O L I V I A
My breath catches in my throat and suddenly I feel ashamed.
Tucker looks between Alessio and I, “What’s going on?”
“Uh,” I look over at Alessio and freeze. “He’s…”570Please respect copyright.PENANAx8RiPrxRZY
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“Alessio Romano. We ran into each other.” Alessio extends his hand.
“I’m Tucker, Olivia's boyfriend,” Tucker doesn’t shake his hand. “Can you meet me later?” He asks and looks at me.570Please respect copyright.PENANAV9x8awxePL
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“Yes.” I nod and my throat constricts.
Without a warning, Tucker swoops me up for a kiss and crushes his lips against mine. He sets me down and I feel unsteady. 570Please respect copyright.PENANA1nO2a7s90H
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I could feel Alessio staring at my back and it made me want to curl up and hide. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAq0ebpmUdHH
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“See you later.”
“Bye…”I whisper out breathless. I felt Alessio’s hand touch the small of my back as he stepped closer behind me.
I turn to him and the tears spill. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize.”
I pull back a little and stare up at his eyes. He looks down at me with a soft smile and kisses my forehead. “I have some things to take care of.”
“Okay…” 570Please respect copyright.PENANADI9qMnf87Q
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“I’ll take you home and you can think things through.”
“No, wait-” He cuts me off with a kiss. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAh7YzY0R4CI
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It feels urgent and almost like he’s worried. I feel myself melt immediately into it and wish we could just stay like this forever.
“Olivia, I love you,” He begins and strokes my cheek, “I would do anything for you, but I also want you to be happy. Take your time, love. I’ll be waiting.”
I fight the urge to force him to tell me to pick him. Every part of my being screams for Alessio. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAiQkh3KllpI
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Why did it feel like he didn’t want to fight?
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After Alessio had dropped me off home I immediately went to my room and sat there forever in silence. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAKVOTKnhHd0
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The drive home was too quiet and Alessio said nothing but kissed me on the cheek as I went inside. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAN95XuACWF8
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It almost felt like a goodbye and it hurt.
My mom had been hot on my trail when I rushed to my room but stopped as soon as she saw the tears pouring down my face. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAD15DeJPe6A
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I was almost grateful when my phone rang and I saw it was Kim.
"BITCH!"
"Nice to talk to you as well.”570Please respect copyright.PENANAj1b7zqC7TY
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"Do you realize how scared I’ve been!” She shouts on the other end. “I thought you got kidnapped. I had to call your MOTHER, Olivia!”
“My mother?” I snorted.
“Obviously! I couldn’t just not inform her that her daughter went M.I.A.”
I sigh, “I’m okay, Kimberly. I got sick and went home.”570Please respect copyright.PENANAST6WUgQpoh
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“Someone saw Austin go in there with you,” Kimberly starts. “What happened, Olivia?”
My chest tightens. “Y-yeah, he helped me lay down and left. I got sick from the alcohol.”
“He didn’t take you home though.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANA3VRKQ575E5
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“No, Tucker did.”
She’s not buying it. “Bullshit! Tucker called me.”
Shit. Shit. Shit.
"Ok! Ok! Fine...Alessio picked me up and I stayed the night with him."
“Ahhhh,” She coos out. “Does Tucker know about the two of you?”
“No, Kim. Let’s keep it that way.” I lie. I wasn’t in the mood to drop all the drama on her.
“Did you get down and dirty?” She moans into the receiver.
"Kimberly!"
I try to change the discussion to her. “I know you did with Joe though!”
She laughs loudly, “Girl, that is nothing new. Joe and I have been getting freaky for weeks.”
“Well, I hope senior prom was everything you hoped for.”
“The alcohol and sex made it bearable, but those decorations were ass.”
The two of us bust up laughing and go into a full blown conversation about the dance and the fight that had apparently broken out at Joe’s house.
Apparently, this is huge Westview High gossip now.
I felt so relieved talking to Kim. Hearing her ramble about random, high school things made me feel so much better about my crazy issues.
I envied her. I envied her normal life.
I wanted to tell her everything. I wanted to tell her about Alessio being in the mafia. I wanted to tell her about Austin being murdered. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAWbR3kQXHqb
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I wanted to tell her that I’m in love with Alessio Romano.
“Listen, I have to run, I have a date but let’s catch up tomorrow.”
I smile sadly, “Of course, have fun!”
The line goes dead and I fall back on the bed.
What was I supposed to do? 570Please respect copyright.PENANATrcpVkUidB
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The right answer would obviously be to pick Tucker. He was the safe option right? 570Please respect copyright.PENANAA9Ada8UHlS
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Did I love Tucker though? 570Please respect copyright.PENANA974W29wTPe
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No, I didn’t. I knew that right away. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAGq7VUjDVLq
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I did love Alessio though.
I just wanted someone to slap me and tell me to choose Tucker. I should be with the normal boy who isn’t in a mafia family. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAIHkSGq6UbX
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Tucker doesn’t kill people. Tucker doesn’t have to take over a high-profile Italian mob.
Tucker is safe.
Yet, there’s so much he doesn’t do for me like Alessio can. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAEP6sRiPjML
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Alessio ignites something in me I’ve never known before. He keeps me on my toes and I’m constantly wanting more with him. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAcQ0MNJkyRp
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He’s dangerous and exciting. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAjuB0dA2alK
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He could give me a life of my dreams.
I should hate him for what he is, but I don’t. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAenOJs0t2vc
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Not even a little bit.
"Olivia?"
I pick my head up and see my door push open a tad. “Yes?”
My mom peeks in, “Can I come in?”570Please respect copyright.PENANAU1gX7J50St
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I move to the edge of my bed and she walks in. Her blue eyes are comforting and soft. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAIezVQPmnIl
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“You really scared me, Liv.”570Please respect copyright.PENANAQo7AmbHaes
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I sigh, “I’m sorry. I just had a crazy night.”
"Are things going okay at school? Kimberly? Tucker?"
I groan,” Let’s not do the whole lecture thing.”
She shakes her head and holds my hands. “I’m just trying to be here for you, bug.”
I roll my eyes but can’t help but smile at her.
"Things are just...confusing.”
“I’m here to talk,” She pats my hand. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAFfksH9TeEh
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“I just have a big decision to make.”
"Want me to help?"
"I think it's something I need to figure out alone this time."
She nods and stands up to leave.
“Wait!” I call out and she looks back. “How...how did you know dad was the one?”
She smiles a little and sits next to me again. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAYTWXnsI8y4
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“I met your father when I was about your age. I was working as a waitress in a little diner and I had been waiting on him and his friends.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAI69u8AG3NL
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She looks up and her stare tells me she is getting lost in previous years.
“He was so kind to me and gave me his full attention. He’s always been such a gentleman and so handsome.”
She winks at me and I jokingly gag.
“After my shift, I had finished cleaning up and he waited for me. He walked me home and gave me his number. We went on some dates and a year later he proposed to me on my 18th birthday.”
I study her face and see how in love she is with him. She talked about him with no hesitation. 570Please respect copyright.PENANA5PiWoIA0ca
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No doubt at all for their love.
She looks over at me. “Does that help at all?”
“Yes, mom.”
“Whatever it is, Olivia. Just know...I think you should go with who makes you happy. Don’t settle for anything.”
She gives me a kiss on the forehead and leaves the room again.
Once she’s gone, I pick up my phone and stare down blankly at the screen to see Tucker is calling.
“Hey!”
“I’m sorry! I haven’t even had a chance to get ready.”
“Take your time! I’ll see you in an hour.” He replies and I smile sadly at the phone.
“See you soon.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAczs1DkG1CT
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A L E S S I O
“How are you?” 570Please respect copyright.PENANArHfLcLTZUm
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I look up from the cigarette in my fingers and see Anna step out onto the balcony.
“I’m alright. Why?”
She pops up onto the ledge. “You seem sad. Olivia?”570Please respect copyright.PENANAwpztPIVkBA
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“Just things I’m figuring out.”
“I’m here to help,” She offers gently. “I know it’s weird to take advice from your big sister, but I’m pretty wise.”
I roll my eyes at her smug expression.
"I'm aware, sis."
“So…”She pushes. “Want to talk about it?”
“I’ll humor you,” I ash the end of the cigarette. “I told Olivia I’m letting her make her decision.”
"A decision?"
“Between Tucker and I.”
She starts to laugh uncontrollably and I glare at her.
“Don’t tell me you are worried she’ll pick him.”
I shrug and look at the sun casting shadows across the garden. “Maybe, I am. She deserves a happy and safe life.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAU0Mzti7ec8
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“She loves you, Alessio.”
I stare at her for a moment. “You think so?”
“Yes, Alessio. She’s madly in love with you. Don’t let that go.”
“You know,” I start and take a drag. “I told her about the family.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAA1A1CWX9hO
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Anna’s jaw drops, “Why would you be-” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAuMEyQKVaS3
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I cut her off. “Calm down, Anna. She’s not going to say a thing.”
“You have to be careful, Alessio. If Adolfo finds out he’s going to literally kill you both.”
“She won’t be of any trouble,” I mutter. “That’s also one of the reasons I know Tucker is her safest option.”
Anna nods and looks out at the scenery with me. “What about Monica?”
“I’ll handle it.”
“Tell Adolfo you refuse?” She offers.
I scoff at her ludacris idea, “You know that’s not possible. You are in an arranged marriage.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANA1yUaQ5etcm
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“I love Alonzo though.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAgcRnjI9J3t
“I’m glad,” I tell her and a strand of hair blocks my view. “Let Giovanni know we need to wrap up some stuff. You can join us.” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAEZQ3cetKbu
She hops up from the banister with excitement. “Give me like ten minutes!” 570Please respect copyright.PENANACd3BK0iggY
I laugh a little at her reaction and look back out towards the sky. 570Please respect copyright.PENANA2wKAhJEMKk
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Seeing Tucker with Olivia today had really fucked me up. They seemed so normal together. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAHzoQQyZGTd
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She deserved to have that. A normal, easy-going life.
I couldn’t give Olivia those things. 570Please respect copyright.PENANA7n9O3Iv8Rv
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What if she ended up wanting kids? 570Please respect copyright.PENANAAEdG7np4I1
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Would she really want to bring kids into this kind of life. I know she’d resent me.
She’d always be in constant fear like Anna. She’d spend her nights wide awake terrified of what is to come. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAetmXTgJ7Wk
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She would constantly be at risk just being with me. 570Please respect copyright.PENANAG7SXmWrteS
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I can’t give Olivia the world. I wouldn’t always be there on Christmas. I would be away for months at a time handling business. 570Please respect copyright.PENANANEfi6QHl5h
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She’d be so alone. 570Please respect copyright.PENANABlj6n9BgSu
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I might miss important milestones if we were to have children. I might miss important memories with her.
What if I could have those things though? Did it really hurt to try?570Please respect copyright.PENANALdkt7cR8BG
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We come from two different worlds. It just feels so impossible.
“Alessio!”
I turn around and find Anna back on the patio. Her eyes are wide and she has blood covering her hands.
I immediately start checking for wounds, “What the fuck happened?” 570Please respect copyright.PENANAcfNC5Eswqr
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She says nothing and stares at me blankly. She’s in shock.
“Speak to me!” I snap and slap her cheek.
“Giovanni...and…”
"What about Giovanni?" I ask, panicked.
"He...he's been shot."
I let go of her and move past while pulling my gun from the waistband of my jeans.
"Alessio...wait."
I turn around at her. Rage and fury fueling me. “What now?!”
“Beto was shot too.”
My body stiffens and I feel sick. “What are you saying to me?”
“I could be wrong...I don’t know, Alessio. I couldn’t find his pulse.”
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