x
No Plagiarism!tH2PtK8XiU7C6MBI2jilposted on PENANA (本節推薦搭配歌曲為美波 - ライラック)8964 copyright protection230PENANAMMWmO6mcDf 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA9X5ZnkevHf
8964 copyright protection230PENANAPGzNtrMxZj 維尼
(8964 copyright protection230PENANArl0KxOBMec 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA0vj5Y2B1DZ
8964 copyright protection230PENANA99fmMykG5m 維尼
------老爸視角------8964 copyright protection230PENANADjhxvYn9NJ 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAEhgDjd9vKI
8964 copyright protection230PENANArjIENlYQbI 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANARN7K0lOteh
8964 copyright protection230PENANAG6LHmFjHi0 維尼
晚上實況結束後,我便直接洗洗睡了。醒來時已經是早上九點。8964 copyright protection230PENANAVBJPnhDzai 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAgZYuitqTDB
8964 copyright protection230PENANASvlKL9XWtC 維尼
似乎夢到了什麼不好的事,一醒來卻通通忘了。只有殘留的些許緊張及冷汗,在告知自己有這件事。8964 copyright protection230PENANAUucLQVFgov 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANATBXWZsQt5H
8964 copyright protection230PENANAz754LhNQab 維尼
但既然忘了……就別逼自己回想了吧?8964 copyright protection230PENANAkO89Z5Wrfh 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAV7zfwh0Lci
8964 copyright protection230PENANA21m07LDe3w 維尼
總之,我仍舊直接起身到廁所梳洗。8964 copyright protection230PENANAKMkqBKB8YY 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA4pM2ZL7v9G
8964 copyright protection230PENANAbcFpo7e5VG 維尼
感覺睡得不太好,有種過度警醒,卻依舊疲憊的感受在體內盤桓不去。就算刷牙洗臉完,也試著做了對現代人來說十分難得的早操,那感覺仍無消退的打算。8964 copyright protection230PENANAUZCZzxkX7P 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAvtYJjFrNLT
8964 copyright protection230PENANATcayrc0Tez 維尼
是肚子餓的關係嗎……?這麼想著的我直接去廚房煮了碗泡麵,接著坐到客廳沙發,像是心死的上班族般默默吃完再回廚房洗碗。8964 copyright protection230PENANAFLXnHNGzCU 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA1BEu5ZpuA4
8964 copyright protection230PENANAiOE59edcEB 維尼
洗完後回到房間,用手機傳訊息給北風說:昨天自己問太多了,並對拿問題堵她問題這點覺得抱歉,並且還在想賠罪的方式。一送完訊息,我便閉上眼睛拋開手機,在沙發上伸手摀住臉。8964 copyright protection230PENANAHVgLHZp1tI 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAVBfVqsGWZY
8964 copyright protection230PENANATrKrO7LYVP 維尼
「……嚇哈!」8964 copyright protection230PENANAqOKYqWDyR9 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAdEgafTDJ8e
8964 copyright protection230PENANAwu2oQ2nv3u 維尼
發出了十分羞恥(被別人聽到的話),但能幫自己打氣的仿武士吆喝。8964 copyright protection230PENANAUz5Lpi0QHa 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA3Yiz3PDCgF
8964 copyright protection230PENANAH0S0FE7fqG 維尼
好了。8964 copyright protection230PENANAypz0eCKGN5 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAUDnG33kHfK
8964 copyright protection230PENANASiUR1A7xdF 維尼
能先做的事都做完了,該是做那個練習的時候了。8964 copyright protection230PENANAjHA0wJtWUb 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANARPA8Ymk096
8964 copyright protection230PENANAVmO33QB28y 維尼
……做那件我下定決心做到的事。8964 copyright protection230PENANArhPtuyjx5Q 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAWebQmpIXwL
8964 copyright protection230PENANAbOx20aHWZT 維尼
於是我深呼吸。接連深呼吸三次,才終於讓自己抓起家中鑰匙離開房間。8964 copyright protection230PENANAcRaUV4bXYq 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANALrfW6WSG6T
8964 copyright protection230PENANA9Sr0qqq2xK 維尼
老實說──上次雖然成功走到陽台,但僅僅一次的成功經驗,無法讓恐懼就此消散。對於踏出家門這種事,還是會忍不住想要逃避。8964 copyright protection230PENANAogyK3G4q9y 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAX9O7CbMPEc
8964 copyright protection230PENANAemtGIOU4Oc 維尼
很想做點事。無論什麼事都好,藉此讓自己不用面對那可怕的感受。8964 copyright protection230PENANAaKZ2E55n4V 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANADtSSeXWZA2
8964 copyright protection230PENANAawGr6AZvWz 維尼
就算曾經挑戰成功,但有時……這反而會讓自己不願再次嘗試。8964 copyright protection230PENANAyltBBtPDmx 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANANfkGkxmPDZ
8964 copyright protection230PENANA0BdIJwwuyZ 維尼
比起失敗後又失敗,一度成功後卻再度失敗的挫折會讓人更難受。8964 copyright protection230PENANA6a6bKQiU4j 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAC6TOjikOoy
8964 copyright protection230PENANAvAT8CxlFPF 維尼
所以說,看見希望不一定是好事。因為有些人──像是我──就會覺得希望保留在還是「希望」的狀態就好。畢竟一旦開始追逐,那希望可能反而會破滅,轉變成更深的絕望。8964 copyright protection230PENANAIQB5lHp3SS 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAvdDFVM6dxl
8964 copyright protection230PENANAnHeu2XeMuL 維尼
「……唉。」8964 copyright protection230PENANAFYpnfB5SUr 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAyuJafXRLbh
8964 copyright protection230PENANAf8PPWEM4ey 維尼
但無論再想逃避,還是得繼續嘗試。8964 copyright protection230PENANA6JC6HjSHmg 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANACmetpnVphV
8964 copyright protection230PENANAKbcBXJI9Mq 維尼
既然決定了。那麼為了自己──同時也是為了兩個孩子,無論如何都得繼續去試。8964 copyright protection230PENANA4kBhmTdPHb 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAprDsJkvP3Q
8964 copyright protection230PENANAUWeznlBQAT 維尼
「嘶──呼──嘶──呼──」8964 copyright protection230PENANAbSQqAIWS6m 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAEsleycoM0x
8964 copyright protection230PENANA97KvTdf7Eg 維尼
終於準備好後,我站在門口,再度深呼吸三次,試著完全放空。盡量不去想接下來要做的事,也不去想做不到的話會怎樣?8964 copyright protection230PENANAc90ZFoki94 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAm0yerh3YEi
8964 copyright protection230PENANAbUQVVm1xFR 維尼
不去想那些會產生恐懼的事。8964 copyright protection230PENANAy8J4Cm1Jo5 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA39jpAgIpeT
8964 copyright protection230PENANAeNV0u3v5fC 維尼
似乎是因為原有的疲憊吧?感覺比較沒胡思亂想了。於是接下來,我小心維持著腦內的平衡,同時伸手抓住門把。8964 copyright protection230PENANABmlPSHTpRG 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANApN6NSpmmV6
8964 copyright protection230PENANA535mUU4SJU 維尼
不會有事的……這就只是門把,不會怎樣的。接著再向右推,然後再走出去就好。8964 copyright protection230PENANAkacbR7vciT 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAbpjhjnKcuG
8964 copyright protection230PENANAeiHqtNhiUS 維尼
閉上眼,只去想著門把的觸感……推開時的阻力還有抬腳向前時的肌肉感受──8964 copyright protection230PENANA99LBY9tRTA 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA9KXIqjIPbb
8964 copyright protection230PENANAR3i3g8bTLP 維尼
努力讓自己集中在這些事上,不多想什麼有的沒的。結果一睜眼──便發現自己已然站在陽台。8964 copyright protection230PENANAcHP30iW2np 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAwKjuHpu2UI
8964 copyright protection230PENANAZIBbH4Q4M2 維尼
「呼……」稍微鬆了口氣。「看吧,就說不會怎麼樣了。」8964 copyright protection230PENANAcoXlfXQcok 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAZmUDVfzGYJ
8964 copyright protection230PENANAZM8BQja2jx 維尼
然而,雖已過了第一關,但和上次相比根本沒任何不同。8964 copyright protection230PENANAPvl1qdYkxn 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA8rsqGXaWFi
8964 copyright protection230PENANAOF4wY3iVmc 維尼
但還是得鼓勵自己就是了。8964 copyright protection230PENANAIEjIf70Tag 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAinY6UQjJ33
8964 copyright protection230PENANAwXpJELI0iG 維尼
稍微從陽台向外看去──恩,沒什麼特別的。是在客廳也看得見,對面公寓的水泥牆及別人客廳的──不行。再看下去大概會被當成偷窺狂。8964 copyright protection230PENANAGduQmpgsw9 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAGqWHXFFWxi
8964 copyright protection230PENANAe7g02DdNGe 維尼
而向左看去,便是這個社區的公園。是我……和子曦在若芸與輝烈還小時,常帶他們去玩的地方。8964 copyright protection230PENANAkAdKQpQqjW 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAqLfQrxl9xc
8964 copyright protection230PENANAGk2ZIpuEVR 維尼
有點懷念。8964 copyright protection230PENANAuXdTrclbF6 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAJZtPf1XJbB
8964 copyright protection230PENANAR9kRr5Syen 維尼
想到以前的事,即便現在也還是忍不住想笑。8964 copyright protection230PENANAPCb2AgTy0l 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAP02Dfuqz7T
8964 copyright protection230PENANAWh9kcDhKe8 維尼
那是一切都還正常,只屬於我們家的時光。8964 copyright protection230PENANAHtNOryGAZh 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAWjmhrHsnhm
8964 copyright protection230PENANAhlyg4xTAEm 維尼
子曦會一直在我身邊,若芸與輝烈也還小,整天黏著在家的我和她不放──8964 copyright protection230PENANA6fAJ02Z1CV 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA09Zh6TN0W9
8964 copyright protection230PENANAxnb1JgmAgB 維尼
但如今卻完全相反。8964 copyright protection230PENANAtPOiFnEgYZ 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA1udolSDlmX
8964 copyright protection230PENANAJl3dMsKCfl 維尼
……一不小心又分心太久,還是把心思放回正事吧。8964 copyright protection230PENANAS2yCTv8axL 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAz6R4HMU33Z
8964 copyright protection230PENANAfCfS02JvOF 維尼
把目標放在右手邊──那扇門的背後。8964 copyright protection230PENANABzYpBr7Eix 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAuAgcLxTbiF
8964 copyright protection230PENANATD5DahLJxQ 維尼
好吧。8964 copyright protection230PENANAUUufT0oq05 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAeG5ro1FQo3
8964 copyright protection230PENANAtfWsTlzd8w 維尼
總而言之,我試著強迫自己向右轉,面對自己的家門。但直到扶住陽台欄桿,一點一滴用手扯動自己前,雙腿都不肯聽從使喚。8964 copyright protection230PENANAcBbzVOJbCF 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAdxKC17qCSY
8964 copyright protection230PENANApAodQAM0Fb 維尼
腦袋不斷發出警訊,警告自己別去碰……別看見那些事物。可是那就只是扇門,只要打開就能出去了,不就是這麼簡單而已?8964 copyright protection230PENANAzhfwN6RdNR 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANA60C9lhqeK3
8964 copyright protection230PENANATPIbjLfEuB 維尼
如果辦得到的話就試試啊?「這到底有什麼辦不到的?」8964 copyright protection230PENANAujbS0oCVBv 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAYmeKw12z79
8964 copyright protection230PENANAHkMdCVHUn2 維尼
如果不怕的話大可以打開那扇門啊?「......好啊。我就開給你看!」8964 copyright protection230PENANAVAU61QjGED 維尼
234Please respect copyright.PENANAMUfHcR8cFd
8964 copyright protection230PENANADNWs6hmIIj 維尼
只要像這樣伸手,握住大門握把再推開就──8964 copyright protection230PENANAly6mTZbwdM 維尼
216.73.216.176
ns216.73.216.176da2