[FANFIC - HBD, KARIN!] PÉRIODICITÉ (SK)
Title: périodicité470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXVrRI1mor
By: Kanae (Goth-Punk88 @ ff.net)470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9LnKEOWa9W
Rating: K+470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBYpKMaPLbU
Word Count: 2.817470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODnKqkis6J
Author's Notes: Made for our "Karin's birthday week" over at the Ice&Spice FC @ NF ♥ I... don't even know what this is, or where it came from, and it's possibly one of the cheesiest pieces I've written for SK. But I kind of regret nothing lol - Oh and that novice drawing at the top of the fic? yup, mines. guilty as charged orz470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjW6Yow7WA7
Summary: June 20 has never been an ordinary day for one Uzumaki Karin.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLarhabAE8
périodicité (periodicity)470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡldweF6IF34
"recurrence at regular intervals of time."
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périodicité;470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOMS47BIs9f
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by Kanae
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“Don’t look so down, darling. This is a great chance for you.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UwzJdPNdm
“…Yeah… a great chance to make a fool of myself, you mean.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEM5Vh7kk2
A twinkling laugh, a delicate hand warmly lands over a girl’s head and—
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At twelve, there aren’t many things that Karin has done or that she wishes to do. She is just an ordinary girl from an ordinary family living in an ordinary village; there is nothing special about her, nothing out of the norm, nothing that makes her stand out—if one ignores her flagrant red hair, that is.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4XqC99CEo7
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But that is just what her father seems to have wanted to do all along.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fGQ2M717A
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You’re going out? Don’t forget to put your hood on, Karin, he would say, whenever Karin had to wander away from the immediate realms of their home. Why, papa? She used to ask when she was no more than a little girl; but that was a habit that slowly but surely withered and died as she began to grow up—as she started to grow aware enough to notice the wary air her father’s kind, wise red eyes acquired as the reminder left his lips.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡruWBMpKVAP
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As she grew older, Karin learned to recognize it for what it truly was: more a warning than a piece of advice; and she began to grow more jittery as result, more worn at the seams.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE93cTiF5NW
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Her red hair was her only outstanding trait, the only thing that made her different—without it, Karin may as well fade into the scenery.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQjDXhlFQO
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She may as well not exist.
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—and ruffles her hair.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc57c7SBs0G
“Now, now, don’t be like that. I have a good feeling about this, you know?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLh37mrC5AN
“…What do you mean, mama?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwVl5MQWYKL
A secretive smile highlighted by—
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At thirteen, Karin nearly dies.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJz8XbE7d3Z
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And then she is saved—saved by a striking boy with a rich voice and eyes that warm her up to the core the moment he smiles—at her, for her—and suddenly, Karin does not feel so ordinary anymore.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyqJAUyasoh
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There is something different about you, her mother tells her once with a knowing smile, ever since you came back from Konoha.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHtTjPIJnf
Karin jumps in her seat, awkward denial bubbling up in her throat and evaporating the moment her mother laughs, I like it. You look prettier, Karin.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYl3YeDSos
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She does not know about that—can’t see any difference as she looks at herself in the mirror, self-consciously pulling on some strands of red hair and squinting at her reflection.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCLkurSlPJ7
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What she does know, though—what she can’t forget, is—470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3bPH1poznC
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See ya, he had said, and it takes Karin a surprising amount of time to realize that, for the first time since she could remember, there was something she wanted.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxzBQAiQHL
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Wanted for herself; not for her parents, not for those she cares about. Something that was completely hers, in all its staggering intensity and youthful hope.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUM4qycWOjS
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See ya, he had said, and until then Karin had never quite known how good it felt to feel alive.
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—by amber eyes that seem to spark.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmwAtrEVXB3
“Ara~ I wonder if I should tell you. It is a safely guarded secret, you see.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jd0EscEZ8
“I will keep it! I promise, I won’t tell anybody, mama!”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1VWOABggPl
A chuckle, “Alright, alright! Since you insist, I'll tell you. It—”
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At fourteen, Karin breathes her last breath.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz0833KmH2A
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There is no blood—not hers—involved, nor are there any wounds—not physical ones—or any white walls or tunnels and gates of light—no light, only dark—only smoke—only the smell of burnt flesh and intest—470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtDGj47qt2C
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There is, however, anguish. An agony so great that Karin bit her lip until it bled, fisted her palms until her nails left permanent crescent-moon shaped scars in the contours of her skin, new batches added to already cracked life lines.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAMEUxyqgoq
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There are silent, chocked sobs that made her throat burn and her sight blur until she has ran out of tears.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8ccVUKTW2
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And there is also horror; a burning, paralyzing sort of horror that reaches its peak and fades into a mute but perpetual tune stringing the chords of her being as she comes back and stares at the corpses of her father and mother, unrecognizable masses of ashes retching of burnt blood and bodily fluids that make a pile of vile crawl its way up to her tongue.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVWL00azZct
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And then, there is he—sidestepping the man with ominous dark chakra and extending a hand towards her, onyx eyes boring into her own with the same might with which the understanding in his chakra drove her horror away.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuNWZOGBeVu
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You staying here will amount to nothing, but you leaving just might, he says. Come, Karin, he calls.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50z4vVLUrp
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She takes his hand, and there is hope.
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“—It is said that one too many women in our family have found their fate in the lands of Konohagakure.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEqFRG3Di8
“Their… fate?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaclvH0Vx0d
Her voice curls up around the edges, as if it were a spell.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPWOER5qg8
“You will understand in—”
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At fifteen, Karin has shed her skin.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNl58Uq3xJc
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There are now sharp edges where there used to be soft contours; angry frowns where there used to be kindness, smirks where there used to be smiles; buoyancy where there once was shame, barriers in what once were vast landscapes—and there are also scars.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTH5nC1SJhd
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Tell-tale scars of the Karin she used to be and new, revolting ones from the Karin she has become. She hides the latter and denies the former; pretends they’re long gone, never aching, never hurting anymore.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIuIN74Dh1R
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Yet, he sees them all. As if she wore them on her sleeve.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXuHCUfuSr
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“Say, Sasuke, since we’re alone how about we—”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdWMAOmoZz5
“I have to leave soon, Karin.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPL4yMp6bJk
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She puts her glasses back on and crosses her arms with a frown, moving away from him. “Why did you even bother coming, then?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkvmafz0Kh
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Sasuke says nothing, then. He says nothing, and Karin straightens, her back suddenly assaulted by gooseflesh; could he—?470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6KmOiNFyX
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Could he have possibly known? Known how before his unexpected arrival, Karin had been hounded by her memories. Seeing familiar faces in the nameless prisoners of the base, ghosts come back to haunt her and pull her down with them to the depths of hell—a hell made of nothing but flames and guilt of mistakes she is not sure she would take back, even if she could.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJbBxDVSSd
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“…I had business here, is all.” His voice reaches out to her through the haze of her thoughts, pulling her back with nonchalant words that seemed devoid of any meaning.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkViZtj6OhG
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But as she turns and her eyes meet his, Karin sees.
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“—in due time, Karin.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiK37OerU5O
“Still, mama… it just isn’t fair.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvGQRwZ1T07
“What isn’t, dear?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzI4YY9VFh0
“… I wanted to spend my birthday with you and papa.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT9Cx3aahkc
Her smile—
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At sixteen, Karin falls.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCNDtUNiOIU
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She falls from a great, great height at appalling speed; she hasn’t even had time to acknowledge the abysm before she has hit rock bottom, her goals and dreams spilling through her open chest and pooling on the ground alongside everything she knows.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4nMxaj4c5
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Alongside everything she once held dear. Everyone she relied on. The one she trusted.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmelosxlVs
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Now, there was no one left.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaz5VfDcYQx
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No one left but the roaming, empty carcass of the boy she once loved; the boy who taught her what it felt like to be alive, the boy who gave her hope and helped her find meaning back when she had lost her way, the boy who helped her to be reborn from her ashes into someone better; someone stronger, someone capable of standing up for herself and for him, too. The boy who flared her will and her drive with a single touch, with a single look, with the simplest of words—470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXPCQSZjOqH
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“So much for that,” Karin mutters to no one, her back pressed against the cold walls of a cell and her fingers absentmindedly tracing the ghost of the wound that had taken her heart out for good.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNbcna4HE67
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And then it comes. An almost unnoticeable flicker—too subtle to be perceived, but too longed for to be ignored.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmkWsGujxZB
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No… I’ve had enough, Sasuke but her withered heart is trying to beat again, and it makes up her mind for her.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNosb6YZd2F
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“…So much for this,” Karin murmurs to herself—and then she is on her feet again, her inner eye tracing his every move.
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—melts.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAvkgUM20F
“Cheer up, love. There will be many birthdays left for us to celebrate together.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC24mc7HiaC
“… You promise?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCYkPb1JUfW
Her gaze softens.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cP5gR9nnl
“I promise.”
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At seventeen, Karin kisses him.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLXvcfnoc2
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She impulsively crashes her lips against his, her arms thrown around his neck in a desperate attempt to hold onto him—to anchor him down before his essence could have the chance to fade into pitch black darkness again, to feel him before he could have the chance to waste his life—her life, their future—chasing phantoms all the way to the death.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYY5KVzQULp
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When the impromptu kiss ends, Karin sees him—the him she knows, the him she loves—flickering across his eyes for the briefest of moments, and she hears her name resounding in her ears even though he has not uttered a single sound.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq28TJC6Tj6
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She smiles ruefully; trembling eyes boring into his—and then wordlessly lets him go.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmyJx5ECOhX
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She has given him a reason, but the choice is his to make.
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“Ha, so it was about a boy, I knew it!”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TVy5z0vap
“Shh, mama! I don’t want papa to hear! And… it’s not like I’m ever going to see him again, anyway….”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEII6cmW1Dh
Her mother has to hide her smile, “Actually, Karin… something tells me you just might.”
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At eighteen, Sasuke kisses her back.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXM1u9ymBKu
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It is not nearly as passionate as her—their—first kiss had been; there is no desperation, no adrenaline—but there is craving all the same, waving through the serenity threading over her through the gentle pressure of his fingertips over the nape of her neck, enveloping her like a makeshift cloak and warming her down to her very core.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3wiBgqVyBI
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And Karin feels her very essence quiver under it—under the warmth and the way her heart seemed to want to leave her and jump into him instead, to claim the home it has always longed for; the home it has always fought for.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1Jhb5CPuf
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The home it belonged to.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpMKkth6E3M
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As he kisses her, sunrays clumsily dancing upon her lips, Karin feels like she would vaporize into him if Sasuke were to take a single breath.
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“How do you know?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwePw201Pbm
“Because, that’s how fate works, Karin.”
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At nineteen, Karin smiles.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoEPWBN7kYe
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“Itachi,” she says, and Sasuke looks up to her, startled. “The name… Itachi. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyACUXJj14E
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Sasuke parts his lips—once, twice—but no sound comes out and soon enough he gives up altogether, lowering his eyes to stare at the bundle in his arms. It stares back at him, impossibly red eyes widened with innocent curiosity, pink tongue sticking out from underneath rosy lips.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpIiiHYxHT
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“Are you sure, Karin?” he whispers after what seemed like an eternity, and Karin’s smile only widens.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1FWj9hmC6
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“Yeah.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHzxGJkQrIz
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And as she sees them—as she sees Sasuke hold their baby as if he were holding the whole, wide world in the crook of his arms—Karin remembers her mother with such vivid clarity that she catches a breath of her perfume. The memory—the vision is bittersweet, and it makes Karin’s throat clog, because she recognizes that look.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQFMyDOpxG
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It was the way her mother used to look at her father and her, eyes brimming with love and pride, unspoken but ever-present, never changing. Karin had not been able to understand it, then—470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh60hDCzKvV
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But she did, now. And the understanding squeezed her heart in a way that was both, wonderful and terrible. To think it took her this long to finally understand, once and for all, what it all meant.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnNFajSkPYL
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To understand who her mother truly was, what her mother felt, what her mother desired for her—and how her mother hurt.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvSSqLTTID3
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You’re special, Karin. She would tell her sometimes, her eyes half-lidded and afflicted by thoughts she would never get the chance to say aloud. One day, you will realize that.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqusrBDiWBY
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She realized it, now; what it meant to love to her roots, what it meant to be a woman.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFCghKIqbxO
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An Uzumaki woman.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDbL7EFSi4
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“… Thank you, Karin.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNLB2DJKTSv
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“Idiot,” she shakes her head, weakly, traitorous tears prickling at the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill. “That... should be my line.”
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“They will be here soon,”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHUO6p49oc
“Who will be here soon, mama?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVxbi1t3cY
“It could be anyone,” she finally replies, and her hold is steady as she combs through Karin’s hair, “we have long since lost any care for their identities, Karin. What matters is… what their presence means.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjtak1JiGY
“And what is that?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXqLViE5HtQ
Her silence provides the only answer; and Karin wishes it weren’t enough.
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At twenty, Karin celebrates her birthday for the first time in seven years.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoKQJHnQuOk
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And it starts with a soft but firm admittance whispered as she caresses the baby’s nose, all too aware of the pleasant weight of Sasuke’s gaze, of the feelings swirling in his chakra.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt43WZG0qEd
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Hearing them is unexpected, however—and her widened eyes snap to his only to find his lips beginning to curve, his own hand coming to caress her cheek in much the same way she was doing to their son.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCyTC81C2pT
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“W—what was that about?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMS4l9BJcRs
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She asks; some habits are hard to break, and her awkward way of fighting down her embarrassment seemed to be as persistent as ever.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzOz3DjCfYi
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Sasuke doesn’t seem to mind, though. If anything, his smile seems to morph into an amused smirk as he shrugs, noncommittally. “I just felt like saying it, is all.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWc8qsnm721
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“Dumbass,” she mutters, hoping the darkness will hide the way her cheeks have warmed up like bonfires, so reminiscent of her prepubescent days when all she could do was a dream she would one day lay with Sasuke the way she does now. “...You didn't need to.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeeuBGb8gH2
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“I know, Karin,” and this time he is positively smiling, suddenly mutating back into the Sasuke that had stolen her heart so many years ago. “But it still felt good to say it.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ00p7BFm07h
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Karin says nothing in response; simply snuggles closer to him, eyes on the baby as he opens his eyes and blinks, his little hands curling and uncurling up into the air.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9fj9XTbVst
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“He is going to be strong,” Sasuke assesses, and Karin would have mocked him by how ridiculous it was that he sounds that proud of Itachi when the baby hasn’t even said his first word yet, weren’t it because she felt the same way.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtUfT54hxTn
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He was going to be strong. A little piece of herself and Sasuke—a memento of those who had given their life up for them; a torch for those who had granted them the chance to live this moment.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOo8jg5RSSy
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To live this happiness.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmvneojjns
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“Happy birthday, Itachi,” she whispers, and squeezes Sasuke’s hand. “I love you.”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eudnIJYRW
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The words feel dusty, and unknown—but familiar.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRLfqBkQCdi
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She knew them, once.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZikOEnpFb9
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She has known them all along.
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I'm sorry, Karin.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bzi7UN0HY
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Were the last words her mother told her before her father ushered her out of the house and prompted her to run—run as far as she could, away from them—and forced her to leave them to die.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMZ9QD4kNWZ
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To survive.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGT1SwsaO9
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Those words used to hunt Karin down in those nights when sleep refused to lend her its hand, the eerie walls of Orochimaru’s hideout caving in on her and Sasuke’s steady chakra being her only relief, her only shield.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdTgmXSQ7ZE
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Yet, what haunted her weren’t the words themselves, but their meaning; Karin had instinctively known then, just as clear as she knows now, that her mother was not apologizing for forcing her to forsake them and live on.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj7Bow6pjae
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No, that was not it—that was not the kind of woman her mother had been.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqG21ix4k5c
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Instead, she had apologized for something else entirely.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZAffhw9yB
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For the unsaid.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRQqiqkHxf
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“What are you thinking about, Karin?”470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAuvk5YW3TG
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Her lips curl upward as he takes the seat by her side, repentances fading away into the evening sky.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ99tdjXew9B
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“Nothing,” she replies, threading her fingers through his and gazing back to their children, who were laughing and running together through the backyard, a lively mixture of reds and blacks; the Uchiha and Uzumaki crests proudly etched on their backs, on their hearts.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCdo2JqupH
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“Nothing at all.”
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"You will be fine."470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfO3psEQAu
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And through the tears and the pain and the loneliness and the longing and the hardships and the fear, Karin should have known better.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Qvw18KFia
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Her mother was always right.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibcbtmHaR0
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end.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv84TelZdfs
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I... seriously don't know where all this came from; my best guess: Uzumaki feelings. Uzumaki feelings everywhere. lol, I tried to play with the different facets of Karin, and how she grows into each one of them; plus SK, of course.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5RaSJflojZ
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The stuff I wrote here is not quite how I see things going, though; to do that I would have had to write about 395749574 vignettes per year, rather than only one lol so I went for rushed versions of a couple of scenarios I had thought about.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ12iEhvnIyD
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Oh and while I did not state it in the fic: every vignette takes place on Karin's birthday, so the baby was born on June 20, too.470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6JqXJnpUf
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Anyway, hopefully, it wasn't that terrible! ♥470Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BK9EdbUCq
tags: fanfic, karin, naruto, sasukarin, sasuke
i'm : 
cheerful
listening to: never let me go - florence + the machine
ns3.21.248.226da2
