
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory543Please respect copyright.PENANAe1AtFArnyz
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 543Please respect copyright.PENANAtZIMWAElK2
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.543Please respect copyright.PENANAqQRnr4VOrS
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?543Please respect copyright.PENANAGsfKuhHWKD
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.543Please respect copyright.PENANA0stJtqBpOd
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.543Please respect copyright.PENANAhmISVnubsJ
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.543Please respect copyright.PENANAHomTlzyXKL
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.543Please respect copyright.PENANAHDEcX22LEl
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?543Please respect copyright.PENANAbZFWBUx9kA
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.543Please respect copyright.PENANAxWUCYtuQCD
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.543Please respect copyright.PENANAx9z25vNZEf
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.543Please respect copyright.PENANAZnV8FbIXNd
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 543Please respect copyright.PENANA9WwIfrxy2D
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.543Please respect copyright.PENANAiF9fsJfUI4
girl bestie? - coco <3543Please respect copyright.PENANAj6zy7KIWPH
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.543Please respect copyright.PENANAoFqRW1Acxn
age? - seven years old.543Please respect copyright.PENANAoCOBuyNb84
last person i texted? - idfk.543Please respect copyright.PENANAL08R7zFb6E
last person i called? - probably my little brother.543Please respect copyright.PENANAzoY3z2McLF
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?543Please respect copyright.PENANAJXuTYVhnCc
random fact? - i like food.543Please respect copyright.PENANAPMnL43tqqp
single or taken? - big, fat taken.543Please respect copyright.PENANArmqx0qEH2X
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.543Please respect copyright.PENANANK6uBJGAb7
first kiss? - bitch wtf?543Please respect copyright.PENANAbwLZNGCHrn
ever smoked? - nope.543Please respect copyright.PENANApRRI5opjD5
ever done drugs? - nope~543Please respect copyright.PENANAsSc5BjBbSn
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.543Please respect copyright.PENANAWSgrUQw5l3
longest relationship? - five and a half months.543Please respect copyright.PENANA8xNoxCGujL
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.543Please respect copyright.PENANAQcyDHuiwA7
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.543Please respect copyright.PENANARa8qMlvWto
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.543Please respect copyright.PENANAZhgQwA2Fg4
obsession? - kpop.543Please respect copyright.PENANAhaZZxI4a47
do you give second chances? - that depends.543Please respect copyright.PENANALViSwp3RAl
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?543Please respect copyright.PENANAWd98Atn8Ib
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.543Please respect copyright.PENANAO8WmwoV1yq
day or night? - idk.543Please respect copyright.PENANA2ayQmLBJCc
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.543Please respect copyright.PENANAYOZVO8SSZv
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.543Please respect copyright.PENANAqNmm1hey5D
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.543Please respect copyright.PENANA7gJSOEIXEl
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.543Please respect copyright.PENANAzkUA4yJPMm
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.543Please respect copyright.PENANAmjI0LCtvqI
favourite movie(s)? - idk.543Please respect copyright.PENANAanciHdKZeU
current mood? - bored and tired.543Please respect copyright.PENANAp54WNFsmMT
jealous of? - a lot of things.543Please respect copyright.PENANAPnFo231E61
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.543Please respect copyright.PENANALKP5rtwBeN
pets? - two dogs.543Please respect copyright.PENANAq1ALyql9mo
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.543Please respect copyright.PENANAczErTcfpRi
favourite number? - seven.543Please respect copyright.PENANAxI8MwoVex6
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.543Please respect copyright.PENANAlXgOXxhaxx
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.543Please respect copyright.PENANAQ5Nlo49UOz
afraid of the dark? - yes.543Please respect copyright.PENANAKFXUMhlL63
one wish? - to be happy for real.543Please respect copyright.PENANA3ttmzmMCqb
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?543Please respect copyright.PENANAFqPwIOZwoJ
~543Please respect copyright.PENANA3SEcvLhDFs
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.543Please respect copyright.PENANA7LpnAksMrX
age? - i'm still seven years old.543Please respect copyright.PENANAg2q79coWrh
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.543Please respect copyright.PENANAV8iLpDd4ro
something you hate about yourself? - my body.543Please respect copyright.PENANAT6eY72BFiD
something you like about yourself? - idk.543Please respect copyright.PENANAaajI0gf0dS
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.543Please respect copyright.PENANADrhQDTGgQU
favourite band? - bts.543Please respect copyright.PENANAuHUGH2P59T
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!543Please respect copyright.PENANADaOUt0EeIY
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.543Please respect copyright.PENANAew9OE5KPuz
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.543Please respect copyright.PENANAB4zd3hk1vU
girl crush? - emmi.543Please respect copyright.PENANAx3zFyTd5QQ
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.543Please respect copyright.PENANATJu4Wgys9U
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^543Please respect copyright.PENANAWSO8zYOQgy
talents? - singing.543Please respect copyright.PENANAqeCcQ3bd2X
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.543Please respect copyright.PENANATxdJWKxEmg
someone i love? - emmi.543Please respect copyright.PENANAD9ZqHC1d55
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.543Please respect copyright.PENANAseLGRHfKnC
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.543Please respect copyright.PENANACG68ZHr55X
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.543Please respect copyright.PENANAxNsIjkBzzY
favourite animal? - dogs.543Please respect copyright.PENANA4soI5NxFJB
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 543Please respect copyright.PENANAT2q5BBsvNr
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.543Please respect copyright.PENANAGSkAyVr4qq
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.543Please respect copyright.PENANAMtsY6iThD7
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.543Please respect copyright.PENANAC2etw7QMmG
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.543Please respect copyright.PENANAJHFczcm664
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 543Please respect copyright.PENANAfDgSSXgz88
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.543Please respect copyright.PENANAjIWpWBgEbz
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.543Please respect copyright.PENANAu8QVKRuj4H
~543Please respect copyright.PENANACEKOKyMjyb
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.543Please respect copyright.PENANASiXia9XkBr
country? - i don't live on earth. 543Please respect copyright.PENANAzfiCK6sa8u
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.543Please respect copyright.PENANANAnRBEqS1e
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.543Please respect copyright.PENANAYjVDRdGZgw
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.543Please respect copyright.PENANAIv308c28bL
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.543Please respect copyright.PENANAZY18AuC3v1
country with your favourite accent? - australia.543Please respect copyright.PENANAVn1JeRvUL3
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.543Please respect copyright.PENANA0x6zYLb4eG
dog or cat person? - both.543Please respect copyright.PENANAYPZiECfJDz
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.543Please respect copyright.PENANACqjpgVIXiP
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.543Please respect copyright.PENANAoiY5oLC2XQ
do you belive in God? - idk.543Please respect copyright.PENANA9GRxcMZABB
single or taken? - taken.543Please respect copyright.PENANApgJbwZc7uB
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*543Please respect copyright.PENANAw0jUF9v6bU
birthday year? - 1930.543Please respect copyright.PENANAnugvezoqFA
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.543Please respect copyright.PENANA037rlQs4wy
age? - what's that?543Please respect copyright.PENANAarXnjBAe4S
enthinicity? - african american.543Please respect copyright.PENANA1KITIOJrY5
tea or coffee? - neither.543Please respect copyright.PENANAIH96OL1bnL
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.543Please respect copyright.PENANAjGzp0AcHJZ
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*543Please respect copyright.PENANAo069cG3UdC
favourite food? - ice cream.543Please respect copyright.PENANAsy4ijhJMWB
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 543Please respect copyright.PENANASApfjsLOLI
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.543Please respect copyright.PENANAXZWqxeFHxP
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.543Please respect copyright.PENANAownLfsIRKJ
favourite soda? - sprite.543Please respect copyright.PENANAfrJdoYMh9T
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.543Please respect copyright.PENANAzkI7RzZi6K
can you swim? - yes, wtf?543Please respect copyright.PENANA6W4OMw4Fxv
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.543Please respect copyright.PENANAPvsuAw8cOH
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.543Please respect copyright.PENANAfx6AdIDhc6
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.543Please respect copyright.PENANA978yzy3i6F
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.543Please respect copyright.PENANA5juYcBWdYl
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*543Please respect copyright.PENANAjkSxN2HakM
apple or andriod? - apple.543Please respect copyright.PENANADznEvs4vSq
best dessert? - mochi.543Please respect copyright.PENANAkEuTHdSGG2
~543Please respect copyright.PENANA6m1UCKxRgK
have you ever:543Please respect copyright.PENANAfGpVDDUQPC
1. skipped class? - yes.543Please respect copyright.PENANADwDK9JC9JC
2. done drugs? - no.543Please respect copyright.PENANADreVw4BqM5
3. self-harmed? - yes.543Please respect copyright.PENANA6ejBMNz7Cp
4. drank? - no.543Please respect copyright.PENANAyLu64ozMaw
5. shoplifted? - yes.543Please respect copyright.PENANAjjjBjfLNpz
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.543Please respect copyright.PENANAOvQcfkamIE
7. broken up with someone? - yes.543Please respect copyright.PENANA7WcQLDwccJ
what's your favourite:543Please respect copyright.PENANAL2FxvucsbY
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.543Please respect copyright.PENANA77c2oEItt1
9. movie? - break the silence.543Please respect copyright.PENANAXwXLHKB2iD
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.543Please respect copyright.PENANA5McqCdOici
11. artist? - bts.543Please respect copyright.PENANAWn4SvKUscn
12. singer or band? - bts.543Please respect copyright.PENANAAXGhDu3yC8
13. memory? - idk.543Please respect copyright.PENANAasTsTnoXpZ
14. book? - the cruel prince.543Please respect copyright.PENANAQinDNRALPC
this or that:543Please respect copyright.PENANASMxedSOmDq
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.543Please respect copyright.PENANAharIXpAxQE
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.543Please respect copyright.PENANAFnvTVa1CnL
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.543Please respect copyright.PENANAVYTloHL7tD
18. movies or books? - idk.543Please respect copyright.PENANA3YAa07jtEE
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.543Please respect copyright.PENANA1c07LSGrOB
20. blind of deaf? - blind.543Please respect copyright.PENANAFa9FPUVXZv
21. tea or coffee? - neither.543Please respect copyright.PENANA21A9y74JUV
what's your:543Please respect copyright.PENANAO9jRrNeFD3
22. age? - ninety-one.543Please respect copyright.PENANAh7PQcpoOYL
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.543Please respect copyright.PENANAwEspJNUr6k
24. height? - 4'11.543Please respect copyright.PENANAHUilv65EWz
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.543Please respect copyright.PENANA7H3uDp9DvB
26. shoe size? - seven.543Please respect copyright.PENANAbfqK07mQV1
27. religion? - i'm not religious.543Please respect copyright.PENANA9xRGC3Ydlx
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.543Please respect copyright.PENANAomNqVbfmY5
opinion on: 543Please respect copyright.PENANAnAUmheQb3F
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...543Please respect copyright.PENANAksO5bKZlEF
30. second chances? - it depends.543Please respect copyright.PENANA3CYEAnrrWy
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.543Please respect copyright.PENANAsTgijpUbOl
32. abortion? - ew.543Please respect copyright.PENANACB4AETyN6w
33. a death penalty? - ew.543Please respect copyright.PENANAafa5k0NYtY
34. marijuana? - i likes that.543Please respect copyright.PENANAL6FW3p3kAO
35. love? - what's love?543Please respect copyright.PENANAkZT6YsC8VG
do you:543Please respect copyright.PENANAe7HErp6nGE
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.543Please respect copyright.PENANAoDtouAL3Xl
543Please respect copyright.PENANAFtC5Tyt1IE
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3543Please respect copyright.PENANAdee4P8BCd9