Oppa. She always hesitated to use that word. The intention was too confusing, she thought. How was he supposed to know if she meant “oppa” as in “older brother” or “oppa” as a term of respect for an older guy she knew… or “oppa” as in “honey…” “darling…” “sweetheart?”664Please respect copyright.PENANA4IkgYRlkqy
It was unfair for a word to have so many meanings. Okay, maybe it wasn’t the only word in any language to have such nuances, but it was one word whose meaning should be absolutely clear and without question.664Please respect copyright.PENANA6ecXQleyTA
He started walking to school and back home with her everyday. It wasn’t planned. He lived two floors above her. She had hurried out of her apartment one day, shouting exasperated agreements at whatever her mother was saying, only to come face-to-face with him on the stairs. That was when it started.664Please respect copyright.PENANAhPhihdMu16
She would walk beside him, listening to him speak, trying to think of the right things to say. Her clammy fingers would find their way to the skirt of her school uniform and clutch at the fabric. She’d wipe her hands as subtly as she could, just in case he one day decided to hold her hand. She always wondered if he would have noticed her if they didn’t live in the same building.664Please respect copyright.PENANAUiZMXtw7MS
All the while, her mouth would rebel against her efforts to call him oppa. Honey. That was what she meant, and she wanted so much for him to know. How was it so easy for the other girls to call the boys oppa? They didn’t waste any effort doing it. She was the only one who seemed to have something broken inside her.664Please respect copyright.PENANAiKVmIy5RLq
In a fit of desperation, she took to listening to Girl’s Generation’s Oh! on repeat. “Oppa, oppa, I’ll be down, down, down, down,” she sang with them. Maybe if she said it over and over, it would be easier to finally say it when it counted.664Please respect copyright.PENANAX1ftDT9glt
And it seemed to work.664Please respect copyright.PENANApYgU2IUsAN
For the first time, she responded to his question with, “Yes, oppa.”664Please respect copyright.PENANA9wwaLfVuI7
Her heart ballooned in her chest, sweet spring air that smelled of cherry blossoms filling her lungs. This was her confession. He had to finally know how she felt about him.664Please respect copyright.PENANAUFEdUDFBvD
He patted her head as though she were a child—or a puppy.664Please respect copyright.PENANAtGLeB2sCXy
“I’m so glad you’re finally calling me oppa,” he said. “I think of you as a little sister too.”664Please respect copyright.PENANAAt3bUTZdwR
Oppa. She could imagine the deceptively innocent word pointing and laughing at her.664Please respect copyright.PENANAoNu7ehE1BP
Boy, did she hate it.664Please respect copyright.PENANAfDfdN4CMEv