他的語調很淡,好像在講述一件再平常不過的事情,可是……全然不是這樣的。7Please respect copyright.PENANAjGhwZI0sUp
7Please respect copyright.PENANAPFk1QKGUlV
「你,不應該放棄,而我,也不應該影響你……去捨棄正常一生。」最後他這樣說,然後就沉默了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAFeevLEwtjV
7Please respect copyright.PENANARzQ3BI6LYW
「……」7Please respect copyright.PENANAMFbOdGOljP
7Please respect copyright.PENANAhv5YnD7grH
……7Please respect copyright.PENANAmoZ9Y9INYm
7Please respect copyright.PENANAkk0iWKu3Em
愣愣的看著學長,我覺得……有點困惑。7Please respect copyright.PENANA467M15sfRv
7Please respect copyright.PENANATZBjbXTxhx
其實他剛剛說的話,並不是像什麼驚雷一樣突然打醒一個人神智還是怎麼的,應該是說,那些我也想過了,不過是彼此角度與立場有點不同。7Please respect copyright.PENANA2eO8lOQlWM
7Please respect copyright.PENANA92VD1DPkrb
突然發現──7Please respect copyright.PENANAGkDvNFRavV
7Please respect copyright.PENANAIjzwmZ6gCX
做這些事我是為了……學長,只有極小的部分是為了自己,那時候放不下的感覺是第一次在我的思維裡出現。7Please respect copyright.PENANAGsfIlfXa9z
7Please respect copyright.PENANAPoM0FtB5nd
隨著成長,我漸漸開始更接近生老病死的周遭,幾次出任務,看見那些喪失親人、愛人的痛苦臉孔漸漸烙印在心底,那時候我就開始想,有一天……7Please respect copyright.PENANA3aPcBP4d6v
7Please respect copyright.PENANAieorhdry2s
有一天這樣事我也會面對,面對親人與有人的離開──我知道我會難過。7Please respect copyright.PENANAeHeRgnwsqy
7Please respect copyright.PENANAMrIluSkhor
而最初時候,也沒也想過什麼假如自己離開了的這種事,直到遇到那位留不住他人的女子後,才不得不意識到一直被努力忽略的,我是妖師,壽命跟人類一樣,但是學長是精靈與獸王族的混血──賽塔已經活了超過兩千年的時光,外表依然年輕,曾未衰老的一切是還能再活得很久、很久的滄桑。7Please respect copyright.PENANASGtU8v9KuQ
7Please respect copyright.PENANAEnUgWWQ4YK
那學長會活多久?7Please respect copyright.PENANAevBhuMX56y
7Please respect copyright.PENANAC4zlJJd0p3
那個曾經的劫難我們已經一起度過,預言師再也沒有為他預言任何災害,所以可以肯定,學長將會活得比想像中的還要久。7Please respect copyright.PENANANCZhxxTB3k
7Please respect copyright.PENANAXRX2UBiodr
我不知道精靈與獸王族血緣在交會之後誕生的生命到底能夠存在於這世上多久,從一些對話推斷至少也是幾千年吧?但我真的不知道。7Please respect copyright.PENANAL1BApE2aJY
7Please respect copyright.PENANAPKb427ZDvw
而不想知道的是,我僅有百年左右的日子,到底……在學長的一生中能算得上什麼?7Please respect copyright.PENANA2m23OInDNJ
7Please respect copyright.PENANArJktY3SZRq
如果他是一個不那麼專情的人、如果他可以遺忘,或許事情就不值得擔心,但是他不是。7Please respect copyright.PENANAgOrHsYR2Dq
7Please respect copyright.PENANApK8lJB613Z
雖然到接受黑山君契約之前我還一直在想,也許我不需要這麼做,甚至害怕著有一天,當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。7Please respect copyright.PENANA1xGSg5XXyl
7Please respect copyright.PENANAprsOuGGQX1
到現在還是不知道學長會什麼會喜歡我,就跟我也不曉得怎麼喜歡上他的一樣,不過他,如此強大、卻總是為我著想……有太多理由我可能會被他吸引,那種心跳的感覺、血液流過的脈動總為他牽引……就是不知道他到底能看上我哪點,還居然在認識不到一年的時間中,就可以為我付出生命。7Please respect copyright.PENANAMvyBbIaUKx
7Please respect copyright.PENANALdpDOXcnP0
所以我害怕又不知道是否該害怕──當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。7Please respect copyright.PENANAM5npeMBnQc
7Please respect copyright.PENANAlPVG6GIS6O
因為我想不透我有什麼地方直得他付出永遠。7Please respect copyright.PENANABmi1gK4RBk
7Please respect copyright.PENANAO63pDCRlDw
只是不願意有任何可能性看見他在漫長的年歲中寂寞,就算是我欠他的,這樣一點回報,我還付得起。7Please respect copyright.PENANAoCkU7n7LX1
7Please respect copyright.PENANA6j8CMcNITW
不過以這些來說,一切都是想多了,很多事情不需要理由,連此刻也是,看他的眼神,我知道我這次選擇沒有錯誤。7Please respect copyright.PENANAFy17bQT67o
7Please respect copyright.PENANARZVLUDN5Cw
……7Please respect copyright.PENANAjVDNmZMsWj
7Please respect copyright.PENANAnX8iswi6og
唯一從沒有想過的是學長的想法。7Please respect copyright.PENANA6PpR9iGMfT
7Please respect copyright.PENANA4N6RU2LsXm
如果我能改變自己的命運,如果我能找到方法留下來,學長怎麼可能不知道、辦不到。7Please respect copyright.PENANAOACNEtQghm
7Please respect copyright.PENANAfSvLqUr8ms
根本就是他不想。7Please respect copyright.PENANAfkwKkTptcs
7Please respect copyright.PENANAIc66Sby511
說不想好像也不太對,應該是說,他放棄了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAmgIccXSWfd
7Please respect copyright.PENANA5dAjEcP7xR
我從沒想過學長也會擔心這些,在他說出來那不長的卻難得的一段話中,我可以捕捉到這些念頭,他早想過了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAR7Nty6kwOp
7Please respect copyright.PENANAvF7tnRBseG
但是比起我害怕看見親人離去,他寧願選擇放手。7Please respect copyright.PENANAX1ClOD5qQ4
7Please respect copyright.PENANAIUVlomXIdx
但是比起我擔心他將不在乎我,他只是想著怎樣對我才是最好。7Please respect copyright.PENANAbjk4AJc02M
7Please respect copyright.PENANATNt1zrA2Im
到頭來,他還是處處為我著想,我不會去說什麼我直不直得他付出這種話,可是……這樣真的好嗎?7Please respect copyright.PENANAeJAiBRGNwZ
7Please respect copyright.PENANA4WLlVJiicX
是不是應該也有什麼事是指有我才能為學長做的,而不是一味讓我接受他的幫助、他的掛心、他……隱晦的愛情?7Please respect copyright.PENANAeC2h4zqJms
7Please respect copyright.PENANA5VZEiFqv8n
真的會有嗎?7Please respect copyright.PENANAEsnPGIS0vC
7Please respect copyright.PENANAk4JBuziFjl
「學長……」慢慢的,我小心翼翼的把手搭上學長肩膀,勾著那銀亮髮絲與中間垂下的一縷血色。7Please respect copyright.PENANARlMIMvoV8D
7Please respect copyright.PENANADJF9tbc8NG
「嗯?」他的眼神,大概是不太明白我會想說什麼的樣子。7Please respect copyright.PENANAw17bISMuh4
7Please respect copyright.PENANAf5rQyj5wXI
這時我知道,有的,一定有什麼是我能為他做的。7Please respect copyright.PENANAOyILgLhpCb
7Please respect copyright.PENANAteB0JzGGLH
不再需要質疑──他真的需要我,而我也需要他……7Please respect copyright.PENANAO3x7rloX6f
7Please respect copyright.PENANAg4bqIMeSO8
「那個啊……」忍不住又騰出一隻手刮了一下臉,「既然你這麼想,也這麼決定了,那……為什麼還去找那個盒精?聽說那東西,並不好拿。」7Please respect copyright.PENANABDrmwoPsYN
7Please respect copyright.PENANAecOlqzKheQ
事實上根本並不是不好拿,而是幾乎不可能拿得到,也不會是一念之間,想去拿就可以順利拿到的東西。7Please respect copyright.PENANAKX6qIDTVAJ
7Please respect copyright.PENANA69fFOCd8tm
白川主我原本裝黑石的抽屜裡,特別留下了關於缺憾盒精的一些事。7Please respect copyright.PENANAXkV9jr4Cjv
7Please respect copyright.PENANA35X5eYxZOF
「……」聽到這問話,學長有一瞬間得錯愕也有一瞬間的明瞭。7Please respect copyright.PENANAH1cq6UCvuT
7Please respect copyright.PENANAdr9zoO7Ke1
「為什麼?」我毫不放棄的再問一次。7Please respect copyright.PENANAui3wZ9tmoP
7Please respect copyright.PENANA69LknR0qvV
「因為……」難得猶豫,在某些時候是顯示一個人的絕對在乎,「我沒有辦法完全放棄。」7Please respect copyright.PENANA1OqswheEyz
7Please respect copyright.PENANAWEFCnECbPK
在聽見這句話的時候,我的心跳聲一瞬間變得很鼓譟,像是要脫離胸膛這樣跳出去一般激烈異常,不過慢慢就平復下來了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAEgLs2OCuMK
7Please respect copyright.PENANAtVtxVeQWKk
然後深深吸了一口氣,我用力眨幾下眼睛之後,撐起身體、對準──7Please respect copyright.PENANAyHA2Jbqc5c
7Please respect copyright.PENANAYPVQUnrpIC
在學長出乎意料的表情中用力親上去!7Please respect copyright.PENANAv8Am3U4h1v
7Please respect copyright.PENANAv4mP3LkmaD
只差沒有直接用撞的了,兩個想太多的人,確實需要狠狠敲一下,之前是我,現在是學長!7Please respect copyright.PENANAdjg3TKgmTX
7Please respect copyright.PENANAdGLPhrkEVv
「因為你需要我,而我也需要你,這就是我自願留下來、也讓你留下來的理由。」7Please respect copyright.PENANAF01VJS3WQI
7Please respect copyright.PENANAA3QDJtIjzO
幾秒之後我就放開搭著學長的手了,非常認真看著他這樣說。7Please respect copyright.PENANAKOZ7vr2LdN
7Please respect copyright.PENANAAy9WS84Ozh
7Please respect copyright.PENANAvbLwJEF1Lt
7Please respect copyright.PENANAKB260DXx6q
ns216.73.216.192da2 7Please respect copyright.PENANAPFk1QKGUlV
「你,不應該放棄,而我,也不應該影響你……去捨棄正常一生。」最後他這樣說,然後就沉默了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAFeevLEwtjV
7Please respect copyright.PENANARzQ3BI6LYW
「……」7Please respect copyright.PENANAMFbOdGOljP
7Please respect copyright.PENANAhv5YnD7grH
……7Please respect copyright.PENANAmoZ9Y9INYm
7Please respect copyright.PENANAkk0iWKu3Em
愣愣的看著學長,我覺得……有點困惑。7Please respect copyright.PENANA467M15sfRv
7Please respect copyright.PENANATZBjbXTxhx
其實他剛剛說的話,並不是像什麼驚雷一樣突然打醒一個人神智還是怎麼的,應該是說,那些我也想過了,不過是彼此角度與立場有點不同。7Please respect copyright.PENANA2eO8lOQlWM
7Please respect copyright.PENANA92VD1DPkrb
突然發現──7Please respect copyright.PENANAGkDvNFRavV
7Please respect copyright.PENANAIjzwmZ6gCX
做這些事我是為了……學長,只有極小的部分是為了自己,那時候放不下的感覺是第一次在我的思維裡出現。7Please respect copyright.PENANAGsfIlfXa9z
7Please respect copyright.PENANAPoM0FtB5nd
隨著成長,我漸漸開始更接近生老病死的周遭,幾次出任務,看見那些喪失親人、愛人的痛苦臉孔漸漸烙印在心底,那時候我就開始想,有一天……7Please respect copyright.PENANA3aPcBP4d6v
7Please respect copyright.PENANAieorhdry2s
有一天這樣事我也會面對,面對親人與有人的離開──我知道我會難過。7Please respect copyright.PENANAeHeRgnwsqy
7Please respect copyright.PENANAMrIluSkhor
而最初時候,也沒也想過什麼假如自己離開了的這種事,直到遇到那位留不住他人的女子後,才不得不意識到一直被努力忽略的,我是妖師,壽命跟人類一樣,但是學長是精靈與獸王族的混血──賽塔已經活了超過兩千年的時光,外表依然年輕,曾未衰老的一切是還能再活得很久、很久的滄桑。7Please respect copyright.PENANASGtU8v9KuQ
7Please respect copyright.PENANAEnUgWWQ4YK
那學長會活多久?7Please respect copyright.PENANAevBhuMX56y
7Please respect copyright.PENANAC4zlJJd0p3
那個曾經的劫難我們已經一起度過,預言師再也沒有為他預言任何災害,所以可以肯定,學長將會活得比想像中的還要久。7Please respect copyright.PENANANCZhxxTB3k
7Please respect copyright.PENANAXRX2UBiodr
我不知道精靈與獸王族血緣在交會之後誕生的生命到底能夠存在於這世上多久,從一些對話推斷至少也是幾千年吧?但我真的不知道。7Please respect copyright.PENANAL1BApE2aJY
7Please respect copyright.PENANAPKb427ZDvw
而不想知道的是,我僅有百年左右的日子,到底……在學長的一生中能算得上什麼?7Please respect copyright.PENANA2m23OInDNJ
7Please respect copyright.PENANArJktY3SZRq
如果他是一個不那麼專情的人、如果他可以遺忘,或許事情就不值得擔心,但是他不是。7Please respect copyright.PENANAgOrHsYR2Dq
7Please respect copyright.PENANApK8lJB613Z
雖然到接受黑山君契約之前我還一直在想,也許我不需要這麼做,甚至害怕著有一天,當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。7Please respect copyright.PENANA1xGSg5XXyl
7Please respect copyright.PENANAprsOuGGQX1
到現在還是不知道學長會什麼會喜歡我,就跟我也不曉得怎麼喜歡上他的一樣,不過他,如此強大、卻總是為我著想……有太多理由我可能會被他吸引,那種心跳的感覺、血液流過的脈動總為他牽引……就是不知道他到底能看上我哪點,還居然在認識不到一年的時間中,就可以為我付出生命。7Please respect copyright.PENANAMvyBbIaUKx
7Please respect copyright.PENANALdpDOXcnP0
所以我害怕又不知道是否該害怕──當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。7Please respect copyright.PENANAM5npeMBnQc
7Please respect copyright.PENANAlPVG6GIS6O
因為我想不透我有什麼地方直得他付出永遠。7Please respect copyright.PENANABmi1gK4RBk
7Please respect copyright.PENANAO63pDCRlDw
只是不願意有任何可能性看見他在漫長的年歲中寂寞,就算是我欠他的,這樣一點回報,我還付得起。7Please respect copyright.PENANAoCkU7n7LX1
7Please respect copyright.PENANA6j8CMcNITW
不過以這些來說,一切都是想多了,很多事情不需要理由,連此刻也是,看他的眼神,我知道我這次選擇沒有錯誤。7Please respect copyright.PENANAFy17bQT67o
7Please respect copyright.PENANARZVLUDN5Cw
……7Please respect copyright.PENANAjVDNmZMsWj
7Please respect copyright.PENANAnX8iswi6og
唯一從沒有想過的是學長的想法。7Please respect copyright.PENANA6PpR9iGMfT
7Please respect copyright.PENANA4N6RU2LsXm
如果我能改變自己的命運,如果我能找到方法留下來,學長怎麼可能不知道、辦不到。7Please respect copyright.PENANAOACNEtQghm
7Please respect copyright.PENANAfSvLqUr8ms
根本就是他不想。7Please respect copyright.PENANAfkwKkTptcs
7Please respect copyright.PENANAIc66Sby511
說不想好像也不太對,應該是說,他放棄了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAmgIccXSWfd
7Please respect copyright.PENANA5dAjEcP7xR
我從沒想過學長也會擔心這些,在他說出來那不長的卻難得的一段話中,我可以捕捉到這些念頭,他早想過了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAR7Nty6kwOp
7Please respect copyright.PENANAvF7tnRBseG
但是比起我害怕看見親人離去,他寧願選擇放手。7Please respect copyright.PENANAX1ClOD5qQ4
7Please respect copyright.PENANAIUVlomXIdx
但是比起我擔心他將不在乎我,他只是想著怎樣對我才是最好。7Please respect copyright.PENANAbjk4AJc02M
7Please respect copyright.PENANATNt1zrA2Im
到頭來,他還是處處為我著想,我不會去說什麼我直不直得他付出這種話,可是……這樣真的好嗎?7Please respect copyright.PENANAeJAiBRGNwZ
7Please respect copyright.PENANA4WLlVJiicX
是不是應該也有什麼事是指有我才能為學長做的,而不是一味讓我接受他的幫助、他的掛心、他……隱晦的愛情?7Please respect copyright.PENANAeC2h4zqJms
7Please respect copyright.PENANA5VZEiFqv8n
真的會有嗎?7Please respect copyright.PENANAEsnPGIS0vC
7Please respect copyright.PENANAk4JBuziFjl
「學長……」慢慢的,我小心翼翼的把手搭上學長肩膀,勾著那銀亮髮絲與中間垂下的一縷血色。7Please respect copyright.PENANARlMIMvoV8D
7Please respect copyright.PENANADJF9tbc8NG
「嗯?」他的眼神,大概是不太明白我會想說什麼的樣子。7Please respect copyright.PENANAw17bISMuh4
7Please respect copyright.PENANAf5rQyj5wXI
這時我知道,有的,一定有什麼是我能為他做的。7Please respect copyright.PENANAOyILgLhpCb
7Please respect copyright.PENANAteB0JzGGLH
不再需要質疑──他真的需要我,而我也需要他……7Please respect copyright.PENANAO3x7rloX6f
7Please respect copyright.PENANAg4bqIMeSO8
「那個啊……」忍不住又騰出一隻手刮了一下臉,「既然你這麼想,也這麼決定了,那……為什麼還去找那個盒精?聽說那東西,並不好拿。」7Please respect copyright.PENANABDrmwoPsYN
7Please respect copyright.PENANAecOlqzKheQ
事實上根本並不是不好拿,而是幾乎不可能拿得到,也不會是一念之間,想去拿就可以順利拿到的東西。7Please respect copyright.PENANAKX6qIDTVAJ
7Please respect copyright.PENANA69fFOCd8tm
白川主我原本裝黑石的抽屜裡,特別留下了關於缺憾盒精的一些事。7Please respect copyright.PENANAXkV9jr4Cjv
7Please respect copyright.PENANA35X5eYxZOF
「……」聽到這問話,學長有一瞬間得錯愕也有一瞬間的明瞭。7Please respect copyright.PENANAH1cq6UCvuT
7Please respect copyright.PENANAdr9zoO7Ke1
「為什麼?」我毫不放棄的再問一次。7Please respect copyright.PENANAui3wZ9tmoP
7Please respect copyright.PENANA69LknR0qvV
「因為……」難得猶豫,在某些時候是顯示一個人的絕對在乎,「我沒有辦法完全放棄。」7Please respect copyright.PENANA1OqswheEyz
7Please respect copyright.PENANAWEFCnECbPK
在聽見這句話的時候,我的心跳聲一瞬間變得很鼓譟,像是要脫離胸膛這樣跳出去一般激烈異常,不過慢慢就平復下來了。7Please respect copyright.PENANAEgLs2OCuMK
7Please respect copyright.PENANAtVtxVeQWKk
然後深深吸了一口氣,我用力眨幾下眼睛之後,撐起身體、對準──7Please respect copyright.PENANAyHA2Jbqc5c
7Please respect copyright.PENANAYPVQUnrpIC
在學長出乎意料的表情中用力親上去!7Please respect copyright.PENANAv8Am3U4h1v
7Please respect copyright.PENANAv4mP3LkmaD
只差沒有直接用撞的了,兩個想太多的人,確實需要狠狠敲一下,之前是我,現在是學長!7Please respect copyright.PENANAdjg3TKgmTX
7Please respect copyright.PENANAdGLPhrkEVv
「因為你需要我,而我也需要你,這就是我自願留下來、也讓你留下來的理由。」7Please respect copyright.PENANAF01VJS3WQI
7Please respect copyright.PENANAA3QDJtIjzO
幾秒之後我就放開搭著學長的手了,非常認真看著他這樣說。7Please respect copyright.PENANAKOZ7vr2LdN
7Please respect copyright.PENANAAy9WS84Ozh
7Please respect copyright.PENANAvbLwJEF1Lt
7Please respect copyright.PENANAKB260DXx6q