
「去哪?」408Please respect copyright.PENANAr0MQ5WYabl
408Please respect copyright.PENANAJucRwKkfh4
「急事。」408Please respect copyright.PENANApYsKnZ2K81
408Please respect copyright.PENANA5cB9tzFO6N
「你不吃晚餐?」408Please respect copyright.PENANAfYh9l7QZyE
408Please respect copyright.PENANAXe9HlhUnD6
我沒應答,逕自出門。408Please respect copyright.PENANAzWdr1h58np
408Please respect copyright.PENANAWxnz8I8Oj1
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手,不協調感令我忐忑不安。408Please respect copyright.PENANA511vbeFzYA
408Please respect copyright.PENANAQo2aZVjtXJ
難以言喻的鬱悶。408Please respect copyright.PENANAUcw2v5nyob
408Please respect copyright.PENANAJae5KbyvlS
長嘆。408Please respect copyright.PENANAYlo8bneE7M
408Please respect copyright.PENANAtFv6vnbigh
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。408Please respect copyright.PENANAxpKJCV2tI9
408Please respect copyright.PENANAaDwcB7rH0n
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品,熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按,然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉,過目即忘。408Please respect copyright.PENANA9cYl2JwKrC
408Please respect copyright.PENANAIuL9d6Nfe2
「不需要贈品?」她驀地抬眼,與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎?408Please respect copyright.PENANAVIjweybvxN
408Please respect copyright.PENANAl1dJ7Zvw7r
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口,連忙接過香菸和肉乾。408Please respect copyright.PENANAfCc7igksfN
408Please respect copyright.PENANARngpAorEz8
她假笑,沒再搭理我,拿起抹布四處抹。408Please respect copyright.PENANA7ZsokP2ACJ
408Please respect copyright.PENANAj8NTR1xDES
我走出光線充足的便利店,重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。408Please respect copyright.PENANA2lmfjzlcV4
408Please respect copyright.PENANADWJPRWN1B1
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑,另一種不安。408Please respect copyright.PENANAct9k0RVwMN
408Please respect copyright.PENANAEdGEEebIMM
櫥窗五光十色,路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序,不約而同在紅色燈號前止住,然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇,一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣,不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。408Please respect copyright.PENANAhZDFfV8xcr
408Please respect copyright.PENANAOjUXYO3R9d
心血來潮,我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。408Please respect copyright.PENANA1uhLDpC4Yt
408Please respect copyright.PENANAIVzWUX2uvG
污水,雜物,廚餘,鼠餌,坑渠。408Please respect copyright.PENANAlcdkE0xt7x
408Please respect copyright.PENANAX3jpoyGgvz
髒,亂,腐,毒,臭。408Please respect copyright.PENANA1rLsXyJrc8
408Please respect copyright.PENANAoI61uC6F2C
為何要到這種地方來?不是捷徑,不知盡頭何處,不懷目的……408Please respect copyright.PENANAEMBLMJg0KG
408Please respect copyright.PENANAdvRzDApOtH
小巷盡處是另一小巷,盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路,走又走。不停前行,像是正在找出口;絕不回頭,像是不打算找到真正出口。408Please respect copyright.PENANAXWrA2s9tCh
408Please respect copyright.PENANAzoAwUnCXJs
厭煩日常走過的路,不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去,其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇,實質一切已成定局。那是大街,這是小巷。大街在明,小巷在暗。大街繁華,小巷冷清。408Please respect copyright.PENANAjl6aODUSU0
408Please respect copyright.PENANA2Ofm9h1euh
註定的。408Please respect copyright.PENANAoI6eddMUUQ
408Please respect copyright.PENANA8KTLwJCRyE
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼?我不相信,亦不願輕言不相信。408Please respect copyright.PENANAnp5zv5oJPO
408Please respect copyright.PENANAxbIpk2QXQE
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。408Please respect copyright.PENANA7eWyqiXRZo
408Please respect copyright.PENANAVbRe4nTzZX
停步。猶疑。408Please respect copyright.PENANAs7P2X0uwDz
408Please respect copyright.PENANANEj2T8C5aF
惻隱?慈悲?然後呢?根本沒有然後,因為我自顧不暇。408Please respect copyright.PENANAjX2mfLLY6d
408Please respect copyright.PENANASbchxzzWdz
轉身。408Please respect copyright.PENANADgf9fIbdcQ
408Please respect copyright.PENANA8p7HYTgTM7
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。408Please respect copyright.PENANAxCiVd5KFAz
408Please respect copyright.PENANAbQQnjPD7wg
我回身走去。408Please respect copyright.PENANAGnqGmLmdBx
408Please respect copyright.PENANAElNFS2V7dM
惻隱?慈悲?不,好奇罷。408Please respect copyright.PENANALfXR7qiPHQ
408Please respect copyright.PENANAMT0PfVbFs3
把小狗抱入懷內。408Please respect copyright.PENANA0Sh7JA8LGE
408Please respect copyright.PENANAnvreRmoHil
「暖和沒?」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。408Please respect copyright.PENANAKVg43Lb2pW
408Please respect copyright.PENANARHj0wMzamC
陣風從後疾過,寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。408Please respect copyright.PENANAju8enPD1Id
408Please respect copyright.PENANAA4FD0VbFkY
海風?海濱公園步道?408Please respect copyright.PENANAmqrRpeIHeT
408Please respect copyright.PENANANxgEThcEGF
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答,但我需要溜達原因。408Please respect copyright.PENANA8YFO5ZE0rg
408Please respect copyright.PENANACEjBbOyoHb
多拐兩個彎,我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來,恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄,純淨,圓滿。408Please respect copyright.PENANAi1n9oB9nyB
408Please respect copyright.PENANAF5F31QR3ER
「看!這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。408Please respect copyright.PENANArlQEHDC4f7
408Please respect copyright.PENANAeegVlFaQAU
汪——牠回答,但沒有依指示抬頭。408Please respect copyright.PENANAFPYEtesXXN
408Please respect copyright.PENANAS0lWsflGEg
「找個好地方坐坐吧!」為免小狗中途跑掉,我微微拉下外套拉鏈,把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗,甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部,方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹:「乖。」408Please respect copyright.PENANA4zSr17yRDU
408Please respect copyright.PENANAgnwwKCdlro
銀月清冷,步道冷清,寧靜。心跳規律,呼吸有序,乏味。回憶很多,未知更多,迷惘。408Please respect copyright.PENANABF1IAirgE9
408Please respect copyright.PENANAyAc2fJFd9w
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller,跌了幾跤,膝蓋流血。明明怕血,明明怕痛,偏偏為保面子而強說無事,硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片,痛得要命,不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月,九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下,拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢,報答牠聽我發牢騷。408Please respect copyright.PENANAG4yFzJy1q9
408Please respect copyright.PENANARP6cDogWng
「留醫期間,我生氣朋友們不來探望我,打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後,我忙於學校課業,忘記致電他們,然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們,已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸,一吸一呼,虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了,無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過,不是說忘記就可以忘記。」408Please respect copyright.PENANAAUrgFzAeP2
408Please respect copyright.PENANAbXWvvhh1U9
記憶零碎,思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多,無奈腦袋運轉不來,沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。408Please respect copyright.PENANAsIORlj3af8
408Please respect copyright.PENANAhRQoTPARhN
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味,舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊,甚至舔到小小鼻頭。408Please respect copyright.PENANAZFZDlRg5eD
408Please respect copyright.PENANAEg3AImRyeh
我笑,笑牠傻氣可愛。408Please respect copyright.PENANA4uMbWJwqjk
408Please respect copyright.PENANAsKX21qSkAA
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。408Please respect copyright.PENANAGE1vKU1X9E
408Please respect copyright.PENANAeI7xK6xUAE
鬱悶何來?408Please respect copyright.PENANAZAnOY42eP3
408Please respect copyright.PENANAkDeWAX0L4M
學業壓力?愛情煩惱?家庭不和?408Please respect copyright.PENANA6bPpGMtpqj
408Please respect copyright.PENANACuEtZgRrub
也許統統都是,也許統統不是。408Please respect copyright.PENANAn2QbhwCRnO
408Please respect copyright.PENANALxfsE10hw3
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。408Please respect copyright.PENANAyp42jJV8yX
408Please respect copyright.PENANA9G284auYzP
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。408Please respect copyright.PENANA2e449JxGQm
408Please respect copyright.PENANAfsajbeK3PY
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。408Please respect copyright.PENANAwdngPH6MQe
408Please respect copyright.PENANAa8B8eeFblw
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼,我彈走菸屁股,將牠從懷裡抽出,來個深深擁抱。408Please respect copyright.PENANAJOKvWtPTBU
408Please respect copyright.PENANAjlUDxXNXu2
然後呢?根本沒有然後。408Please respect copyright.PENANAP91InOEYcd
408Please respect copyright.PENANAFLboMIwjn9
我輕輕放下小狗,動身邁步離開。408Please respect copyright.PENANAd12Exa2gMH
408Please respect copyright.PENANAVGrY6m2PI2
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾,自然而然不會跟上來。408Please respect copyright.PENANAejXZEMPXkE
註:此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
ns216.73.216.251da2