文: 譚嘉燕 FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/katetam1228/
沉靜,應該睡去的夜裡,可能都埋藏著人們只可獨自一個人玩的小把戲。這份快樂來自那份秘密感只有自己能暗暗享受。393Please respect copyright.PENANAsNNvHk6uY0
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寒流來襲,令人有暖意小確幸就是躲在被窩裡,吸取著自己散落的溫度,被自己製造的小世界包裹著,與紛紛擾擾的外在世界一刀切割。393Please respect copyright.PENANAXFLgmCH9Rv
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被窩裡的世界,也是仲淇的秘密小世界。393Please respect copyright.PENANAwMNzL3EDYR
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凌晨兩時,本應還在夢鄉的時份,但淺眠的仲淇卻睡醒了。393Please respect copyright.PENANAp8U0Ho8iyv
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仲淇搔搔自己凌亂的長髮,靈機一閃,她把頭也縮進了厚厚的純白色綿被中。393Please respect copyright.PENANAd5T7AlUnvE
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仲淇閉著眼,感受著自己的身體慢慢穩定地像在浮空中般沉下去,輕輕的,輕輕的,沉下去。393Please respect copyright.PENANA435pi2h7Cp
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直到,她感受到自己安然落在一片柔軟的草地上,她才緩緩在溫和明媚的日光中張開雙眼。她看見熟悉的景像,她置身於一望無際廣闊的草原上,這裡永遠都是充滿生氣的春天,是回暖的季節。393Please respect copyright.PENANAPOoUEt5Q2S
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仲淇還穿著她的粉紅色波點睡衣,和白色卡通貓襪子。雖然她已經快要三十歲了,但還是保持著一份孩子氣。393Please respect copyright.PENANAZMsaJ2ZLPU
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三年了,每次當仲淇覺得在現實世界裡感到侷促,她就會躲到這裡來。393Please respect copyright.PENANAD7RHPuAwy6
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當初她剛發現這個被窩裡的世界時也很驚訝:「為何我的被窩下收藏著這片森林?」393Please respect copyright.PENANAjUTIubFMYf
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至今她仍然不知道,但她好好享受其中就是了。393Please respect copyright.PENANAo5E7atsMef
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這裡不只有她一人,有時候,她會遇到一位灰色短髮、戴著黑帽子、穿著白色襯衫的年輕男孩,他永遠光著腳丫子。393Please respect copyright.PENANAooH6p6vxsh
393Please respect copyright.PENANArjG31C2NBH
仲淇與男孩偶爾會聊一下天,她知道他叫阿猛。他們會說說這陣子彼此的生活,但就是沒一起追究過他們可以在此交往相遇的理由。而且更大多數時間,他們是各自在這片大草原上休息,或自由活動,曬曬太陽呀,坐著想東西呀,聽聽大自然的聲音去放空,什麼都好。再回到不可愛的現實世界時,仲淇都可以重新得到力量。393Please respect copyright.PENANAOd3suNGiae
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在相同空間裡,彼此看見對方,卻相視微笑,不作打擾,彷彿有無形的默契與交流飄散空氣中。393Please respect copyright.PENANAVxCUnh0DwT
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今天,仲淇再次遇見那位灰髮男孩。仲淇在這裡的模樣會隨著現實世界的前進而有所改變,但灰髮男孩永遠都是同一個樣子,永恆不變。393Please respect copyright.PENANAxlbmpKiUgT
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注視著灰髮男孩——阿猛的單眼皮眼睛,仲淇先開口:「其實,我們要不要嘗嘗在現實世界裡見面呀?」她形容到好像網友見面似的。393Please respect copyright.PENANA0FJxl67Ftj
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阿猛一步一步向她走過去:「為什麼?在這裡交往比較夢幻呀。」393Please respect copyright.PENANATKRvXb16rJ
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仲淇其實是好奇阿猛在現實世界中的樣子,但她沒說出口。393Please respect copyright.PENANAN5uaOqwQqu
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仲淇思索如何編一個原因才好:「唔……」393Please respect copyright.PENANAMx2RTx6v8j
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阿猛有著一對「笑眼」,笑起來眼睛彎成像月亮:「還是不要啦,我們在這裡見面就好了。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAmgpT6sDWW2
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仲淇心裡好像有點失望:「嗯。保持一點點神秘的未知空間。」393Please respect copyright.PENANA7FxghkRgPq
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她有時走在現實的街上,遇見過好幾位很像阿猛的男生,但最後她認真望明確一點,就會發現他們不是同一個人,只是輪廓像樣,卻不是真正的他。情況也像她交過五個男朋友,每次都覺得那個他就是生命中的另一半了,最後繞了一大圈,跌撞過才發現,原來並不是「他」。393Please respect copyright.PENANAj9e4Hqtkgz
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仲淇第一次跟他說起愛情的事情:「你現在有交女朋友嗎?」393Please respect copyright.PENANAGIZoAtPZY2
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可能三年來他們都沒聊過關於感情上的事情,阿猛臉龐僵硬了一下下,但又很快回復自然:「沒有呀。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAig21cUV5OD
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仲淇察覺不到,其實她心中暗喜:「那之前呢?交往過多少個女友?」她盤問下去。393Please respect copyright.PENANAbaGm2eF8yT
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阿猛笑笑:「為什麼突然這麼好奇我的感情世界,那妳又如何?」393Please respect copyright.PENANAXCrjprZQNU
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想起自己的愛情運,仲淇頭上彷彿冒出一片烏雲:「我的愛情運太差勁了,交過五個男友,但我不是被劈腿,就是無故被說個性不合就分手了。現在我單身。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAuEbFmloIgA
393Please respect copyright.PENANA9T4gqDvnoP
阿猛聽著聽著,心也苦澀起來,他知道,她的愛情霉運,可能都是他的原故。393Please respect copyright.PENANAv4FolMqCXX
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仲淇追問:「那你交往過多少個女友?」她心臟跳動得愈來愈快。393Please respect copyright.PENANAB3payc2FLo
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他們就這樣站在離對方差三步距離的對面。393Please respect copyright.PENANAVfkUYn5rVx
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阿猛回過神來,搔搔頭:「三個。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAuFQ49Nu3wC
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仲淇瞪大雙眼:「看你好像才二十出頭,就交過三個女朋友了?每次交往時間都很短吧。」393Please respect copyright.PENANASGznPxgHna
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阿猛沒有正面回答:「嗯……」393Please respect copyright.PENANARMvqqN2iIs
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好奇心一旦打開,仲淇就收不回了:「那最後一個女友呀,你是什麼原因跟她分手的?」她想知道更多。393Please respect copyright.PENANAPpT9Awf4gZ
回想到當天的情形,阿猛記憶猶新,恐懼感重回感官,身體不禁微微發抖起來。393Please respect copyright.PENANAwbCDdvUI78
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仲淇見狀,揮揮手:「你沒事吧?我們還是聊別的好了。」她想轉移氣氛,她猜可能他落入當時分手的感傷中吧。393Please respect copyright.PENANAAaJcmPsWbs
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而阿猛一個轉身,就背著仲淇沒有停留地走遠了。393Please respect copyright.PENANAc58dZoSgP6
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他們再見面,是三個月後的事情了。經過上次,仲淇再望著阿猛,都有種戰戰兢兢的感覺。393Please respect copyright.PENANAQCUY7XSqxY
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他們並肩坐在草地上,仲淇換了一件黑色的睡衣,阿猛仍舊同一件白色襯衫。393Please respect copyright.PENANA77bfp22P5U
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這次先開口的,是阿猛。393Please respect copyright.PENANAUXzavMc71k
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阿猛的笑容很溫柔,彷彿上次他們分開時是以快樂的方式結束的:「妳相信宿命嗎?」393Please respect copyright.PENANAFCFBIWVRex
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仲淇認真思考:「我應該相信吧。世界裡有注定的命運,但人也要努力去推動命運,而不是無力的只是坐下來任由擺佈。」393Please respect copyright.PENANA8hM52UPrkX
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阿猛再問:「那妳覺得世上真的有命中注定的姻緣,命中注定的另一半嗎?」他神情顯得有點緊張。393Please respect copyright.PENANAn54cnYKKoX
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其實仲淇常常思考這問題:「我現在對此很悲觀,可能真的有命定的伴侶這回事,但我覺得,可能我這輩子都會單身,遇不到彼此喜歡的人了。」她已經三年沒遇到過會讓她心動的男人了,可能這就是心如止水。393Please respect copyright.PENANAytmLsDIzct
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阿猛語重心長,用著不像年輕人的口吻鼓勵她說:「其實,一個人也可以好好過日子吧。就算單身一輩子,妳也可以精彩地過妳的人生的。」393Please respect copyright.PENANA3YR5scxoN8
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仲淇推推他肩膀,吃吃的笑:「喂,不要這樣咀咒我吧,心底裡我還是想結婚的。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAwITyEuO8Xh
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仲淇以一半認真,一半玩笑的語氣說:「我有時傷春悲秋時會幻想呀,可能我的另一半已在一百年前出生,又死去了。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAVqlAKAv6Tf
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阿猛心裡泛起悲傷,但他也故作輕鬆:「可能我也會單身一輩子呀,現在我不會覺得有遺憾,所以妳也要勇敢一個人活下去。」393Please respect copyright.PENANA4lRstJCYTd
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當時,仲淇不懂他的話,只覺得那時的氛圍突然變得好凝重。393Please respect copyright.PENANA4NstsF15Aq
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直到今天,某位同事跟仲淇聊起女生逼婚男友的話題,同事給了她看一則新聞報道。393Please respect copyright.PENANA0YHGNLaqeA
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仲淇看到了,阿猛的照片。這是他,這真的是他的模樣。她沒想到,在現實世界裡第一次見到他,是在報紙的照片上。393Please respect copyright.PENANAJQR2mkzl0R
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三年前,因工作壓力患上心理病的女生在家裡逼婚男生,二十三歲,穿著白襯衫、黑帽子的男生不肯這麼年輕就步入婚姻,讓敏感多疑的女生發瘋,大吵大鬧自編故事說男生劈腿,最後,她用刀子劃下悲劇。因鄰居聽到整個爭吵過程報警而趕來的警察也無能為力了。393Please respect copyright.PENANA2XpusEJDWM
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仲淇的眼淚奪眶而出,腦海也閃過她與他從三年前相識以來的零碎片段。393Please respect copyright.PENANAWb63cWBoMr
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之後,仲淇差不多都要隔上好幾星期才會在草原上再遇見阿猛。393Please respect copyright.PENANAq3tk3yCLV2
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他的笑容仍然溫柔,又夾雜著一點點悵然。她穿回一套粉紅色的睡衣,和白色卡通貓襪子。393Please respect copyright.PENANA0m2b3k80S9
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她和他,仍舊是偶爾聊天,但太多數時間都只是相視一笑而已。393Please respect copyright.PENANAKuXCyMC368
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她開始會給他一個短暫而永恆的擁抱,或者坐下聊天時,把頭輕輕放在他肩上。而他就會不敢動,但會破壞那一刻的安靜。她知道,每一晚,她都不會、也不是孤獨地睡去,因這裡會有他一直的陪伴。393Please respect copyright.PENANAOBQ94SxLMc
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這裡永遠都是充滿生氣的春天,是回暖的季節。393Please respect copyright.PENANALEssttLp9A
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她以一半認真,一半玩笑的語氣說:「我有時傷春悲秋時會幻想,可能我的另一半已在一百年前出生,又死去了。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAZFREZbahn7
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他也故作輕鬆:「可能我也會單身一輩子呀,現在我不會覺得有遺憾,所以妳也要勇敢一個人活下去。」393Please respect copyright.PENANAUPVxqTkQHy
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