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《枯郎收音機》奶……男孩子
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作者 枯郎劇縮
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  • G: 大眾
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《枯郎收音機》奶……男孩子
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枯郎劇縮
Jul 11, 2018
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No Plagiarism!gbeThsFboAXaUDnNXnt1posted on PENANA

不少聽到有人形容:「男生就是個用下半身思考的動物!」copyright protection6PENANAR1OGEeQWkU10Please respect copyright.PENANAz3ztOkgYnG

10Please respect copyright.PENANAdctAMIXBDK
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身為一名英俊瀟灑、人見人愛、花見花開的男孩子,每每聽到此類言論,都有不少想法。copyright protection6PENANAKvuF9Rt6fW10Please respect copyright.PENANASA6r3VLjU9

10Please respect copyright.PENANA08ltI8bGJP
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所以特別想用一種嚴肅、認真並且憤慨的筆吻來回答它們:「沒有錯。」雖然不能說隨時,但大部份都是。copyright protection6PENANAxO6DiC1eMz10Please respect copyright.PENANAYGP58T0TdV

10Please respect copyright.PENANA2d3oHMwTtg
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當然此言論不能概刮所以男性,不過80%也許有。縱使想法怪異如我,在這一方面倒是不愧對我這帶把的身體。copyright protection6PENANACsfAo2cyFK10Please respect copyright.PENANAfKy5PGZQAd

10Please respect copyright.PENANALCqP18Cy15
copyright protection6PENANA3cyaQQMR4z10Please respect copyright.PENANAOJZzLKrPKd

「男生平均多久想一次色色的事?」上次聽到有人在討論這樣一個話題,很有趣,也得確值得研究。copyright protection6PENANArD6xGiMAY710Please respect copyright.PENANAH0Yf6NV6Ew

10Please respect copyright.PENANAjq9KfaSRJT
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在說出我的答案前,我得先說句實話。要寫這類文章真的不容易,因為大多數男生包括我,是不會和其它人討論「你一星期打幾次」、「都想著誰打」、「打一次多久」等等私密和關係善良風俗的話題。copyright protection6PENANA7AUGKKwxCB10Please respect copyright.PENANALVsKbzy7Fc

10Please respect copyright.PENANADZCMJSWBKF
copyright protection6PENANA64ecCUvouu10Please respect copyright.PENANAvHd9DkzkTN

一是沒那個恥力。copyright protection6PENANAvf55fh3hEz10Please respect copyright.PENANAMFJfpUOX1u

二是我不想知道我朋友家人在他幻想中的世界。copyright protection6PENANAYM9SsUDZrg10Please respect copyright.PENANAaEtMqdFnPp

三是……多久多大,不會有願意先講的男人。如果你是男人在看這文章,相信我,不管怎麼樣,我的都比你大一公分、持久一分鐘。copyright protection6PENANAAylPLXJgme10Please respect copyright.PENANA3l6huJC34v

10Please respect copyright.PENANARQaB5zvUxx
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拉回來,平均多久想一次?copyright protection6PENANAAYzKR1Eu1610Please respect copyright.PENANAz3gFlLpXPt

10Please respect copyright.PENANAsHkDiqdNkK
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沒有平均,相信我,一個男生如果在可以想,那他一定不是在想,就是在準備想的過程中。copyright protection6PENANAqshTjfCrgD10Please respect copyright.PENANAEGdVmyGLwv

10Please respect copyright.PENANAfYdzBv0Ojk
copyright protection6PENANAeRBNBsOgXP10Please respect copyright.PENANAzE41aGYkp6

但也不是隨時隨人都會想,至少我在菜市場和阿婆聊天時……哦那畫面太美別讓他在我腦裡超過3秒。copyright protection6PENANAnIs2PTsT4910Please respect copyright.PENANAu3MHY8gFUM

我要說的是,不會有人工作到一半突然靈光一閃:「胸部!」除非你就是"幹"這一行的。copyright protection6PENANAjuBBoUQ1m710Please respect copyright.PENANAb9LoJnTJcc

10Please respect copyright.PENANA4LQ8N1OMme
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所以走在路上、在家、經過小學……嗯?等等,我家門口有人在敲門了,我去開……奶子!copyright protection6PENANA2dpugfnI8s10Please respect copyright.PENANAB7RnwAKqkW

10Please respect copyright.PENANACoItxvvlhR
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咳!相信我,雖然我常說想在腦子上裝個拉鏈讓大家知道我在想什麼,但真要裝,可能得容我先去當和尚修行個十年。copyright protection6PENANA01lYhIy0Up10Please respect copyright.PENANAjGda3KLOa6

10Please respect copyright.PENANAKNutg2YMnf
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到此,「多久想一次」應該有了答案吧。copyright protection6PENANAguWdYYzmSW10Please respect copyright.PENANA5anjkr46fe

10Please respect copyright.PENANAc01HtiJr47
copyright protection6PENANA7SXsRfbqg510Please respect copyright.PENANAHJ575WmHVc

所以再來還有一個問題我認為值得講:「男生都在想什麼?」指色色的方面。copyright protection6PENANAQX2t4tnrhZ10Please respect copyright.PENANAo1nLlHdpOs

10Please respect copyright.PENANAE0tFIWXro2
copyright protection6PENANAVyuSMsQlPJ10Please respect copyright.PENANAz6LEeRBAyx

說實話,如果妳是女生並且在看這個文章,又耐住性子看到了這邊,我想為了妳等等看待妳爸妳哥妳身邊所有男人的眼光,還是打住吧!copyright protection6PENANAhWCeptuAUK10Please respect copyright.PENANANXyaJUSWkG

10Please respect copyright.PENANApYHSDpPBRe
copyright protection6PENANAFKHIeMbCet10Please respect copyright.PENANAEqlq5zhGaQ

「想什麼?」說實話因人而異,譬如有人喜歡小的、有人喜歡短髮、有人喜歡寵物玩法……等等。copyright protection6PENANAC9261OyS9o10Please respect copyright.PENANAdXNM8wH1t1

但我要講的點不是怎麼玩,而是對誰對什麼。這一點基本可以說,萬變不離其中!copyright protection6PENANACrkeGJIajC10Please respect copyright.PENANAISZpLDPAfG

10Please respect copyright.PENANAPT7ajcJBTU
copyright protection6PENANAUZnCHCpTeD10Please respect copyright.PENANAr7SfT0LA2e

這裡我再分兩個:平時想,和進行生理自X反應(以下用打飛機統稱)。copyright protection6PENANAnQNpWPdvHn10Please respect copyright.PENANACK7B9SfYtu

10Please respect copyright.PENANAFinMsHZciT
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在平時,男生如果年紀超過青春期,就會有個經驗,千萬不要想太深入!copyright protection6PENANATzhgcYSBS710Please respect copyright.PENANA06M7IW0XVt

10Please respect copyright.PENANAsALPnexnqP
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為什麼?因為我不想頂個硬硬的東西在下面,特別是穿窄款褲子,真的…很不舒服。copyright protection6PENANAgjT5xsAvIg10Please respect copyright.PENANAylLltthtrc

再者濕濕的不是很好過……為何會濕,請去上國中健教課。copyright protection6PENANAMCP3S22LEV10Please respect copyright.PENANAXTNIJaWgxn

10Please respect copyright.PENANA6OUG4rgeXB
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所以不外乎就只是對:奶子、臉、腿、臀部……等等的眼睛療養,再進就是簡單想象的肢體接觸。copyright protection6PENANAnYsh4ZJFvs10Please respect copyright.PENANAlRu8AdiwuQ

10Please respect copyright.PENANAUAEPhJgxYe
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而這事積攢時間過長,就會出現「能量釋放」,俗稱打飛機。copyright protection6PENANAjCkusgjc4110Please respect copyright.PENANAf5jJeTWxqr

10Please respect copyright.PENANAok129jMpRK
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對象為Everyone,只要在他的審美觀中是喜歡的,不管是妳、妳的朋友、朋友的朋友、朋友的…媽媽?都會在其中。copyright protection6PENANAVFB0rXYelH10Please respect copyright.PENANA62RqM5jJCJ

10Please respect copyright.PENANAa03c3dvPCm
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啊!女生們,這絕對不是精神出軌,不然為什麼妳們要看韓劇,雖然很帥、雖然如果可以也許也會嫁給他,但事實是,沒有,因為沒辨法(? 在這一層關係上,他還是愛妳,只是在打飛機時請給他在腦內一個自由的權利。copyright protection6PENANAulOvayBY1l10Please respect copyright.PENANAqgchGYm0HY

10Please respect copyright.PENANAKRZN421zSD
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到此快接近這文章的尾聲,對於男人是下半身考的動物我想多少有些概念,那為了幫一些女生解決一個「如何讓他完全不想那些事呢?」我想了一下,想到了。copyright protection6PENANADnRXo0KGtJ10Please respect copyright.PENANAbEgnVXliX3

10Please respect copyright.PENANAhHVgvZjwzb
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等他打完。我絕對不是在唬爛。copyright protection6PENANArvpsonVeiC10Please respect copyright.PENANAFxxVVtShLQ

10Please respect copyright.PENANAk2yfj4eCAN
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進入賢者時間,屆時妳才會看到一位心中了無雜念,視情色於糞土的好男人。copyright protection6PENANAm7KrZeGqkU10Please respect copyright.PENANAnuIUpDniU8

10Please respect copyright.PENANA9fbIvuMJ6n
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而維持時間,大概一小時。copyright protection6PENANALtTLKMa3qe10Please respect copyright.PENANAkQk3KKH83C

10Please respect copyright.PENANAgcRsUmWH62
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最後,我要說……說那什麼來著?啊!屁股。copyright protection6PENANAPFUfX83Ch5

54.162.128.159

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