每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh9e5Y94tLF
輕嘆一聲。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1zTyCOrWS
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBfLZhVMLo
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBiq6XU42M
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLNPNoYY8s
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkEgihXVxXP
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfVeTSsAOo
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡteIarL2HcK
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCri59z9Z9b
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXL7cizMxMk
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD7KaglYhrt
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmsGIdlKBy3
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt6Gy9mX2IW
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXAxRkH9dmX
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpUkliPWXyp
他百思不得其解。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzMQrVWQXuz
再聲輕嘆。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyGuuiecqqL
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAxujeaIeDV
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtjhhE2gxoJ
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbefZsiPYNB
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFkToKpdimM
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7DyRyjLSr
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4mqNy9Wlo
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQWTvx5LgI
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF03l5KUhSm
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZASggmPF1V
緣起緣滅，不由自主。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡquO5ldYgu1
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2bMF9gi8Bx
既要緣滅，何必緣起？373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDTtyDONMJ
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYG88pN3pHE
他百思不得其解。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡieKdwUbCOW
輕嘆有三。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvinyuRfFDG
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ16JTPNYzo
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIISnf7G33
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKwX6RXZlY1
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeDZRS4hikR
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoTRzLs2B0V
鬱悶。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mqftCmutx
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbogZJ8wRXS
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGEoqSiHalO
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6gN3JccOh
去抱！去奪！373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmq9wGAJ8Up
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF3cOpR9xdl
抱甚麼？腿已不在。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsZ7W1O1eoI
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsQgpeL1Hs
奪甚麼？球已不在。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9NKbl8PDwA
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaOXk6CuFC2
為何不在？為何統統不在？373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6uHDIJLIe7
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzGkv6gKs3Z
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2vZGiFTKX9
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXJSOA6CWj5
停下來！373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjBySHcAME
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0Gw4Xc37m
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGq4nHVANqY
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYrH3EeGx3B
慢下來！373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM4QwSKPuf7
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUBO4BlDqkQ
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuf7SSyQf15
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XUrukdGwK
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeO4JqloNME
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfE5cr2amVv
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88v5xkaOUF
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiVL9JyucAB
昔日的他，今日的孫。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4wBL2Xd7S
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECIA7qmThY
永劫，輪迴。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9E5Xi5FLVx
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZhwQ3htJLC
不敢思，不求解。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXL23p0fBf3
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMatge3kDKh
嘆，嘆，嘆。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkklysuFY76
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCFY358tsM
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSkTXseIgtr
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIMZWgjNgDy
他搖頭。373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9HMvZN5iy
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOFhbSXUXBE
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPgP7dCHN8D
373Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZPzEYGKop
