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The sun hit my face before I was ready for the day to begin.
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I reached out instinctively, half-asleep, expecting to feel Maddox beside me. His warmth. The soft rhythm of his chest rising and falling. Maybe even his raspy voice murmuring something sarcastic, like he always did when I slept past noon.
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But there was nothing.
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Just a cold pillow.
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My eyes blinked open. The apartment was quiet — too quiet. The kind that presses on your ears and makes your heartbeat feel loud. My fingers stretched across the sheets, across the floor where we sat hours ago, where he kissed me like he meant it. Where he made me laugh and feel… safe.
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My stomach turned as I sat up.
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The blanket was still wrapped around me, tucked like someone wanted me to feel cared for. But the way it was done… it felt like a goodbye. A silent one.
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I stood up quickly, heart racing as I scanned the space.
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“Maddox?” I called out, even though I knew he wasn’t there.
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I checked the kitchen. The bathroom. Even opened the front door like he’d maybe just stepped outside for air or a blunt.
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But the street was empty.
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No Maddox.
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No note.
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No trace of him except the soft scent of his cologne lingering in the air and the memory of his voice telling me I deserved better.
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I sat back on the edge of the bed, eyes locked on the wall where we talked about hanging pictures. The room felt hollow now. Like he was the thing that gave it life. Like he was the reason I believed for even a second that I could have more.
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My hand tightened around the edge of the sheet. My throat burned.
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He didn’t even say goodbye.
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He loved me enough to get me out of hell, but not enough to let me fight for him the way I wanted to. He chose for me. Took away the only person who ever looked at me like I mattered, like I was worth something more than the broken pieces I came with.
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A tear slipped down my cheek before I could stop it.
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“You coward,” I whispered, voice cracking. “You beautiful, stupid, selfish coward.”
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But even as I cursed him, I missed him.
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Because he gave me a home… just not him in it.
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And deep down, I knew the truth.
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Maddox was gone. For good.
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