每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMLLj1Tq8Fd
輕嘆一聲。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhvCbsqvr2i
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3gWynxAWl
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4616SZnKEX
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYs5NxzpJge
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwIkdsSlq1Z
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaf5k8iVXfl
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmGHFkRE1v2
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sJkqpklCe
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKdrOY83SRE
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZpN8yQbDIR
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2EHpqt5e0P
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTA7eyTJz0
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡugiGJyMdZh
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLTEsyKAnf
他百思不得其解。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgkP9cSl6i
再聲輕嘆。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeeyyrOsLKY
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4P7VRH1QXu
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrEKGtL8Zs
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6F71DaFOEB
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR14DNcwJRp
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWuJOEFt9x
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTo24Cs5sAe
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Ko6ScJxHj
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn6Ff1tD5NQ
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDi8uG9WZxq
緣起緣滅，不由自主。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10WInZUmC6
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyhaOiCVwEE
既要緣滅，何必緣起？378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzZ2RZVtMYs
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZIKAkJbo2
他百思不得其解。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWADjG35kf1
輕嘆有三。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBX22wVTGo4
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4CQuos3NLi
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvSFudn81sy
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSrA5ahUedh
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYVMFa0reE
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRyqhpwawP
鬱悶。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7bSelZA5U5
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvTSxSMEdSY
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddE9wGMbQM
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLocjrOuyng
去抱！去奪！378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbQilomBhJ
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHK2LG5vRwX
抱甚麼？腿已不在。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡekHzh9fUAM
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3MeZrYeNPi
奪甚麼？球已不在。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZs3GtF6TrA
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYF8JomprJN
為何不在？為何統統不在？378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKt7iQ1cyI
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GB3PQlraZ
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyi9ChaS93W
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPz1WxZpBE6
停下來！378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnFlJ25NCx
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyTX1NXVJmX
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJsVq2ZDOE
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBQ3g16jNL
慢下來！378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwa5BsgrwNe
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLe2O07KoMY
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTihEF0FQJ3
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqyb640JbRN
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6uaZ11ttwy
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuVKKkSW2Bh
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElDXNUHK5E
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHB5F0iXgY
昔日的他，今日的孫。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuHHTOF4i6S
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorWECc529l
永劫，輪迴。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVsv2FXmQNs
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCpc52UctlC
不敢思，不求解。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAvQa7CUvz
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBniqBVdJtw
嘆，嘆，嘆。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQBBoAsh8cM
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGYWro05qo7
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAXNLU5PkD
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1BKmX9aVm
他搖頭。378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡseGQvVtJp8
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa6bmOZdl0I
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIORoK1fzRD
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRj2KqcVUI
