Yukari took a deep breath before entering the library. Just her luck. There were several people inside. She started walking towards the librarian’s desk but swerved towards a bookshelf. She looked behind her and saw IA, who waved at her.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXQ61jG2wB
Oh god, she waved at her.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvIRTWqJDN
Yukari just started nodding with the exaggeration of a bobblehead. After almost half a minute of this, she turned her head and focused on the bookshelf. 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkCMKOIXj4
She wasn’t looking for any book in particular, but she needed to do something to stop herself from staring at the librarian. The more she stared, the more the memory of the previous week’s fantasy would be able to crawl into her brain.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Hl5eBHJAv
After a minute of staring into space, she realised she was in the mathematics section. She scrunched up her nose. If anyone were to say that being good at something makes you like it, she would throw these hefty books at them. 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztSG4JKgGy
She looked down at the book in her hand and remembered the main character’s struggle to talk to the ghostlike woman.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡej2ENxMoan
She turned around and lurched towards IA, debating whether to walk like she usually did or in a casual, breezy way.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDWeFFTnEO
IA smirked at her. “Do you like maths?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzCGHUraxk
Yukari snorted like a horse. “Of course. I love me some numbers. Trig is seriously underrated. Yeah.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRGKoCuC5z5
IA chuckled. “Calm down.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBxakQBILz
Yukari held her head. IA eyed the book in her hand and reached for it. Yukari bit back a gasp when cold fingers brushed against her hand.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuPuq4N21s
“Did you like it?” IA asked. Yukari, still looking down, nodded. “Who was your favourite character?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQD2LZs9QzN
“Why make me choose?” Yukari replied. “Tsukino Shion is a really relatable main character, but Kanbara Sora is a lot like… hey, how did you know my name? My name’s a lot like Shion’s.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfFyezvKkxC
“It is?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAfwjnLAEj0
Yukari stepped back. She squinted her eyes at IA, who had her head tilted like a dog again.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbVcqZRzIJ7
“I’m Yuzuki Yukari. You… didn’t know?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3gWARCvGA
IA stood up and bowed. “I’m sorry for not asking for your name earlier. I keep getting…distracted whenever we talk.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCXiCDh1pP2
I keep getting distracted whenever we talk.
I keep getting distracted.
Distracted.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgP93sWXiN
838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhpZoGc5Z9E
Yukari felt like something exploded in her head, sending a blast of heat that reached from her neck up to her ears.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaSyo3KY1Uo
She coughed. “So, uh, books. Gotta love ‘em. And music… music’s pretty… dope. It’s like oxygen. Everyone needs it in their lives.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGC8tpTiCSg
She mentally kicked herself.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLNs8KS17bB
IA sat back down and typed into the computer. “Are there any good books here?” She covered her mouth. “Forget I said that,” she said with her hand still on her mouth. She took it off and sighed. “Yuka… Miss Yuzuki, do you like jazz music?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRLWRTrfm4
“I haven’t really listened to it. Why?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAilSJza2ER
“Well, you mentioned music and I remembered this lesbian romance novel about a spoiled pop star who meets a struggling jazz musician. The descriptions of the songs are really good. It’s like you can actually hear them, even though they’re just words on paper. Would you be able to come to my place again to pick it up?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoe1HbqJ2LO
IA’s eyes widened in realisation. “Oh, is it okay to recommend you new books? You’re probably sick of reading lesbian romance novels since you’ve got a boyfriend.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcyrsFdJXc4
Yukari bit her lip. “What’s my boyfriend got to do with it?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBtcU0P8oCf
IA scratched the back of her ear and looked away, frowning. “Never mind.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkT1kO7oXOU
“I’m fine with reading that sort of stuff. Recommend away.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2lBemP0s5
IA beamed at Yukari, who, under her powerful gaze, started fidgeting with the hem of her skirt.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaL8BdXdnyi
Yukari asked, “Do you like jazz?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJK3J0eQiWA
“I didn’t care much about it at first, but after reading the book, I started getting really interested in it. Isn’t it amazing how books can do that? It’s like every book is a new interest or hobby waiting to be discovered.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIaHcIiNoWB
The sky turned indigo and IA locked up the library, once again taking Yukari to her car. 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxKq6asGc3
At the apartment, IA handed her a book with two women holding hands, one kissing the cheek of the other. In one woman’s remaining hand was a microphone and for the other woman it was a trumpet.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Cw5IE2TKg
IA turned on a CD player in the room. The notes of a trombone and double bass filled the room.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWD7yHbPUsY
“Do you have anywhere to be? Would you like to read here for a bit?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSuxJPuTlcG
“What are you going to do?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwiycpb5dIq
IA picked a book from one of the piles called ‘Club Majesty’. “This will do for me.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQJZChDwcZS
Yukari sat on the one couch in the apartment, taking off a pile of books that rested on it. IA slumped into the couch, opening her own book while existing in the grey area between sitting and lying down.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPFqWBothR7
The language of the romance novel in Yukari’s hands was a bit more intricate than the previous novel IA gave Yukari but it wasn’t too difficult to read.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLnH3I91ArW
The jazz music in the background lulled Yukari into a trancelike state as she let the story envelop her. She felt like she was sleep-reading and yet she was able to take in the story as if she had the concentration of a lawyer looking for holes in a witness’ story.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcOR5AzWPWx
She was eventually broken out of her trance when IA rolled onto her back and raised her legs up against the couch’s back. IA bit her lip and stared at the book like it was written all in the most difficult of kanji characters. Yukari had to force herself to breathe, something she forgot to do as she watched her. She blushed as she stared at her lips.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡABWOHjY7LR
She chuckled as she looked at the page IA was on. “I thought a librarian would be able to read the furigana.” She almost pointed out that furigana was usually in books for kids but didn’t want to get kicked out of the apartment.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1vijgsigI
IA said nothing, turning the page. It took her only half a minute before she turned the page again. 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwLJ7HF7VC
Yukari took a closer look at the new page before IA once again turned it. It was a bizarre chase scene involving a car chasing a pig with a sack full of cash on its back. It was-838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3swBrVH55
IA turned the page. “Hey, it was just getting good,” Yukari blurted out. She held her head down. “Um… sorry.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaGAu8JdCDP
IA turned her head and lightly poked Yukari’s forehead. “Silly girl. No need to apologise. Maybe you can borrow this one from me next time.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpMzL9cxjwj
Yukari smiled. She took a few moments to gain the courage to poke IA’s foot.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCdHTdaVecN
IA kicked the air, cackling like a middle-aged woman after one too many glasses of Syrah. 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr6T1K1zfPL
She dropped her book and pounced on Yukari, tickling the underarms. This developed into a bonafide tickle match.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNYW1Bh63J
Yukari laughed so hard she snorted, which caused both women to laugh even harder. After they stopped, they stared at each other silently. IA leaned in closer.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhiNHQAwWJK
Yukari felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. A mysterious shiver swam down her body and her cheeks were as hot as newly toasted bread. She breathed in and out slowly.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3yCt6DvRgv
IA’s eyes grew before she shut them and backed away.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtuHrvOTcTU
“Um, sorry, I… uh… you should go back to… whatshisname… your boyfriend.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR10OV4dTba
Yukari stood up and bowed. She grabbed her book and gave IA one last small smile before leaving the apartment.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvzZnQKgIP
She went straight home instead of Roro’s place. There was no way she was going to read a book with that kind of cover in front of him.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAM2bS8QJW
Her phone buzzed and she frowned when she saw the message.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡabkhMjjZPo
How’re you doing, beautiful? Wanna hang out?- Roro row your boat838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DVYrXuuBV
She didn’t reply. Her fingers tingled, yearning to tell him about everything, but she put her phone back in her pocket to prevent herself from oversharing. This was her battle to fight.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKxHmOsyZg
She read the book she was lended on her bed, hiding it under the covers whenever she heard her parent’s footsteps close in on her. Her parents never opened the door.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XL2RE2LMy
The book was a lot longer than the previous one so she stayed up until 3 A.M finishing it. When she finally finished it, she started pulling at the roots of her hair.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ97D9cgLD5c
She hadn’t done any homework.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu7QLr5aYAZ
She managed to complete her homework after a few hours and went to school with bags under her eyes. Her hands shook whenever she used them and she jumped out of her skin when Roro put a hand on her shoulder.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPOBS4TE6w
“Are you okay?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHH88wOK7pb
Yukari nodded and looked away from him.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwEYcmUdh4S
Life began to form a pattern. Go to school tired, avoid Roro’s queries, return IA’s book to her, go to her place to find a new one, read it until the early hours of the morning and for god’s sake don’t let your parents know, do homework, get two hours of sleep at best, repeat the cycle. This happened for a good three weeks.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJOgGtygA9
Each time Roro kissed her during lunchtime, Yukari felt the magic a little less. She started reminiscing over the days when the two of them were friends.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7O9TVzImiX
Yukari began to notice a few things about IA. Her apartment had an unplugged microphone and a keyboard. Her fridge was covered with sketches of monsters with crowns on them, ranging from medusa to demons and all from the same artist. The magnets that held them up were souvenirs from Greece. She had a to-do list with the most basic of functions such as ‘brush your teeth, you dingus’ and ‘if you don’t eat breakfast, you will starve to death before you get to meet a cute girl’. In the latter one, a line went through the words ‘before you get to meet a cute girl’. Yukari felt as if she had been split in half, one side uplifted and the other brought down to the depths of wherever the demon in that drawing came from.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHu1sUYfNoP
After those three weeks, Roro took her aside after class and brought her to the empty music room.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKtYJDWItz
He coughed an ‘ahem’. “Now that I have your attention, I want to ask you something. What the hell is going on with you?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFz5BUu7nH
Yukari looked at the door behind her and stepped backwards but Roro grabbed her arm. His grip was gentle. 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2vc6kx0gwV
“Please… whatever’s going on, please let me know. Did I do something wrong?” Yukari gulped, saying nothing. “Please, just talk to me.” 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYd97HtCew
Yukari rubbed her eyes with her forearm. “I’m sorry. It’s not your fault.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE4MxrKQQu5
“Then is there anything I can do to help you? You’re not yourself anymore.” He said that last sentence with the face of a rabbit seeing a buzzard and his voice was hoarse, as if it was a struggle to say anything.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7q7YYjjwuA
Yukari took her arm away from her face and allowed tears to just fall down freely.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaevG9aGJ7
“It’s something I have to figure out on my own.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdikENJvuPV
“But I can-”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbdFUTCqRwn
“Not when the problem’s got to do with you!”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjIHjnFtez
“But you just said it’s not my-”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEszJFHZZbJ
“It’s my fault. If only I wasn’t so selfish.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtoH5rA7uLd
“What’s going on with y-”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VLPnZCKJQ
“I like someone else!” 838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxp9v9PNPTV
Roro let go of her and stepped backwards, his hands quivering. Yukari sat on the piano chair and held her head in her hands. Her body shook as she cried. Roro sat next to her, trying to ignore the discomfort of sitting on the corner. He held his hand in the air for a while before placing in on her head and stroking her hair.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYp83Kopf1t
“Who’s the lucky guy? Is he in our class?” His voice was slow and ponderous, as if he was trying to hold in his own tears.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSMxGeUrRTL
“It’s… a girl. You know the new librarian?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHQZT1FWSi
Roro took his hand off her hair, recoiling from shock.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFej4wn32x
“Wait, so did you… I don’t know… pretend to like me so you don’t have to admit you like girls or something?”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5grC20e4tR
Yukari shook her head, still looking down. “I liked you. Liked. Past tense. I’m…” She took a deep breath. “...bisexual. I’m really sorry. I should still like you, but… this girl’s just taken over my emotions and… I feel like there’s no room in me for any romantic feelings for anyone else.” She kept repeating the word ‘sorry’ in between sobs.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Nkj89aWnD
Roro was silent for a while. He stood up and wiped his tears away, looking down at the ground and silently wishing the floor would collapse and take him with it.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YD1PEfhhQ
“I… never pegged you for one of those girls. It doesn’t seem like the type of thing you’d be into.”838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnTmlo1qA9g
Yukari looked up and saw Roro silently leaving the room.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHujYOStga
He didn’t talk to her for the rest of the day. When she returned another book to IA and they headed to her apartment, she burst into tears in her car.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrpZJyBV7I
She told her about the breakup but didn’t explain the reason for it. IA stopped the car in a parking lane and reached over to hug her, stroking her hair much like Roro did, though this time Yukari actually noticed it and felt her cheeks heat up.838Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRAYQY03Y0
The two stayed there for a few moments, the only sounds being their breaths. It was just her and the ghostlike librarian who seemed more real with each passing day.
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