“Goodbye, My King.”
Although upset, Valerian didn’t waste time and rushed out of the meeting room. If his father got his wish, then the resistance was in grave danger. He wasn’t sure if he believed the Priest when he had stated that making more stones wouldn’t take long, but he wasn’t willing to risk it. He wouldn’t allow Lidea to be caught unaware again. Not if he could prevent it.
Walking through the royal wing, he found his way to a deserted hallway. Once it had housed his father’s closest assistants. Those specialized in helping him manage the castle and who had quickly become the King’s closest aids after the death of his mother. That was until he had fired them all. Another irrational decision he had made soon after Syrion’s death.
After making sure he wasn’t followed, he entered the office that had belonged to the old treasurer. When he had still been here, the room had felt claustrophobic. The dark oak bookcases lining the walls had been filled to the brim with papers, journals, and the eventual nick knack. A gift from his wife or children, more often than not. Now there was nothing but dust.
Valerian moved to the desk that stood solemnly in the middle, and from one of its drawers, he retrieved a piece of vellum, a quiver, and some old dry ink. To his irritation, he remembered thinking last time that he would have to replace it soon. Obviously, something he had not done.
Deciding it would do for now, he spat into the ink, using the quiver to swirl it around until the tip was decently covered with the black substance. Writing with it was far from pleasant as he felt the pen scratch instead of glide over the precious paper. His normally swirling calligraphy looked more like the letter practice from a child, but the message remained the same.
Signing it with his initials, he folded it neatly before placing it in a box within the desk’s cabinet.
Putting everything away, he just stood there for a moment, staring at the now-empty desk. He wasn’t sure how often his contact within the resistance came by, but he suspected they held an eye on it at least once a week.
What if they don’t?
Valerian considered if he should send a second letter more directly. It was risky but he had done it before. The very first time he had tried to reach them, desperate for someone to save Lidea, he had given the letter to some unsavory types within the Northern Slumps, promising them a handsome payment if the resistance would contact him after. He had held his word, so in theory, he could ask them again. If it wasn’t for the neighborhood being gone now.
As he thought over his predicament, he became vaguely aware of voices. Rushing to the door he stopped himself from walking out. He would rather not try and explain why their Prince was lurking through these abandoned hallways. That raised the question, why would anyone be here? The royal wing was off-limits for those who didn’t work in it, and that scarce amount of servants and maids had enough work to do that they didn’t bother with the unused parts of it.
Intrigued, he listened carefully as the voices grew louder and he heard a distinctly feminine giggle.
“… Stop it! What if anyone sees!”
“Who will see? The spiders? I didn’t think that would bother you so much, considering last time..”
The man’s words suddenly sounded muffled as if his mouth had been covered, while the woman shrieked half laughing.
“Shut your mouth! You are far too brazen, what if a servant is new and walks the wrong hallway..?”
A couple of secret lovers seemed to be his answer. Listening to their banter, he felt a pang of longing. Unlike most of his peers in age, he hadn’t had any dalliances. His excuse had long been that as a Prince, he had an image to protect. In reality, he had never felt feelings of the sort for anyone else. Perhaps it was a good thing, as he wouldn’t find it hard to stay loyal to whoever he would be wed to, but it didn’t help him from feeling non-broken.
As they neared him, Valerian’s morose thoughts were interrupted as he couldn’t shake the feeling that he knew those voices. A good man would just let them pass by, giving them the illusion of privacy while trying his best to not listen in. However, Valerian’s curiosity got the better of him as he peeked through the keyhole.
He was shocked to see Alana standing almost in front of his door. Her arms were along the neck of a man who was just out of his view but couldn’t be her future husband, judging from the arms he had wrapped around her waist. They were distinctly light in color, while Khaleel el Bashara was naturally bronze-skinned.
Valerian had a hard time believing his goody two-shoes sister was actually unfaithful. Especially after she had been so happy with the arrangement.
“Then they would have a great show before I cut their throat. Protecting my king from being stolen from, how noble of me.”
As they stepped further into his view, he could finally see the man she had been talking to. Sir Gauthier had his arms around Alana’s lower back and their faces were only a whisper away from one another. Surprise caught him as he hadn’t expected his father’s bumbling general to be her type. Although looking at him now, the man had a distinctly different demeanor about him. He had always been traditionally handsome, tall, and lean with hair the color of molten chocolate and amber eyes. But normally he often hunched over or fidgeted nervously, whereas now he stood confidently, wearing a devilish smirk on his face.
“You don’t mean that!”
Alana playfully swatted his hand as it traveled further down her back than was considered decent.
“What? You don’t think I will hurt someone to protect you, my dear? I thought you knew me by now?”
As Valerian recovered from his disbelief, he started to become angry. Why was she throwing away her future for a man like that?
Forgetting himself, he pulled away from the keyhole and strutted out of the door. Scaring the two lovers in the process as they quickly let each other go and looked at him in shock.
“What Gauthier? Not going to accuse me of stealing from the King?”
It pleased him to see the man visibly swallow but he wasn’t able to answer before Alana cut in.
“How long were you spying on us!”
Her grey eyes looked stormy as her shock had turned to anger. If he had still been a child, then he would have quickly apologized. Of the two sisters, Alana had always been the intimidating one. Lidea might have tried to fight him when she was angry, but Alana was the one to put itching powder in your clothes and bed for weeks. Unfortunately for her, they were no longer kids.
“Long enough to be disappointed in you. Alana you are betrothed!”
“Thanks for letting me know Valerian, as if I wasn’t aware yet. Do yourself a favor and keep your big nose out of my matters!”
She rolled her eyes, causing him to frown. Since when had his older sister become this nonsensical?
“I won’t just stand by while watching you ruin your life, Alana. What will happen if your fiancé learns of this? He will reject you and then what? Do you think this low life will take you in? His family would never allow that and you know that he doesn’t have the spine to go against them.”
“As if you are one to speak on that.”
Her venomous words hurt, they held a kernel of truth after all. Still, he wasn’t about to let her chase him away.
“Alana, you are smarter than this!”
She didn’t avoid his gaze but still didn’t answer him. Glancing over to the man she had risked her life for, he had expected him to show some respite. Instead, Gauthier leaned against the wall, his smirk had returned as if he was enjoying the show. He was so different from the man he had seen at work. Was this the real him?
A bad feeling formed in his gut, and he felt even more distraught that she had chosen this man to have an affair with.
Stepping into his line of sight, her moment of silence had passed as she repeated determined.
“Just let it go, Valerian. I can take care of myself.”
Valerian didn’t respond, forgetting Gauthier for an instant as he locked eyes with Alana. Studying her face as he forced himself to calm down. It just made no sense. He knew Alana.
She had always been the sensible one. The one who was the most aware of her image and how her actions would be perceived by others. Unlike Lidea, Alana cared about what others thought of her. The idea of her doing something as stupid and impulsive as cheating just seemed so out of character. She would lose everything if anybody found out.
“Do you love him?”
He asked earnestly and the fierceness in her gaze turned to surprise as she quickly looked away. Not giving him the answer he desperately needed to understand her actions. It was the only thing that would make sense for how his rational sister had suddenly lost any ability to think.
Given her silence, he pointed his gaze back to Gauthier. The man hadn’t moved and his demeanor irked Valerian. Still, he asked him.
“And you? Do you love her?”
The man raised an eyebrow at his question and glanced at Alana before looking back at him.
“As much as she loves me. I fail to see why that matters, my Prince.”
“Of course it bloody matters! She is my older sister and I won’t let some bastard with no good intentions hurt her.”
As Valerian lost his temper, there was a flicker of surprise on Gauthier's face before he smiled more sincerely.
“If she is so important to you, then you should try to respect her decisions and trust that she knows what is best for her.”
His words were gentle but Valerian couldn’t accept them. He respected Alana, but he also knew when she was acting strangely. What was he missing?
“Alana dear, I would love to hang around for this argument, but the king expects me.”
The easy smile had returned on the general’s face as he made an excuse to escape their conversation. Turning around on his heels, he gave a halfhearted wave over his shoulder.
“I see you around, my Prince.”
Valerian didn’t even think to answer him or call him back as the man disappeared further into the corridor. Gauthier was a puzzle to work on later but he had another priority standing right in front of him. One far more important than a vulgar and strange man.
Alana was looking at the floor, avoiding his gaze completely. She looked so alone, and Valerian couldn’t stand it.
“Please help me understand you?”
Softening his tone seemed to help as she finally met his eyes once more, tears pooling in hers. Without thinking he pulled her into his arms, hugging her as her shoulders started to shake.
“Can we talk?”
She asked through her sobbing and Valerian understood what she meant. Letting her go, he pulled them back into the office he had left before. Giving them more privacy, might anyone wander where they shouldn’t be. Alana clung to him, unwilling to release him for even a moment and he grew increasingly worried. What had happened to her?
“Alana? You know that I would do anything to help.”
She paused, looking at him with tear-stained eyes full of doubt. He hated how he had caused his family to no longer trust him.
“Would you? Or would you sell the information away to your father, to save your own hide?”
He knew she had spoken defensively, and her words weren’t as pointed as she had meant them. The tearful sobbing, preventing her from raising her voice above a harsh whisper.
But that didn’t take away that they hurt Valerian.
“I won’t Alana, let me prove that to you. Now, who hurt you?”
He felt for the handkerchief in his pocket and gave it to her, which she gladly used to wipe her eyes and nose before she smiled.
“Nobody did. It is just.. I’m pregnant.”
The news took him by surprise and he stilled, not knowing how to react before he gathered his wits about him.
“But how...”
“I think you damn well know how babies come about.”
She hissed harshly, causing Valerian to redden and fumble to restore his pride.
“I.. I know.. Of course, I know. I meant.. Who is the father? Is it Gauthier?”
Alana shook her head, as she finally stopped sobbing. At least that meant that he didn’t have to go and punish his father’s general.
“Then..?”
“I haven’t laid with anyone but Khaleel.”
Her answer made him feel relieved. The child was her future husbands, and she hadn’t laid with anyone else. Alana’s situation could still be saved.
“Then isn’t this an occasion for celebration? I doubt your husband minds a wedding gift of that nature. It isn’t like he wasn’t aware of the risk when he bedded you before your marriage.”
She didn’t look happy, and he just couldn’t understand why.
“Does he mistreat you?”
“No! Khaleel is amazing.”
She was quick to respond as if she was scared to taint his good name. Seeing her reaction he wondered if perhaps the rumors of the two being lovebirds had been true.
“I thought you would be happy. You have always wanted a family.”
Alana hugged her stomach, seemingly considering how to tell him what was on her mind until she sighed.
“It is just… He has been changing. It started with him talking about the Pleberien ideals, you know the “equality above else” line.”
Her nose crinkled in disgust. It was the first time that she had shown him her true feelings about the church teachings. Though he wasn’t surprised, most people with a brain saw the flaws in such thinking.
“Then he started going there more often. He talked about learning their ways and wanted to know how he could support them further instead of just giving them money. Before I knew it, he started saying that he wanted us to stay in Lynoës and help them set up a market for which the profits would go to the faith… I know it might sound like little things, but he doesn’t talk about anything else anymore.”
She took a breath before continuing, clearly struggling to not burst into tears again.
“I can not give birth to our child here. They will take it away from me or worse!”
The problem started to dawn on him. He wondered if Milena had finally told her daughter about her gift, or if maybe Alana had noticed it on her own. She was smart after all.
“They won’t. He wouldn’t let them, and neither would I. Besides, you don’t know yet if your child inherited anything. They might be born without magic just like you and your sister.”
He had only met Khaleel once but he had noticed his devotion to Alana. Milena had chosen well for her daughter, a gentleman more interested in books than swords and with a huge love for his family. He distinctly remembered him going on and on about some family feast and how Valerian should visit to experience it. He couldn’t believe that a man like that would let his own child get hurt.
“But they might. Do I just sit around and wait until it is too late!?”
Her voice edged on hysterical as she pulled herself loose from their embrace. Pacing up and down the room she wildly flailed her arms.
“I won’t let that happen. Magic or no magic, my child must be able to live freely and without care. I don’t want it to grow up in this cursed country! How long will it be you think before they start asking the heads of anybody with magicians in their bloodline?”
Valerian let her pace, knowing that she needed to lose the energy but also because he had no retort. She was right.
“So what is your plan? Laying with Gauthier so your child might be infected with his lack of magic? How does that make sense?”
She stopped her pacing and turned to him pointing a finger to his chest.
“You don’t know Khaleel. Even if I leave, he would move heaven and earth to find me. He needs to think that I was unfaithful, that I wasn’t worth his devotion.”
If I leave..
The words stuck in his mind not able to believe what she had said.
“You are running away? Where would you go? What about your mother or your sister?”
She shrugged her shoulders as she smiled dreamingly.
“Maybe Sihaya, or Deloshra. Somewhere warm at least. And you know as well as I that Mom and Lidea will manage. They never needed me to survive.”
“That doesn’t mean that they won’t worry about you. Besides with what money are you going to live? Do you think that you can just go there and live like you always have?”
Valerian couldn’t quite hide the disbelief in his voice. What had happened to his rational sister? Her plan held more holes than many of his socks.
Alana didn’t care for his ridiculing tone and pouted her lips before smiling mischievously.
“Do you think I only talked about marriage with Khaleel? I have been helping with his work, learning in the process. I will take as much of my jewelry as I can and start a new life as a merchant woman. Before you start Valerian, I know it won’t be easy but I will not endanger my child.”
He sighed as he could hear the definite tone in her voice. She wouldn’t change her mind. No matter what he said.
“At least let me help. I can buy you a house in Deloshra. It would help you start up in a secure position.”
Alana frowned as she thought over his proposal, concern growing on her face.
“The nobles will find that out.. they will think the child is yours, Valerian.”
He smiled at her concern, endeared that she was so worried about his image.
“Let them talk. We know the truth and that is enough. I am not going to let my older sister be in danger if I can help her.”
Her eyes grew watery again and he could almost see the relief on her face. She must have been scared witless.
“Sorry, since I’m pregnant, I seem to cry at any instant.”
Pulling her back in his embrace, he cuddled her before he responded.
“At least I finally get to call you crybaby then.”
Alana snorted as she chuckled through her tears.
“Congratulations on the baby big sister, you will be a terrific mother.”
At that, she started to sob harder and he knew that she hadn’t heard those words yet from anybody, causing him to hug her tighter. He would make sure that she stayed safe. This time he would be there to help his family.
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