「這一句話，我會記上一輩子。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJNFt4cpY34
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwS93QVBsWY
二十年前，我拋下這麼一句話，頭也不回，離開那個家。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX92Ho63fpo
某位於港島區的咖啡店內。淺啡木紋地磚和同調木紋膠板桌椅，配襯白色牆身和米黃色燈膽，輔以多個小盆栽和青色咕𠱸作點綴，簡潔得來帶有滿滿的溫馨。完全符合阿妹理想中「家」的形象。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7RSTj69sWo
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnv9LOGjOHr
我們齊齊長大於日本文化盛行的年代，對日系風格情有獨鍾實屬在所難免。惟鍾愛歸鍾愛，我不禁在心裡吐糟眼前的芝士蛋糕：虛假的芝士味道和香氣，甜得發膩的化學甜，有如焦土的乾癟質地。怎麼可以如此難吃？413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9czcetg6rx
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs1AmjUMTnr
「不喜歡？」阿妹冷道，沒望我一眼，逕自品嚐她的芝士蛋糕和朱古力咖啡。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCrwMz67i7a
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCIzn6i2Zn7
「嗯。」我放下叉子，放棄價值五十元的蛋糕，暗嘆浪費。我寧可花同樣價錢，去茶餐廳吃鹹魚雞粒炒飯。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc6jiXocuLa
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJmb56T4z2
「這是區內最有名氣的芝士蛋糕。」阿妹對我的口味不以為然。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDHgWGyWFUI
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGcNSuX7KBT
「以『難吃』見稱嗎？」我冷嘲，惹得鄰桌的情侣竊笑。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9FDFXShLOq
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPp9bHMVpO
阿妹面色玄青，無視我，低頭享用她的下午茶。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqijbAUdQ9C
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWUW1mO8T2Z
我沒趣地拿出手提電話消磨時間，目光時而在通訊軟件上遊走，時而偷瞄對座的阿妹。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDNg3DAOSL
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ujHbCWifV
我倆之間，是一張深度六百毫米的枱，也是二十年的空白。見面之前，我記憶中的阿妹是個廿三歲大學畢業生，純真無邪，略懂打扮；碰面當刻，舊印象驟然消失，獨一無二的阿妹變成充斥中環的普通辦公室女郎。微卷深啡長髮，濃妝豔抹，粉綠色及膝連身裙，純白色短袖小外套，三吋高跟鞋。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQUSjskwL13
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcinuXL503e
曾幾何時，我深信自己會跟阿妹一樣，成為打扮斯文的辦公室女郎。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiillQ4eneR
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaGJnvrkeIn
我的思緒飄到遙遠的平行世界去，直至阿妹放下叉子：「走吧。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5ng7v8WD7
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjd1kB0sWhc
截下的士，我們直驅醫院去。車廂中，又是令人窒息的沉默。我從倒後鏡瞥望阿妹。她托著下巴，似是對著窗外景物發呆，亦似是從玻璃車廂的模糊倒影觀察我。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8EfNKxPhq
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEKHzV0x03R
「待會兒，態度必須要溫和。」阿妹的口吻帶有「命令」的味道。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4wpwAdLUJx
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFTloiExYr
「盡量。」我是個直腸直肚的人。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgMZBqiSQi
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TQ4NV6HQQ
「難道你沒能大發慈悲，讓媽咪『離開』得安詳？」她略略加強語氣。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAGIK31LFFt
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJLTbzZCoS
「所以我沒有拒絕，而是答『盡量』！」我強抑怒火：「你不是不知道她的嘴巴就是不饒人！難道我要盲目啞忍所有過份要求？」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7E1kNskoW
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dBsWRp3SD
「那天以後，她性格大變，嘴巴再也硬不起來。」阿妹神色放軟。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHuOPHeqVLF
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuY3XkvHqow
我沒駁斥，任由沉默張牙舞爪。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBtZvObvhy
進入私人病房前，阿妹從手袋拿出一個小紙袋，塞到我手裡：「給媽咪的小禮物，佯稱是你買的。」沒待我答允，她已推門內進，不讓我有拒絕的機會。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEWXEE4uzVM
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqja7wqswgV
病床上的媽咪，戴著頸箍，缺了左腿，全身插滿連接儀器的喉管。床頭櫃有熱水壼和膠杯，櫃側有一灰色的膠椅，椅上有她最鍾愛的墨綠色的毛衣。出乎意料，毛衣多年以來仍忠實地守候在她身邊，活像她幻想出來的完美女兒。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNZaGIOVps
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwU04sHrIYF
「送你的。」根據阿妹的指示，我奉上紙袋。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHgB3RDF1g0
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfnWJZxcWPo
媽咪的頭動不了，眼皮使力地開開合合，眼珠子艱難地轉動著，幾經辛苦才成功對焦，看見我。眼淚暴瀉，雙唇微顫，千言萬語卻離不開齒間。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFug0uq0lVs
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBhDDNr5CR
「喚媽咪吧。」阿妹怒目相向，恨我的狠。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wTyTZbTGa
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ7PfdX3l2Z
縱先前對媽咪的病情略知一二，惟在此情此境，我竟反應不來，原地愣住。喜怒憂懼愛憎欲，好比混在一起的彩砂，沒能再分開。粒粒彩砂本來顏色鮮明，在此刻偏偏成了惹人眼花撩亂的雜訊，佔據每吋視線，令我看不清楚自己的心意。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDxPuEQJ9z
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡps9VQqghla
「媽……咪……」我耗盡力氣，千辛萬苦才擠出兩粒字。不情不願，因為找不到自己的位置；心甘情願，因為這是最後的聚頭，該盡力讓事情有個不差勁的結局，算是清還她的養育之恩。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi8rM0jaX1Y
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTC1NCwvBn
阿妹招招手，要我湊近媽咪，讓她看清楚多年不見的女兒。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFck3iBUjfF
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEwAByYHiK
一絲抗拒掠過。我沒打算捕捉它，隨它消逝。我的手腳開始沒那麼生硬，乖乖依從阿妹的指令，走近床邊。阿妹要我給媽咪奉水，我照辦如儀。阿妹要我為媽咪披上毛衣，好，沒問題……不知底蘊的人看見「母慈女孝」的畫面，定會誤會我仨關係良好，感情深厚。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIf2nLScZ2R
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpu78DPg090
整個探訪過程，媽咪沒能吐出片言隻字：她的喉嚨受惡菌感染，非但沒能進食固體食物，甚至失去語言能力。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0dCp6NaAfE
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGOScVQ4vp
不得不承認，我賤格。表面和藹謙恭，底裡毒如蛇蠍。我幻想，如果二十年前的媽咪已失去語言能力，我會否仍生活在這個家，是個千依百順的好女兒？413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWP7oO3VLl
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe7ocRlwdqY
兩小時後，媽咪倦極入睡。阿妹要我先離開病房，在門外等候她。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZfYVxhnuSE
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9GOmhyDT7
甫踏出房門，我與阿姨碰個正著。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSyQdoOtIs7
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgy5xyWmIG
死八婆！若非她當年在旁煽風點火，我和家人的關係未必會破裂收場。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWOVL8wSMyO
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxoUhR9LZYl
「我就是知道你會來。」阿姨擺出料事如神的姿態，以冷峻目光掃視我全身：「很缺錢吧？」講完莫名其妙的一句後，她掏出一張支票予我。「你的報酬。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN9jiUnLBXP
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0Z3PbbePa
我沒有立即接下，思疑她在打甚麼鬼主意。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJui8dw5Ur
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tMInqNzbK
湊巧，阿妹從病房出來，看見我和阿姨在門口僵持，立即上前解釋事情因由：「我沒有告訴她關於支票的事。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8xrzZxTWuN
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1IlEktuuU7
「你的意思……她不是為錢而來？」阿姨拿著支票的手緩緩垂下。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxjjZ3agEG
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZHvmuffXru
「嗯。」受壓於阿姨的強勢，適才不慍不火的阿妹怯怯點頭。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Xzabv2wj1
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPwEkYqzlTc
「那麼……」阿姨猶豫了半晌，最終還是決定將猜忌放進問題裡。「你為何而來？」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4H5qXkFoMp
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHc8bYM6Ktz
「出於對老人家的憐憫和惻隱。」我胡謅，強裝正氣凜然。其實我未曾細想自己為何而來。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Cd0kYnu3v
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnLPss0LbsK
「很好。可以省掉。」阿姨有意無意地將支票在我面前晃來晃去。逗狗似的。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEW7hh79nVX
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Ml1Q22w1M
「如果沒有別的要事，我先離開。」我選擇了忍耐。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcxqcsEGUOn
醫院外的大路上，人不多，三三兩兩的。探病的、求醫的、久病初癒的、迴光反照的。我屬於哪種？該是「半死不活的」：情況沒有差得要死，卻怎也活得不好。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY0XggXzs8m
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD7kttVFYMU
缺錢？工作不順利？與丈夫婚姻不和諧？與子女有代溝？統統不是。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxl8SsYzNKf
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXve30vJBXm
僅是純粹的不快樂，若有所失。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGgHHJodcH
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUVkOrlueD
每當我感到幸福時，記憶就會成為粘粘的漿糊，將我黏在內心的缺口上。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8MfqsZ6IXX
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWECIKnKHZG
「等……我……」阿妹的聲音從後傳來。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Aad1Kx1Ce
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgNhugdl9sc
我佯裝聽不見，加快腳步，務求撇下腳踏三吋高跟鞋的她。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2Ax0aWFML
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTklE9XXCfL
「家姐！」豈料阿妹不顧儀態，高呼大叫，吸引途人們的目光。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGdZeuYoH0
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6zEvQEF0IW
我的雙腳不自已停下來。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKLsn45JEpk
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQUMSHaNn5R
不消十秒，氣喘如牛的阿妹跑到我身邊來：「謀……殺……嗎？」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodKmG1Y6pJ
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6YdKi4RR1
我鐵著臉，沒意欲跟她開玩笑。「那張支票，是誰的主意？」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWfNKEc7vx
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡumR9fcj2pF
「媽咪。」阿妹不敢正視我雙眼：「她覺得你會拒絕到來。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡELxV2uQTEA
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWeEYW4uVpq
「你們仍舊認為我是嫌棄家境窮困而離開嗎？」我本不欲重提舊話，奈何我忍不住要再次辯解。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZdLOqYo8n
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IQMGWuDGJ
「我們想不到其他原因。」阿妹的答案隱含委屈。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgQkTz9h70
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQbDlBO7Du
「我從不認為我們家境窮困。」我氣得開步走。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtDheAlRTN
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBOa9oAeye
阿妹連忙拉住我的衣袖，轉換話題：「有興趣跟我和阿姨吃晚餐嗎？我們會與你討論遺產事宜。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIPKXID1pFj
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1hFz5EzJR
「沒有。」我乾脆利落地拒絕。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVfEb1YfvRq
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmf6vy1EyRW
「僅僅一頓便飯而已。」阿妹屢敗屢試。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9YxmnMeiXO
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkwUJnRhTq
「不了。」我稍稍施力甩開她的手。「你倆把錢分掉吧。無需通知我。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14X9sZvo03
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4Jv6tHIz2
「我會轉告阿姨。」世故的阿妹知道我在顧忌誰。「但你可以和我一起晚餐嗎？只是我跟你！」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzo1B9zKhif
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVCHSqi3he
我意識到這是她最後一次的邀約，再也講不出拒絕的說話，迷迷糊糊地與她並肩而行，行到醫院附近的咖啡店。她為我點了抹茶蛋糕和朱古力砂冰，聽聞是鎮店之寶。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMYMuox5L8
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnFaCcJka0n
我嚐了一口。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2s2YKf3w9r
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcwVZOpzrnn
甜得要命。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFq4ffZPmHH
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMygYEa88xI
「你是否不再喜歡吃甜品？」阿妹從我的難受表情找到端倪。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTlDlpKlNcb
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡID3RLt6KH5
我傻傻點頭，驀然記起自己曾經是個無甜不歡的傢伙，對咖啡店的精緻甜品更是愛不釋手。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuVhszlUk0w
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF51vERR4W5
「我對你的印象停留在二十年前。」阿妹眼裡盡是懷緬。「溫柔的、膽小的、笨笨的家姐。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN2ZL1D0FNg
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoj97we9bcT
「我自問從不是溫柔的傢伙，純粹是害怕開罪別人而假裝溫柔；我不是膽小的，至少我比你更有離家出走的勇氣；我不是笨笨的，起碼我有能力比你更先離開。」我努力提起叉子，再嚐一口蛋糕。很難吃。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡalGZK1M9tU
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8XDPUIMrE
「難怪你要走。」阿妹噗嗤假笑，表情苦澀得複雜。「我們自以為了解你、明白你，不明白何以你最後竟捨棄我們……」她那握叉的手重覆戳向蛋糕，直至它成漿成糊。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9AE7RceZhu
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd7QWOWRL4O
「其實我也不了解你們。至少，我沒有想過你們會利誘我來探望媽咪。」我苦笑搖頭：「我理解他們何以會不明所以。」由始至終，我在意的人只有阿妹。「你呢？你比他們更了解我的處境！別以為我不知道你當時同樣想走！」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Byya15wcl
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ7mSduhGFj
「你終於承認當時是知道我的想法！」被我戳到痛處，阿妹失儀地將叉子擲在碟上。金屬叉子碰瓷碟，有如我的話碰她的心，發出響亮而清脆的碰擊聲。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDtBUt6Zxpo
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4AfCGoc2A
「為何你不帶我走？我日盼夜盼，盼望你會聯絡我，帶我走。在意識到你不會帶我走時，我又開始催眠自己，說你遇到意外，說你被壞朋友騙了，說你尚未安頓下來……我不知道該要怎麼辦！413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxYLK3oDv5s
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGuegC41XBi
我有很多很多問號！ 413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxaUEYNpkR
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhBULCixJJ
我不明白你的想法！我不清楚自己在你心目中的位置！我不明白為何我要為你編作解釋！我不明白為何我信任的人會拋棄我！我不肯定自己能否負擔起整個家！明明是我倆的共同責任，為何我要獨自承受？」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3R53FYTdGi
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mBuVzqyOZ
「因為你是壓垮我的最後一根稻草。」思緒千迴百轉，最終我決定長話短說，淡然將描述她揮金如土的萬字怨言吞回肚子去。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBvP9fIaiB
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvgVaVUqnuc
霎時間，阿妹答不上話，直視我雙眸，似是觀察我的表情，希望能夠從中找出一絲歉疚，亦似是在乞求我大開金口，施捨半句道歉話。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpPPQ3nMaLl
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEZ7SYeimgX
可惜，我沒打算繼續在她的生命裡留下甚麼。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbyw8iprko
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuxyndU8JE
「算了吧。」為打圓場，阿妹選擇口不對心：「反正我們以後不會見面，不需要執著彼此。」若果她真的能夠放下執著，適才就沒能細數她的痛苦點滴。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rBqz1Uyy0
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ3kd9218xk
「是的。」我釋懷一笑，放下叉，不再勉強自己清掉碟上的蛋糕。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF56gOgOVA7
用餐過後，我和阿妹公式化地道別，從此分道揚鑣。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLUc85fkyP
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBUFm2etfl2
我看看手錶，晚上十時許。路人不多，疏疏落落的。黃光路燈斜照著路人們，照出多個長腿叔叔。故事中的長腿叔叔是個擁有美滿人生的紳士，現實中的我們卻是破碎殘缺的獨立個體。東一塊，西一塊，難以湊成一個家。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8AdJj5cd8
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTyeg02lx1a
需要感到遺憾嗎？無需要。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSoagHyNsq
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1Wrvy4hkb
曾有感到遺憾嗎？曾有。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgYrRm8kKSs
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdC3fagv8M
會繼續感到遺憾嗎？不會。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDtcaBt6rC
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDKM56bedm
我慢步走向鐵路站。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEA0wjGpm6z
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBddpuJ216
慢慢的，慢慢的，有如二十年歲月一樣慢。漫長的二十年裡，我一步一步走過來，無數次踏在內心的缺口上。自以為腳掌會感受到缺口的虛空與不平，自以為低頭就會看見缺口的廣闊與無邊，自以為缺口會永遠存在。殊不知缺口已在不知不覺間被時間撫平。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWzXZ85MQa
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHywj7O17yj
剛才我不是故意將不快記憶輕描淡寫，而是無論我怎麼努力去回想，所有細節都經已模糊不堪。最清晰的，只有我當年留下的那句話。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe7gGbzeKlE
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHUav0W0ZG3
「這一句話，我會記上一輩子。」413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt719q7SA4b
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkr8gD2rhp8
簡單的十一個字，濃縮了多年的壓抑和不滿，是負面情緒的頂點。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxYGlgAvLBu
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkdaTomvZSq
說話離開了唇角，繃緊的情緒失去支撐物，慢慢紓緩下來。由最無關痛癢的，至最為要緊的，一點一滴隨年月悄悄消逝。我忘記了誰講出讓我記上一輩子的說話，忘記了對話的內容，忘記了對話的前因……取而代之的，是能夠被握在手心的現在和能夠被觀望的將來。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6FIcKtQBA
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppQQPgWWIN
我倏忽停下腳步，換個方向，走到便利店，買了罐冰凍啤酒。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxLLvjLsyef
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYXUFzFet8w
為何仍清楚記得那份恨意？413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE3GATEA99I
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj3bEY4cEfX
我知道答案。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdtbyDcnl4q
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodduYypHfa
答案像啤酒。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfWBoql672d
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1ilZa53ud
啤酒不是必需品，但我習慣在心情欠佳時喝啤酒。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyCoIaPGlLi
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxFlIlOPqKp
那份恨意不是必須存在，但我習慣了它的存在，習慣用它去概括描述我離家出走前的人生。久而久之，那份恨意就成了那段日子的代名詞。那段日子只有恨意，沒有願望，沒有七情，沒有喜好，遑論快樂。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwiQnz3OZQA
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMWNgAPYSi
我將啤酒一飲而盡。空空如也的啤酒罐精準地落入垃圾桶裡。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34iYJFqODY
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYPuar0041
若果我可以同樣將記恨習慣拋入垃圾桶，該多好！413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBT7a0dvQMV
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiCbMaZd3X2
不要緊。給我二十一天，戒掉壞習慣。413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWCXiPZkjF
413Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsNwAjMiNb
我保證，往後滴酒不沾，吋恨不記。
