84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ELXxq2Fxb
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhoHX5qVWJF
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcsu5HOUSY
0184Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKdfDtQPdGl
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyuEOKlS2kw
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLOwLQZaclm
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2hU14FdPr
赤羽業一如往常的沖泡咖啡加奶精加糖，他慣於在這時候放空腦袋休息，即便是在這時候，他依然如此。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsD1vu8Lot8
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYAWOocoiVK
攪拌咖啡時他看見自己的倒影迴轉在波紋中，意外的竟可以清晰反射出他面部的表情，是一個相當平靜的情緒，他本以為自己會是一副靜靜發著怒火的神情，然而，事實並非如此。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnylciVcYd
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqRV0QKqpCf
和表情同樣，他的內心此刻也靜謐的像火種熄滅似的，只有一縷青煙騰空散去。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSQPjV41Do
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2f3Hm820I4
他不禁想，自己比起中學時候確實是成熟了些——尤其在看到娛樂版頭條醒目的標語之後，還能做些和普通日常無異的行為，而不是在那裡懊惱與憤恨——自己單戀了十幾年的人和當紅女明星傳出緋聞，作為證據，報導還放上兩人前往某溫泉旅館時的同遊照片。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0YYZu8aXwk
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ThbGucPhb
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzUxdoNb62G
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ48nThIjhBT
赤羽業啜飲著咖啡醒腦，明天他有一場重要的議會質詢，為了這場質詢，他能掌握的資料都已經準備妥當，務必成功達陣。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDE8aC8qee5
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡENlnasSJbA
在迅速打著資料重點時，赤羽業想起以前看過的動畫，裡面一句台詞就是在說明成熟與不成熟的差異，成熟的人接受事實不再反抗，不成熟的人則繼續頑強抵抗。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBCHiSeUshd
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorxLAHyR8v
若然是以前的自己，肯定是會選擇反抗吧，然而自己並沒有選擇那樣幼稚的作法，大概就是成熟。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSL42wr1RH8
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyz9D1tClAg
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmoMuPqfklJ
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXUqhB2pIUI
身後傳來同事們閱讀報紙之後的各種驚呼，他聞所未聞，繼續著自己的工作。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKYtW7xt12B
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLYMHRJKI72
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCaVsOf9eL
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Q1PWSUaFj
0284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqrUbXFQaHc
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp2fi2UoFYg
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2m2ZkSRT0
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRQ7OIZFRX3
過了二十五歲之後，除了工作，赤羽業經常回想的就是一些有關於潮田渚的相處片段。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBCbT9juLA4
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwn2K0DYJxi
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzKUorLacMp
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4CfPf43p2f
最初只是一個留著長髮、綁著馬尾、笑起來有些虛幻的少年，放眼望去很容易在眾人中淹沒的稀薄存在感，卻因那時的偶然，令他目光全然留在他身上。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9LMLCd99d
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqJcjegDl21
赤羽業從來沒有對潮田渚說過，他對他最初的印象來自於某個放學後的黃昏教室，當時他出了校門憶起遺漏了作業本，便趕緊回教室欲拿取，剛好教室大門尚未關上，他正要踏入之時卻被眼前景緻停住腳步——逢魔時刻的色彩渲染整間教室，在他目光所及之處的人，綁著馬尾，藍色髮絲裡滲透著金黃色，背對著他。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTcmjU82uP
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwlFE3AC6i
彷彿愛麗絲的兔子洞，誘惑著好奇的孩子一探究竟。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSjqKnIf2xC
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVEwi4OGB9p
日後，他經常回想的就是那樣的場景，靜謐的時刻裡，看著遠方夕陽沈落的少年。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHabUPrHStA
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJugEtPAhK
假如那時候，更靠近些，或許便能得知少年那時在思考的事情了吧。 84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OzI2cADNo
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6jBdtd2i2
赤羽業不只一次地這麼揣想。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaG6vdpy5uU
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1QFueC6aH7
更靠近些，也就更能了解少年了，或者，讓少年想靠近自己，這份從那時便持續的單戀或許就能劃下結果——無論是否如願，至少不用懷抱揣想，一驚一顫地。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx21StTMx5b
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNTXgan91Ir
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVykXKGIdY7
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IRb1JLdKf
0384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskpb6eLgvi
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1lrhSHgWN
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtkOOeZG1Q
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5kVX7QQNg2
結束了一整天的工作，赤羽業走出辦公室時已滿天星斗。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUINfpL8Ink
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYl0Bc6WE7F
冷咧的風吹來，寒的讓人哆嗦，迎風而行的他卻忽然笑了，抑不可止的笑了，剝落了從早上就武裝的情緒笑了。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGSesZmqHzJ
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOgL8jCw2f
隨著緊繃情緒忽然的潰堤，他感覺到溫熱的液體從自己的臉龐滑落。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSxaLyls0Z
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRO1yvKLfR7
他想自己的確是很難受，不然一向不輕易落淚的他怎會突然無法阻止地不斷掉淚，弔詭是自己臉上還是一副笑容，而他知道自己是真心地露出笑容的。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsErBrOCOsr
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwGT2LrU1r9
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIgET19WrP
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZza2pZ3I6
原來，再怎麼了解自己，終究還是會有無法理解的地方——就像小說角色因各種情緒的混雜那樣，他又笑又哭。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZYOSW7KQ1
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs0r82fHjk2
而他以為自己不會。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSZ5Zr3Gxn
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1tEVUEjQRH
他本來以為自己不會的。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3MAoNmQL2E
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0j5jzunej
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNu8tOH5ksw
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKxuIaNQxIQ
不過就是喜歡的人似乎有了喜歡的對象，而那個對象偏偏不是自己罷了，沒什麼大不了的。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOypLsQEmAZ
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWvBHEwaTAt
沒什麼大不了的，不是嗎？84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0XGFn3o71
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4bPxXIRz9
不是嗎？84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHcAonCq6a
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XKn2Uscks
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFQNcV0Ln56
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmh9RcARGeX
0484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5Xtjfrt7U
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjyO4RB9MKk
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxKCEXxBgX
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQkfmjSh8GY
赤羽業中學之後常常會夢到潮田渚。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7qWuVjnv5y
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZgdCyCoc4i
綁著馬尾的他，升上中學三年級之後的他，留著短髮的他。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gSDR14njw
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3seSBXwweN
無論哪一個他，只要看到他，潮田渚都會露出笑容往他而來，並說著美妙的話語，是只能在夢裡聽見的情話。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhVDJcbxZGK
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIAgZZfgr7D
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90Fi1gDeKt
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLMkAGdy33F
所以，在住家周圍見到早上才在報紙裡看到的人出現的時候，赤羽業恍惚還以為自己疲累到走著睡著了——尤其，對方還一臉笑容的往自己走過來時，簡直重現了夢境場景。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YVKQxDwxf
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOv2RNFHKch
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXJwgbvF4WT
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7CN7beBGO
「業，你今天好晚回來啊。」84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZAGTsLMYvq
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFH1akY9vbA
雖然擺著一張笑容，然而赤羽業敏銳感覺到那笑顏下潛藏著的疲憊。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwETj3TijB1
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlyUUFD4Vwk
啊啊，是這麼回事嗎？84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGysDbmR2NR
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuK2VtdefV
難得的，赤羽業對自己洞悉人性這一點感到厭惡。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcAOQTP7FcC
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuXexsguMI
「明天有重要的質詢，所以剛剛還在處理。」他頓了頓，並沒想戳破什麼地裝傻「渚，這麼晚了，你怎麼會來呢？」84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDGWxYOhjI1
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYT7iYyZLU
「……原來，業沒有看到報紙嗎？」不知道是放心還是懊惱，潮田渚呼了口氣「今天我下班回家時，發現家裡附近躲著好幾個記者，大概是想來打聽些事情吧」言至此，赤羽業難得見到潮田渚露出苦笑「而我的父母貌似也被騷擾了，便傳簡訊讓我今天別回家去別處躲著，等過個幾天就會沒事了。」84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIOB8QilkE
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcwxPZMXQAn
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6pylue7Ia
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3VWf2iNRBu
潮田渚的言詞閃爍，大概是有些顧慮吧。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlHDvAxGXGq
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnS796NjzY5
他並沒有興致去讓自己受傷，因此潮田渚言詞隱蔽的那些內容，儘管他猜得出來，他也不想直接聽到當事人直接說出。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMVX4XSby3
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRbEs0JlAGj
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuMAQHCr3u
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2TPxRTlMIu
「所以，你想在我這裡待個幾天，是這樣的意思嗎？」他直接點出結論。確實自己之前經常拖著潮田渚灌酒，家裡是有一些渚的換洗衣物跟被子。要是他是渚也會選擇一樣的事情，一來不用花錢住在酒店裡，二來也比較方便。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsMkZU1MRnS
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ma9oSmMYf
「對，畢竟，我沒有其他可以拜託的人了。」84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY7RxwEqdZ7
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQSdJHH0UrH
赤羽業聽了之後直覺渚在說謊，然而卻找不出任何感覺奇怪的地方。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZrQPlpddn
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaf3eUZ2ytK
要論交情，自己的確是可以勝任的，然而說找不到人可以拜託？E班的感情在共經患難之後，是非常堅實的，除了自己之外，渚還有很多人可以拜託，想必他們也會十分樂意的（當然，肯定包含看戲的成份）。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6L3oYUSQYV
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7wucSYSXo
只是，渚的為難似乎也是真的，他似乎是真的找不到其他可以拜託的人——是以，才會沒有任何告知，就跑來他家外面等他，而他甚至不知道他會幾點回來地在寒風中等著。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDC4q1L2Vc
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWvFg8hf28O
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1DHkQlYEA
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vOOxmmg7m
「我知道了，你就在我這裡躲個幾天吧。」84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDfrLRrw6W
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxB3blcVqef
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJAaYDao3Bf
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNozRAy1PU
赤羽業有時會想，假如記憶可以回放，那麼潮田渚在他應允之後的那個畫面，他肯定會重溫數次——潮田渚喜出望外地抱住他，透過衣服傳來的溫熱，他曉得渚十分高興，雖然他還感覺到更深層次的欣喜，而那個欣喜在之後才能明白。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz6jNeAmlBG
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeltDhFDOFi
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5KMKpc1Zx6
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt7cSvSlzHq
當時的他僅僅是以為渚對於他讓他躲在他家裡這件事情感謝而已，直到後來發現誤會一場，他聽見和夢裡一樣的話語時，他才明白那時感覺到的謊言與欣喜的意義。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTwN2vG0Eym
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7c6GT9BFqb
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNIk6Spsc8
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUo71KUSSi
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5FBptdY4F8
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbUw4pKfCNI
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EH6kPbps9
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRNiWwajcEP
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqp2D81b4bM
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ39gR3CAxoW
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8obQNvgQIm
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKLTaMWkNO
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOizlD4jlHL
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82H9wEU1se
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsGJmmUBeZ
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZVG3KbFOVN
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlAyI2Oc68c
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnMMU9Z44Zh
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVrCAcULcF
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4raKV82Bm
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh00ZWXAVUX
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW7srW978K3
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡniZHOPxzei
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU9O6bVxURv
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3fxX3Ybn5
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2NQkBykFTP
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***84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSBW59POgHe
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7Qo8gEwLD
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8ksSQBgqc
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXtnv30JnE
「二十五歲時，赤羽業看見了自己單戀的人出現在報紙的版面上，那是一個和女明星緋聞的版面。從十三歲和少年相遇的時候，他這一份單戀就開始了。直到年老，他從來也沒說出口。沒有人知道的戀情不存在，所以他只是陪在潮田渚的身邊，他陪了多久，這份單戀就多久。六十五歲時，赤羽業還是陪在喜歡的人身邊。直到老死前，他都沒有說出口。」84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJxDY8bfJW
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9TAtr1a7S
以上是我寫文的最初動機與結構。以業的角度出發的單戀，只是，業對於這份戀情並沒有想放手一搏，以致於他和渚的關係始終在非常奇妙的情況。原設定中的渚也並沒有結婚，從業的角度無法知道渚的內心，所以並不能明白渚不結婚的原因。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTdBRCK0yMe
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLT5hcwsIJs
不過寫文寫著就會出現慣性，所以最後還是回到不太遺憾的層面。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ywWL1h1GU
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4jfltM7TB
以前跟徘徊討論過，對於業渚，業必須處於主動才能得到好結果，假如兩個都沒有意識到，儘管遺憾但也不太虐，然而一方清醒一方迴避，那就有趣了。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe4AHoLzpST
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvgyMSP0GM5
這文章大概有涉及到這一層面的討論。84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbpYsRKZ6Ow
84Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx2Q7X5EHea
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