【一十四】從前至今的情人節41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJcXQwY03QE
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*情人節賀文。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡal32c099d5
＊一段話提到十四彼女。 （但這篇是一十四，講真。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc8V6LCWrOf
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*****41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqLxsLvFmn
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「啊！今天是情人節啊──」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAP0svPGH2
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情人節啊。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWs4pBRO0C8
我的一生至今爲止經歷過二十多個情人節。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOz8LgRndt4
之中有些我還記得，有些我已經忘了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYDnwycAbPU
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第一個仍有印象的情人節是在我十歲的時候。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7RU1xMHvT
那時候情人節在日本還沒被商業文化荼毒完全，巧克力不算泛濫。對情人節的印象頂多是知道這是爲了紀念一個叫Valentine的修士而開始的節日，但它何以會演變爲向喜歡對象告白的特殊日子我至今仍然無從知曉。不過那對當時的我來說一點也不重要。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfTXbjL1xD
對於十歲小男孩而言，擺在客廳裡的電視機比什麽女孩子的喜歡還要有吸引力……這話你相信啊？怎麽可能。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8OD6sPVroS
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那年情人節我們兄弟因爲想要收到魚魚子的告白而在她家門口前集體埋伏，從早上八點到晚上九點，連晚飯也忘記要吃，六個人後來全感冒了，媽媽發了頓好大的脾氣，下場淒慘。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GV5D505Gz
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我十五歲的時候，情人節已變得非常可怕。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFr8Ibl7wCE
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明明距離情人節還有半個月，街上卻已經被節日相關的廣告文宣給佔據。巧克力專賣店裡的女孩子從櫃檯排到了馬路上，甜蜜的情歌在空氣中飄揚，街上到處是粉紅色，好似世界上只剩下粉紅色似的。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFwN3WJY6F
粉紅色的彩帶、粉紅色的氣球、粉紅色的燈泡、粉紅的氣氛以及發出粉紅色閃光的白癡情侶們。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ZJsdfJ7Cg
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太多幸福炫目的粉紅色讓我反胃想吐。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgZMHOnth9E
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聽到這句話時，戴了條粉紅色圍巾的トド松生氣了，十四松卻笑著說：一松一松、那你就喜歡黃色吧。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqmNGcQAHM
說完他塞了顆太妃糖給我。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡazC04gvmeQ
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吃完甜甜的糖果後會覺得很幸福喔。十四松說。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbHUDKjURj
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十七歲那年的情人節，明明也是沒女友的Loser長男一時興起。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA2cJRvfrNn
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「讓沒能收到巧克力的可憐弟弟們嚐嚐溫暖的愛」他這麼說，製造了滿桌子的巧克力。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqNPa5VtAv
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我吃了其中一顆，接著卡在喉嚨中的一大坨芥末就讓我嗆得不行，兩隻眼睛都流出了鼻水。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WfjPTEFX5
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同樣吃下惡作劇巧克力的十四松也沒好到哪去，他一頭倒進我兩腿間的空隙，邊打滾邊噴火，我猜想他吃的巧克力要不是包了一整根辣椒就是包了兩根辣椒，不然火力不會強到差點燒光我的眉毛。話說，他那時穿著的是件怪獸睡衣，搭配上從口裡噴出的火焰，看起來頗有pokemon的感覺……41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡImADRnn051
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像小火龍吧。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIXVn6LvaB
我這麼想著，把手邊要喝的牛奶灌進他嘴裡。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEkr0An4eG
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「噗哈！」十四松的嘴邊多了一圈白白的鬍子，「十四松松松松松復活！謝謝援救，一松哥哥！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzUzyjgzV8f
「沒什麼。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuBqUZJqdY
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總歸來說那年情人節過得非常溫馨。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLC8WFpgQNo
中了特別大獎‧綜合口味的三男最後把剩餘的巧克力全塞回元兇的肚中，おそ松哥哥在廁所拉了一個多鐘頭的屎，我們則吃光戲劇社社員們送給屎松的義理巧克力，不錯吧？41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFf2SuV3UU
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二十多歲的某一年情人節，我忘記是前年還是大前年還是大大前年了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5CBrfIFTFx
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那天的十四松不知道發了什麽神經，一大早……才早上五點多就把我叫了起來。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eywKACuRl
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這比平常打棒球的時間還要早，我原本懶得理他，想裝作爬不起床，誰知道那個混蛋居然死不罷休，直接撲坐到我身上，儘管再怎麽困我也只好睜開眼睛。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQAnUYUDXp
一看就發現十四松怪怪的。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEt5o2z3uk
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「……怎麽了？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDACTWQv2W
他睜著兩隻大大的眼睛，嘴巴也咧咧張著，和平常一樣，但我就是覺得不太對勁。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzFY5hJpNs
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「海！一松哥哥！我們去看海吧！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZMbC5qK5b2
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都是因爲這句話的關係，我們居然真的去了海邊。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcAH0OLimo
沒帶球棒、球、手機、錢包，什麽東西都沒有，兩個人兩手空空地跑到冬天氣溫只有個位數的大海旁邊，像瘋子一樣。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAlHFo87EQ
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十四松一下計程車就拉住我的大衣袖子一路前行，他走得很快，還越來越快。我必須跨大我的步伐、甚至得小跑步才能趕上他在前頭的拉扯，十四松一直走一直走，直到那片廣漠無邊的灰藍色水體映入視野時我們才停下。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAcifud5tl
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冬天的海和夏天的海不同，遠遠眺望海的時候我第一次發現這件事。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr4msQEmPIV
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冬天裡的海是陰冷的，連混有鹽味的空氣也感覺比往常更濕更重，海平面也是壓抑的形狀，只有在沙岸與水的交界邊線才能發現破碎的小小潮花。我們那天碰上的是安靜的海。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySgQC5iwmR
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我一面草率挑了個表面平滑的消波塊一屁股坐下，一面在這種連寄居蟹也會想躲起來的狗屎天氣中嘆出口中的熱氣，熱氣在寒冷的溫度裡瞬間化作一團白霧，白霧中有十四松眺望海的背影。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBICzLclJIn
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就是因爲總是拿他沒辦法才會陪他幹了一堆傻事。到現在我還不明白十四松到底哪來的看海興致。但我冷得要死，看到十四松短褲下那光著的兩條腿感覺又更冷了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzlQbsvEjLm
興起過好幾次二話不說把十四松抓回家的念頭，可是每次看到他直挺挺佇立著的背影，這念頭又會消失得無影無踪。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvTTIm065Qy
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在看什麽？41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDaCTlOFUHb
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海面之上是陰霾的天空，海面之下是黑漆的水，毫無船隻或海鳥，大浪也是沒有的。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTorUci0qOm
不知道哪處的風卻吹進了某個海蝕洞窟，空氣擠壓後發出銳利拔高的聲音聽起來就像人類的哀泣，像是有誰在哭。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgy0gchc6yU
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這時原本如雕像般完全定住的十四松像是忽然解除禁錮似地，全身劇烈地動了一下。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPuWWSPS1U
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下一秒，他開始往海的方向狂沖。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTMIjzHqeB
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沒有預警地、頭也不回地沖，簡直是要跑進海底裡自殺的氣勢。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSUqUAADh4P
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我嚇得站起身，鶏皮疙瘩也和寒毛一幷竪起，在全身飈出冷汗的同時我拔腿追向十四松。我和他的距離太遠，我跑的速度又無法像他那麽快，我根本追不上他。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGnUOZEQwq5
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十四松距離海水越來越近，他的背影越來越小，在偌大的海的面前，訝異於那個向來精力充沛的十四松居然變得如此渺小，我多麽害怕他會就這樣真的從我眼前消失。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ7IVYGfo0g
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但在距離海只剩一公尺不到的地方，十四松停下了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdTrsuhjeN
他急急煞住腳步，大叫一聲「喝呀！」，把手裡不知道是小石子還是貝殼的東西往空中一拋。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWm1UjUAXpb
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那東西飛得又快又遠，一下子就變成看不清楚的小黑點，在空中畫出一道弧線後，噗通一聲砸入水面。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8fGMrpbLPQ
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楞楞地看著弟弟伴隨呼吸劇烈起伏的肩膀，我忽然之間明白了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlr3rCKirm4
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這裡就是十四松遇到了那個女孩子的海。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvi5QoOOLO9
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她和十四松之間的故事我記得一清二楚。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqwaYTPHRw
在那一場大雨後，弟弟坐在豆丁太的關東煮攤上大哭出聲，他傷心極了，我從沒見過那麽傷心的十四松。他哭著說起那女孩曾經試圖自盡的事情、說起他來到海邊練習揮棒的事情、說起他被大浪捲走差點死了卻被女孩救起的事情。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXFZ9tkMFD
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那些他喜歡上她、她也喜歡上他的事情。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡce8W8a4GTB
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「謝謝超大再見全壘打！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSrJxQa6rxG
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十四松用盡全身力氣地吼著。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7q92LUYZof
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伴隨他的大吼，好多好多個十四松在我的腦海裡浮出。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0YFV8xUzwS
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在魚魚子家前瑟瑟發抖的十四松、挨媽媽駡後裹在棉被裡偷偷掉眼淚的十四松、把喜歡的糖果塞到我手中的十四松、祝我幸福的十四松、吃到藏禍巧克力被辣得噴火的十四松、倒在我身上的十四松、有著一圈牛奶鬍子的十四松、早上五點吵著說要去看海的十四松、拉住我袖子的十四松、小跑步的十四松、拋石子的十四松……他們一個接一個的閃現，在我的眼底裡，與前方的那抹黃色背影慢慢地重疊了起來。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7F6yj0S3io
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十歲、十五歲、十七歲、二十多歲的、笑著哭著發呆著吵鬧著的，我的弟弟，十四松。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0XPWPsVHrh
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「一松哥哥，海好漂亮啊。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEEsFhGY34
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「是嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvKzf152uj
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「嗯，超──級漂亮！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9aejTs8JPg
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黃色的背影轉過身，臉上又變回平常那個張得大大的笑容。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2LH7gweKJ3
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「哥哥不這麽覺得嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFmEc36EXe
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「我……」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnH5TRkElGo
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遠方層層重疊的烏雲不知何時冒出些縫隙，此時正漏出了稀疏的陽光，我望著海面上像呼吸一樣有著起起落落的波浪，波浪上頭都鍍了點小小的光芒。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ATKCmpJwc
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我猜十四松的石頭此時已經沉到無法透光的海底了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2X3E5Fvxq
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全身的肌肉都在哀叫酸痛，氣衰力盡，前發也因爲奔跑時冒出的汗而濕透。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3qEzfMplW6
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我做不到像十四松那樣可以把東西遠遠丟出，笑不出來也說不出道別的話。所以我把手中的石頭藏進衣服口袋的最最深處，想要它永遠安靜地沉甸甸地在角落待著。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtgpU3UdrTy
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「……我快冷死了。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9Eu1S79pO
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「哎？會冷嗎？啊，確實耶我的腳也怪怪的，變得好僵硬！嗚噢！跟棒冰一樣！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNAn0HnrNos
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「誰讓你穿短褲來啊，白痴。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtiaxFBHxY
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「嘿嘿，被一松哥哥駡白痴啦！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡljFF4Vd9qc
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「走了，回家。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSG0Jm8HMSs
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「回家、回家！啊，要吃肉包嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKDvLmCxa54
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「沒帶錢包啊。你有嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34nSoDdRYV
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十四松將手伸進他的衛衣口袋裡左掏掏右翻翻，最後抓出了好幾個百元銅板：「哈哈！Nice catch！6 4 3 get you！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8Gzx4iwJF
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「厲害，你那是異次元口袋啊──十四松先生。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGPp7mvk9LO
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「異次元口袋？哆啦a夢？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDlUdD4dxrk
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「哦，是來自昭和的機器貓呢。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdt5ISkds1V
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「機器貓！原來我是機器貓啊！我都不知道我是貓！不愧是一松哥哥！好厲害！」十四松說：「啊！如果我是貓的話，一松哥哥會給我點心囉？會陪我玩嗎？會讓我窩在你身邊嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV8mzjgDoac
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「不是從以前就是這麽做了嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVGi3YbY6L
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「說的也是！」他點點頭，「那、那，很喜歡很喜歡我？你會很喜歡很喜歡我嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9skDy5TsUC
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「我一直很喜歡很喜歡你啊。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ63y40TMBRM
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「哇！好棒！超──級高興！我也很喜歡很喜歡一松哥哥！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsKHANwFesi
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「……是喔。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOaAIlUksk
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「嗯嗯嗯！高興嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxYHhuSIZG
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「高興啊。」我說，模仿他的語調：「超──級高興。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo2zEFnOesR
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那天我們距離海邊最近的Family mart買了兩個肉包。張口咬下肉包時我被裡頭的肉汁給燙了舌頭，被攪鹹苦交雜的濱海空氣凍紅的鼻子也被熱煙熏暖了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyphQeZvitv
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雖然還是有潮濕的寒意從外套縫隙鑽進，往身體的每一寸內裡滲透，但是與十四松隔著羽絨大衣相挨著的肩膀卻出奇的溫暖。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Cn66MIpqZ
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「哎？一松哥哥在哭？這個肉包有那麽難吃嗎？」十四松一面驚慌一面用他的黃色袖子給我擦著眼淚。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgWL8X08Qp5
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「怎麽可能在哭。是肉汁噴進了眼睛。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrrOcqQzkS
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吃著肉包的那個情人節，我第一次發現了自己喜歡上十四松的事實，苦澀又幸福地迎接了20多年人生中遲來的初戀及失戀。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY7iQlfuwbH
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然後今年。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1FjCpE9F9
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「啊！今天是情人節啊──」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KXCxOTKmu
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就算我們不情願那個坐落在二月十四號的日子也依舊是到來了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHyNNbmGae
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おそ松哥哥這麼說著：「要幹點什麼事好呢？打牌？賭馬？小鋼珠？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6hsZbGpWx7
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「那不是跟每天一樣嗎？做點正經事啊。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡliNusEY1MN
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「好囉嗦啊老媽松，你今天怎麼不跟招聘雜誌甜甜蜜蜜了？唔哇，等等！トド松居然也和手機螢幕分手了，怎麼回事？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwItXy2SYKh
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「呀──因為這種鬼日子裡面，女孩子們都忙得談戀愛，沒空閒理我呢。」トド松Totti臉。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqP7NAibr6
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「寂靜的生命，喧囂的心靈。哼，無名的英雄就算是孤獨也……」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gTySrUJAW
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「不要再說話啦，很痛耶臭松哥哥！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYfPpwWPMSV
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「哎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZJZSfP2Sz
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「這種時候求人雜誌裡的臨時工作八成全是造福情侶的活動吧……覺得有點、尷尬，總之不太情願就不看了。」チョロ松哥哥搔著臉頰說。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNjgtEzw2HK
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トド松：「啊──我懂我懂！像是發放巧克力蛋糕♥什麼的、在播放愛情片的電影院裡出售情侶連號座位♥什麼的、在餐廳當推薦情人節雙人套餐優惠八折♥的服務生什麼的──咿呀！好討厭！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCVCmfbJEk
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「唔哇──不如說超噁心！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVXbBwgRLu2
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我：「噁心、噁心……」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAzJzCn1qVD
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趴在抗力上的十四松猛地抬起頭，大笑：「噁心！噁心麻糬！！！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtH5oRXeVoG
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「噁心麻糬是什麼啊十四松哥哥……」トド松笑問：「你想吃點心了嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5mYCVUJGLR
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「Sweeeeeets！我喜歡點心！家裡有點心嗎？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoeUcRxa6G
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「家裡有沒有我不知道。」おそ松哥哥：「但如果是巧克力的話去找路上情侶就有囉☆」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuCyjQEyAdU
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「你那是犯罪宣言吧おそ松哥哥！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVBWnuM0vi
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「來吧，カラ松girls，don’t be shy，送上愛的果實，讓妳們甜蜜的心與我合為一體吧，BANG！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmkTDDYdWuk
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我：「去死。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdIVeRwCUZV
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「不如就讓大哥我來做巧克力給大家吃吧？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfr6XpyCfZF
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「你認為我們有可能讓前科犯二度犯罪嗎你這人渣長男！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNIN9XJAlk4
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「兩個人都冷靜點別吵了嘛！真是的──都怪你們提到一直提巧克力，害我嘴饞了。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpZBwc3Tpc
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「你說什麼呢トド松！我們身為精緻新品（備註：童貞）再怎麼樣也要有自尊啊！」おそ松哥哥霍地站起身：「在這種日子！吃巧克力！我絕對不允許！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEI0Koj1L0G
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「噯──不可以嗎？可是剛剛一松哥哥才吃了我送的本命巧克力耶？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tte2jGvpY
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「對嘛！既然一松哥哥都吃了十四松哥哥送的本命巧克力那我也可以吃吧？何況是誰剛才還說要做巧克力的啊！おそ松哥哥你這不是自打臉嗎……為什麼你們的表情那麼詭異？幹麻？我剛剛有說什麼奇怪的話嗎？……咦、等等……」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgifmo3mvjU
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……41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡETwbEgUjLC
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「咦？！」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRhM7SFF1KB
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「十四松（哥哥）送給一松（哥哥）的本命巧克力？？？？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ24clkp16iC
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「呵呵。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmksTIjEyp
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被四道驚訝的視線集火的感覺是如此愉悅。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc0r8f7XnLa
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松野一松，2●歲，職業：尼特，在今年的情人節是屬於人生勝利組的一方。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ZaAzEZMAi
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-fin.41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Vu3nehCQJ
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提前一天發文！結尾和內文有溫差真是不好意思！希望大家不會因此感冒了（？）41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKyFUTwtCX
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中間那段是我想寫很久了的一松單戀十四松的劇情！喜歡安靜地喜歡十四松又不敢明說的一松！這篇的一松對那個女孩子的感覺是有點羨慕又有點同情，覺得可以理解她的心情。
＂你怎麽和我一樣喜歡上了一個奇怪的傢伙啊／你也懂得十四松是個應當被喜歡的傢伙啊＂
微妙又各種矛盾同時幷存的複雜心態。
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