他的語調很淡,好像在講述一件再平常不過的事情,可是……全然不是這樣的。6Please respect copyright.PENANADK7FB22FfA
6Please respect copyright.PENANATL0sv1z5As
「你,不應該放棄,而我,也不應該影響你……去捨棄正常一生。」最後他這樣說,然後就沉默了。6Please respect copyright.PENANAwS8eQMr0xN
6Please respect copyright.PENANAhO0A4zlwcz
「……」6Please respect copyright.PENANA0aK3YOOcuf
6Please respect copyright.PENANAyFxw4MqWoz
……6Please respect copyright.PENANAqdHdTgE000
6Please respect copyright.PENANA8e4LyKj2FX
愣愣的看著學長,我覺得……有點困惑。6Please respect copyright.PENANACFgS7320Lm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAm9ObBANNLi
其實他剛剛說的話,並不是像什麼驚雷一樣突然打醒一個人神智還是怎麼的,應該是說,那些我也想過了,不過是彼此角度與立場有點不同。6Please respect copyright.PENANA1dvpRXWb3e
6Please respect copyright.PENANAvKENSiolW5
突然發現──6Please respect copyright.PENANAKWPbm9SWOm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAXTyZ1ONLIt
做這些事我是為了……學長,只有極小的部分是為了自己,那時候放不下的感覺是第一次在我的思維裡出現。6Please respect copyright.PENANAHArOETIEQ5
6Please respect copyright.PENANAUaUwHHZD7x
隨著成長,我漸漸開始更接近生老病死的周遭,幾次出任務,看見那些喪失親人、愛人的痛苦臉孔漸漸烙印在心底,那時候我就開始想,有一天……6Please respect copyright.PENANATdrK7fgM6C
6Please respect copyright.PENANA0axduXe6IN
有一天這樣事我也會面對,面對親人與有人的離開──我知道我會難過。6Please respect copyright.PENANAsnGEvAhssI
6Please respect copyright.PENANAz9PzSp9P28
而最初時候,也沒也想過什麼假如自己離開了的這種事,直到遇到那位留不住他人的女子後,才不得不意識到一直被努力忽略的,我是妖師,壽命跟人類一樣,但是學長是精靈與獸王族的混血──賽塔已經活了超過兩千年的時光,外表依然年輕,曾未衰老的一切是還能再活得很久、很久的滄桑。6Please respect copyright.PENANAQy3GmwWvEa
6Please respect copyright.PENANAdxdvLMxJGm
那學長會活多久?6Please respect copyright.PENANAhcc8bb5a9k
6Please respect copyright.PENANAEVGU3cDnrX
那個曾經的劫難我們已經一起度過,預言師再也沒有為他預言任何災害,所以可以肯定,學長將會活得比想像中的還要久。6Please respect copyright.PENANA1DGZL0qEZx
6Please respect copyright.PENANAASoySHaomS
我不知道精靈與獸王族血緣在交會之後誕生的生命到底能夠存在於這世上多久,從一些對話推斷至少也是幾千年吧?但我真的不知道。6Please respect copyright.PENANAe3FP7GfmtS
6Please respect copyright.PENANAvQzZbYl0Jj
而不想知道的是,我僅有百年左右的日子,到底……在學長的一生中能算得上什麼?6Please respect copyright.PENANAtL6amNgm8H
6Please respect copyright.PENANAw5hWt3lsDl
如果他是一個不那麼專情的人、如果他可以遺忘,或許事情就不值得擔心,但是他不是。6Please respect copyright.PENANAVb0uiAWnHl
6Please respect copyright.PENANANkkxp2jAUP
雖然到接受黑山君契約之前我還一直在想,也許我不需要這麼做,甚至害怕著有一天,當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。6Please respect copyright.PENANAyLD8XXhUul
6Please respect copyright.PENANA1nJSHodjxf
到現在還是不知道學長會什麼會喜歡我,就跟我也不曉得怎麼喜歡上他的一樣,不過他,如此強大、卻總是為我著想……有太多理由我可能會被他吸引,那種心跳的感覺、血液流過的脈動總為他牽引……就是不知道他到底能看上我哪點,還居然在認識不到一年的時間中,就可以為我付出生命。6Please respect copyright.PENANAyBgYXF9nES
6Please respect copyright.PENANA3iEiBqSX7v
所以我害怕又不知道是否該害怕──當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。6Please respect copyright.PENANACURAlnCe2N
6Please respect copyright.PENANAAvUMQSysQe
因為我想不透我有什麼地方直得他付出永遠。6Please respect copyright.PENANAom6FUsnLQf
6Please respect copyright.PENANA8aGswI6qXE
只是不願意有任何可能性看見他在漫長的年歲中寂寞,就算是我欠他的,這樣一點回報,我還付得起。6Please respect copyright.PENANAuQEBSmdt8I
6Please respect copyright.PENANAwO5duPNpfD
不過以這些來說,一切都是想多了,很多事情不需要理由,連此刻也是,看他的眼神,我知道我這次選擇沒有錯誤。6Please respect copyright.PENANAx9TqB9M6Pm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAwPq0YOZ72D
……6Please respect copyright.PENANARDHsvT9XLE
6Please respect copyright.PENANA2756jI1E1l
唯一從沒有想過的是學長的想法。6Please respect copyright.PENANAVSS1cIQw2d
6Please respect copyright.PENANA7icSqcaO59
如果我能改變自己的命運,如果我能找到方法留下來,學長怎麼可能不知道、辦不到。6Please respect copyright.PENANAzlXnYiULq2
6Please respect copyright.PENANAD4monDXkiD
根本就是他不想。6Please respect copyright.PENANAnwrvjtXDdF
6Please respect copyright.PENANAf9WLIK6oic
說不想好像也不太對,應該是說,他放棄了。6Please respect copyright.PENANAQgzQm80DTJ
6Please respect copyright.PENANAkCbgr8aOya
我從沒想過學長也會擔心這些,在他說出來那不長的卻難得的一段話中,我可以捕捉到這些念頭,他早想過了。6Please respect copyright.PENANADTeGbFBpfI
6Please respect copyright.PENANAolyKEiWsDD
但是比起我害怕看見親人離去,他寧願選擇放手。6Please respect copyright.PENANAjL78g3PHQR
6Please respect copyright.PENANAoXdLIxJfLN
但是比起我擔心他將不在乎我,他只是想著怎樣對我才是最好。6Please respect copyright.PENANAJdgCT6P7t3
6Please respect copyright.PENANARSYaK6Ov8X
到頭來,他還是處處為我著想,我不會去說什麼我直不直得他付出這種話,可是……這樣真的好嗎?6Please respect copyright.PENANAiFBfXEyuLN
6Please respect copyright.PENANARozcMv5eIY
是不是應該也有什麼事是指有我才能為學長做的,而不是一味讓我接受他的幫助、他的掛心、他……隱晦的愛情?6Please respect copyright.PENANAMUhQeU0EIm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAbHYXnh0b2h
真的會有嗎?6Please respect copyright.PENANA1Ol5ztVMxR
6Please respect copyright.PENANAB3kst11yS7
「學長……」慢慢的,我小心翼翼的把手搭上學長肩膀,勾著那銀亮髮絲與中間垂下的一縷血色。6Please respect copyright.PENANAoIplYJ2aCP
6Please respect copyright.PENANAUgpXM7EfZX
「嗯?」他的眼神,大概是不太明白我會想說什麼的樣子。6Please respect copyright.PENANAwSAdvudhTt
6Please respect copyright.PENANAqyOVIcBM1M
這時我知道,有的,一定有什麼是我能為他做的。6Please respect copyright.PENANAlAQRWL5IUB
6Please respect copyright.PENANAZxz0oED1yy
不再需要質疑──他真的需要我,而我也需要他……6Please respect copyright.PENANA1poinnLiUo
6Please respect copyright.PENANAmndqjiWJgg
「那個啊……」忍不住又騰出一隻手刮了一下臉,「既然你這麼想,也這麼決定了,那……為什麼還去找那個盒精?聽說那東西,並不好拿。」6Please respect copyright.PENANAbYa6h3AT5E
6Please respect copyright.PENANAQIEJ1dwqVu
事實上根本並不是不好拿,而是幾乎不可能拿得到,也不會是一念之間,想去拿就可以順利拿到的東西。6Please respect copyright.PENANAe7ZcDzYzJX
6Please respect copyright.PENANAlB8KeJUhAQ
白川主我原本裝黑石的抽屜裡,特別留下了關於缺憾盒精的一些事。6Please respect copyright.PENANAmoqVOriZ7e
6Please respect copyright.PENANArubTUTWj96
「……」聽到這問話,學長有一瞬間得錯愕也有一瞬間的明瞭。6Please respect copyright.PENANAEywfQypicz
6Please respect copyright.PENANAKlMXEzMmT2
「為什麼?」我毫不放棄的再問一次。6Please respect copyright.PENANAz2z9XMS7kC
6Please respect copyright.PENANA0xUwC5BD05
「因為……」難得猶豫,在某些時候是顯示一個人的絕對在乎,「我沒有辦法完全放棄。」6Please respect copyright.PENANAdoGkU4zdak
6Please respect copyright.PENANALU4c4qOori
在聽見這句話的時候,我的心跳聲一瞬間變得很鼓譟,像是要脫離胸膛這樣跳出去一般激烈異常,不過慢慢就平復下來了。6Please respect copyright.PENANA8nk6IyU0Qq
6Please respect copyright.PENANAkuk4FFoQS7
然後深深吸了一口氣,我用力眨幾下眼睛之後,撐起身體、對準──6Please respect copyright.PENANAcrGrI4qYbZ
6Please respect copyright.PENANAdahzmQ5lCU
在學長出乎意料的表情中用力親上去!6Please respect copyright.PENANA3OrBkAsof8
6Please respect copyright.PENANAhB6KCi0yh1
只差沒有直接用撞的了,兩個想太多的人,確實需要狠狠敲一下,之前是我,現在是學長!6Please respect copyright.PENANACnaqYtJpMF
6Please respect copyright.PENANAn78yQpJw0i
「因為你需要我,而我也需要你,這就是我自願留下來、也讓你留下來的理由。」6Please respect copyright.PENANA3bxdBmh65x
6Please respect copyright.PENANAnPaqpiBeQq
幾秒之後我就放開搭著學長的手了,非常認真看著他這樣說。6Please respect copyright.PENANAI5Pt5RmtXp
6Please respect copyright.PENANASxcm78QE9c
6Please respect copyright.PENANAXocWvi9QbE
6Please respect copyright.PENANAHQ8q3padg0
ns216.73.216.192da2 6Please respect copyright.PENANATL0sv1z5As
「你,不應該放棄,而我,也不應該影響你……去捨棄正常一生。」最後他這樣說,然後就沉默了。6Please respect copyright.PENANAwS8eQMr0xN
6Please respect copyright.PENANAhO0A4zlwcz
「……」6Please respect copyright.PENANA0aK3YOOcuf
6Please respect copyright.PENANAyFxw4MqWoz
……6Please respect copyright.PENANAqdHdTgE000
6Please respect copyright.PENANA8e4LyKj2FX
愣愣的看著學長,我覺得……有點困惑。6Please respect copyright.PENANACFgS7320Lm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAm9ObBANNLi
其實他剛剛說的話,並不是像什麼驚雷一樣突然打醒一個人神智還是怎麼的,應該是說,那些我也想過了,不過是彼此角度與立場有點不同。6Please respect copyright.PENANA1dvpRXWb3e
6Please respect copyright.PENANAvKENSiolW5
突然發現──6Please respect copyright.PENANAKWPbm9SWOm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAXTyZ1ONLIt
做這些事我是為了……學長,只有極小的部分是為了自己,那時候放不下的感覺是第一次在我的思維裡出現。6Please respect copyright.PENANAHArOETIEQ5
6Please respect copyright.PENANAUaUwHHZD7x
隨著成長,我漸漸開始更接近生老病死的周遭,幾次出任務,看見那些喪失親人、愛人的痛苦臉孔漸漸烙印在心底,那時候我就開始想,有一天……6Please respect copyright.PENANATdrK7fgM6C
6Please respect copyright.PENANA0axduXe6IN
有一天這樣事我也會面對,面對親人與有人的離開──我知道我會難過。6Please respect copyright.PENANAsnGEvAhssI
6Please respect copyright.PENANAz9PzSp9P28
而最初時候,也沒也想過什麼假如自己離開了的這種事,直到遇到那位留不住他人的女子後,才不得不意識到一直被努力忽略的,我是妖師,壽命跟人類一樣,但是學長是精靈與獸王族的混血──賽塔已經活了超過兩千年的時光,外表依然年輕,曾未衰老的一切是還能再活得很久、很久的滄桑。6Please respect copyright.PENANAQy3GmwWvEa
6Please respect copyright.PENANAdxdvLMxJGm
那學長會活多久?6Please respect copyright.PENANAhcc8bb5a9k
6Please respect copyright.PENANAEVGU3cDnrX
那個曾經的劫難我們已經一起度過,預言師再也沒有為他預言任何災害,所以可以肯定,學長將會活得比想像中的還要久。6Please respect copyright.PENANA1DGZL0qEZx
6Please respect copyright.PENANAASoySHaomS
我不知道精靈與獸王族血緣在交會之後誕生的生命到底能夠存在於這世上多久,從一些對話推斷至少也是幾千年吧?但我真的不知道。6Please respect copyright.PENANAe3FP7GfmtS
6Please respect copyright.PENANAvQzZbYl0Jj
而不想知道的是,我僅有百年左右的日子,到底……在學長的一生中能算得上什麼?6Please respect copyright.PENANAtL6amNgm8H
6Please respect copyright.PENANAw5hWt3lsDl
如果他是一個不那麼專情的人、如果他可以遺忘,或許事情就不值得擔心,但是他不是。6Please respect copyright.PENANAVb0uiAWnHl
6Please respect copyright.PENANANkkxp2jAUP
雖然到接受黑山君契約之前我還一直在想,也許我不需要這麼做,甚至害怕著有一天,當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。6Please respect copyright.PENANAyLD8XXhUul
6Please respect copyright.PENANA1nJSHodjxf
到現在還是不知道學長會什麼會喜歡我,就跟我也不曉得怎麼喜歡上他的一樣,不過他,如此強大、卻總是為我著想……有太多理由我可能會被他吸引,那種心跳的感覺、血液流過的脈動總為他牽引……就是不知道他到底能看上我哪點,還居然在認識不到一年的時間中,就可以為我付出生命。6Please respect copyright.PENANAyBgYXF9nES
6Please respect copyright.PENANA3iEiBqSX7v
所以我害怕又不知道是否該害怕──當我真的可以和他活得一樣久,就有一天,他不再在乎我。6Please respect copyright.PENANACURAlnCe2N
6Please respect copyright.PENANAAvUMQSysQe
因為我想不透我有什麼地方直得他付出永遠。6Please respect copyright.PENANAom6FUsnLQf
6Please respect copyright.PENANA8aGswI6qXE
只是不願意有任何可能性看見他在漫長的年歲中寂寞,就算是我欠他的,這樣一點回報,我還付得起。6Please respect copyright.PENANAuQEBSmdt8I
6Please respect copyright.PENANAwO5duPNpfD
不過以這些來說,一切都是想多了,很多事情不需要理由,連此刻也是,看他的眼神,我知道我這次選擇沒有錯誤。6Please respect copyright.PENANAx9TqB9M6Pm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAwPq0YOZ72D
……6Please respect copyright.PENANARDHsvT9XLE
6Please respect copyright.PENANA2756jI1E1l
唯一從沒有想過的是學長的想法。6Please respect copyright.PENANAVSS1cIQw2d
6Please respect copyright.PENANA7icSqcaO59
如果我能改變自己的命運,如果我能找到方法留下來,學長怎麼可能不知道、辦不到。6Please respect copyright.PENANAzlXnYiULq2
6Please respect copyright.PENANAD4monDXkiD
根本就是他不想。6Please respect copyright.PENANAnwrvjtXDdF
6Please respect copyright.PENANAf9WLIK6oic
說不想好像也不太對,應該是說,他放棄了。6Please respect copyright.PENANAQgzQm80DTJ
6Please respect copyright.PENANAkCbgr8aOya
我從沒想過學長也會擔心這些,在他說出來那不長的卻難得的一段話中,我可以捕捉到這些念頭,他早想過了。6Please respect copyright.PENANADTeGbFBpfI
6Please respect copyright.PENANAolyKEiWsDD
但是比起我害怕看見親人離去,他寧願選擇放手。6Please respect copyright.PENANAjL78g3PHQR
6Please respect copyright.PENANAoXdLIxJfLN
但是比起我擔心他將不在乎我,他只是想著怎樣對我才是最好。6Please respect copyright.PENANAJdgCT6P7t3
6Please respect copyright.PENANARSYaK6Ov8X
到頭來,他還是處處為我著想,我不會去說什麼我直不直得他付出這種話,可是……這樣真的好嗎?6Please respect copyright.PENANAiFBfXEyuLN
6Please respect copyright.PENANARozcMv5eIY
是不是應該也有什麼事是指有我才能為學長做的,而不是一味讓我接受他的幫助、他的掛心、他……隱晦的愛情?6Please respect copyright.PENANAMUhQeU0EIm
6Please respect copyright.PENANAbHYXnh0b2h
真的會有嗎?6Please respect copyright.PENANA1Ol5ztVMxR
6Please respect copyright.PENANAB3kst11yS7
「學長……」慢慢的,我小心翼翼的把手搭上學長肩膀,勾著那銀亮髮絲與中間垂下的一縷血色。6Please respect copyright.PENANAoIplYJ2aCP
6Please respect copyright.PENANAUgpXM7EfZX
「嗯?」他的眼神,大概是不太明白我會想說什麼的樣子。6Please respect copyright.PENANAwSAdvudhTt
6Please respect copyright.PENANAqyOVIcBM1M
這時我知道,有的,一定有什麼是我能為他做的。6Please respect copyright.PENANAlAQRWL5IUB
6Please respect copyright.PENANAZxz0oED1yy
不再需要質疑──他真的需要我,而我也需要他……6Please respect copyright.PENANA1poinnLiUo
6Please respect copyright.PENANAmndqjiWJgg
「那個啊……」忍不住又騰出一隻手刮了一下臉,「既然你這麼想,也這麼決定了,那……為什麼還去找那個盒精?聽說那東西,並不好拿。」6Please respect copyright.PENANAbYa6h3AT5E
6Please respect copyright.PENANAQIEJ1dwqVu
事實上根本並不是不好拿,而是幾乎不可能拿得到,也不會是一念之間,想去拿就可以順利拿到的東西。6Please respect copyright.PENANAe7ZcDzYzJX
6Please respect copyright.PENANAlB8KeJUhAQ
白川主我原本裝黑石的抽屜裡,特別留下了關於缺憾盒精的一些事。6Please respect copyright.PENANAmoqVOriZ7e
6Please respect copyright.PENANArubTUTWj96
「……」聽到這問話,學長有一瞬間得錯愕也有一瞬間的明瞭。6Please respect copyright.PENANAEywfQypicz
6Please respect copyright.PENANAKlMXEzMmT2
「為什麼?」我毫不放棄的再問一次。6Please respect copyright.PENANAz2z9XMS7kC
6Please respect copyright.PENANA0xUwC5BD05
「因為……」難得猶豫,在某些時候是顯示一個人的絕對在乎,「我沒有辦法完全放棄。」6Please respect copyright.PENANAdoGkU4zdak
6Please respect copyright.PENANALU4c4qOori
在聽見這句話的時候,我的心跳聲一瞬間變得很鼓譟,像是要脫離胸膛這樣跳出去一般激烈異常,不過慢慢就平復下來了。6Please respect copyright.PENANA8nk6IyU0Qq
6Please respect copyright.PENANAkuk4FFoQS7
然後深深吸了一口氣,我用力眨幾下眼睛之後,撐起身體、對準──6Please respect copyright.PENANAcrGrI4qYbZ
6Please respect copyright.PENANAdahzmQ5lCU
在學長出乎意料的表情中用力親上去!6Please respect copyright.PENANA3OrBkAsof8
6Please respect copyright.PENANAhB6KCi0yh1
只差沒有直接用撞的了,兩個想太多的人,確實需要狠狠敲一下,之前是我,現在是學長!6Please respect copyright.PENANACnaqYtJpMF
6Please respect copyright.PENANAn78yQpJw0i
「因為你需要我,而我也需要你,這就是我自願留下來、也讓你留下來的理由。」6Please respect copyright.PENANA3bxdBmh65x
6Please respect copyright.PENANAnPaqpiBeQq
幾秒之後我就放開搭著學長的手了,非常認真看著他這樣說。6Please respect copyright.PENANAI5Pt5RmtXp
6Please respect copyright.PENANASxcm78QE9c
6Please respect copyright.PENANAXocWvi9QbE
6Please respect copyright.PENANAHQ8q3padg0