡的恐懼感……414Please respect copyright.PENANA6p1qb51IGS
414Please respect copyright.PENANAkzsY3A1t92
414Please respect copyright.PENANARQ3QoIjgq6
現實還未發生,已在腦內上演,「恐懼感」好像真實得叫人手軟腳軟。人死後到底是什麼狀態?虛無得無法形容。她最害怕的,是那來回的車程,和其過程中的未知數……她會不會也……414Please respect copyright.PENANAJwYUWUnkWF
414Please respect copyright.PENANAOlNryOo48A
414Please respect copyright.PENANAJJ7jDTRKRe
不等阿幼感受到感覺,下一畫面,很快跳到就是每次阿幼到快餐店排隊買餐時,都會心不在焉地想著待會去水吧拿完餐的她,可能會捧著盤子地摔個大踉蹌,食物全部飛散開,然後尷尬的她就只能一直趴在地下,站不起來。414Please respect copyright.PENANA6NKIOZw2y3
414Please respect copyright.PENANAygx7rlN6vK
414Please respect copyright.PENANAQLlWvo2sTl
「喔,還好現實中都沒有真實發生過。」阿幼用左手摀住自己的雙眼。她覺得跌倒的自己太狼狽了,連只是在想像裡都難以忍受。到底「無緣故摔倒」的念頭從何以來?其實現在她也追究不到。414Please respect copyright.PENANADYmRtCELN4
414Please respect copyright.PENANAxQxLlCCyDx
414Please respect copyright.PENANAP2Cny1K3ik
再下一秒,阿幼看見的不是過去的自己,而是現在的模樣。但那模樣也不能說是真實的她……414Please respect copyright.PENANAhDXqNZEkI1
414Please respect copyright.PENANAIAQMol7HuJ
414Please respect copyright.PENANA0iFq3aLRPf
現實世界裡的阿幼,身型有點肉地,五官不算精細,衣櫥裡只有黑色和灰色的衣物,也沒有在人群中特別亮眼……414Please respect copyright.PENANAY0u2xvUzNQ
414Please respect copyright.PENANABqHdtkPNNf
414Please respect copyright.PENANAeCluJVqoS7
但那銀幕裡的她,身型瘦削,衣著打扮色調鮮艷,染了一頭淡粉綠色的頭髮,說話自信,勇敢無懼……414Please respect copyright.PENANA27qCiDxMq4
414Please respect copyright.PENANAkBtGu2hLHm
414Please respect copyright.PENANAaHeFVrAAy8
「嘩!」阿幼看著看著,雙眼閃閃發光,如一顆星星。銀幕裡播放的那個影像,有著現實裡的她沒有的,卻深切渴望擁有的一切一切。414Please respect copyright.PENANAtLekOIcuuG
414Please respect copyright.PENANAAkVjZ8syDO
414Please respect copyright.PENANAskE4lfNxz2
這種理想的想像也算是一種很內心的小秘密吧。不過阿幼知道,很多人都是這樣,一直藏著和獨自暗暗享受著這個小秘密。414Please respect copyright.PENANA4QLf0RINYd
414Please respect copyright.PENANASpZDjcdb0E
414Please respect copyright.PENANAUHYzIwVbuB
-----------------------414Please respect copyright.PENANAoFARzt6htN
414Please respect copyright.PENANAZtGo44eVIX
414Please respect copyright.PENANAgSy2ugw34O
就這樣,阿幼在4號影院已過了兩天,她只有偶爾吃吃一開始帶進場的爆谷和汽水。影院那道門口沒有打開過,阿幼也痴迷的沈醉銀幕中,由自己所創造、虛構的世界……414Please respect copyright.PENANA1ek2WeijTG
414Please respect copyright.PENANAEz5WzntckC
414Please respect copyright.PENANAvRNfsvCC6X
但現實裡4號影院沒有因她而停滯,仍然開放著,每天接待一位客人進去……414Please respect copyright.PENANASPHlKyYSlo
文: 譚嘉燕 FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/katetam1228/414Please respect copyright.PENANAspPJZIIi3I