我說：『老闆什麼時候加薪！』40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNYsD6y2mN
－－摘錄自《坑坑企業201ｘ年傑出業務員》」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3UMpGKNwAV
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楔子40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH094UPj4yz
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「……感謝賜稿，很抱歉，大作未能留用，祈諒。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Ud7dJpU9Q
盼能繼續支持、愛護本刊。耑此敬祝40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUDxKMoPl2
文安40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx3zXy2EQfd
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xx上」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ53MjcD2ONp
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一名少年漫不經心的走在夏日灰濛濛的城市街道上，到底是收到多少次這樣的信？……已經不知道要從何數起。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡALTIPdS0Dy
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7N0pZ7ycvQ
離開家已經這麼久，卻……40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvfmSfJiHmY
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9I0J8o11So
「喂喂！那邊一副要自殺那位同學請過來一下！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlHVdyV2F3Y
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq4nwEAXYba
誰啊？……40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3oiKTJIrI
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkHNzIE7u6Z
「那邊那個！就叫你過來了！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqDHXJm4XZ
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEBpSDeyw9
小巷裡沒有別人，我停下腳步。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnVWuaHuQA
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyOjE5tS5bk
我意興闌珊的轉過頭，卻沒看見半個人。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN76qpvmkFO
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxCDgS09do
大概是我聽錯？…還是被戲弄也說不定，日子夠倒楣了。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ26bBqu5DoA
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡedyVILAkfx
我繼續往前走。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa79XTl03rg
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArbtO5Nauz
「…那邊那個給我停下來啦－－－！！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpkKC7uq3eT
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPe0OOaid0e
哇！好痛！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU3t56ypetq
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtQ9QcsE6RH
我被一個硬物砸到了腦袋，Ｘ的！我生氣了！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRHr4GLIfV
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOn67zlGCyt
「他Ｘ的誰丟老子啊！」我怒吼著轉身去找兇手。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzCStQep4xc
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbYGvYdo6o
但髒兮兮的小巷子裡靜悄悄的，若不是還隱約聽得見遠處馬路上嘈雜的聲響，又是大白天，我還真以為自己…遇到……40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLMIguTtYlo
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlpRzCgZrCr
「呸呸呸！本大爺才不是什麼不乾淨的東西，我昨天才從乾洗店回來耶！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7D2NORwIbG
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMOuMGUtXn
這次聲音很近，卻什麼都沒有看見，我整個人呆掉了。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPmaZwK5Cld
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaxne6s48ma
「低下頭啦！笨蛋，你是眼睛有問題嗎？」褲子上傳來小小的拉力，我茫然的低下頭，看見一隻米白色，毛茸茸的拉布拉多娃娃在扯我的褲腳。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIIxq0Wzq5P
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxObGXVTqq
「快！交出你口袋裡的五十元金幣。」它說，小小的尾巴興奮的甩動。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VIMhMIehe
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OD1LMwM4E
「才不要，那是我的午餐錢耶！」我反射性的喊道，不過在看見他那黑色的眼珠子笑得咪成彎月狀時，我就知道我又不打自招了。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyaPenlnJls
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvoXZBztJof
「嘿嘿…我的鼻子對於五十元金幣的氣味最靈敏了，果然沒錯！」它自豪的用後腿人立起來，不過他的腳實在很短，現在動作是在…手插腰？40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUkFDLSLGRF
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQG2NVisNsM
算了，我應該是在作白日夢，居然會在台Ｘ市遇到會說話的布偶，再不快點去打工搞不好又要被開除……40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzmIWZXpgVX
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WJJkOoW5A
我轉身就要走，卻又被這隻狗玩偶拉住。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jKTsanqa3
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpiGY1sRenl
「……你到底想幹嘛？」蠢透了，我居然還在跟它說話！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1CqSwFMXX
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiupWddbigd
「咳咳！我說啊，看你一副失魂落魄的樣子，一定是被退稿了吧？」它兩手抱胸，一副跩樣。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLWEympaQJ6
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgha1LfnWwX
「你怎麼會知道。」我馬上警戒起來。大概是被我搶早餐搶太多次的阿頁找了什麼精通機械的駭客來對付我，連我收到的信都知道！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1eUI6FGVJ
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsM0GKOcfbB
「嘿嘿…犬大爺我之前經手的業務遇到的每個客戶都是你這副衰樣！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Yl8w27COX
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe5IRlIROIQ
「…真是夠了，連狗娃娃都欺負我……」我從沒這麼消沉過，等一下去找店長辭職吧…回去當啃老族被恥笑也算了，但是我抬起腳要跨步的時候，一台破舊的扭蛋機突然矗立在我面前。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVz0fWs58s4
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOSZUMVmNwD
「你是想要我玩這個？」我冷冷的說，那隻狗娃娃得意的曲著短腿跳到扭蛋機上，說：「就是這個！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlhud6BorOp
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFYQ34HTIEo
「交出你的五十元金幣，保證你不會後悔。」滿是笑意與自信的聲音，我好像可以看見它毛茸茸的臉上有張笑得很開心的嘴。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEL2gtnQaLm
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可是……40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBRTeLRf0Lu
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLz0qEBjwdM
「它貼著『故障』耶…」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPd4ktRpbi
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7e6Hob5DYm
「欸欸！你是沒看過啊利波特嗎？」它不耐煩的揮著一隻短腿說：「還是你已經連碰運氣的勇氣都沒有了？」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuAwN5BnEp
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoyhvLEAxgj
「……我投！！」不知道為什麼，它帶著輕蔑的語氣激起了我的怒火。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWY0Kk0ktHo
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMxJxtwxs1
不吃午餐算什麼！我昨天連早餐都只搶到半個三明治！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3aFqi2FQfU
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Tan6j8P5p
我衝動的從口袋裡拿出我最後的五十元金幣，塞進投幣口，捏住扳手用力一轉－－40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYarVfZjMbf
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吭啷。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdUslqV5CXC
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什麼都沒有。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbvaFIF8uf
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40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLgaW6kL32
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「告非！還我的午餐費來啊啊啊啊－－－－！！」我最後一絲的自制力「啪」的斷掉，我氣得用力踹了一腳那台扭蛋機。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjT93xNbMqx
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYYUJ8j1R8z
結果可想而知，我遇到了這種怪事，那台扭蛋機只是晃了一下，我卻整個人飛往後飛了至少三公尺，換來了痛的好像裂掉的屁股和五根腳趾頭。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJyDqmCAxwk
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHuDDDXMDG
「痛痛痛痛……！」我難受的閉著眼抱著腳縮成一團，怒吼：「臭狗！我一定要宰了你！」但四周完全安靜。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfDQIwE3H9Q
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRn7wGY08Z4
我睜開眼，那隻狗娃娃和扭蛋機都不見了！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2WyokB4HNy
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbNK8kHQeu
連一點蛛絲馬跡都沒有。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAQxvWHLAu
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp7aKEuwh9L
「我…這是做夢嗎？」我伸手往口袋摸去，五十元金幣並不在。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLs7mERP10Q
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoJQZv9OfQZ
「他爺爺的…這年頭的周公也缺錢花嗎！！」我怨恨的幾乎要哭出來。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWe7lv1hEfh
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倒楣。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLe3vaWqx4I
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真夠倒楣！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU3OhlDO2us
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我看我真的去死一死好了，這種沒價值的人生…這種日子……40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2DWaTOKdGV
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvohBlO7KZ7
這種日子過得好痛苦……40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwgzTkrzVL
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40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3BTAWdcIM
一陣冰冷的觸感從我的腳踝傳來。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPOMt5dRBWF
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKqDwVbnjmr
這次又是什麼？40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4Kb7Lyx9O
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4IpDfvAyjX
我勉強透過模糊的視線分辨著抓住我的白色的東西，白白的東西從人行道邊邊的排水孔的鐵柵裡伸出來，好像…是一隻人手？40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg8x4QL622c
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRoXKa6QtgX
「咿咿咿咿！放開我啊啊啊－－！」我發出尖叫用力的往後縮，但那隻手卻越抓越緊－－40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKJ2p6SjMp
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjwRN34bmcN
「你是腦袋進水嗎！」一個哀怨的聲音尖叫著從裡面傳來：「過份的人類！人家第一次出『廠』就這麼狼狽，居然是在水溝裡面耶！我都沒尖叫你在尖叫什麼啦！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5FAgJhZOQV
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwHBY22x4V
「可是你已經尖叫了啊！」我腦袋一片空白的喊回去。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRrtSoZkKj
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4N3degSdY
「還不是因為你一直叫！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0gi4PVxcR
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0FCr7DJU5A
「那是因為你抓著我不放我當然會嚇到啊啊－－！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBbFe3ITm9
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcbLxkMYk1d
「我不抓住你你一定會跑掉！」他生氣的道。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmxgYoMZUfz
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlOG6Lkya3S
「我、我我保證我不會跑！」天殺的！這傢伙到底什麼來頭！40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpIUVrYexbu
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5dC4fZLZU
「你發誓？」那個聲音問。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxo9zXEbPXC
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWTcFALVWc
「我發誓，對我的良心。」雖然我自己都不知道我有沒有。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVvyJEcJLl
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFckr7SVl00
「讓我想想，我媽說你們人類都不太能信任。」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyIh5DgIX7j
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEQ7KuB0qJ
「只要你會放開手就都好說。」畢竟也過了一會兒，我也比較鎮靜了些，至少那隻手的主人似乎沒有要傷害我的意思。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm9GDpPZHtA
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWgbKAly0zZ
大概半分鐘，他說：「好啦！我等一下把『門』丟上去，你一定要給我接好。」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBMweplyukK
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ92pR7no01m
「沒問題。」我答。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZ3FBdh2vL
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNtp4Qjl7M
不過顯然他還是不放心，惡狠狠的補道：「要不然我就從你的馬桶鑽出來！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRnJcsWhdA
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQmkV6ogsC
我吞了口口水，看著那隻手鬆開我的腳踝，然後一顆藍白色的扭蛋從鐵柵的隙縫中飛出來。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZ6afZvLB8
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ38eILM4mbL
我急忙撲過去，檢起了那顆扭蛋。幾乎就在撿起來，抬頭的同時，我看見了對面巷子口，一隻…肚子開了一個大洞的白色狗娃娃，正緊張的喊「別跑！快回來啊！」滿地爬的撿回扭蛋，塞進肚子裡的畫面。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCyozfX2kw
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD3QFbd2suw
……原來是這樣子，姑且不論扭蛋機，難怪我剛才找不到它。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfWwlRWJ9FJ
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHLur5MBGx
就在我有點恍然大悟的時候，手上的扭蛋裡傳出了一個悶悶的聲音：「喂！人類，你仔細聽好了，我是來自坑坑魔界的坑坑魔王一族的文蜻，叫我文蜻大人就可以了，今天起我會督促你乖乖填好你那些文坑，給我記清楚了！」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLNwEhPHwu
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFV2obJduYj
「你說啥？」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmvla9PPGv
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHlXdutJaid
我聽得一頭霧水，不過手上捧著的扭蛋突然自己打開了。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyWl6pxMRFh
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYOIry6hGn8
一個個子嬌小黑色長髮，金色眼睛，穿著奇怪長袍，看不出男女的小孩子氣鼓鼓的盤坐在扭蛋裡面瞪著我。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxAzSyTi9U
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXpYlnDXJg
「報上名來！」他高傲的說。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCBfu4VAyt
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYob2o0YVFl
「呃…金稻水。」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxF57ybIqy
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvcHkGsSEDa
「噗！」他笑了起來，我承認我的名字很…好笑。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡssqnr57mho
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG6z5eVr3Ha
「阿金，你只須要明白一件事。」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDCII3OotWa
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAS2ST7gRPX
「什麼事？」我聽天由命。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jxRIGAYcV
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHDuVuiOAmf
「那就是，你沒有好好填坑滿足我，我會讓你活在整天被催文趕稿的修羅場裡。」他笑得很天真，不過有夠邪惡的。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqwp7vgVfk
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEfPvat5OG
所以我花了五十元轉出了一個催文大隊長還是變態惡編輯？40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYj44oScJeF
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DyaPiHES8
「要知道，我能不能順利通過程年禮『羽化』都要看你坑有沒有好好按時填好，內容太差我也不會放水的，一直到幫你登上完稿的巔峰前，我都不會離開你。」他認真的態度，不知道為什麼我竟有點感動。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlZTHrAmOV6
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOtzqFEzZ5
「我會加油的。」我忍不住擦了擦眼角。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvcjtjdVF6i
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIpDk2AdSH
「這種反應才對嘛！不要看到本殿下像看到魔王怪物似的……」他打了個大大的呵欠，說：「我要先休息了，沒想到第一次到人界就要化成人形…你可要好好想想今天填坑的內容啊。」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXm06bJdKtN
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKIZbwTV6HS
說完，他闔上了扭蛋的蓋子。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTIywQVTqrN
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTiY8DnOeS
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoeUOA3UtXY
今天，我在台Ｘ市的巷子裡遇到了推銷扭蛋的狗布偶，花了五十元買了腳痛和擦傷，還有手上的這個自稱是什麼來自坑坑魔界的怪異生物，說要幫助我登上什麼巔峰。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqhwAZPwjQ1
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEwceTjCzaE
但是這種怪事說出去了誰會相信呢？40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSoRY6iEJI4
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrphRySh54
扭蛋傳來輕響：「…不准給我偷懶啊！阿金。」40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSQ7ZT90Zn
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJz7NgRUIf
呵！真是睡意濃厚的聲音。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkOgUlVxKCg
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5AcsN90NnC
說不定，我的五十元金幣真的沒白花。40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDb6xktxt3V
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp3yg3rOT3V
（楔子完）ns216.73.216.238da2
