每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaqPJBBzYLq
輕嘆一聲。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWLG1i7qnEe
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8nzrnJJkFd
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy0m8rHZsJk
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51U8AEzkSj
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIj4NArhpz
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBTGD2uQEw5
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡso4mb030aV
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFPXW6YKZIy
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnqbKjhpMOu
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSu921HJlg
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFyeUrqIRU
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJn9zcWfuI7
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsp0XdORNH
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YWquWgkle
他百思不得其解。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZA16XP6Sch
再聲輕嘆。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3NcZFSy12
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlTeMVkIouU
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZvFQZLTONq
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqrCBv9H8FC
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF9PD4LQl8J
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5faftSCbu4
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIaYgepNjPm
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIXa6Ft8MNZ
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXDc5ABGYR
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8IujGu2Twi
緣起緣滅，不由自主。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ80JMZdE7Go
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd5rsE1yBy7
既要緣滅，何必緣起？409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlZte68f12t
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd7AaeLXBsf
他百思不得其解。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlcdhEKX5ho
輕嘆有三。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdFgVovnM9
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXq7eowTsBB
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Ia9URHxiP
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZbPAzbngf
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsaaoUBMZks
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlE4afkrJTK
鬱悶。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTzf9b39tIn
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXEaRMMfYkC
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkfSAWH5i3M
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjlYSRTKBGd
去抱！去奪！409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFA6EjlFMT
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx3XXiykcW5
抱甚麼？腿已不在。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFThVq59gR
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt88u1iDyUS
奪甚麼？球已不在。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLmXwlLmjEh
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡal4WMj9ARr
為何不在？為何統統不在？409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFove27WEz
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1btY2Ltkjs
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZmtIKvp7T
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuXfr9LiYLo
停下來！409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR70JblASd2
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvUvfjidV70
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopFtwEO8Dm
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡePxJsC73Vf
慢下來！409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeBiQubQMf0
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMs0Acas9fw
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrjUbbuyXZt
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFXw3mel8km
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5TsaoebsQj
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7412yKAAMF
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0WWLMCJDA
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbiNw0ufWE
昔日的他，今日的孫。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimizY3lE9o
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡePIs4th07e
永劫，輪迴。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqDby0u0JvC
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrDCFLGLoX
不敢思，不求解。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAv7CQoG7S
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAMHkxLgNE
嘆，嘆，嘆。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiPby984jno
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHIogWt4ah1
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdDaP6U7EtV
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbm5alCS9EI
他搖頭。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4DjkTjCvK
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDkXzakiYe
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFborzwbdl
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOXKNLOjS6i
