根據居民的指示，我沿著竹林小徑走了一整天，終於到達目的地：一間全竹結構的寺廟。它比我預想中更為破落，冷冷清清的。我抬頭望向高高懸掛在山門的匾額，寫著「竹寺」。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDjZuNR1d8l
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7I7QWmv2g3
蠻有意思的名字。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBV3McKwzf
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCXEtR12ak
當我正要邁步內進時，一個打扮樸素的瘦削大叔剛好開門踏出。四目交投，雙方都愣住了幾秒。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaWcQtpeZq7
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbisZhik6rW
「歡迎內進。」沒等我回答，大叔已轉身為我引路。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3ykXz0XtV
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJmUt6HrIjO
眼見天色漸暗，我不再磨蹭，看能否找到綫索，省卻逗留此地的時間：「不好意思喔，大叔！請問黃XX女士住在這裡嗎？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCIyjYovEaU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ26kY5MzF67
大叔的腳步突兀地戛然而止。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBskmmieMs
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXy9ui4Pm63
是我的提問過於唐突嗎？357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxfi5TFIlzt
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV0RKDFPiCl
大叔回頭仔細打量我，神色疑惑，似乎在猜測我和黃女士的關係。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLsuwUErr4
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYpQPH5fBO
「有人託我將信件親手轉交予黃女士。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWg0sdeUkaE
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNaBQ0EYRro
「黃女士已離開這裡好一段時間，不知何時會回來……甚或是不知會否回來。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYLNhLPjCHI
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtaDOA89gSB
「她有透露去處嗎？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4Rc5uqqbT
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqalurKXhhO
「沒有……我帶你去她昔日的房間試找綫索。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ117iqdnlIH
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwqiKKeU5G
大叔再次邁步，步履沒有之前的輕，重若銀鉛。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe9gZXiLqBP
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRFdr696glj
陰冷的空氣，空洞的房間，慘白的牆身，最基本的傢俬和雜物。沒有生活的氣息。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkMmL3YJYP2
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRbGthngCW6
「剛才在門外碰見你，也還真令我驚訝。」大叔沒有進入房間，逕自在門外呢呢喃喃。「竹寺曾香火鼎盛。後來毗鄰的兩個小鎮分別新建更大更金碧輝煌的寺廟，無意間將信眾分流開去，到來竹寺掛單的僧侶亦逐漸減少，住持最終徇眾要求到另一寺廟主持大局。他指派我長駐於此，打掃清潔，說要方便途經的旅客。我一直覺得他想多了，豈料今天就遇見你。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJszWCe3Iy3
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9a2im7x9y
「可能佛祖不想我白走一趟。」我話中有話，提醒侍奉佛祖的大叔不要忘記佛祖的存在，萬萬不能撒謊。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc4g69RtJ8v
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1hPwMw8AR
「我可以明天帶你見住持。他有掛單紀錄，可能有黃女士的聯絡資料。」大叔也不是省油的燈，簡單幾句就將我逼至沒有退路的位置：「但我希望你能先對我坦白事情的前因後果。住持是個大忙人。我可不希望為他增添不必要的麻煩。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8OPJ8xPsk
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqgVYSfaVT
我只得坦白交代。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSDK1LhbkIk
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGlsPC6b2nu
我的妻子過身了。臨終前，她希望我能預留一年時間為她完成唯一的遺願：親手將遺書交予離家出走多年的生母——黃女士。事隔多年，黃女士曾在多個地方落腳。我每次根據綫索趕至時，她早已遷居。輾轉間，我追尋至竹寺……357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRavHyIHnb
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMUOWmncOw7
「距離一年限期，還剩多少日子？」大叔生起關切之情。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvhO46T8Vcr
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZzyAyva2L
「三日。竹寺很可能是我的最後機會。」我加倍留意他的神色舉止。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLdKB0Mgble
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJcCN2XcLt1
「不考慮延長？」大叔表現出來的的關切絕對超過一個陌生人該有的限度。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNHCmmIf0N
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lNkuPwO6v
「妻子信緣份。她認為努力過後仍沒能找到，證明彼此有緣無份，毋須強求。她還叮囑我要燒毀遺書。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqGRnVRtrQf
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurPTMzPRi1
大叔若有所思後，講出驚人的一句：「若果一年期限屆滿時仍找不到黃女士，介意給我看看遺書嗎？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgf0TqCLpQ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzbCWgrQl6
「極度介意！」我心裡認定大叔有事隱瞞。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxYgwCK3Vw
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL4G1HYTCBs
尷尬氣氛令大叔不再多話。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSH3fAa3jz
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSth785Ee7P
晚餐後，大叔在其他地方忙著，我則留在房間對著愛妻的照片痛哭一場。哭過以後，壓力得以紓緩，但心頭卻未能添加半分澄明，混沌混濁。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡci0FvPykNu
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuLnZLHKgK
我離房在寺內溜達散心。逛著逛著，忽爾看見大叔彎腰對著花園中的小樹喁喁細語，臉上盡是蜜甜。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQVk09neDcS
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR7Q4R7Ro5s
我上前跟大叔打招呼。他微笑回應，和顏悅色，渾身散發著慈祥氣息，沒有白天時的隔膜。我嘗試放下戒心，開心見誠與他聊天。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2ymvUcK2r
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwdnZeHDzpe
不知怎地，聊著聊著，話題竟牽到大叔的心事去。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCKuek59kEs
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡif56vKYdCn
「貪，使人執著於一切順情之境。嗔，使人執著於一切違情之境。痴，使人不明白真理，致使生起貪嗔。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcQzo4BkNC
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf22Jj5dNvE
我痴愚半生，痛苦不已。到此地求法，希望住持指點迷津。但他認為我凡心未盡，要我留在這裡靜思。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZH2eliXOwO
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxhcPzjTfE
我在竹寺侍奉多年，住持依然不為所動。我以為他在敷衍我。今天遇到你，我才明白住持所言非虛：任何無關的人事物都可輕易勾起我對逝去伴侶的思念。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVEcX6vjYKU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTZ5H0hP88R
我終於明白初時大叔何以對我不太友善。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ8ouO2P7q7
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4IBjdxF6gg
將心比心。喪妻之後，任何人事物均能勾起我和對太太的思念。我曾抱怨上天幸災樂禍，何解不讓我安靜避世。我已盡力放下身邊一切，辭掉工作，不聯絡親友，遷出愛巢，但偏偏愛妻的遺願就是要我去彌補她的畢生遺憾！我沒有一刻能放下她，因為我的分分秒秒就是為她而過。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVXxYxhILI3
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflD4kNlvSy
那種痛苦實非筆墨所能形容。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHl8f6THNeQ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThHWi1UtRx
「你的妻子真聰明，給你的痛苦設下一年期限。只要你在這一年裡拼命為她圓願，往後也就了無遺憾或悔疚。我可沒那麼幸運，不知要拖著這副臭皮囊乾等到哪年哪月哪日……」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSM0P5Bj9ZD
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgQIhBIk8M
說罷，他跟我和小樹說晚安，然後揚長而去。
翌日，我翻遍整間竹寺亦找不到大叔，只在他的房間找到他留給我的手繪地圖。我跟著地圖的指示走了大半天，來到住持現處的寺廟。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMgDZgPzu2
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfDtfbONJwW
住持聽罷我的經歷後，不禁黯然慨嘆：「黃女士始終凡心未盡……」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLliyo1qzhQ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNR28BnEpm
黃女士當年拋夫棄女，與情夫私奔。豈料甜蜜日子不長久，情夫患急病逝世。黃女士大受打擊，認為是自己作孽甚深，連累情夫。她來到竹寺，望住持能指點迷津。住持認為她深陷激動情緒當中，容易作出錯誤選擇，逐要她在竹寺靜思己過。可惜她半夜逃離。當黃女士重臨竹寺時，她已花光積蓄在黑市做手術整容及變性，以情夫的外表現身……357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqTMQCwAG56
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmRjttlkr9F
「大叔就是黃女士？」我不禁驚呼。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcy8E43sVT
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmMEYSBqJC
震驚之情瞬間即逝，取而代之的是說不出的矛盾。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUwkP0g1Di
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa6yVh0rEE6
這個人，我恨不來，亦原諒不了。
翌日，我和住持往竹寺走一趟。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjMB9YjRU8
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfWK6LoIQR
寺前，我倆不約而同抬頭望向匾額。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjUPs22ffC
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXO3TTOg6w
「你知道『竹寺』何以得名嗎？」住持問。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyL0mfRstKi
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ511pyOY5H6
「等？」我的猜想有如初來之時。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUnYfQ54n7U
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPWKGUIrUhj
「這名字只不過是客觀描述寺廟本身。」住持揚手指向全竹結構的寺廟：「大家實在想多了，對自己的想像投放情感，賦予它過多的意義，致使看不見眼前真象。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHHj6dCIiiu
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK5n3Nzq9rg
我驀地憶起大叔前夜的說話。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡatR1H2E9N9
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlje78CLzf
住持直接走往花園。不出他所料，小樹已被連根拔起，樹下土地被挖出一個大坑，足以容納一個成人。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNukeselJlz
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJLosU2OJJ
我心頭一涼，頓時明白那是甚麼一回事：多年以來，情夫的屍首一直埋在這裡。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQzVyzcUT8X
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Fuz8Dmeba
我鼻頭一酸，淚如雨下。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTuAr7rU49o
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgaSBSeOjn
「『強逼自己放下執著』也是一種執著。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4GW9QwjWaY
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgyzH9Nws7P
住持淡然望天，開始為一切生者亡者誦經。
