I wish I was a beauty for all the world to see;
To be gorgeous, to be perfect is what I want to be.
So he would finally notice just me – only me.
Always pining, always loving no one else but he.
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Instead I am painfully plain, and immensely ugly;
Nothing remarkable, not even a little extraordinary.
Deep inside, he would never notice me –
Never see me pining, never see me loving only he.
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I wish I was thinner with curves in all the right places;
To be sexy, to be alluring, like all those lucky aces.
Then I would show him and those pretty faces,
That someone like me could definitely go to places.
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Instead I am big – a big blob of fat;
Far from being sexy, less alluring than a common rat.
Most of the time, I fear his handsome face,
For I am an embarrassment, a shame of the race.
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I wish I was a woman to fit with him perfectly;
To be loved, to be cared for, and all those sweet things daily.
That he may say I am his so proudly;
Which I will answer, ‘I am yours truly, yours only’.
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Instead I am a man, hopelessly in love with him;
Yearning for his love, yearning for him – always him.
But he will never be mine, just as he wouldn’t love me.
I am, after all, a freak of nature, the worst that can be.
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I wish I could die, cut my life away.
I will do it in a heartbeat, if that is the only way,
For him to see finally me – only me:
Always yearning, always loving him until eternity.
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Instead, I continue on with this living:
Always wishing, only wishing – like a circle, never ending.
I guess, loving him from a distance will be my everything.
He, after all, was, am, and will always be my sweetest undoing.
Any thoughts?
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