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再醒來的時候。我坐在醫院冰涼的走廊長椅上。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcnPM0y95I1
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「獄寺？你醒了？」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06t8cdtPcw
正依靠的肩膀瘦弱卻堅定，安心的氣息。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXZo4Np1V1
我抬頭撞上十代首領滿是擔憂與憐憫的目光，他的臉蒼白至無血色。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbMc5EXBfgZ
「醒來就好醒來就好，哪裡還痛麼？」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnCcrT2UvFq
我機械的搖頭，喉嚨幹到吐不出完整句子。如往常時，我也許會馬上從他懷裏脫逃出來，用敬語不停對剛才自己的無理舉動道歉。然而現在，我想任性一下。因為我太過於需要，這個容我卸下防備，縱我袒露軟弱的避風港。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5WO4wpmnRZ
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvOR2TtNDKM
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyzH9cJA5BZ
「下次不要再這麽莽撞了，知道嗎！」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8QbpDag6f
他手掌輕緩的，若有若無撫著我的背脊，上面附有母親的溫度。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUDVbP2zJ9
走道裏三兩個人焦慮的走過，急診室的氣氛不如想像中那麽窒息，令人惶恐的死寂，偶爾傳來的幾聲哀號。黑夜有些冰冷，我們依賴在一起像是互相取暖。縱然我清楚自己幷不瞭解，也無從瞭解到十代目的私人生活。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0qMe2WnqaK
他是否有在戀愛？或許也會因爲思念而焦慮，甚至是被傷害後的迷茫？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTKWN21xmJF
總能看透我的十代首領，無需我多言，也知道我在被什麽羈絆著動彈不得的十代首領…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJ7ZlKQWhi
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4i1XiJunD0
「十代目……」 委屈，痛苦，這一刻被無形引力吸出開始瓦解我佯裝的堅强…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2jjy487gJ
額頭粗略纏著惱人情緒的紗布，手臂的傷口還在隱隱作痛。我真窩囊，明明是要挑釁，卻被對方教訓得要首領幫我善後。現在還要一副孬種樣依賴在需要我保護的人懷中，思考那些有的沒的兒女情長。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgfByXxKGEQ
泄露單相思沒有收穫，但却很輕鬆。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDI16cBvKE
罪惡感令山本會對我格外溫柔。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SbKeY0WH2
而且一定不會再發生比這更糟糕的事情，不會再受更深的傷害。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZSRcsRAA97
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但是……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveBP43bgDX
嚼不爛的痛苦，理不清的哀傷。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIFsWp0050i
如果可以將它們藏在某處不被發現……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD104WrNr2j
鼻子好酸，眼睛發脹，下一秒我再無法控制自己。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5ALaxO1bp
「好啦，要是想哭的話……」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRLq1f0tQm
「獄寺…我都明白的，明白。」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYOQ6KMAs42
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3Fw8YRRNR
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再無法控制的…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfv6u5XN3Yt
「…十…十代…唔……」 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXU8zjOQ6Rm
淚如雨下。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfb162yG23
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請原諒我…不會太久…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlAUQVaTjRd
就這一小會兒…馬上就會好了……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7wzzEpkER
等這些懦弱的液體流到幹了，就可以再拿起武器…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzA0JmNdmJE
再不會讓你操心…沒什麽再可以再阻攔我……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95BLL5zCvG
倒帶回曾經單一却安全的生活…不受束縛。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiW7NX8MQHZ
眼裏只會追隨你一人，其餘不想過問…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoANiyOxkpb
即使是他……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUhNDGMNJ4G
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山本……你現在正在做什麽？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVsJB4p55c6
是不是正在心疼，被我狠心毆打挂彩的雲雀？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGIxamG5VGP
正在爲他細心包扎傷口，用一貫的寵溺與深情語氣。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7weIlu9mJ
那麼那個人映在山本瞳孔中的身影會是怎樣的？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksjkGE4Ayf
是不是也在像我一般懷揣著一灌稠濃的漿液，49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF4Q69lGU0D
滿打滿撞撒在各處角落一灘灘，或粘膩得緊貼在身上甩不凈？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo32ZQqbDkK
也會想要觸碰他寬廣的肩，還有他燦爛的臉麼。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXty3ELcU7B
那時，山本的心中會發出怎樣的聲響？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡinLDNneNSX
那個応接室裏充斥著怎樣的回憶？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOhI6u7gC4I
一直，一直……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXzb63c61ke
都只有兩個人的吧。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJpFRmpV8bI
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專門找藉口，多次經過可以裝作偶然相遇他的地方。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4twF1rdAGp
哪怕只能見一面，聽一次聲音也可以。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhMNe1lFKn
拼命地思念，使勁掙扎著。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjW63gf5YEr
但是我只明白這點，光是思念就令人快要心痛死。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo1F0Ca9Mbb
而無法離開你的理由，只要這心痛就够了。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsLxiLDuyEW
不過，放心吧，這算得了什麽大事。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUcr0GcAou5
哪怕會親眼見到這些，我也不會像易碎品斷裂，能夠繼續活下去。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeGC004SFRm
哪怕山本一直惦記著那個人，哪怕再看他同樣充滿不安的神情…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYOlqO52MMX
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMofBQk4Qgq
我的心也不會輕易崩潰。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2wexhSGDx
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等傷好到連疤都看不到我才肯回學校上課，山本主動跑過來遞給我筆記。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1j4llcXAX
我才不相信，他上課能記到重點在紙上，只是翻開了看，了了草草的他的字迹，我讀得到滿滿的認真，還參雜著不應有的，心軟與愧疚。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaugZHlmncJ
一抬頭，發現班裏大部分同學均向我這邊投來複雜目光。有些女生不顧山本此行目的，做作得走過來搭訕，一舉一動連我鶏皮疙瘩掉了一地。 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsX6l0kCEL2
「山本同學，你和獄寺同學認識？」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGzBCMsFnyf
「獄寺同學爲什麽從來不說你們是國中同學？！」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRJB8drNpF
「山本同學，這是我自己做的點心，不介意的話就收下吧！」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFeDYlE2lI4
「山本同學的棒球聽說很厲害，有打算加入棒球社團麽？」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtdLCJihR6h
「山本同學……」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuti59w7et
够了都給我滾！49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqpL27iuf9
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ19PSc8yuN9
人群聚集一堆嘰嘰喳喳，我完全沒了吃午餐的習慣，逃似的飛奔出教室。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuPq6nrnyfx
任憑山本在後面怎樣喊我的名也顧不上絲毫的猶豫。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI2FyPsYpdN
我真想馬上找個地洞鉆進去，永遠都不要出來。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbdhCh8cYGk
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Is4mTCbMw
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「獄寺！等等我！」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk44QxSDgMX
我已經記不住自己跑了多久，他竟然一直在後面窮追不捨。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡucIBW3m75v
沒辦法，根本沒有吃早餐的我肯定敵不過他運動神經發達，只好停下脚步找個地方猛喘大氣。他追上來，扶住靠著墻逐漸下滑的我死不放手，雖然我用眼神威脅他無數次。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzm0wsCMcHC
「你很煩……」 我和他上一次對話，好似已經是很久前了。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrjKEhU2xKh
他完全忽視了我一切反面的情緒。「一起去福利社買午飯吧！獄寺！」 沒等我反應，乾淨得笑著拽住我走。 醞釀好的拒絕也被他濕熱的掌溫融化。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg8LbFrR4uj
我要被你這樣牽著鼻子走到何時？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGdWZujpoHN
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHnXXXRXuZ
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡudUdyGG2jO
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他肯定是看過雲雀才來這兒，我知道自己把雲雀傷的不輕。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41KVSKRsgk
若山本老媽子似的囑咐我幾句，我全當聽狗吠。然而他未多表現出一分异樣，只是將買好的套餐端到我面前，討好似的笑容。 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPPcApYk1P
「還頭暈嗎？」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPggfuHQd2G
我沒應他，只是側頭。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0aowhJ46x
我也不知自己鬧什麽彆扭，但就是看不慣，這樣曖昧場景。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGdW5n4R2WD
對我狠點更好，我更容易恨你，然後我們就玩完。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8rxrhJIMar
「獄寺？」 煩不煩啊你。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP30t87zOon
不要總是用這種語氣叫我的名字。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tG6ua09OB
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4urwTJnoY
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「獄寺怎麽不吃？是不喜歡人多麼…沒辦法，中午食堂就是這樣。」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnd5d9yQxN
「不過爲了吃美食，總是要犧牲點呢。」 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhrva5eefu
他把自己碗裏的蝦肉球都夾給我， 「獄寺喜歡吃這個吧？吶，都給你。」　49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEXFRUF9lGf
再沒力氣和他作對。我閉上眼睛，緩緩別過頭。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLwPt79KxZM
心裏絲絲縷縷的酸澀……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYIOpyxGVe
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfM2dwepxG
山本……你可不可以試著，這樣講給我聽？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8r9jMbRZbd
『都給你。你想要的，想從我這裡拿走的都可以給你。』49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyFS5CMeBVU
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FJVTJmqP8
儘管我知道一切根本不可能如此發生。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXAYudpJvgw
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GI2RBMZPT
「我不餓，你吃你的，不用管我。」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfPubGmq8f
既然無法回應我，那就不要再給我希望。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG50lcA4E56
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5lfHUrCAA
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我乾脆放下筷子，將視線挪至走動的人群。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQUq1zFJenn
能感覺到氣氛由盛至衰逐漸尷尬起來，他也只好低頭默默扒飯。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbV7FgxRWWM
幾個風紀委員估計是記住了我的長相，路過我身邊的時候能感覺到敵意。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpT1s7WguK
「說起來。雲雀沒怎麼樣吧。」 我沒頭沒腦竟然要問這個？！49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcfiEOThfqP
他啞然。過了好一會兒才講， 「沒事了，傷……恢復得差不多了。」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnjl3MY3Sc
有那麽嬌氣？！我記得自己下手很輕的，因為心有它顧。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuHcUixNO0n
看著山本一臉五官凝聚的苦惱狀，忍不住一笑。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ48CSYuTNmy
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6wnVpw4KW
這個白癡，因為戀愛的事情開始會察言觀色了嗎？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QA1Lt45VZ
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqvsa3TDilO
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwOAOOl0YK
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緊接著是更深的沉默。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnuEnadQrS
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDUNFuWru2
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmqn27MUQYX
「我肋骨都好了呢！」 他突然轉移話題， 「你看，我又活動自如了！」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjaOICB9BjL
「不要得意忘形啦混蛋快坐好。」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1S44KaHJR
「那次被雲雀修理的夠嗆啊！不過都是因為我吸煙的錯啦…」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJ1Jm0DeOH
吸煙？你已經開始吸烟了麼…49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLmRHQNV0Hr
靠！是誰天天雞婆似叫我戒煙的！49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdQQgHCJ1tV
爲什麽你也吸煙了……你在煩惱些什麽？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3EWLon3sTt
同時煙民，或許那幷不是因爲煙的味道有多麼誘惑。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4vFiFEbSq
只是人會空虛，需要一種習慣性動作填補這空白。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbkKIhyOR1
你這麼做，是因為空虛還是什麽？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY274MsLH5d
你已經堅定決心，不再做棒球手了？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAwbA2LakKt
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……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLvXO9HZKvV
看他手舞足蹈滑稽的樣子想要逗我笑。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsujJsco0Ju
更是心酸似吃了一顆梅。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgMSPxv0Hk
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc6bU7ypwl0
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUlIrPRiir
我正思索著，突然迎面他的手撲上來。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeL5OLBnNtK
「獄寺，你傷好重。」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGtOR0z2i7Q
我嚇得本想往後一撤，身體卻僵硬在原地。任憑他揉我沒搭理的亂髮。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HDYanyVwj
「雲雀手勁兒大，你小心被他傷到要害。」 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5qUmrkcvE
你這是放馬後炮吧，而且真正傷到要害的不是你麼？49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuW2U5xMaiq
「……你…背還疼麼？」 我故作冷漠的語調。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsUqoRanG87
「獄寺終于肯說話啦，來吃飯吧！」 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9mETARHKUC
他又將筷子遞到我面前。「我沒事噢！這幾天休息好著呢，大補了幾頓。現在十萬火急的想要運動啊唉！」 說著還不忘展示他肱二頭肌。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIMe3dAbPVf
「那就不要再在風紀混了，打棒球去。」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnCXMvrTcY8
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzGCiBZoGm
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGieEqSmEDb
……49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82wIyVoc2H
我不自主講出這句，事後才意識到不自然。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkIRUUuwZte
山本瞳孔一縮，結結巴巴支吾了一下， 「之前我問獄寺…」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJZDpJ8Ql2
「你根本早就自己决定好了吧！」 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWGYMVbTXc
一股怒氣竄上心頭，我拍案而起。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU4TlieNtdG
我那些都是謊話！你根本就是爲了找個契機給自己一個正當理由而已！49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1dOqTF3JP
「根本就是你自己！抽煙喝酒！參加幫派！裝什麽受傷！」49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2AeHnGbGQ
「獄、獄寺？……冷靜啊……」 49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPx6Dsl1lI5
他慌張的拉我，顯露出為難的樣子。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbxSpnu5Sg9
周圍的人紛紛瞧向我們這邊，醜惡的嘴臉在看熱鬧。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6SJTn243U
包括掩藏在人群中的黑衣男人。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4RQCSWP2Tn
雲雀恭彌，你他媽個混蛋。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEWhIsh3voS
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86WemFRB17
打與不打，對我意義不大。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtOCPUAWCj6
然而看不到你與棒球的結伴，我的心變得空蕩。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5gbN6SW2z
縱使被他人鄙視，那些東西卻是我的寶貝。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFL6Bd8twC2
山本武，你又一次成功逼迫我煩躁起來。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIWqAvfehcX
頭皮撓出血肉，骨胳也吱吱喳喳跟著開始叫囂起來。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbO2UxgT7R
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49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ymiSU3J2u
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他體味到我怒氣，沒再講話。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMF2Jgaqvep
四目相對的時候，我好想擁緊他。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKziUpkugkd
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVAEfyeVed
他像是雨，倘若可以感受到這濕潤，自己也會像是草木在放晴後的生長，一夜間長大麼？不過也許他會忘記了吧，那時候的風那時候的雲，那時候的光影嘈雜。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU4vupfgw3Z
儘管那麼認真的生氣過迷茫過、隱忍過受傷過，隨著時間流逝笑著回想起來，也許在這個過程中連記憶也會漸漸消失吧。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIKuW7l1YDn
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bSuFJEofH
但是那時候，我的確是在那裡存在過的。49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn5mG1FZUBy
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYIJofk5FE9
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEkG71aAp80
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkstOM8gNJz
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡanxvfj6uZl
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGItihDHHLb
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZOKn1bC4z
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1bPYDJOOr
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49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsWjZVLutzD
49Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡinP2cwEWoB
（未完待續）