“Richard!” Helen exclaimed as she ran out of the captain’s quarters.
“Richard, what’s going on? What is the problem between you and Peter?”
Richard stood over by the railing, looking over it with hunched shoulders. “I’m sorry,” he said, wiping his eye once again.
Helen sighed, walking over to where he was standing. “What’s wrong, Richard? You know I only want to help.”
Richard sighed, looking over the water. “I didn’t mean anything I said to Peter. I’m sorry, I just…I get so angry sometimes, and I can’t help it. It’s something I get from…him.”
“Who?” Helen asked.
Richard looked at the sky, tears still fresh in his eyes. “My father.”
Helen nodded, understanding. She reached out and touched Richard’s shoulder, comforting him. “It’s alright, Richard. You’re getting better. I can tell.”
“No, that’s not it,” Richard said, shaking off Helen’s hand, and walking over to the bow of the ship. “You don’t understand…”
He sighed again, running his hands through his hair. “Nobody does.”
“Richard, just tell me, please.”
Richard turned to look at her, pain in his eyes. “My father hates me!” he shouted, then looked away, ashamed. “He hates me.”
“Now Richard, don’t be ridiculous, he can’t hate you. You’re his son.”
“He does!” Richard explained, “He says it’s my fault my mother died!”
“What?” Helen was confused now. Richard was saying too many things that didn’t make sense.
Richard sighed, shaking his head and massaging his temples as if he had a headache. “I was an accident.” Richard said, “I wasn’t meant to be born.”
“Richard, you’re not making any sense. Start at the beginning, please.”
He ran a hand through his hair again, blinking like he had something in his eye. For a moment they looked glazed, and Helen thought back to her father who had acted strangely during her stay at the Hilgarian capital.
Helen shook it off though, and Richard started to tell her what he was trying to say.
“My father got really drunk one night. He was at a bar and met a beautiful woman. He wasn’t married, but she was. She was married to another Bellonese soldier who didn’t really like my father.
“We suppose she came from Bellona, but she looked more Dueglesteinish, at least that’s what I’ve heard. Anyways, my dad…decided he was in love with her. And they…did some things they weren’t supposed to do.
“Pretty soon, my mother got pregnant. She told my father who hardly remembered the night, and even though he denied getting her pregnant, she said her husband would kill him if he found out.
“She covered her tracks easily enough, but fate caught up to her.
“My mother died during childbirth,” Richard finished, shaking his head again.
“Afterwards, my father didn’t know what to do with himself. She was one of the few women he ever loved, and some of his friends told me how sad he got after her death.
He also didn’t know how to raise a child. He was rich, though, and had his servants feed me, clothe me, and put me to bed. I never had a real parent in my life.” Richard wiped his eye again, his expression sad.
“And of course, my father, whenever he’d actually spend time with me, would raise me to be like him. He’d show me how the poor were filthy and useless, mistreating people in the worst ways.
I didn’t mind, though, especially since I just wanted to spend time with my father. But then he’d blame me. Constantly bringing up the fact that I looked like my mother, and telling me how she died giving birth to me.
‘If you hadn’t been born I’d still have Esther,’ he’d say, every. Single. Day. I was a failure, a disappointment to my father. And even worse, I wasn’t meant to be born.”
Helen walked up to Richard, putting a hand on his shoulder once again.
“You can’t blame yourself for your father’s mistakes, Richard. It doesn’t matter what he thinks of you. You have us, and we’ll love you no matter what.” Helen hugged him awkwardly since he was easily a foot taller than her. “Even if you can be a real pain sometimes.”
Richard laughed at that. “Glad my father taught me well then.”
The captain’s quarters door opened, and Peter tentatively walked out. “I’m sorry, Richard, I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I don’t know what I was thinking, I just…felt really annoyed.”
“It’s fine, Peter, I forgive you. And I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean anything I said and shouldn’t have hurt you like that. You guys are the closest thing I have to family right now. I don’t want to lose you too.”
Peter held his arms out for a hug, which Richard received. Helen smiled as they embraced each other, Peter awkwardly patting Richard on the back. Richard was smiling, too, glad that their quarrels were finally settled.
Things seemed like they were looking up. With Ruby no longer causing trouble, and Peter and Richard finally not fighting with each other, their family seemed to be getting back together.
Well, almost.
As the others slowly made their way out of the captain’s quarters, Luke still looked sad. Without Skylar, it seemed like their family wasn’t complete. They needed her, even if all hope seemed to be lost of finding her.
Deep in Helen’s heart, Helen knew she was out there. And she knew that they’d find her soon. Somehow, somewhere, she’d be waiting for them. And Helen felt it wouldn’t be that long until they did.
“Uh, guys,” Alice said, looking at the horizon, “I’d hate to break this up, but this is either good news or bad news.”
Helen turned to where Alice was looking, and she saw the same dark line Alice did.
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