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第二章 —— 粉碎心靈而行
EP 1
知性逆襲
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是否忘記了初衷499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmjttmaWXB
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有一件事，她從來不理解，照其個性，那怕重來也不明白，為什麼、如何、怎樣地，質疑事實，儘管已經繞之而轉一輩子了，每一角落、真相的碎片亦熟知499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOsOBssDRpj
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還沒有學會「接受」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwyGnoT28SK
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接受現實499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxuMn1Xx2JC
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因為認為是屈服499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsAlD2qOQz
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感覺好像自己在投降499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4kiKRsS0Bf
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放棄一切499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2BpLFWuvP
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追求完美至上，而不允許錯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANmw4zcgI7
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如其之出生，尤像生活，所聽、知，授教的499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ614QDagVxS
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認為是這樣子的狂妄499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFXe9bRs0XE
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無他499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWT1tN9nTH
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說是愚痴也不過份499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQRCy2sv6n
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只是她不相信499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxio0poCQvB
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懷疑499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRUP9ubl43W
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她⋯⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKZymaQDPr
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「⋯⋯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbZN5mQXJL0
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由一開始，女孩的這種個性就已經總結了此下場，這並不為因果關係，純粹因這個下場的發生堪於必然，而是狀況的現象化，星星的模樣，是因為太遙遠才是唯美而存，近看，以生命來燃燒的想法，無比嚇人499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ83nbhRbJ4z
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單單是想像也有夠不安499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtptQcBlzvK
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儘管此刻的自己也如看鏡面一樣，對此狀況不只是目擊證人，近是案內者，經歷者499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBOzNnDmVK
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但若論為什麼會對其驚訝499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡos1L73LPB2
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唯一句499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnTqCIYfAk2
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當局者迷，旁觀者清499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIK2ZqMflS
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當初，我也不曾察覺其他的事情，只為信仰而活的自己，追求理想的結局，拋棄所有的我499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDPAedniiU6
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根本不在意自己的身體點燃上星似熊烈499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWeqC04ryTc
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想法，是會傳染、變異、影響、控制499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp2F37Caykq
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且不死，無法殺死499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRA4GICakQF
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人家已經很盡力了499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡabXZg7Mivy
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我一直嘗試在抵抗這份感情499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhmaX05IrS
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憤怒499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUxSbkLyrEA
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一直以來無論多麼努力亦不能有什麼結果499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLModIrHo9
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因為我沒有用499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGW9rTi4ARr
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因為我的能力不足
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—— 咯 ——
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輕輕地扭開門把，金屬的把條縮回門鎖之中，角度的漸大，門的打開，男人就在該處站著499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTiPvrUC44Z
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「是的，陳熒羽⋯對嗎？」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwdOtN6bnlQ
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「嗯⋯嗯⋯⋯打擾了」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzFlrdNEesO
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進入到久違的房間，和記憶同模印的擺設佈局，主色調為米色，副色白499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuoAvI0DWiO
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—— 咔 ——
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關上門，房間消音的性質方真正開始，完全隔絕外在，此處的所有聲音仍會遭吞蝕，留在這裏，只有這裏，才將自己從這個世界中抽離499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQhILNUKqrZ
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沒有吵鬧聲
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餘下的，是自己腦內的聲音499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcTgKbbAiby
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與其說是喜歡，說是比較、偏好才對，始終腦內的聲音，一直停不下來499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7RdirTxBWM
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討厭
討厭
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「唔⋯⋯對不起⋯上次臨急改期⋯」
「不，沒關係」
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男人走向沙發，攤開掌心，以手勢示意
「來，請坐」
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對他點頭道謝後，我往位置坐下來
「那麼⋯最近睡得還可以嗎？」
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「唔⋯嗯⋯還可以⋯⋯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH1SXpK8nLW
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深呼吸，讓血管稍微收壓、放鬆，使心跳稍為緩下499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy7QGT1psL5
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舔了舔下唇，我才繼續
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「⋯最近⋯夜驚的情況⋯有改善到」
「但還是有嗎？」
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「嗯⋯」
胸口的壓力感在說完話後消退，弄得自己好像成就了什麼大事般
「⋯這樣喔⋯沒關係，不用勉強，放鬆就可以了」
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「嗯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKSXrbanNrj
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⋯⋯
那對眼睛
⋯
不要一直看過來⋯⋯
不要⋯不要——
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已經無法呼吸了多久？499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2yudK5z2bW
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太久了，不過至從學懂存在，便已經失去了呼吸的權利，「自由」一字的概念遙遠得不但不能觸及，甚至連想像的機會也沒有，提心吊膽地呼吸，屏住心跳，一輩子活在的地方 —— 恐懼而不和平的暗影之中499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHwf6NyXI3
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已經失眠了多久？499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5qU3oqZyj
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失眠不是問題，而是衍生出來的結果，閉上眼睛仍然無法逃離，知道張開眼睛所面對的未來，毫不期待，害怕未來，受到過去而滿身傷痕，無論如何也得不到明天，好想好想那裏也不去，不前進不回去，待在原處，寧願原地踏步，寧願當個別人口中的笨蛋，討厭改變，卻499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ic2dU1Ddg
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卻⋯卻⋯⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI6F74Nh5Ta
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一點不想繼續這樣承受下去，而終究還是困在如此循環中，沒有所謂「時間」的存在，昨天即是今天，明天也去不了那去，等候自己的未來，只是幻覺499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvWZA16QR8
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還是說，世事可以和大家口中一樣嗎？
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由開始，已經不像任何人的前提，是可以怎叫自己活得正常，我不能、不會、不懂，現在不會，將來也是，儘管我是對這強烈不滿499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ngQs7rrFb
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但我有選擇嗎？面對種種，難道有其他方法嗎？
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每天晚上也這樣想著，徹夜未眠，哭過無數次，甚至麻木，到淚水不自覺流在臉上，同樣的床，同樣的夜空，左右被冷意包圍，呆呆無意墮入腦內499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2n9EeDb2w0
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好想，一覺不醒
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即使每一次的夢也不完美，我知道自己的夢有多麼壓迫，難受苦人又使人瘋狂，但好歹是夢，醒來之後便能脫離，不似得這個現實，所在所有的破生活，根本忘不了，尤其這份痛苦，以夜以日頻頻萌生新的根，扎在過迫的心靈中499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrYlOgkUaIG
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恨不得粉碎了之，那怕會死
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死一死也蠻好嘛
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結束就好了
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—— 別開玩笑了
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人家也希望能夠快樂499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLu1lrl4nfg
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可是從來沒有，是完全沒有一個這樣的機會499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXC27ZHPMgc
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也希望被愛
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也希望被認同
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⋯⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs0abpvkAcM
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我不知足？
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⋯⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuUlh8rrSh3
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這世界一開始也沒有給到我們些什麼，「足夠」也是自己所定義的不是嗎？沒錯吧？！499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfYR0IfdKpK
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——呀？
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嗯？499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6qz7iHTbmn
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又是這樣
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難得我想表達自己，鼓起勇氣，想成為別人所希望的模樣，總是在自己嘗試前攔下自己，阻擋自己到前方去，但明明是同一班人叫人家去相信，要怎樣怎樣努力，結果又只是說說而已499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvGKTtsgDB7
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ24WbWSaVx2
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghszS5rqwB
我是笨了一點，呆了一點，像個白痴，直接當成傻仔也不過份，然而⋯⋯然而⋯我⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ44XqTesGDQ
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我也想活下去
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoPwkLrEVhL
但一而再，再而三，真正阻止我從現況中掙扎出來的，是同一人，給予假希望，當自己不足為提，尤如走狗又好，簡直為玩具，喜歡便拿來玩，不喜歡便拿出來踐踏好一番，然後沒了興趣時，就隨手一丟，棄之不理
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpY6jN7XS8J
莫名其妙，但真的好痛，我嘗試將心比己，下場居然是遭隨意玩弄然後棄之，我躲起來哭時又在安慰我，這是什麼？
這是什麼？
我寧願自己一人好了
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjIr2BxAjIz
一直以來，我的人生，完全是自力更生，因為沒有那個誰，能真正幫助到我499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxe4y3wKx4z
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvK5zUY390D
或是說，我不希望⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡml8330afKA
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBsfQNdztv9
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnRTcB3ATu
⋯⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqZ1nS50vg
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyOWGkxWulQ
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對不起499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3f0pi2jTl3
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡajZe8RzzeT
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHN7QVv9nbH
我也希望自己⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtE1hXWORG
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNGMQBWqMj
不過⋯⋯
「⋯那麼好了⋯今天就先這樣吧」
「剛剛斷藥一星期，狀況已經是有很大改善了」
「所以你真的不用那麼勉強自己」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58P1LmYbdM
「唔⋯⋯」
「既然完成了⋯那麼⋯」
男人深呼氣，站起，走近自己
「我們還有些時間」
「嗯⋯」
緊張，我吞口水下騷燥的喉嚨
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmL28MLeYDN
男人他站在自己後面，就在沙發椅子後面，伸手按下椅旁的按鈕，讓椅背調低，另一手則是在輕輕地撥弄自己的額髮，角度之下，我能直視之俯視的顏容499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxX4SPcgaUV
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTh7hmaHbb
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAVcwcDdnxy
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH4oLa8qLFB
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBHw46F8xa7
角度最大，椅背的最低，躺在沙發上的自己在剛才過度集中精神，現時便持續精神疲勞狀態，稍有腦昏，意識模糊，但仍然，我知道接下來的發展
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBhSItQoWb
對此，心跳開始不受控制，我的呼氣聲明顯大了
「剛剛在外面的是？」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgqkmNwsQt
「⋯哥哥」
「不再是家人以外的嗎？」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMP9QzVyZM
「⋯⋯嗯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6Mk7LAcNg
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqJPcJ5EQo
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfz9ES1GgmF
男人緩緩地往自己校服裙領，衣領，膀子那邊伸手，溫柔，但快速地解開鈕扣，使頸前空間寛鬆些許
「哥哥⋯⋯會討厭哥哥嗎？平常」
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「很少⋯」
「真的？要説真話喔」
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「⋯⋯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZ4JmCyniy
「真的」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡysuFd5Ue1g
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Q5TfyPZx1
反手，迅速地拉下了背後的拉鍊
「這樣嗎？」
—— 『反正會變成怎樣，我也不在意了』 ——
托著肩，使自己稍為露出背給對方看
「⋯哎⋯不行喔⋯沒穿嗎？」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt7AcOyrc9x
「今天趕著出門口便⋯」
「不行呢⋯你可要注意一下自己的身份喔」
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「對不起——呀⋯」
「是我的手冷嗎？」
「還可以嘛？」
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「沒事⋯只是有點緊張⋯⋯」
「也不是第一次了呢，放鬆吧」
「我會盡快的」
除下上面的部份，完全露出後背來
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzFmbgT9b3
沒有直接看，觸感因而格外特出
「不看過來嗎？」
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「⋯⋯不用了⋯」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ129mpal4RJ
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmftSRXQyYB
世界內完全隔絕其中的空間，我的呼吸才叫無比格外突出的存在
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8cFhe7g0zI
冰冷的手撫在這副體溫比常人高個1-2攝氏(C)度，對比之下任何東西才更為清晰，尤其一對一之下，我方才明白自己的真正
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJmeoerjpV
從背縫伸入裙中，撫著背脊，繼續下去
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQzh7i6dl6k
往那兒去
「啊，醫生⋯那、那個⋯」
突然地動了動，使男人的動作暫停了半頓499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy9PGemvp4S
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8AYhhB3cQe
「可以⋯不要嗎？」
「不行」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzrnEbD8yM
「⋯我怕痛⋯」
「⋯⋯要先從前面來嗎？」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwqYprCr5iz
「⋯⋯嗯，拜託⋯」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRHbgRHw0u
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBM0F4sNYB2
抽手，繞過身，徬如要抱住自己
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見他的手遲遲不動，意識到什麼的自己方才示意
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDtHc32kCv8
拉起裙子，他的手伸至自己下腹
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2awkxwkVU
如記憶一樣強烈的感覺，身體因那股不只為痛楚之上的刺激稍為扭計抽搐，更可能因感覺過為久違而特別地格外，淚水溢出，我知道不可以動，但下盤，比較近的那處，完全就不聽命
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDTvlqqgUp2
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexWLqUvbUq
「哈⋯醫生⋯呀⋯手⋯手⋯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NrhdVxxsP
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ12elMwMQTK
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD11fKlRGMl
伸過來另一手，習慣性地抱住在臉前，口前，咬住499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcxaexNJEr
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2mgL0M1DN
「唔⋯唔⋯咿！」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQL5Ryf0aUZ
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBbPBUXQW08
最後一記，最強烈
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5qox9sMSyU
「⋯哈啊⋯」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCIe9gZT7V
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY24ERcgOm4
鬆口，直至其手到胸口499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Mz5Q9M4Fs
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvwIl0GkVC
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyAAMCrplkX
儘管此處沒有下面的刺激，但仍然⋯痛楚必居多，畢竟是心臓
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrfaywxWBkd
放在前方，我閉上眼睛，任由感覺告訴自己而不想目睹
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaTn9gCY2bC
卻似乎⋯在自己預備好之前已經結束
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0EW7oYaXAZ
「⋯啊？」
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa0ksljMaTG
連咬也不用，只有半秒的電流感
「前面完成了」
男人如此說道499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXUH9PWxD5q
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtkKMFe1lGz
那麼接下來⋯
「那麼⋯」
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「⋯⋯來吧⋯快點完事吧」
「好的——」
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「等、等等」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8qWZJwwUXC
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbuWwgj76na
在他的手移至自己背時，我叫止
「⋯⋯」
「怎麼了？」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRv23iAWEa0
「我調轉身體，趴著，您從後面來⋯⋯比較容易對吧？」
「你喜歡吧」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKG4b3Bnjq
「⋯⋯嗯⋯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2vjVwHhjc
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUF7LCyryDD
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6o1TXimR3
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFtN1b5TERH
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDkQ2UkEAm
完全將裙子脫下，連最後一塊布料也脫下，掛在一旁，接著倒轉，趴在沙發上499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1GYSZtMRBf
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmsTfnEl8n
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyeuBFOIbji
沒有什麼停頓的時間，在感覺到之際，我閉上眼睛
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmrsqNGF9Xu
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJwVG1A2OA
好痛
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡig6xxIzzLS
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但會有人在意嗎？
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvl6RzhFCHc
他會、她會，但我不想使任何人擔心
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJMZmB4uj7
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpFNVOxjbjT
始終倒頭來，人家我根本不會怎樣和人相處，完全不出奇，毫無意外，畢竟沒有人教導過我，也沒有這個機會，本來與人相處，我也沒有那個需要，但另一個需求，更不想去實踐
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoC1tIM6IP3
無數次因能力不足的錯敗，完全是拖延別人進度的我在之前找不到自己的位置，現在也不能，即使以自己的能力而言，是會完全勝任
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWcSqpfpea
單單經驗，和他一起高居其上，但致命的是臨場發揮，我不能499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ48xyGrtSfy
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfwFLJXtH4A
長期的壓力與否認積累下來，成為了自己那無形的牆，困住自己，我⋯⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9EzjGIctPs
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRq9eGFovOa
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1E6bZd24rJ
永生而來也是所謂「理性」的囚奴
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMR32NUIUf
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpy5fwqm9nW
名為「理性」的魔物是我腦內的聲音，也是各種困難的化身，我無從逃離，因為它無處不在499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhdUJjNorQ
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZK07lRXbRn
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsUYPxBRYf5
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmZj0nwozo
每日侵喰自己的精神，我口中的疲累，永遠會是先指精神疲累，做事，任何一件也是，它亦會阻止我，更不止一次而是無限多次
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsHHx4KnSG4
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyKfQy5Bh4
控制我的動作，以自己的精神和動力為糧，在開始點絆倒自己，途中不斷勸退自己的努力，在受傷時再插自己一刀，在面對困難時成為負擔，以及那些不斷催促自己前進的壓力，成為自己真正到不了那去的最主要原因499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rMx4568FX
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡno1eArCOja
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWIdsAU0Wvw
比較下，條件不由自己定
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAQP4SMdIO
我沒有選擇權499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEdDQjmhDC
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEtJsSpKHuA
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokkYg5krcS
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1j5nqhsvaQ
就連思考時，亦會來作崇，煽動自己做出愚蠢之動，決定時一二不是，我失去了選擇，見步行步什麼的，對我而言只是屈服499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCUazejtoM
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApzdSvOguS
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxg7p03RlI6
明白嗎？499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfL8UfKOKk5
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzywxf9FPuN
我不是不想努力，而是我所有事的起跑線都比別人遠、艱苦，無法正常地思考的痛苦，總是被他人卑視又白眼，我在努力，他們看到嗎？可以讓我努力嗎？499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJIFA9CqW25
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWGo5GsdcLp
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU7hrtXnFq0
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG51wLn7tiJ
若世界更溫柔的話——
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不可能499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEAo1MgTMg
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoc18gsOSz8
故然，我的作用⋯也沒有所謂的意義499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95GQrGUvv5
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什麼也沒有499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKL4oyGRvNl
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGvLapSsGJe
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在邊緣望向彼方，死亡那，我想過去嗎？499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0pPV0J38uG
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWKtPS2dFLS
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當然499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrwnCce9qw
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絕對
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3Ca6oVTtB
不想499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFeXqZOViBy
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqjNk2paLpL
但始終，真的太辛苦了499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmjTotDHZJ
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⋯⋯499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEX5g3CudO1
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思考真的太辛苦了499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhMxopbbPp2
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUToDOUWaIS
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfQ92MkqXqn
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyhpf4zrSAU
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0yYjwlSsjN
「好了，怎樣了？痛嗎？」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsjDlcpmQbY
「呀⋯⋯還可以⋯啊⋯」
「嘛，好像新的藥劑太強了」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAH05XTsEz
「不⋯不這樣⋯我真的會休克⋯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBS6aqUiehS
「給人家條毛巾可以嗎？」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8AA45OOw2i
「⋯⋯還有⋯抱歉⋯⋯」
「沒關係，我待會清潔」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cq4ZvniDN
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnh0NhoN6y
「⋯⋯對不起」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡovCuHjoils
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWI2VaQbSFG
「那麼⋯先來聽一下結果吧」
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFv1bEbZ1ev
「嗯⋯」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyTXggrnFX
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLglzM2Ptia
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlePS2ygwyM
「你已經有四成崎品變異融合了」
「骨髓、荷爾蒙、肌肉組織也完全適應了」
「看來，你的身體已經預備好了」
「嗯」
「在不久的將來」
「為新人類的未來祈福，紅雲感激你的犧牲」
曾經，我也有夢想
我希望使他人微笑、快樂
幸福
儘管我不曾能理解
但現實拒絕了我
正在自己徘徊崩潰之際，他們找到了我
說服我成為他們的工具
「忠誠致赤雨之日」
既然已是理性的囚犯，那麼就不自由下去吧，粉碎心靈也好
反正⋯⋯
人家我早已不在意
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最強大的力量，為信念
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499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAb18BMi0fA
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNrX6eU47E
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbKY6OT7be
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjNMy77BA0K
「忠誠致赤雨之日」499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG2ZDhtL8e9
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEJaxyBkyT
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9v4QjD4nHH
女孩說道
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhQMrmA1Ia
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcLhA7fQko
旁周的範圍漸漸陰暗，連光源 —— 燈管，周圍也暗淡
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMDmQWG0M6v
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzDCcb7Sbni
但不是燈光的點滅，反倒是影子的逆襲
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrWqajqBCs
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrxrJXHsY2
是女孩的指示499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqj8o2hxmi
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaUmTOOkB9
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp82aPOYNEV
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMyC0QDEm7V
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTmBLpp4SvM
從其身體散出，影子隨之散至每一個角落，讓漆黑侵佔光明
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6VSPWfzuTC
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqevKCPlVb6
伸手不見五指，女孩逐漸消失在眼前
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡijk32nrNj9
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrvidN7QAZ
直至最後能看見的——499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9rYL9T0DF
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc1bZAvfAWy
也不存在
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡprsbUz1JZR
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh7WQMZHq60
唯好像隱弱聽到了什麼499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJ4PKe0Ebs
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirjdmLiDez
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYo0g259Qlh
但無法辨認499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVvsBPWkbr
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObE3V3nrAY
或是記住至可以重組一個句子
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbE8gDZKSlK
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuXLetiB7tQ
黑暗將自己包圍499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6V2NgJe8D6
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGfwvNPNraY
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxPDErjVJQe
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXTinFmUZzb
不知多久了499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmojez5Rvjj
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKiGQnUcVmM
在那時開始499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7bFZM4PNm
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKoaGLYuOB
那裏499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQtIUaaMkQ
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ZRgaEzj0m
但有些事情〇〇
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9veJdEiU6
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrSmDnHTM7F
〇〇〇499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡftnNrdiR55
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBGrwpcYwUm
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadfenPysz2
〇〇〇〇〇〇499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRDiZoNfCcZ
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ94YTP4A78A
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdA7gVI7W9e
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiiCr7uToSl
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rYGW63FIj
現在不是你的回合499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYahvljtdoY
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDRdViuiIie
499Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpnrckDm5t
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