「其實點解咁堅決想剃⋯⋯哎。」我問到一半，醒起錐人痛處唔應該，立即收口，「咁我要點幫你，講句想你做和尚就得？」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQF13aAN01j
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdoMQ2zaVbd
「唔止㗎啦，仲要好誠心咁諗先得啦。」客人笑咪咪補充。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG6uXMkt9Cm
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VLONA1KMN
「哦。」老實我都唔知點為之誠心，自私講我緊係唔想同客人結仇，但點解要做和尚，啫係我希望佢開心得唔得先，就算出家，唔可以做神父牧師架咩，做道士又得唔得？不過試試無壞：「咁你去做和尚啦！」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc60XhpHONX
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1YfC6TG7K
我都無學過佛，咁樣心態真係會得咩？430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrF10CXcI78
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4lVNTvrHJ
師傅睇怕一早知唔得，都無等冷場，拍拍我背脊：「你知唔知和尚係做啲乜？如果唔知好難許願啫。」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF9uKaFDwxa
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkMX4yxK2Hk
「係咪敲經拜神食齋打坐果啲？」死，我又擔心自己在師傅面前答得太輕佻，於是恭恭敬敬講多句，「啫係好虔誠咁拜佛信佛嘅修行者？」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ55pOG943UB
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6eBtvKilt
師傅無奈搖頭笑一聲，露出了滿口煙屎牙，「咁又唔話得你錯，和尚日日都做呢啲⋯⋯不如咁啦，你拎住閻摩降，上清涼山補吓習先。」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kbaClZ9Kv
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN8YG8NjvMz
我正想問清涼山係邊，客人立即無獎遊戲搶答：「五臺山我呀媽都去過啦，醫生話佢生唔到小朋友，佢就上山搵文殊菩薩，坐旅遊巴果陣巴士倒後衝落山，但去到山涯邊就煞住咗，呀媽話成車人唯獨佢見到菩薩顯靈，仲指示佢去拜送子觀音，送子觀音即係童女嘅化身之一，童女就送咗我俾佢做仔啦。」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6SliAudvJY
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Aihn8szHI
「傻佬，我話清涼山啊，咩五臺山啊！」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWC9GMvrH4Z
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZG79AnnAvB
「唔係咩！東北方有處，名清涼山，從昔已來，諸菩薩眾於中止住；現有菩薩，名文殊師利，與其眷屬、諸菩薩眾一萬人俱，常在其中而演說法。《華嚴經》明明咁講架啵！《佛說文殊師利法寶藏陀羅尼經》咁講，有國名大振那。其國中有山號曰五頂。文殊師利童子遊行居住。為諸眾生於中說法。佛經咁講，人人都咁講！」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4DHdbZfHb
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI6F4vZN895
「哈！同我講經！咁你識唔識臨濟義玄！有一般學人向五臺山裏求文殊，早錯了也，五臺山無文殊！」師傅講到笑呵呵：「講經無撚用！拜佛哂鳩氣！你呀媽更加黐撚線！」
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6lOBffXtd
「唔準鬧我呀媽！唔準鬧我呀媽！唔準鬧我呀媽！」客人摸住自己耳仔，開始原地跳。「菩薩都無情講，菩薩都無情講！」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8nbuZSxhi
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMjSRgwmWSK
我無見過客人呀媽，唔到我亦唔識得評論，我唔識心理學，唔知咩叫自閉症，但知道要體諒多啲，師傅無再激客人，口講「你啱你啱」當投降，但我又唔見師傅有後悔過自己鬧人娘親，好似本身知道好多客人兩母子嘅事。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSJFlDPp39
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa8xhBjYd7u
師傅望望我，叫我嗱嗱臨去一轉清涼山，佢話我剃開個頭唔知點收尾，本身預咗，因為我唔知點解要人做和尚，又唔知和尚係乜，但知完自然就得心應手。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYfc3HOt1CU
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqH5ZXo8yNE
我心急問清涼山係邊，師傅就咁話：「唸返句咒就得，閻摩降識路架啦，同埋唔洗急到走夾唔抖嘅，頭先剃頭唔乾淨，元神又無斬甩到，反正你返嚟都要再搞一次。」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQbUxPd3Dq
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA0zmV18g1v
我心入面馬上嚟反應，覺得自己好似一個交唔到成績表嘅學生。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5mjdqtVac
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuXAaFOihHH
師傅又拍多下我背脊打氣：「俾啲精神！都唔關你事，係佢未諗清楚自己飛髮定剃頭啫，到時俾佢揀多次咪得！好好好，走先啦！」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5Dgpxja0I
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIo9Nt6k9uz
我點頭說知道，打算要走，行去門後又想拆門鈴，師傅話唔洗帶啷啷，因為我唔洗帶客人路，呢轉我自己去就得。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWVUC9mL1rm
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡePdh5GrjOR
客人想跟去，師傅叫佢唔好，而且未剃眉頭眼額，元神又跟咗入呢個新身體度，出門實會俾人斬，我宜家知咗咩係劍俠，就知師傅唔係真係講緊《天若有情》，油尖旺似乎一街都係劍俠，真係唔講無留意，失禮晒！430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDVvffF6AO
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7CVJWzRMzk
「咁叔叔呢？佢都係奪咗人身體，劍俠唔會斬佢咩？」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7CnnU0l4SO
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBh58EhZ8bH
師傅同客人講的野不嬲精彩，但我都唔想耽誤件事，我拋高剃刀，講句「請寶貝轉身。」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AYwl7ihYL
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL3fghOSbLi
「哈！」師傅無理啦間冷笑一聲，「佢前世咁惡咁記仇，邊個敢開佢齋啊！」430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqhOJkHRkhO
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwqmw10dvSW
師傅輕鬆講，我聽到背脊骨都直一直，完全係頸梗膊痛，但飛劍快，我呢刻已經唔再身處係飛髮舖。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt5DE3ZyAs3
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfOiAJbHwl
清涼山？但呢度雪山嚟架喎。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1yqhdxCAa
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzvDP6SX6Z
我落在積雪面上，兩腳立即插入雪中，深度差不多到膝頭哥。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQFT6oMy72
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHivTJPrxSt
我呢刻仲戇膠膠，以為去到雪山好撚出奇，屌你老母，我仲未知原來飛劍送咗我出太空。430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtmqZpAY2H
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRi5mR5Apr
俾啲心理準備我得唔得！
