在我所說的的穩聊對象中,最後那位被我稱之為風獅爺的,當然,他不可能姓風名獅爺,又或是姓迷名唇姊,那是他的綽號。99Please respect copyright.PENANAQt1OXMb3Un
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但在這則故事裡,我都會以風獅爺或迷唇姊稱之,因為這樣才最符合日常生活中的我們。99Please respect copyright.PENANAWj4A6A96MO
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迷唇姊,留著一頭過肩長髮,有著兩片的厚厚香腸嘴,身材大概是圓的那種,你要把前一句的大概去掉也不是不能。99Please respect copyright.PENANAt0SS3ZJnrt
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最佳的形容詞就是,嗯,迷唇姊。99Please respect copyright.PENANAvjQjSVc858
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至於綽號來源,尚請我娓娓道來。99Please respect copyright.PENANAeGwWaGRt8s
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人到了一定年紀,就會開始懷念,而身為高中生的我們,真要說懷念的事情,那還真是不少,畢竟學習階段的我們,往往是長大的我們所羨慕的。99Please respect copyright.PENANARduqoPbil2
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這外號還得拜我們班有個長的很像從窯坑出來,全身塗滿木炭叫杜宗達的人所賜。99Please respect copyright.PENANAQuLQIOZO0S
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杜宗達是個很妙的人,怎樣個妙法?99Please respect copyright.PENANAeAgQFmhhMz
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剛開學時,男生總愛湊在一起,討論著自己過去的事蹟,討論著誰國中的女朋友身材比較好,長的比較漂亮,而當我們問到他時,他總以一句我的女友在美國來結束對他的質問。99Please respect copyright.PENANALhjiFpaao8
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母胎單的各位請學起來,以後別人問你有沒有男女朋友,一律回答在外國就對了。99Please respect copyright.PENANAveH2YeL6HS
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高一上,他的志願是陽明醫學系,過了半學期,他的志願從醫學系變成了警大,再等到我下次聽到,他的志願又變成要考警專了,然後讀書不去圖書館,而是跟別人約在電影院的門口的座位。99Please respect copyright.PENANAEIqpUXLtOg
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最妙的是,他還有種與生俱來的優越感,他總覺得自己的話是真理,他的笑話大多時候只有他捧場自己,就是這種無可救藥的笨蛋,我竟然跟他結交成好朋友,實在是感嘆。99Please respect copyright.PENANAFVg7Tg5Jy4
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抱歉,我好像花太多篇幅在幹譙杜宗達了,請拉回正題。99Please respect copyright.PENANAMPH7o1l1fP
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在某天一個糟糕透頂的下午,不知道怎麼搞的,這天爛下午突然聊到了神奇寶貝,正當大家都很興高彩烈的說著自己以前自己有著什麼神奇寶貝卡、鬥片(我應該還沒有老到跟這社會脫節,大家應該知道鬥片是什麼吧......)時,杜宗達又在他的無限跳針日常。99Please respect copyright.PENANAzeWFBLKwVC
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「0,你跟催眠貘長的超像。」99Please respect copyright.PENANAGJknJdzfjS
「0,你就是一隻呆呆獸,你永遠不會變成呆呆王。」99Please respect copyright.PENANARwfqLzn7GH
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0是他的口禪,而像這樣毫無營養的對話內容就是他的每天日常,偏偏他的嗓門極大,想不聽都難。99Please respect copyright.PENANAAls8OQwou7
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也正因為他的嗓門極大,正當他還自得其樂替班上的人想所謂的神奇寶貝綽號,這時那位和我穩聊的迷唇姊,以超越光速的速度,手刀直奔前來。99Please respect copyright.PENANAmGmTFI4kIf
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「哈哈哈哈哈,你是催眠貘。」99Please respect copyright.PENANATqLC1up5tM
「哈哈哈哈哈哈,你是耿鬼。」99Please respect copyright.PENANANiyYfcwoci
「哈哈哈哈哈哈哈,你是呆河馬。」99Please respect copyright.PENANApZK1d1IuXa
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迷唇姊是個很不會看臉色說話的人,我可以保證。99Please respect copyright.PENANAkk2zCIhYFX
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在大家莫名被杜宗達胡鬨一場後,本就有些無奈甚至是些憤慨,無奈在於他是我們的朋友,憤慨則是想反擊杜宗達又顧及朋友之情只好作罷,而迷唇姊就這麼撞在槍口上,於是阿哲率先發難。99Please respect copyright.PENANAhFbVnFhqo3
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「你說,他是催眠貘,他是耿鬼,我是呆河馬,你有沒有想過你挺像迷唇姊。」99Please respect copyright.PENANAbKeXLIcgZQ
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老實說,我不記得當天迷唇姊的表情了,應該說我來不及看到,因為當阿哲講完他長得像迷唇姊時,剛剛的陰霾似乎被一掃而空,迎接而來的是大家爽朗的笑聲,大家都笑的像是條雞母蟲樣只能在地上按著肚子蠕動,至於迷唇姊則是臉上一陣青一陣白的,於是綽號就這麼傳開了。99Please respect copyright.PENANAvCI4I6US8X
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雖然這個外號是阿哲取的,但這個爛下午,如果沒有杜宗達亂取綽號,就不會有迷唇姊的出現了,所以我認為這必須怪杜宗達。99Please respect copyright.PENANAwdy2rWnC90
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至於風獅爺,這鍋可能就要阿哲自己扛了,在某堂地理課,老師在介紹金門的戰地風光,然後阿哲就爆出了一句,迷唇姊你綽號可以考慮新增一個風獅爺了,你的體積比風獅爺還要大,應該更能擋風。99Please respect copyright.PENANAIRbpGOPt9u
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阿哲真的很北爛。99Please respect copyright.PENANAVgYC8wXQMB
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這節地理課,又是一個大家像隻雞母蟲在地上捧著肚子蠕動的一天,又是一個迷唇姊臉上一陣青一陣白的一天。99Please respect copyright.PENANAIZSEObyQYv
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但憑心而論,風獅爺真的對我挺好。99Please respect copyright.PENANAfh12aCNJXb
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他對我好的事蹟,就留到後面再出場吧。99Please respect copyright.PENANAoIZ9YSmyOD
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待續,不知不覺這篇故事也已寫了八千餘字,在寫的同時,我腦海中的高中故事片段也不停的串聯起來,這種感覺好快樂。99Please respect copyright.PENANAqGqygxqRLC
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也謝謝閱讀的各位。99Please respect copyright.PENANAyebHQdumlq