[FANFIC - HBD, KARIN!] PÉRIODICITÉ (SK)
Title: périodicité530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY4uKIet6JP
By: Kanae (Goth-Punk88 @ ff.net)530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlH79jGfN7
Rating: K+530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz5zvh3ulop
Word Count: 2.817530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtjmfnFuf4O
Author's Notes: Made for our "Karin's birthday week" over at the Ice&Spice FC @ NF ♥ I... don't even know what this is, or where it came from, and it's possibly one of the cheesiest pieces I've written for SK. But I kind of regret nothing lol - Oh and that novice drawing at the top of the fic? yup, mines. guilty as charged orz530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzEcPzN8pHu
Summary: June 20 has never been an ordinary day for one Uzumaki Karin.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHxXFS4hrf
périodicité (periodicity)530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsfqiZR8yb8
"recurrence at regular intervals of time."
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périodicité;530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUtcvpojf7
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by Kanae
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“Don’t look so down, darling. This is a great chance for you.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSiBph6agEb
“…Yeah… a great chance to make a fool of myself, you mean.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW9erN9iH70
A twinkling laugh, a delicate hand warmly lands over a girl’s head and—
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At twelve, there aren’t many things that Karin has done or that she wishes to do. She is just an ordinary girl from an ordinary family living in an ordinary village; there is nothing special about her, nothing out of the norm, nothing that makes her stand out—if one ignores her flagrant red hair, that is.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9yCsfiHP0P
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But that is just what her father seems to have wanted to do all along.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgpahvw957c
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You’re going out? Don’t forget to put your hood on, Karin, he would say, whenever Karin had to wander away from the immediate realms of their home. Why, papa? She used to ask when she was no more than a little girl; but that was a habit that slowly but surely withered and died as she began to grow up—as she started to grow aware enough to notice the wary air her father’s kind, wise red eyes acquired as the reminder left his lips.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgYm7ZWEG4d
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As she grew older, Karin learned to recognize it for what it truly was: more a warning than a piece of advice; and she began to grow more jittery as result, more worn at the seams.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC26Y1xXrso
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Her red hair was her only outstanding trait, the only thing that made her different—without it, Karin may as well fade into the scenery.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIzC7KGW5y
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She may as well not exist.
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—and ruffles her hair.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVgNuHnc9OE
“Now, now, don’t be like that. I have a good feeling about this, you know?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zvpJ1Q1OV
“…What do you mean, mama?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8IwGyPuSuu
A secretive smile highlighted by—
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At thirteen, Karin nearly dies.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3POBuGmP7U
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And then she is saved—saved by a striking boy with a rich voice and eyes that warm her up to the core the moment he smiles—at her, for her—and suddenly, Karin does not feel so ordinary anymore.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnV6nr9mvIE
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There is something different about you, her mother tells her once with a knowing smile, ever since you came back from Konoha.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvbJoe1O3G
Karin jumps in her seat, awkward denial bubbling up in her throat and evaporating the moment her mother laughs, I like it. You look prettier, Karin.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOSmjr4Ucs7
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She does not know about that—can’t see any difference as she looks at herself in the mirror, self-consciously pulling on some strands of red hair and squinting at her reflection.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Yj5q0pwGr
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What she does know, though—what she can’t forget, is—530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2eVsK4MpwF
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See ya, he had said, and it takes Karin a surprising amount of time to realize that, for the first time since she could remember, there was something she wanted.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbkd0ZMjnr
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Wanted for herself; not for her parents, not for those she cares about. Something that was completely hers, in all its staggering intensity and youthful hope.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9b71dvxQYR
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See ya, he had said, and until then Karin had never quite known how good it felt to feel alive.
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—by amber eyes that seem to spark.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERdRthfpj6
“Ara~ I wonder if I should tell you. It is a safely guarded secret, you see.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsL96yyKdGE
“I will keep it! I promise, I won’t tell anybody, mama!”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXxNOnVRG1
A chuckle, “Alright, alright! Since you insist, I'll tell you. It—”
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At fourteen, Karin breathes her last breath.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8G9nxmb87p
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There is no blood—not hers—involved, nor are there any wounds—not physical ones—or any white walls or tunnels and gates of light—no light, only dark—only smoke—only the smell of burnt flesh and intest—530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrzUjvSdOXw
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There is, however, anguish. An agony so great that Karin bit her lip until it bled, fisted her palms until her nails left permanent crescent-moon shaped scars in the contours of her skin, new batches added to already cracked life lines.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrfFPFIjyNO
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There are silent, chocked sobs that made her throat burn and her sight blur until she has ran out of tears.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkzHmMLgeqD
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And there is also horror; a burning, paralyzing sort of horror that reaches its peak and fades into a mute but perpetual tune stringing the chords of her being as she comes back and stares at the corpses of her father and mother, unrecognizable masses of ashes retching of burnt blood and bodily fluids that make a pile of vile crawl its way up to her tongue.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKm1RUKKb2t
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And then, there is he—sidestepping the man with ominous dark chakra and extending a hand towards her, onyx eyes boring into her own with the same might with which the understanding in his chakra drove her horror away.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyrQmiQRVbo
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You staying here will amount to nothing, but you leaving just might, he says. Come, Karin, he calls.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgfgbYxfYtz
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She takes his hand, and there is hope.
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“—It is said that one too many women in our family have found their fate in the lands of Konohagakure.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82QkD6py0H
“Their… fate?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlaD4g3ZQfV
Her voice curls up around the edges, as if it were a spell.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkf4y0iOhXM
“You will understand in—”
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At fifteen, Karin has shed her skin.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxnC2dvlQc6
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There are now sharp edges where there used to be soft contours; angry frowns where there used to be kindness, smirks where there used to be smiles; buoyancy where there once was shame, barriers in what once were vast landscapes—and there are also scars.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqSNBlH1N1a
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Tell-tale scars of the Karin she used to be and new, revolting ones from the Karin she has become. She hides the latter and denies the former; pretends they’re long gone, never aching, never hurting anymore.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNDjogo9gL
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Yet, he sees them all. As if she wore them on her sleeve.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjI62Tr32F9
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“Say, Sasuke, since we’re alone how about we—”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUxJK3i3w28
“I have to leave soon, Karin.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn2OXnShI8f
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She puts her glasses back on and crosses her arms with a frown, moving away from him. “Why did you even bother coming, then?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgc1TddXtIu
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Sasuke says nothing, then. He says nothing, and Karin straightens, her back suddenly assaulted by gooseflesh; could he—?530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwwHgx2JJtU
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Could he have possibly known? Known how before his unexpected arrival, Karin had been hounded by her memories. Seeing familiar faces in the nameless prisoners of the base, ghosts come back to haunt her and pull her down with them to the depths of hell—a hell made of nothing but flames and guilt of mistakes she is not sure she would take back, even if she could.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5d5ngouShm
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“…I had business here, is all.” His voice reaches out to her through the haze of her thoughts, pulling her back with nonchalant words that seemed devoid of any meaning.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7KcIT9CWFg
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But as she turns and her eyes meet his, Karin sees.
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“—in due time, Karin.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEKGW2j1yS
“Still, mama… it just isn’t fair.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1wqnzkkrn
“What isn’t, dear?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8qNA7bM0Sf
“… I wanted to spend my birthday with you and papa.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZzMi1VzXZ
Her smile—
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At sixteen, Karin falls.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHUtErEh0D9
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She falls from a great, great height at appalling speed; she hasn’t even had time to acknowledge the abysm before she has hit rock bottom, her goals and dreams spilling through her open chest and pooling on the ground alongside everything she knows.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0bgI78oES
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Alongside everything she once held dear. Everyone she relied on. The one she trusted.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBXyBSusOu
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Now, there was no one left.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUCj6X00zqF
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No one left but the roaming, empty carcass of the boy she once loved; the boy who taught her what it felt like to be alive, the boy who gave her hope and helped her find meaning back when she had lost her way, the boy who helped her to be reborn from her ashes into someone better; someone stronger, someone capable of standing up for herself and for him, too. The boy who flared her will and her drive with a single touch, with a single look, with the simplest of words—530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXw5iyBBOJk
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I need you530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtDq3GedSsj
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“So much for that,” Karin mutters to no one, her back pressed against the cold walls of a cell and her fingers absentmindedly tracing the ghost of the wound that had taken her heart out for good.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD9d05cOXVP
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And then it comes. An almost unnoticeable flicker—too subtle to be perceived, but too longed for to be ignored.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHdhRfVnTO2
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No… I’ve had enough, Sasuke but her withered heart is trying to beat again, and it makes up her mind for her.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLlnyURIEwq
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“…So much for this,” Karin murmurs to herself—and then she is on her feet again, her inner eye tracing his every move.
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—melts.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSk7BNasU6U
“Cheer up, love. There will be many birthdays left for us to celebrate together.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Jbfy4dTYg
“… You promise?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6qtrOEUnib
Her gaze softens.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNByju40uX
“I promise.”
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At seventeen, Karin kisses him.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw84pFO5OVi
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She impulsively crashes her lips against his, her arms thrown around his neck in a desperate attempt to hold onto him—to anchor him down before his essence could have the chance to fade into pitch black darkness again, to feel him before he could have the chance to waste his life—her life, their future—chasing phantoms all the way to the death.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhsDgOGM3m
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When the impromptu kiss ends, Karin sees him—the him she knows, the him she loves—flickering across his eyes for the briefest of moments, and she hears her name resounding in her ears even though he has not uttered a single sound.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGTGDjpFay
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She smiles ruefully; trembling eyes boring into his—and then wordlessly lets him go.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkABcMPP6Ta
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She has given him a reason, but the choice is his to make.
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“Ha, so it was about a boy, I knew it!”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtNg48B4W2r
“Shh, mama! I don’t want papa to hear! And… it’s not like I’m ever going to see him again, anyway….”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIu0XD2a9b
Her mother has to hide her smile, “Actually, Karin… something tells me you just might.”
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At eighteen, Sasuke kisses her back.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuphazBLzMu
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It is not nearly as passionate as her—their—first kiss had been; there is no desperation, no adrenaline—but there is craving all the same, waving through the serenity threading over her through the gentle pressure of his fingertips over the nape of her neck, enveloping her like a makeshift cloak and warming her down to her very core.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaI9DSZNvah
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And Karin feels her very essence quiver under it—under the warmth and the way her heart seemed to want to leave her and jump into him instead, to claim the home it has always longed for; the home it has always fought for.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKAgRExdiW
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The home it belonged to.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡetrsYSGoBo
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As he kisses her, sunrays clumsily dancing upon her lips, Karin feels like she would vaporize into him if Sasuke were to take a single breath.
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“How do you know?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMtXE8F1jyN
“Because, that’s how fate works, Karin.”
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At nineteen, Karin smiles.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4c1nIOS5a
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“Itachi,” she says, and Sasuke looks up to her, startled. “The name… Itachi. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4M6q56piJx
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Sasuke parts his lips—once, twice—but no sound comes out and soon enough he gives up altogether, lowering his eyes to stare at the bundle in his arms. It stares back at him, impossibly red eyes widened with innocent curiosity, pink tongue sticking out from underneath rosy lips.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2rYNUaQZM
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“Are you sure, Karin?” he whispers after what seemed like an eternity, and Karin’s smile only widens.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbMdrFs7J7D
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“Yeah.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9D0Etx2e1
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And as she sees them—as she sees Sasuke hold their baby as if he were holding the whole, wide world in the crook of his arms—Karin remembers her mother with such vivid clarity that she catches a breath of her perfume. The memory—the vision is bittersweet, and it makes Karin’s throat clog, because she recognizes that look.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIGB0JBjkmO
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It was the way her mother used to look at her father and her, eyes brimming with love and pride, unspoken but ever-present, never changing. Karin had not been able to understand it, then—530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9YENDPJHX
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But she did, now. And the understanding squeezed her heart in a way that was both, wonderful and terrible. To think it took her this long to finally understand, once and for all, what it all meant.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4FRtHX9yV
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To understand who her mother truly was, what her mother felt, what her mother desired for her—and how her mother hurt.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCdqvQK750
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You’re special, Karin. She would tell her sometimes, her eyes half-lidded and afflicted by thoughts she would never get the chance to say aloud. One day, you will realize that.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Xk9ZhCw2p
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She realized it, now; what it meant to love to her roots, what it meant to be a woman.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUnnXFMX4WO
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An Uzumaki woman.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVUDzyJ4sal
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“… Thank you, Karin.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6Z7DUV7d7
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“Idiot,” she shakes her head, weakly, traitorous tears prickling at the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill. “That... should be my line.”
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“They will be here soon,”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfCSODuBJgF
“Who will be here soon, mama?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHQzcVUixk
“It could be anyone,” she finally replies, and her hold is steady as she combs through Karin’s hair, “we have long since lost any care for their identities, Karin. What matters is… what their presence means.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEyOCwXlNSS
“And what is that?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrPq5C9TXQ9
Her silence provides the only answer; and Karin wishes it weren’t enough.
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At twenty, Karin celebrates her birthday for the first time in seven years.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxxbp7gk0d
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And it starts with a soft but firm admittance whispered as she caresses the baby’s nose, all too aware of the pleasant weight of Sasuke’s gaze, of the feelings swirling in his chakra.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksJHojhw4z
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Hearing them is unexpected, however—and her widened eyes snap to his only to find his lips beginning to curve, his own hand coming to caress her cheek in much the same way she was doing to their son.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYq82JVqEWj
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“W—what was that about?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMNPNMZhLn
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She asks; some habits are hard to break, and her awkward way of fighting down her embarrassment seemed to be as persistent as ever.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrG6raSap2e
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Sasuke doesn’t seem to mind, though. If anything, his smile seems to morph into an amused smirk as he shrugs, noncommittally. “I just felt like saying it, is all.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsVYQo43K0g
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“Dumbass,” she mutters, hoping the darkness will hide the way her cheeks have warmed up like bonfires, so reminiscent of her prepubescent days when all she could do was a dream she would one day lay with Sasuke the way she does now. “...You didn't need to.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhV9wUrBnun
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“I know, Karin,” and this time he is positively smiling, suddenly mutating back into the Sasuke that had stolen her heart so many years ago. “But it still felt good to say it.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPV2cOGUHzf
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Karin says nothing in response; simply snuggles closer to him, eyes on the baby as he opens his eyes and blinks, his little hands curling and uncurling up into the air.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ646jjJjL65
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“He is going to be strong,” Sasuke assesses, and Karin would have mocked him by how ridiculous it was that he sounds that proud of Itachi when the baby hasn’t even said his first word yet, weren’t it because she felt the same way.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmwglu2RcE
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He was going to be strong. A little piece of herself and Sasuke—a memento of those who had given their life up for them; a torch for those who had granted them the chance to live this moment.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdpGJAaSH7r
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To live this happiness.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZe1rW0i91g
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“Happy birthday, Itachi,” she whispers, and squeezes Sasuke’s hand. “I love you.”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpG9taIojG
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The words feel dusty, and unknown—but familiar.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYv4IDP7Rka
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She knew them, once.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOXzccLJSe
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She has known them all along.
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I'm sorry, Karin.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUK5oLev9V6
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Were the last words her mother told her before her father ushered her out of the house and prompted her to run—run as far as she could, away from them—and forced her to leave them to die.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdNY9MljWTv
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To survive.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAyu47Tgpen
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Those words used to hunt Karin down in those nights when sleep refused to lend her its hand, the eerie walls of Orochimaru’s hideout caving in on her and Sasuke’s steady chakra being her only relief, her only shield.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxUjf7gafK
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Yet, what haunted her weren’t the words themselves, but their meaning; Karin had instinctively known then, just as clear as she knows now, that her mother was not apologizing for forcing her to forsake them and live on.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgistylnmI
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No, that was not it—that was not the kind of woman her mother had been.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPDhr0n2b7
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Instead, she had apologized for something else entirely.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFCyg0Uonm
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For the unsaid.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP5Y4uh7j6o
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“What are you thinking about, Karin?”530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsygaYlQ7oG
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Her lips curl upward as he takes the seat by her side, repentances fading away into the evening sky.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiPqLAm0p3N
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“Nothing,” she replies, threading her fingers through his and gazing back to their children, who were laughing and running together through the backyard, a lively mixture of reds and blacks; the Uchiha and Uzumaki crests proudly etched on their backs, on their hearts.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ61g7PLCRvH
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“Nothing at all.”
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"You will be fine."530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKc3uPcQy7
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And through the tears and the pain and the loneliness and the longing and the hardships and the fear, Karin should have known better.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt1ewCvOalJ
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Her mother was always right.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSnlNwpbQgp
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end.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGcz9yel4SJ
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I... seriously don't know where all this came from; my best guess: Uzumaki feelings. Uzumaki feelings everywhere. lol, I tried to play with the different facets of Karin, and how she grows into each one of them; plus SK, of course.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnlkntwC25g
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The stuff I wrote here is not quite how I see things going, though; to do that I would have had to write about 395749574 vignettes per year, rather than only one lol so I went for rushed versions of a couple of scenarios I had thought about.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzTReGppj7g
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Oh and while I did not state it in the fic: every vignette takes place on Karin's birthday, so the baby was born on June 20, too.530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wIvk9QzqS
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Anyway, hopefully, it wasn't that terrible! ♥530Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJphOQAlg0
tags: fanfic, karin, naruto, sasukarin, sasuke
i'm : 
cheerful
listening to: never let me go - florence + the machine
ns216.73.216.176da2
