Triggers | Penana

登入

註冊

請使用Chrome或Firefox享受更好的用戶體驗！

留言

顯示更多

0

0

上一章

下一章

樣式

展開

選項

coins

打賞

催更

分享

檢舉

#1

Triggers

shnuffeluv

Nov 25, 2015

740

2 分鐘

x

They start innocuously.

A passing jab

An occasional remark

Daring each other to ask me out but rarely doing it.744Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCXwO8Ka0L

Sometime-I can't remember when-it gets worse

Individual events get blurry, but the idea is the same.

They mock me

They ask me out more, laughing and watching each other to make sure it happens

Every time I respond,

No matter how I respond

Is taken as a joke, either on me or others744Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGVTDCcZUJG

The worst part is always a blur.

They mock me when I had a high fever for a week and couldn't come to school

They mock me when I read to escape their torture

They mock me when they ask me out

They mock me for the things I enjoy

They mock me for being a reader of books, a writer of poems, a watcher of psychology videos

They ask me out, I explain why I say no, and they twist my words against me

They start calling me a lesbian

And the dam breaks

What happens after that...I can barely remember even with great effort.

My mind just can't handle the pain I went through

Someone flippantly says they're "so depressed" for feeling sad one day.

I hold my tongue

But ask if they've ever felt a void where their emotions should be

If they've ever felt sad for days

If their only hope was to escape for a few hours

Before being dragged into the real world again

Just wanting everything to stop, just for a little while, so you can pick up the pieces again

Sure, depression shows up differently in different people,

But neurotypicals never show the real symptoms

There was a boy

A senior

He killed himself my sophomore year

Everyone might tell me to not talk about it

But I have to

Everyone is walking on eggshells,

Not talking much to their friends, let alone me

No one can say the word

Even the teachers are somber

I want to scream,

"I've been there, I know, you can't understand, though you may try, unless you go through it yourself!"

Everyone seems to be asking why,

And my only response is "For him, there was no other way out"

But no one asks.

The egg-shell pieces of my composure are smashed under their feet.744Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZ57RVnwGE

The anxiety attacks set in,

And I can't cope with my triggers

Any more

ns3.144.237.87da2

0

coins

0 喜歡

率先喜歡這期作品！

你已經到達故事的結尾。

標籤（Tags）

未有標籤

喜歡這個故事？快分享吧！

點擊以分享！

你可能會喜歡:

Blood-Red Lipstick

What Is A Writer?

Inside Out: Being Bipolar

100 Demons (And Then Some)

shnuffeluv and 1 Others

Hire Lernin' (A Novel): An Idealist’s Quest Through the Realm of for-Profit Education

Victor D. Lopez

探索更多故事

Triggers

書籤!

催更 0

目錄