I didn’t know what to think of all of this. Until one hour ago, I had been having the time of my life with Valentina on our sixth monthiversary of our once-and-forever reunion after a few years apart. But after she went back home looking for something she had forgotten to bring to our dinner... Well, I had told her not to worry too much, but deep inside I knew how important her gift to me was for her. But then, she didn’t come back.
I wasn’t sure what could’ve possibly happened that would have made her not show up yet, and the thought of something sinister was eating me inside. The thought of losing her, again...
So after a while vainly waiting for her, I started asking almost every single person we both knew (our best friends, some school partners, teachers, family members) if they had seen her recently or if she was at their places. The more hopeless replies filling in my messages inbox, the more lost, desperate, worried and angry I was getting. Her parents, Jorge and Estefania, obviously noticed that and decided to stay by my side during the next half an hour until getting some clue of what could’ve happened or where she could be at.
“Hey, everything will be OK, dear” Estefania tried to calm me down. “If something we could be sure of, is that Val knows how to defend herself. Of course, it’s alright to worry about someone you love, and we can see that you love our daughter by the look in your eyes when you think or talk about her or in your determination to find out what is happening to her now that she’s probably missing... But worrying too much will drive you insane and, therefore, it’ll cloud your judgment.”
I took a deep breath. Maybe she was right about it, but I still couldn’t manage to calm my nerves.
“Hun, I know what you’re thinking” Jorge said, slightly startling me. “I know it’s very hard, believe me. But as my wife said, worrying more much than we should isn’t healthy and will drive us nowhere.”
“I know it” I doubtfully answered, “but I’m afraid of losing her again. Believe me, if that son of a bitch is somehow involved in her being missing... I won’t rest until giving him a piece of my mind.”
I didn’t know what came over me, but as I was saying that, it hit me: Valentina could be in real danger if Javier, her ex-boyfriend, was wandering around the city. Her parents looked at me, startled at first, but then I thought of something... very risky.
“I know what we should do” I said convincingly. “Let’s call Valentina’s phone. I know Javier fears me to death, despite talking shit about me behind my back, so I’ll be the one talking on the phone. I won’t need to pry too much to get to talk with Val. Do you have a way to track her location?”
They nodded in agreement, though I could sense how worried and terrified they were by the look in their eyes.
“Well, I want to do this for her, but it’s alright if you think otherwise” I added, trying to consider their wishes too.
“It’s your call, love” Estefania answered.
“We’ll support you, Agus” reassured Jorge, patting me on my right shoulder.
I thought of all the possibilities and outcomes of this sudden plan, the pros and cons... Everything. It was a huge risk to take, but I couldn’t stand being here doing nothing when my girlfriend was still missing, her life possibly on the line.
“Well guys, let’s do this” I said, determined. "Let's start getting Valentina back."
***
One hour and a half of desperation. Ninety minutes of pain. Over 5,400 seconds of constant physical and psychological violence. At this point, I felt defenceless, worthless, fragile... Like my body and mind had already given up. I had reached my lowest point.
“Now you look like a real woman” Javier whispered in my ears, sending shivers down my spine.
As he continued punching and kicking me as if I was a box bag, my thoughts were on the people that mattered the most to me: Agustina, my best friends from La Paz and Santa Fe City, my family, my neighbours... But only thinking of the girl that held my heart and kept it safe gave me hope that I could make it alive from this frightening situation. Suddenly, a soft warmth embraced me completely, spreading itself along my skin. Giving me the strength and courage I needed. Making all my worries and fears vanish.
And as if fate had received a call to intervene to my favour, my phone, which Javier had taken away from me, started ringing. As I couldn’t still speak, I glanced at him to convince him to pick it up. After long twenty seconds of doubts and swearing words, he finally accepted the call. But even though I was expecting her to call, I wasn’t prepared emotionally for that yet.
“Listen to me, buddy!” said Agustina, determined to get what she wanted. “Whether you like it or not, you’ll do as I say! Now put Valentina on the phone, and don’t think of doing otherwise! Understood?”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My girl, full of renewed confidence, was speaking so clearly and naturally to my assailant... My heart was beating faster and faster so that it could jump off my chest anytime.
“Be quick, bitch” he answered in a tone that screamed disagreement. Then he uncovered my mouth so that I could speak.
He turned on the loudspeaker mode so that he could listen to our conversation too.
“Agustina!” I cried out loud, failing to hold back my tears. “I’m so sorry for letting you down.”
"Ko'u aloha, none of this is your fault” she reassured me. “Look, I don’t have much time, so I’ll say just one thing more before hanging up: keep fighting as best as I know you can, because I will fight for you as well as I could. I love you so much, Val, and I’m sorry I can’t do much to help you.”
Even though I felt a bit disappointed because of what she said, just hearing her voice and knowing that she was alright was enough for me. I smiled for the first time since I got here.
“I love you with my entire life” I answered. “I promise to keep fighting, for us. You promise too?”
“Cross my heart” she said. And then, she hung up. Although I wasn’t sure of seeing her again, I had hope of breaking away safe and sound. I just had to fight a little more.
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