Oppa. She always hesitated to use that word. The intention was too confusing, she thought. How was he supposed to know if she meant “oppa” as in “older brother” or “oppa” as a term of respect for an older guy she knew… or “oppa” as in “honey…” “darling…” “sweetheart?”181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ089UUV5yTA
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It was unfair for a word to have so many meanings. Okay, maybe it wasn’t the only word in any language to have such nuances, but it was one word whose meaning should be absolutely clear and without question.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6L7hKhqfwo
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He started walking to school and back home with her everyday. It wasn’t planned. He lived two floors above her. She had hurried out of her apartment one day, shouting exasperated agreements at whatever her mother was saying, only to come face-to-face with him on the stairs. That was when it started.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2yswTSYUU6
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She would walk beside him, listening to him speak, trying to think of the right things to say. Her clammy fingers would find their way to the skirt of her school uniform and clutch at the fabric. She’d wipe her hands as subtly as she could, just in case he one day decided to hold her hand. She always wondered if he would have noticed her if they didn’t live in the same building.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVe4P90VIU
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All the while, her mouth would rebel against her efforts to call him oppa. Honey. That was what she meant, and she wanted so much for him to know. How was it so easy for the other girls to call the boys oppa? They didn’t waste any effort doing it. She was the only one who seemed to have something broken inside her.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvPGD6qVxGr
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In a fit of desperation, she took to listening to Girl’s Generation’s Oh! on repeat. “Oppa, oppa, I’ll be down, down, down, down,” she sang with them. Maybe if she said it over and over, it would be easier to finally say it when it counted.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWI0oeTgdOb
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And it seemed to work.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjJ7yNWIOSq
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For the first time, she responded to his question with, “Yes, oppa.”181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIofo1mPWUv
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Her heart ballooned in her chest, sweet spring air that smelled of cherry blossoms filling her lungs. This was her confession. He had to finally know how she felt about him.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQdoesivF7
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He patted her head as though she were a child—or a puppy.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZQNyEKgsC
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“I’m so glad you’re finally calling me oppa,” he said. “I think of you as a little sister too.”181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGb1WA2ipZc
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Oppa. She could imagine the deceptively innocent word pointing and laughing at her.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVo28NhB5Mh
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Boy, did she hate it.181Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡctg3gPH05a
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