It was a VERY strong wind that day, and I absolutely swear to god that none of it was my fault. Seriously, guys. It was the WIND that knocked my umbrella into that dork's face. And his coffee fell too, rolling away. I explicitly articulated my most SINCEREST apologies and how I was just as much publicly humiliated as him.
"What is wrong with you-- I'm Gabe by the way--," he took my gloved hand to shake before returning to his nuclear meltdown. "--And what is wrong with you, coming out of nowhere, a ninja slash cat monkey assaulting my vulnerability, battering me to a pulp, leaving me struggling within in an inch of my life. I have asthma, you brute. Precious people like me die from wheezing. How dare you."
"I am MIRANDA," I shrug at Gabe. "Guess I am TOO MUCH of a woman for you."1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS60zbgprrK
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ18EY8zgGC8
With the last word, I STRUT away. A minute later, it grew apparent he won't let that happen. He ran to my side, stammering and BLUBBERING like a fool.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrxaZGLeyKy
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡix7FkcLNQh
"Now, just wait a gosh-darned second here!" Gabe raised a finger. I kept a straight face when inside I just wanted to LOL. "You still owe me coffee-- and for mangling my face-- who knows if I ever see you again."1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnSuvRXVIT
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoaV89qMIl
"I did not MANGLE your face! The wind did! Your face is not mangled, your face is perfectly FINE!" I huffed, realizing we stood outside the cafe. "I am being blackmailed and entrapped. I am not okay with it!"1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxbRL3X7JlT
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIMrzkUahR
The clouds roared back, and rain shattered. I fought with the umbrella.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQjPJrqGAu3
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTVgQJM2N8
"So it's a date!" Gabe shouted over the hysteria. 1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3ETEsyFb9
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyV9GKv7VjR
"NO. GOODBYE FOREVER." I stormed off into the storm, wrestling with the umbrella and the wind. It took until the stoplight when Gabe ran up at the moment the wind grew VERY strong again. I swear to god, it was NOT ME the first time and it was STILL not me the second time. SMACK.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEuudXWtkvw
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4yDai6u6l
The umbrella slapped Gabe ... again. I SHRIEKED in horror.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvBKKrvFF4
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTERItEfGXD
"What is wrong with you-- ," Gabe said as the pedestrian sign lit up and chased me across the splashing street. "-- I think I'm bleeding! Am I bleeding? My poor mangled face. You may rob me of my coffee and my dignity but you can't get rid of me that easy, infernal murderess. A menace to society, I say! We are all in danger!"
"Then stay FAR away from me!" 1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP3gHXyxPvO
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDEJ442IRR
Gabe took my gloved hand, and at that moment our hair rose. White lightning struck -- shocking us both. We keeled over, tased and jolted in waves until it was over. We glanced at each other with fresh and cooked eyes. Smoke steamed from our bodies. Boots were knocked from our feet. We marveled that we were electrocuted and somehow miraculously survived. I nodded, "Okay... Coffee sounds good right now..."1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95DC5gQufv
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2SQwmSUzlM
"So it's a date, Miranda," Gabe said, pleased. "That is spectacular."1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE6zcC3EWXC
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8LcURcQlS
"It is NOT a date," I insisted. "This is strictly normal and boring. People get hit by lightning all the time, Gabe."1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwv5r2bihRt
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVguJkb9ez
"And you're buying!" He pointed an accusing finger.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIzEGialSt
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWTBY9LHC3G
"No, if anything it is YOU who are buying," I bickered. 1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MDYvIN9Bd
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTk1f9abz3
"If I'm buying, ergo it's a date."1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLyEv1761bF
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmPBTwUvce8
"NOPE. WRONG. Regardless of someone buying, it is NOT--"1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkYua9HxKWG
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnuaDIATzN
We got struck by white lightning twice and wound up in the hospital, in the same room, with a curtain drawn between us. We spent hours staring at the ceiling arguing whose fault it was and how awful the coffee were here.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdWNSJkazRQ
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJxbIkTVfi
Then his voice stopped. I looked at the curtain, hearing a droning flatline. I tore the curtain back. He was off the machine, leaning in for a kiss.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMF6EoGJBW
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBrlEydiTnx
"Kiss me?" 1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1C7uXSxUY
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRKKZgWwV0
It was so OBVIOUS he was going to be my husband.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmOy57dKBV
So OBVIOUS he was going to be the father of my child.1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLDNa0wCCa
Gabe. That sweet dork. How can I not love him? 1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjt7GwwwgW7
1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPy4My9Udr
"No, you kiss me," I said. His eyes closed, as if to melt.
In our hospital gowns, we locked lips. And the rest?1133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡESgr9Pidst
The rest was, as they say, a WEIRD love story.
