我說：『老闆什麼時候加薪！』29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtUKt2lRCHB
－－摘錄自《坑坑企業201ｘ年傑出業務員》」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJTAnjkvgM7
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楔子29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq61bYZRY3w
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「……感謝賜稿，很抱歉，大作未能留用，祈諒。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhhdbwbEYkH
盼能繼續支持、愛護本刊。耑此敬祝29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Lt8rUUseI
文安29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYuEmKFJWu
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xx上」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrm5Z3Eob0
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一名少年漫不經心的走在夏日灰濛濛的城市街道上，到底是收到多少次這樣的信？……已經不知道要從何數起。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQg4oeQy58v
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離開家已經這麼久，卻……29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUpugV9mOup
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「喂喂！那邊一副要自殺那位同學請過來一下！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJ3Ab6eNaQ
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誰啊？……29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡerZuGXJf56
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「那邊那個！就叫你過來了！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡljlXuPWYIL
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小巷裡沒有別人，我停下腳步。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiMt138tJhL
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我意興闌珊的轉過頭，卻沒看見半個人。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6KliGQsTQ
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大概是我聽錯？…還是被戲弄也說不定，日子夠倒楣了。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXcWbjybjAS
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我繼續往前走。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNAbXdV18QQ
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「…那邊那個給我停下來啦－－－！！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbdHJ8epQQ2
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哇！好痛！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJw9TvWGdL
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我被一個硬物砸到了腦袋，Ｘ的！我生氣了！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbVNlD5OsNz
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「他Ｘ的誰丟老子啊！」我怒吼著轉身去找兇手。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUkFvjelfjq
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但髒兮兮的小巷子裡靜悄悄的，若不是還隱約聽得見遠處馬路上嘈雜的聲響，又是大白天，我還真以為自己…遇到……29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7WUFRrgDzk
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQJuZmVQ34
「呸呸呸！本大爺才不是什麼不乾淨的東西，我昨天才從乾洗店回來耶！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcq5Bc6aPfn
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這次聲音很近，卻什麼都沒有看見，我整個人呆掉了。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsOv9wmGeMl
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhSrX7CFup
「低下頭啦！笨蛋，你是眼睛有問題嗎？」褲子上傳來小小的拉力，我茫然的低下頭，看見一隻米白色，毛茸茸的拉布拉多娃娃在扯我的褲腳。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCVbR8rlbqJ
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「快！交出你口袋裡的五十元金幣。」它說，小小的尾巴興奮的甩動。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC89g3y34e9
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0mPHDSwxrz
「才不要，那是我的午餐錢耶！」我反射性的喊道，不過在看見他那黑色的眼珠子笑得咪成彎月狀時，我就知道我又不打自招了。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvF8yLVRi9
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「嘿嘿…我的鼻子對於五十元金幣的氣味最靈敏了，果然沒錯！」它自豪的用後腿人立起來，不過他的腳實在很短，現在動作是在…手插腰？29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1gSiCWQMj
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算了，我應該是在作白日夢，居然會在台Ｘ市遇到會說話的布偶，再不快點去打工搞不好又要被開除……29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIAn33qjd9t
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我轉身就要走，卻又被這隻狗玩偶拉住。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXnz1Pg3Yl
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「……你到底想幹嘛？」蠢透了，我居然還在跟它說話！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv6vjmD1aSc
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「咳咳！我說啊，看你一副失魂落魄的樣子，一定是被退稿了吧？」它兩手抱胸，一副跩樣。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDKPx0enm7
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「你怎麼會知道。」我馬上警戒起來。大概是被我搶早餐搶太多次的阿頁找了什麼精通機械的駭客來對付我，連我收到的信都知道！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1cJjTQ4YJ
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「嘿嘿…犬大爺我之前經手的業務遇到的每個客戶都是你這副衰樣！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ84zu5Qlbrf
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「…真是夠了，連狗娃娃都欺負我……」我從沒這麼消沉過，等一下去找店長辭職吧…回去當啃老族被恥笑也算了，但是我抬起腳要跨步的時候，一台破舊的扭蛋機突然矗立在我面前。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZeG9rJTj1
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「你是想要我玩這個？」我冷冷的說，那隻狗娃娃得意的曲著短腿跳到扭蛋機上，說：「就是這個！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRQmMUzeTAQ
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNFoOAjnTJE
「交出你的五十元金幣，保證你不會後悔。」滿是笑意與自信的聲音，我好像可以看見它毛茸茸的臉上有張笑得很開心的嘴。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsbXmQwunQ
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可是……29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGr2KHaWHlB
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「它貼著『故障』耶…」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvW2elJyDxV
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「欸欸！你是沒看過啊利波特嗎？」它不耐煩的揮著一隻短腿說：「還是你已經連碰運氣的勇氣都沒有了？」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKLxUympCj
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「……我投！！」不知道為什麼，它帶著輕蔑的語氣激起了我的怒火。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKeDgIUiq4d
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不吃午餐算什麼！我昨天連早餐都只搶到半個三明治！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4HIid0Ujb
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我衝動的從口袋裡拿出我最後的五十元金幣，塞進投幣口，捏住扳手用力一轉－－29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVJkaMP0yek
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吭啷。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrVm85JVV3V
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什麼都沒有。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbkJ5tvEkX
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「告非！還我的午餐費來啊啊啊啊－－－－！！」我最後一絲的自制力「啪」的斷掉，我氣得用力踹了一腳那台扭蛋機。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡceTYZxdn8H
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaUfoWaRgbc
結果可想而知，我遇到了這種怪事，那台扭蛋機只是晃了一下，我卻整個人飛往後飛了至少三公尺，換來了痛的好像裂掉的屁股和五根腳趾頭。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡknnLD9jdw7
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwU8mhMjqCv
「痛痛痛痛……！」我難受的閉著眼抱著腳縮成一團，怒吼：「臭狗！我一定要宰了你！」但四周完全安靜。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX1IhHcqAaL
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我睜開眼，那隻狗娃娃和扭蛋機都不見了！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoAJUO1MDb
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連一點蛛絲馬跡都沒有。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkUcWbB0IcJ
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「我…這是做夢嗎？」我伸手往口袋摸去，五十元金幣並不在。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPKLeL4Eol
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「他爺爺的…這年頭的周公也缺錢花嗎！！」我怨恨的幾乎要哭出來。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiYkBt1p9ZS
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倒楣。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡemxub7E6aD
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真夠倒楣！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFdIbsAJin
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我看我真的去死一死好了，這種沒價值的人生…這種日子……29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkRdDCipvd
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這種日子過得好痛苦……29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Ogx9q029a
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一陣冰冷的觸感從我的腳踝傳來。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ92o46gbdSL
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這次又是什麼？29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuW3Qb6QCvN
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我勉強透過模糊的視線分辨著抓住我的白色的東西，白白的東西從人行道邊邊的排水孔的鐵柵裡伸出來，好像…是一隻人手？29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQwcRgM7YL
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「咿咿咿咿！放開我啊啊啊－－！」我發出尖叫用力的往後縮，但那隻手卻越抓越緊－－29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBRR4UqydlG
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrhLIrKGWt
「你是腦袋進水嗎！」一個哀怨的聲音尖叫著從裡面傳來：「過份的人類！人家第一次出『廠』就這麼狼狽，居然是在水溝裡面耶！我都沒尖叫你在尖叫什麼啦！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyg0EhPa1Fc
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡecNV9o52Js
「可是你已經尖叫了啊！」我腦袋一片空白的喊回去。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdg0YdG5Fv4
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「還不是因為你一直叫！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMcjIJEGsre
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「那是因為你抓著我不放我當然會嚇到啊啊－－！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObb66tKG3Q
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「我不抓住你你一定會跑掉！」他生氣的道。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hrPKpZVyn
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「我、我我保證我不會跑！」天殺的！這傢伙到底什麼來頭！29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmGV9MmDYmt
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「你發誓？」那個聲音問。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDmdDzTrgjF
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「我發誓，對我的良心。」雖然我自己都不知道我有沒有。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhDcz0kF8X
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「讓我想想，我媽說你們人類都不太能信任。」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjGTY9bOfjP
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「只要你會放開手就都好說。」畢竟也過了一會兒，我也比較鎮靜了些，至少那隻手的主人似乎沒有要傷害我的意思。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLDWbb9i2k
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大概半分鐘，他說：「好啦！我等一下把『門』丟上去，你一定要給我接好。」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEWcNVwohr8
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「沒問題。」我答。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMxvVgHZuy
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不過顯然他還是不放心，惡狠狠的補道：「要不然我就從你的馬桶鑽出來！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrPVBv6OW6
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我吞了口口水，看著那隻手鬆開我的腳踝，然後一顆藍白色的扭蛋從鐵柵的隙縫中飛出來。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHk3Ag8vf0
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGoeknSevL
我急忙撲過去，檢起了那顆扭蛋。幾乎就在撿起來，抬頭的同時，我看見了對面巷子口，一隻…肚子開了一個大洞的白色狗娃娃，正緊張的喊「別跑！快回來啊！」滿地爬的撿回扭蛋，塞進肚子裡的畫面。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzqgwdF6xHu
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……原來是這樣子，姑且不論扭蛋機，難怪我剛才找不到它。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRo1wlKJkt
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就在我有點恍然大悟的時候，手上的扭蛋裡傳出了一個悶悶的聲音：「喂！人類，你仔細聽好了，我是來自坑坑魔界的坑坑魔王一族的文蜻，叫我文蜻大人就可以了，今天起我會督促你乖乖填好你那些文坑，給我記清楚了！」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpz9wsNy0gy
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「你說啥？」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwFWd8PGNGf
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我聽得一頭霧水，不過手上捧著的扭蛋突然自己打開了。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0L2u4pQSek
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一個個子嬌小黑色長髮，金色眼睛，穿著奇怪長袍，看不出男女的小孩子氣鼓鼓的盤坐在扭蛋裡面瞪著我。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDsgd1sdl7A
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「報上名來！」他高傲的說。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCbCmfFmzq6
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「呃…金稻水。」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfkGJtTxVOR
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「噗！」他笑了起來，我承認我的名字很…好笑。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnJpAPiQ62v
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「阿金，你只須要明白一件事。」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKurMNEf3Ax
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「什麼事？」我聽天由命。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWwVPUj0F2
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJQvr27eVu
「那就是，你沒有好好填坑滿足我，我會讓你活在整天被催文趕稿的修羅場裡。」他笑得很天真，不過有夠邪惡的。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdF6geZ5FZ
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqvtxKOtSw
所以我花了五十元轉出了一個催文大隊長還是變態惡編輯？29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ32XZdbd2PV
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgOE7nMHXk
「要知道，我能不能順利通過程年禮『羽化』都要看你坑有沒有好好按時填好，內容太差我也不會放水的，一直到幫你登上完稿的巔峰前，我都不會離開你。」他認真的態度，不知道為什麼我竟有點感動。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrV298V5Wn2
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslQzWokNFK
「我會加油的。」我忍不住擦了擦眼角。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYePalhMBHN
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhuFE6VeHpw
「這種反應才對嘛！不要看到本殿下像看到魔王怪物似的……」他打了個大大的呵欠，說：「我要先休息了，沒想到第一次到人界就要化成人形…你可要好好想想今天填坑的內容啊。」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLR1cNupXQ
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWX6vduPko9
說完，他闔上了扭蛋的蓋子。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWdpQ9c2XmX
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RboDRcmWx
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoac474SmHf
今天，我在台Ｘ市的巷子裡遇到了推銷扭蛋的狗布偶，花了五十元買了腳痛和擦傷，還有手上的這個自稱是什麼來自坑坑魔界的怪異生物，說要幫助我登上什麼巔峰。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjckG37hKc1
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrfoQ4L0Q9
但是這種怪事說出去了誰會相信呢？29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX45Em9opSi
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCyVQdJXfM
扭蛋傳來輕響：「…不准給我偷懶啊！阿金。」29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJElqTJ0Etr
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsKnTsHCrYy
呵！真是睡意濃厚的聲音。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4mUsNFAyWf
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8nJmnFgaTv
說不定，我的五十元金幣真的沒白花。29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGs0slNAUT
29Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHHChzjn3gt
（楔子完）ns216.73.216.192da2
