Revision: Anxiety!Dark
P.O.V: First Person
(A/N: Before reading this, if you don’t know anything regarding this song, please take note that it details many aspects of depression and suicidal thoughts and behaviour. This chapter and hopefully this chapter only will contain such as well. If you are okay with this, do enjoy.)
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There was a boy I met in kindergarten
My head hurts...
He was sweet, he said that I was smart
Another visit from Dr.Panic and Nurse Anxiety.
He was good at sports and people liked him
I miss him,
And at nap time once we shared a mat
I miss the old days:
I didn't sleep I sat and watched him breathing
When we’d stay up till Dawn just fooling around,
Watched and dreamed for nearly half an hour
I miss those times,
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
But it was all a fantasy, a dream, a SICK nightmare.
Then he woke up
I dont know whether to be happy or sad that I woke up.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAPnYyxcRvxL
He pulled a scab off one time playing kick ball
Bumps and lines of dark, velvete maroon decorate my wrists like a christmas tree.
Kissed me quick then pressed it in my hand
It hurts but I dont say a word.
I took that scab and put it in a locket
I let my hair down, jagged strands and uneven chunks dangle and flow in the cold night wind.
All year long I wore it near my heart
My heart sobs with an agonizing stinging.
He didn't care if I was thin or pretty
Screaming at me to just end it.
And he was mine until we hit first grade
But I just let a tiresome sleep consume me,
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
Falling into the same nightmare again...
Then he woke up
But I cant escape reality.
740Please respect copyright.PENANALp6Avvs9c8
Last night I dreamed a horse with wings
Mascara drizzle down my eyes in hopes of a rebirth from their black and sorrowful stain.
Flew down into my home roomOn its back there he sat
I shakily toss circles and ovals in my mouth, generous amounts.
And he held out his arm740Please respect copyright.PENANAvMgvMzaORO
So we sailed above the gym
Suddenly my hands stop shaking and Im back on my feet.
Across the faculty parking lot740Please respect copyright.PENANAmCdHa0Ygcs
My kindergarten boyfriend and I740Please respect copyright.PENANAK8u5HUyuQX
And a horse with wings
My heart high on today’s ‘breakfast’.
740Please respect copyright.PENANARBaK9bXUDd
Now we're all grown up and we know better
I just want to get it all out...
Now we recognize the way things are
But...
Certain boys are just for kindergarten740Please respect copyright.PENANAQe7KPusreH
Certain girls are meant to be alone
I guess Im all alone..
But I believe any dream worth having740Please respect copyright.PENANA2c1zhWbq0x
So today's the day.740Please respect copyright.PENANAS3Wb1Cixjs
Is a dream that should not have to end740Please respect copyright.PENANAw92T1LKDYm
So I'll build a dream that I can live in740Please respect copyright.PENANAIeGBqXcqDy
I sigh heavily, holding my arms out in despair.740Please respect copyright.PENANAVEanq5fNCE
And this time I'm never waking up740Please respect copyright.PENANA5lKT65zc6b
My body swings dangerously, 740Please respect copyright.PENANATKgBkwB0KD
And we'll soar above the trees740Please respect copyright.PENANAxhbtXJPbzM
Back and forth..740Please respect copyright.PENANAGedYbtUoHN
Over cars and croquet lawns740Please respect copyright.PENANAtFjIDTxhUr
Back...and...forth...740Please respect copyright.PENANAdWgLzWVATk
Past the church and the lake740Please respect copyright.PENANAvdwtEGEx1U
And the try-county mall
Suddenly, a new found fear dissolves into my dangerously unstable mind.
We will fly through the dawn740Please respect copyright.PENANARDjBOEzqaZ
To a new kindergarten
I shake it off, tears blurring my vision;
Where nap time is centuries long
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
I let myself fall forward...
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh740Please respect copyright.PENANA0RweFopDBS
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
The thumps echo up the stairs, Soon falling in sync of the throbbing headache I have.
Ooh ooh
”NO!! DONT!” Wait—!
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