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「去哪？」352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz5dNdkDTd6
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU6wap19H0u
「急事。」352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cILfAKZ56
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjdNV9VeiTo
「你不吃晚餐？」352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5FUm3NMdP4
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIU395agyGX
我沒應答，逕自出門。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhV5GhTbFoZ
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtmwF300a2
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手，不協調感令我忐忑不安。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFU2Y59IQi
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwExewBIGVQ
難以言喻的鬱悶。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgq3U0w7EB
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWpsCPs89Ry
長嘆。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjo1Atjeray
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFvh99dr4P
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvYkoFmVPs
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgsTJQqhg6B
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品，熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按，然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉，過目即忘。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzsn8qQ05e6
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgyLZ6anSAD
「不需要贈品？」她驀地抬眼，與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎？352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRPSLxGgNI
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPIiQUsN5Y
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口，連忙接過香菸和肉乾。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlAFfTkS6zK
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFkMzsiTeMr
她假笑，沒再搭理我，拿起抹布四處抹。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwjiij2Epfs
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnZhpleWLP
我走出光線充足的便利店，重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0Ud0auPFN
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvf6wj6TRK
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑，另一種不安。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4z905ivxY
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡop3fMiN2Vy
櫥窗五光十色，路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序，不約而同在紅色燈號前止住，然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇，一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣，不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2MHuw0SFd7
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkl6BtQuRrP
心血來潮，我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYW64Tux43n
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5GKiTMuZr4
污水，雜物，廚餘，鼠餌，坑渠。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr35ArAHmdt
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaUkfQsQppu
髒，亂，腐，毒，臭。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHlrVdIJNu
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡno6lDnsEZT
為何要到這種地方來？不是捷徑，不知盡頭何處，不懷目的……352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0LpPBqEPFX
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHu9kC9b0V9
小巷盡處是另一小巷，盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路，走又走。不停前行，像是正在找出口；絕不回頭，像是不打算找到真正出口。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo7iPuD9Fl9
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnJiku1RSg8
厭煩日常走過的路，不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去，其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇，實質一切已成定局。那是大街，這是小巷。大街在明，小巷在暗。大街繁華，小巷冷清。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztv5iBZd39
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQLD7aom4s
註定的。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3GdIedWPZp
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbm2ebFhgv
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼？我不相信，亦不願輕言不相信。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWEhDKCbf4F
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTfSCEQkCsy
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8lLCgo9FXi
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkDKmYS7eBk
停步。猶疑。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqL0ogc2IFf
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnPhifpGre
惻隱？慈悲？然後呢？根本沒有然後，因為我自顧不暇。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo1ZWi8qhwb
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqR0v00mXSH
轉身。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyaog6cjL4e
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY8RikC1na8
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVkc7mCSD0
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8a0MuwJQkn
我回身走去。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVC4rAIwB3
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6CzRBpzu3t
惻隱？慈悲？不，好奇罷。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKPvVuLMMy
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgwFdxLSokL
把小狗抱入懷內。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV873vKTfIm
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY15Ot64xPB
「暖和沒？」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡubQhmi2kVI
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GjjmPOMxY
陣風從後疾過，寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGGHcqZ1wi
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHgJuSXz4N
海風？海濱公園步道？352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCoQs0GbTuC
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1F9BskfrS
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答，但我需要溜達原因。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOzKMIGVQpc
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFQXXrFK5Y4
多拐兩個彎，我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來，恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄，純淨，圓滿。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41aucaD9EA
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Xdw7KDX8k
「看！這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqwGsUCcgq
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeb0QS9WxMf
汪——牠回答，但沒有依指示抬頭。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxnGif1qmAn
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYuB3uDw5U8
「找個好地方坐坐吧！」為免小狗中途跑掉，我微微拉下外套拉鏈，把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗，甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部，方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹：「乖。」352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zMexdko1H
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCKXlOeBS91
銀月清冷，步道冷清，寧靜。心跳規律，呼吸有序，乏味。回憶很多，未知更多，迷惘。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkkoUSsPDb
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx6WzRqycft
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller，跌了幾跤，膝蓋流血。明明怕血，明明怕痛，偏偏為保面子而強說無事，硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片，痛得要命，不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月，九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下，拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢，報答牠聽我發牢騷。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2WnZQM5uhV
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMH2PflUPaD
「留醫期間，我生氣朋友們不來探望我，打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後，我忙於學校課業，忘記致電他們，然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們，已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸，一吸一呼，虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了，無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過，不是說忘記就可以忘記。」352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsu0X78MH2
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQbqc0szvIz
記憶零碎，思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多，無奈腦袋運轉不來，沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu7Ogke8pis
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlxZEPsHoD
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味，舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊，甚至舔到小小鼻頭。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTXQzXKnK8o
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBposkS4BgY
我笑，笑牠傻氣可愛。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9zQfZBeUx
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ7Vr2zWvNR
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZOp3vmdy9
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9Sz5cYQDr
鬱悶何來？352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6gM06ZyUc
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtaxMeDuzXL
學業壓力？愛情煩惱？家庭不和？352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHQbMGDxwm
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡueVIZtirFW
也許統統都是，也許統統不是。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9gpUkyNUj6
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82Zdc5pBtC
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa8djh8PK6D
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAirgdjKgT
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGMK8OruJ5
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpFANhH1P94
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbq5LiaQZ5
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡec5V37zMRE
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼，我彈走菸屁股，將牠從懷裡抽出，來個深深擁抱。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkz1PFxN8MH
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcmfEUtEqhM
然後呢？根本沒有然後。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPMWe9gbkM
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSoYMQEWwrd
我輕輕放下小狗，動身邁步離開。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qdzIuDwb0
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmwxuM8iKC6
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾，自然而然不會跟上來。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DE3LkPcpc
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
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