I always thought I would never be such a sentimental piece of work.copyright protection149PENANATzeWp8rw4a
Yet, here I sat. In the midst of my husband's posessions, wondering how I got here.copyright protection149PENANACpyEeTqDJ3
Of course I knew how, I will never forget that day. The day they stole him from me. The day I officially lost the man of my dreams because of a doctor who got stuck in traffic. Tears welled up in my eyes as I touched one of his work ties.copyright protection149PENANAg2ZPEMWCBv
He always looked so handsome at work.copyright protection149PENANAgndg61oTLk
Wondering why I kept living like this, my mind and eyes wandered around our bedroom.153Please respect copyright.PENANAInldoXmsiY
copyright protection149PENANATfohePHN90
It was strange, almost everything, I had picked out all of our furniture. Except from those obnoxious yellow curtains. They'd gotten old and dusty over the course of our marriage, the colour drained by the sunlight.copyright protection149PENANAMGIw8WTxj9
I liked everything to be clean and white, Ben didn't. He was such a colourful person, truly a ray of sunshine on my pale, monochrome life.copyright protection149PENANAnWI57WILpd
My phone rang.copyright protection149PENANAbSmmpBi1bl
Lance153Please respect copyright.PENANAURQYjK2A6A
copyright protection149PENANAOu7MkeqXo1
"Mom? How' s it going? We'll be over in about an hour if that's okay?"153Please respect copyright.PENANAWbuXPDVkmD
copyright protection149PENANAglZiCBSIda
An hour? I didn't have much time left. I was surrounded by boxes that were all nearly empty.copyright protection149PENANAi5xA5PLcLI
"Oh sweetheart, I am nowhere near ready," I trailed off. Not ready packing, not ready for any ot this. Not ready to be this alone, to be the widow everyone dodges.copyright protection149PENANAXpdhBSQWob
"I know," Lance sighed.copyright protection149PENANATKeF9fwQsr
Our son was born out of pure love. We'd only be together for about a year when I suddenly didn't get my period anymore. I was eighteen and pregnant. copyright protection149PENANA0Qzmn3OI18
Who'd have thought my son would only know his father for thirty years? I was always quite fond of the image of my husband with his grandchildren. Unfortunately, my son was as much of a workaholic as his father was and was not even close to settling down. copyright protection149PENANAA8KVnRAanX
Lance and I had an extremely good bond. He had bought a condo a couple of years back and one in his building came up for sale. copyright protection149PENANAhqq0QEOpfV
I didn't really like the idea of leaving this place.copyright protection149PENANAjR7ggyGmUn
My home.copyright protection149PENANA9IzYdbvR6U
We'd made so much memories in here. I rationalized that that was all this was: memories tied to a bunch of bricks. copyright protection149PENANAH4ktwE4hg6
I was scared that once I stepped out of the box of bricks, the memories would fade. I'd seen it with my mother. The minute she set foot in the nursing home, I felt guilty. My mother was a very emotional person. She stuck to objects that sparked a memory.153Please respect copyright.PENANAv8FASFwukw
copyright protection149PENANASFIJubq879
Always thought that I would never do this.153Please respect copyright.PENANAqhmbb4wMqf
copyright protection149PENANAh65EJIaxhv
I suddenly had an epipheny. What was I doing here again? Living in a shadow of what once was my happy, cherished life. Instead, I could be starting a new life. I needed to, to heal and grow as a person. Make new memories for myself. Make it hurt less.153Please respect copyright.PENANAF4gmdnQ8rg
copyright protection149PENANAoHMQ8QZfv1
The empty rooms here, the chair he used to sit in and the basement full of Ronald's stuff made it so much worse. Made me worse, pained. I could be living in the same building as the son I am so proud of. We'd be close, I'd be close. He could help me when I needed him and I could take care of him when he needed me.copyright protection149PENANA5UasvPtpH8
It would be better for all of us. copyright protection149PENANAobFa399oe6
"You know what? I am ready, hun. I'll be ready when you get here," I told my boy and put my phone down.copyright protection149PENANArktE8kRYo2
Standing up, I took the box that held our photo albums and threw in what made me smile and think of Ronald.copyright protection149PENANAA3wGlE4Lio
His engraved pen and pair of sunglasses that I found on the kitchen countercopyright protection149PENANAIC9TLZ8DtJ
His flannel he used to wear when mowing the lawn, that hung on the doorknob to the laundry roomcopyright protection149PENANA2qJrCOWOXG
And the dusty, old curtain hanging in our bedroom.copyright protection149PENANAqwGPmLarez
He loved it, and I love him. Nothing else mattered. copyright protection149PENANAi0pI3fTPZq
ns3.239.233.139da2